Boy-type mangas aren’t Chanyeol’s cup of tea, but the current novel in his hand has noteworthy material that just might work on Jongin. But...this plan cannot be executed alone. He slyly looks over the edge of the pages at Luhan balancing a beanie soccer ball on his forehead, swiveling in Chanyeol’s chair while Kris lays on the floor, mindlessly shoving handfuls of chocolate balls into his mouth as he scrolls through what is most likely Junmyeon’s Facebook (they aren’t friends, Junmyeon doesn’t accept people he doesn’t know). Chanyeol is wary of attempting his plan because well, they’re boys. He doesn’t know if he can handle the both of them if they want to tussle because Chanyeol s up somewhere along the way.

    He toes off his sock, nose wrinkling because the smell that follows immediately is enough to make him gag but he holds the smelly, damp cloth between his toes and kicks it at Kris, successfully hitting him square in the face. Kris reacts justly, appalled, then coughs, then glares and punches Luhan in the thigh. The oldest startles and frowns, kicking back in retaliation. It ends with the two rolling across the floor, throwing cheap punches and pulling each other’s faces into their armpits and it’s a sad sight but it amuses him to no end.

    “...Why did I do this.” Chanyeol questions to himself when he realizes this was not a plan in any form to get Jongin to acknowledge his presence. “I’m gonna go take a dump, don’t break anything.” Chanyeol grunts as he hoists himself off of his bed, putting the open manga down on the bed and grabbing a different one instead, seeing as how this one didn’t have the cute girls he idolizes. He meanders around the mess of Chinese limbs with as much grace as a baby elephant, ungracefully scratching his as he leaves the room.

    “Ughaaha!” Kris snorts, flailing. His groans are muffled against the dirty wooden floor, the blond inhaling nearly ten pounds of dust bunnies with the side of his face plastered to the ground, Luhan sitting on his head and folding his legs in ways they’re not meant to be. Kris manages to roll over enough to slam Luhan into the bedpost, knocking the breath out of him and he loosens his hold. They lay slumped in exhaustion, catching their breaths. Chanyeol’s manga slides off the edge of the  bed, hitting Kris in the face. “Son of a -” He curses, snatching the book in annoyance.

    Luhan plucks the book from Kris before he can throw it somewhere. Luhan isn’t quite a manga fan himself, but he knows Chanyeol treasures these things more than his life. He flips through the pages, going past the slight dent in the pages where Chanyeol must have laid it open. “There aren’t cute ten year old girls with starry eyes in this one,” He notes before pausing on a certain page. He snickers, punching Kris in the arm to get his attention but dodging a half swipe to the cranium. Kris notices the comic being offered to him, raising a brow at Luhan.

    “Don’t do it.”

    “I’m gonna do it.” Luhan snickers, returning the book to its place on the bed.

    “Do what?” Chanyeol asks as he shuffles into his room, eating an apple and sitting in the swiveling chair Luhan had been lounging on.

    “You know what Jongin would like?” Luhan baits, wiggling obnoxious eyebrows and elbowing Kris who sighs, rolling away. Chanyeol immediately stops mid-bite, eyes wide as he looks at Luhan seriously. He lowers the apple, dabbing at his mouth in a gentlemanly fashion.

    “And what would that be?” He asks, surprisingly calm as he looks Luhan dead in the eye.

    “A super cutie girl!” Luhan announces in accented English, standing to his feet and putting his hands on his hips as though that would affirm his point more. Chanyeol quirks a brow, the evident ‘are you serious have you seen me lately’ expression blatant on his face. “Well?” Luhan prods, confidence faltering because Chanyeol rarely looks this serious as he knits his brows together.

“...Go on...” Chanyeol allots, sitting back in the chair as he listens to Luhan’s proposition.

“This!” Luhan proclaims dramatically as he raises clothes in the air, kicking Kris away when the larger male rolled back in with the articles.

Chanyeol chokes on spit when he realizes those are his sisters skirts. “Yah! We can’t! I won’t! Put those away! She’ll kill meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!” Chanyeol falls from the chair, stumbling towards Luhan who only maneuvers around him because all Park Chanyeol is is clumsy limbs.

“Hear me out,” Luhan holds a finger up, throwing a skirt to Kris who holds it up to look at the glittery pink fabric. “What do teenage guys like?”

“?” Chanyeol quips innocently, looking like a kicked puppy.

“...No.” Luhan falters. “Cuties with booties!” Chanyeol and Kris choke simultaneously, Luhan ignoring them. “Just think about it, look at all that mango-”

“Manga.” Chanyeol corrects but is brushed off.

“You read. Cute clothes for cute people, am I right?” Luhan lures, wiggling his brows. Chanyeol slowly accepts this as the truth.

