Your pov.

The truth is I still loves him. I watched his interviews yesterday. I lied.I lied saying that I dont know
about the interview.I lied saying that I dont love him anymore. I lied saying that I never loved
him before. I lied saying that it was just some kind of stupid-childish-LDR-monkey-love.
It was LOVE for me.I cherished the moment when we're together.All this years,I kept updated
about him.I MISS HIM.The only way I cope with my longing of him is by watching all his dramas
and interviews. Of course,Tasha doesnt know about it.My brother doesnt know about it.
No one knows about it.


I watched his interviews yesterday...he...He still loves me.
Shouldn't I be happy?
Why am I feeling scared suddenly?
Why am I afraid that I will get hurt again?
I still loves him too.But I wont let my guard down.
I'm not that easy to be take then break again.I'm a strong woman.
I wont go back to him although my heart needs him.

Follow your brain woman! Dont follow your heart. That way you will not end up like
your mother.My mom is a woman whom I respected the most. She raised my brother and
me alone by herself. My dad left my mom and family when I was 5 and my brother
was 4 after selling off our house to pay his gambling debt...then he ran off to God knows
where~leaving us with not a single penny...then few years later married that rich .My
dad was probably having so much fun with that while my mom was screaming in agony
to push me out from her uterus.How could he!!!The day I was born was probably also the
day that my dad planted his ing on that rich .
Therefor,me and my brother had a stepbrother who is 10 months younger than me and the
same ty attitude just like my father and that .

Therefore,I hated my father very much.I hated that he made my mom cried everynight.
I hatedthat my mom needs to work 2 jobs.I hated that my mom need to work in a nightclub
when I was young.I hated that my mom came home drunk.I hated the smell of alcohol.
In short,I hated my father for the cause of my family's misery.Men are all the same.
They are like wolves in sheep's clothing.I blamed my mom for falling for my dad because of his
looks.That's what she said.I blamed her because of her stupid-ness.

I hated that I was molested a lot in the lift.There was no CCTV in it.I was only 12 when the
assault started.My mom rented a cheap apartment for us three to live in. I did
not told my mom because she will probably move out from that apartment...then where
would we stay?? So ,I kept my mouth shut. I was traumatized.I will rather use stairs
climbing up to 12 floors than lift. It continues till I was 14 years old but luckily he never
me just touched me....untill one day my younger brother saw that filthy guy put his hand
inside my pants in the car park.
My brother punched him in the face and soon my mom found out..
.we moved out from the apartment.

My mom cried because of the incident.It was a depressing moment.My mom blamed herself.
Again...I blamed my father that all this misery to happen.Since then,my brother is very
protective of me.I thinks that I'm not that beautiful or y but I hated myself that I seems
to attract those es to do their sinful acts on me.I hated all men except my brother.
There was no love in a man's dictionary.
Only , or bull.Love is fake.Love doesn't exist.

Untill you came into my life. You,Seo Kang Joon. Your eyes. They were clear. They were pure.
All the worst thoughts about men that I had in my mind doesnt revolves around you. You
are the first boy that I showed interest in. You are the first boy that I
willingly approached though I never approached a stranger before.
I was so sure that you
are the only boy in my life that I could give my heart to.

Who are you??
Seo Kang Joon, who are you?
What are you?
Why do I feel that you're different from any other guys?