His head pounded, that’s the first thing Hongbin noticed as he came to. Probably a sedative—a rather large dose, too. He moved to rub his temples, hoping to soothe the steady aching, but could not move his arms. Panic quickly set in and he opened his eyes only to have them invaded by painfully bright lights, forcing them shut again. He could feel his heart pounding in his chest, like it might burst out at any minute. What’s going on? Where am I? He tried to think back to earlier. I went to the hospital after classes like usual…I…I checked in on…who was it? Mrs. Jung? Yeah…and then..? The boy’s head throbbed painfully and he turned his head to the side with a groan. Someone shuffled beside him and his heart jumped in chest.

            “Hongbin! Are you awake? Are you..you?” A female’s voice cut through the panic. That sounds like…Hyoseong noona…?

            Hongbin forced his eyes open once more, trying to adjust to the lights.

            “I’m sorry, I should have thought about the lights. They gave you way too much of that sedative.” As the lights went out, Hongbin was able to make out a woman with delicate pale skin and wavy brown hair.

            “Hyoseong noona.” The boy tried to move again, but found that he was tied down to a hospital gurney.

            “Sorry, bean. You had another episode. The other doctors were afraid you might do something serious to someone else…or yourself.” She grabbed his hand, rubbing down the back of it to soothe his nerves. “I told them that it wouldn’t do anything to help if you woke and had an anxiety attack, but they wouldn’t listen.”

            He nodded, closing his eyes for a moment. So I had another episode? I guess that’s why I don’t remember anything… He his dry lips. “What happened?”

            The woman stopped rubbing his hand, opting to grab it tightly instead. “You…you jumped on Mr. Han earlier today.” She cleared your throat. “A nurse walked in on you and you had your hands around his throat, strangling him. He’s okay, barely even a bruise, but he’s making a big fuss about it to everyone.”

            His brain was still muddled thanks to the sedative, but he understood everything well enough. He tried to kill a patient. They could press charges. He could go to jail. The hospital could face serious lawsuits. His heart started racing again, all this work just for everything to go down like this. All his college work, all the work that he had put into this internship

            “‘m sorry, noona” The boy’s voice cracked. One tear fell, followed by another and another.

            “Shhh, bean. It’s okay.” She wiped the tears as they fell. “No one’s pressing charges, but..”She sighed, “the doctors and nurses have decided it’s best if we temporarily terminate your internship. There’s a lot of chaos right now and we need time to sort things out. I’m sorry, Hongbin.”

            Hongbin shook his head. “No, noona. I’m crazy…crazy to think that this could ever work…and just plain crazy.” Hyoseong undid the gurney straps and hugged the boy.

            “I’ll drive you home, it’s a bit late to be walking like you usually do.”

~

            The ride home was extremely uneventful compared to them walking out of the hospital. Many nurses and patients shied away from the handsome boy as he passed by, engaging each other in hushed conversation, obviously about the young intern. Hyoseong shot them a glare as if challenging them to continue.

            Once they arrived at Hongbin’s apartment complex, Hyoseong walked him up to his—number 6b. She patted him on the back as he stepped inside. “Don’t let this get to you, bean. You are a model student, one of the top students in your class, and patients love you. You’ll bounce back from this.”

            “Noona, I almost killed someone today—I don’t even remember it—and you don’t even seem to care.” The volume of his voice increased as he continued. “Such a model student I am. I wonder how many of my classmates will try to kill someone to be like me?! I don’t even think the university will want to keep me around as soon as this gets out! It’s stupid for me to want to be a doctor when I’m constantly the patient!”

            Hyoseong frowned. “No one’s going to hear about this. The staff thinks that it will bring them too much trouble to release the information, especially since Mr. Han’s family has no intention of suing. Besides, that’s the first episode you’ve had in months, that means your therapy is working, bean! Isn’t that worth celebrating?”

            “Not if it gets more violent.” Hongbin shut the door on his noona, dropping his stuff on the floor as he makes his way to the couch. Just as he flops into the dark leather cushions his watch beeps, telling him that it’s time to take his medicine. He digs through the pockets on his pants and pulls out two bottles. One is an antianxiety and the other, a depressant. He pops the lid off of both bottles and pulls out a few small pills. He rolls them around in his hand for a moment before taking them, swallowing them dry. If he gets that violent with them, he’d hate to see what he’s like without them. Hongbin sighs and rolls onto his back so he is now staring at the ceiling.

            This is such a mess…why did I have to be cursed with this? Dissociative Identity Disorder… He sighs to himself again. Or more commonly known as Multiple Personality Disorder…

~

This one kind of random, I admit. I’ve had so many ideas stirring in my head lately and now that school is out I can act on them, but I’m still not sure where I want this to go. I also don’t know if you can take an anti-anxiety medication while taking a depressant, so if that’s wrong correct me please. I’m also not claiming to have extensive knowledge in psychology and mental disorders so if some facts are incorrect, I apologize in advance.