“But I’m a boy.”

“Who says you can’t be a cute girl?” Luhan demands, punching the air. “Come on, let’s prove whoever said that wrong! You can be a cute girl and Jongin will definitely notice you!”

“Yeah!” Chanyeol shouts in agreement, standing on his feet and fistpumping. Kris watches calmly, stuck in between dumb and dumber and crying on the inside.

---

They went to different corners of the room with skirts draped over their arms, Luhan in the closet, Kris to the hallway, and Chanyeol to the shared bedroom bathroom. He feels shy slipping into the form fitting pencil skirt that hug his thighs, the peach pink complimenting the pale tone of his legs if only he weren’t so hairy.

“U-um, guys, are you done changing yet?” Chanyeol asks uncertainly, the apples of his cheeks tinted red as he pokes his head out.

“Done.” Kris grunts.

“Okay~” Luhan chirps.

Chanyeol takes a deep breath, stepping out of the bathroom only to see Kris and Luhan in their complete school uniform, in other words, their blazers and pants.

    “I’M GOING TO KILL YOU TWO.” Chanyeol bellows at the top of his lungs, lunging after them both but only missing horrendously as they split, galloping in different directions. Chanyeol can’t move quickly because the skirt inhibits his movement far too much.

    “But you’re such a cute girl!” Luhan screams, wiggling out of Chanyeol’s grip and sacrificing his jacket as he escapes.

    “It looks good on you!” Kris adds, tripping over Chanyeol’s sock on the floor in an attempt to not be smashed to death by Chanyeol’s desk. “Jongin will totally dig you!”

    Chanyeol lowers his desk, blinking curiously at the other. “He will?” He asks, lips puckered into a thoughtful pout. Kris nods frantically, dragging Luhan with him as he successfully manages to snatch the older’s ankle and yank him down to the floor with him with a loud thump.

    “Y-yeah! Actually, why not look cuter?” Luhan asks.

    “...cuter?” Chanyeol parrots, tilting his head to the side like a curious pup.

---

    Park Yura comes home with a sigh, hand on the nape of her neck as she tries to rub out the tension built up in her body. “Stress, stress, stress!~” She tuts, hearing noise coming from her brother’s room. The door is slightly ajar, she can hear the accented Korean of Chanyeol’s friends coming from inside.

    “Yeah, yeah! Just like that! Nice!” Luhan’s motormouth keeps running and curiosity spikes through her. Maybe they’re watching the FIFA World Cup games, she loves the sport herself. She smiles, pushing the door open.

    “Hey, boys, room for one mo-” She stops in her tracks, eyes wide open. Kris and Luhan are standing to the side of the room, bare-chested Chanyeol in the center. His giant feet are smashing the backs of her expensive Prada stiletto heels, her Gucci skirt is stretched taut around his muscular thighs, and her Victoria’s Secret bra is in his hand. He’s frozen stiff, eyes even wider and his mouth flapping silently, unable to conjure an explanation.

    “N-Noona...it’s not what it looks like.” He says meekly. He barely finishes the sentence before his sister is literally flying at him.

    “paRK CHANYEOLLLLLLLLLL!”

Kris and Luhan have never run so fast in their lives.

---

Minseok emerges from the shadows, chestnut brown hair flat on his forehead instead of its usual Heaven-pointed array of spikes. His ebony cloak sweeps across the linoleum tiles, every footstep silent.

Kyungsoo awaits him at the middle of the corridor, his face as solemn as Minseok’s when the elder approaches. They stare deep into one another’s eyes, looking beyond the person and into the depths of their entities. Kyungsoo is first to break the tension, his seniority of the arts granting him the authority as he steps forward, embracing Minseok momentarily.

“Hail Marta, brethren.” He whispers as he releases Minseok, walking past him into the gloom, becoming one with the darkness.

“Hail.” Minseok whispers with a glimmer of a tear in his eye as he clenches his fists, voyaging forward into the world he once knew, no longer as Minseok, but rather, a messenger, a soldier of the Almighty whose sole priority is to help the army grow.

The world must remember that Martha Stewart is the only divinity.

---

“I got it!” Chanyeol shouts, startling a dozing Luhan awake and making Kris skitter his marker across the paper, ruining his artwork. They’re the only three in detention, seeing as how Chanyeol got revenge for yesterday’s incident by shoving both of their faces into his armpits. He ambles up from his seat, limping to the whiteboard. He uncaps a marker, writing in gigantic but messy Hangul characters the words:

O P E R A T I O N S E N P A I

“Questions?”

Luhan shoots his hand in the air.

“Luhan?”

“What the hell is that?” Luhan asks, nonplussed.

“Er-” Chanyeol glances from Luhan to the board and back again. “Exactly what it looks like! We’re on a mission, now!” Luhan raises his hand again. “Yes?”

“What mission?”

“Er...to get Jongin to date me! And to get you with Minseok, and well, for Junmyeon to know who Kris is.” Kris scowls, looking up from his doodling.

    Luhan raises his hand again. Chanyeol sighs.

    “Yes, Luhan?”

    “Why are you naming it Senpai? Kris is older than Jumyeon. You’re a class above Jongin. If anyone should be on Senpai, it’s me.” He says smugly, lips curled at his clever little phrasing but it only gets disgusted grimaces from the other two.

    “It’s cute. That’s all.”

    “Chanyeol-ssi.” Luhan raises his hand again. Chanyeol is close to throwing the teacher’s chair at him.

    “What?!”

    “How do you plan on carrying this out?” It’s actually a good question, and Chanyeol unfortunately has no answer.

    “Er...We follow the commandments of the shoujo girl!” Chanyeol exclaims, holding up a manga book no one knows where he got from. He holds it high above him as though it’s a messenger of God. “Misaki-sama’s love story is impeccable but after my sister’s lesson, I will not dress as a maid! Teru-chan’s exciting adventures are above my IQ so I have to cross that out,” Kris and Luhan side eye one another, Chanyeol ignoring them. “I must be Sawako.” Chanyeol concludes with a nod, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. The quiet, sweet, shy school girl boy, of course everyone loves such characters! Jongin will surely see him more than a friend if a friend at all at last!

    Luhan raises his hand.

    “WHAT. WHAT IS IT. WHAT DO YOU WANT NOW, DAMMIT?!” Chanyeol bellows, Kris’ crayons go flying from the force of the Korean’s breath but Luhan is unfazed.

    “Your plan is cute and all, but what makes you think Kris or I would go along with it? You know we don’t read mango-”

    “Manga.”

    “So what gives you the delusion we will?” (“Luhan, why are you speaking for me?” “Are you really going to go along with his idea?” “...True. Continue.”)

    Chanyeol only smirks, closing his eyes as he covers them with his hand, posing like a badly imitation character being cool. “Does Boys ****** Flowers ring a bell?” The question hangs in the air, bringing with it tension and realization.

    Kris and Luhan gasp a moment later, covering their mouths with their hands.

    “The drama?!” Kris asks in bewilderment. Bingo. He had a feeling that a couple of Koreaboos would have fell for that.

    “The one and only.” Chanyeol responds coolly, flipping his hair but only to grunt as his neck pops, his hand immediately flying to his bandaged nape where his sister had kneed him.

    Kris and Luhan narrow their eyes at him before leaning in close to one another, whispering in rapid-fire Chinese

    “βå¤β åƒåȋβå;?"

    “ಥ_ಥ å§ďğ "

    “çȟåñÿ£¤Ƚ§ §ȋ§ț£ȑ ȋ§ ȟ¤ț •"

     "Sh."

    They look at each other in silence for a second before turning forward, glaring at Chanyeol who flinches in surprise. Luhan’s hand shoots into the air.

    “Uh...Luhan?” Chanyeol mutters feebly.

    “We’re in.” Luhan and Kris say together. 

---

A/N: ugh this is tiring to write omg

im watching danshi koukousei no nichijou and im going to cry

marta = martha stewart. marta is not a typo for once. and the 'goth' corner is actually some weird martha stewart worshipping cult that had been brainwasing minseok for like four days idk like any anime parents dont have a part in this just let the crack happen

the chinese thing between the chinese kids = idk i dont chinese i lao

yes, i called them koreaboos . just pretend. shh.

Mangas mentioned:

Danshi Koukousei No Nichijou (the boyish manga at the beginning): Luhan found the part where the boys (Hidenori and Yoake) were talking about skirts and tricked Tadakuni into wearing it while they got out unharmed. Tadakuni's little sis walked in though and kicked his )

Kimi Ni Todoke: Sawako (this manga bored me I didnt even try to get into the anime omfg)

Dengeki Daisy: Teru (i love this so much ofmg(

Kaichou Wa Maid-Sama: Misaki (tl;dr)

Hana Yori Dango --> Boys Before Flowers

I bleeped out Before because on Korean TV I guess you can't say brand names or something idk and the same runs for japan so kinda like i implimented no plagarism/copyright into a fic that is basically a rip off of every manga known to mankind plus its kinad for comedic effect because those who dont get it are like "Boys WHAT flowers?!?!?!?!?"

anywhore

comments and upvoting are EXTREMELY appreciated! ♥