"Hey Tao, how's your math homework going?" Kris wandered into the kitchen where Tao was perched at the table with far too many snack wrappers around him.

"Oh. I haven't started yet. I was hungry?" Kris suspected that really he was just stalling by eating all the food he could find, but let it go. He had to pick his battles in this home.

"Well, you should probably start soon..." Tao turned back to his unopened math book. Suddenly he wiped all of his wrappers off onto the floor and opened his book quickly, all in one fluid motion. "Hey, can you pick th-"

"Shhh! I'm trying to do my math homework!" Tao turned and gave him an ugly look before rolling his eyes and turning back to his book. Kris sighed and took a seat at the other end of the table, picking at the bowl of grapes in the center. He slowly counted the number of grapes it took until Tao gave up. He was on ten - a new record! - when the low whine finally came, "I don't understand..." Tao looked up at him with those sad eyes that they had all dubbed his "math" eyes and Kris sighed, knowing this was going to be another long math night.

"Okay, so I want you to imagine a pie," Kris began.

"What kind is it?" Tao interupted him quickly.

"What?"

"What kind of pie?"

"The kind doesn't mater. Now as I was saying-"

"The kind does matter! I need to know if its a fruit pie, creme-"

"It's not a real pie Tao!"

"So we're not getting pie?"

"No, why would we-"

"Don't get frustrated with me, you're the one suddenly talking about pie when I'm trying to do math, gosh!" Kris rubbed his forehead in frustration.

"Just imagine a pie please." Tao began opening his mouth to speak, but Kris cut him off, "Ask me what kind it is and I'll go get Chen to help you with math. You remember how that went last time, right?" Tao quickly shut up. "Thats what I thought. Now. A whole pie is equal to two mathematical pie."

"Kris, I know two doesn't equal one I'm not stupid. This is low of you. You sound like Chen. Trying to tell me two equals one... Not gonna fall for that again..." He grumbled the last bit to himself and Kris facepalmed.

"No, I mean the circular pie that you eat! That is two mathematcal pie!"

"Stop being Chen this is mean!"

"That's not what I mean Tao! Pay attention. Imagine the pie!"

"...Maybe I could understand this better if I had a real pie..."

An hour later Kris and Tao were still at the kitchen table, but between them was a chocolate pie. "Okay. Now you have your visual, can we begin again?" Kris asked, already feeling the grey hairs growing in.

"Can't we eat some first?"

"nO! This is your visiual for math!"

"But I'm hungry..."

"You just ate a ton!"

"I'm a growing boy, leave me alone!"

"Ugh!" Kris groaned. "Just pay attention a little longer and then you can eat pie!"

"Ew, I don't want to eat math." Tao whined.

"The food pie, not math!"

"Oh. Okay."

Finally they were back on topic, and Kris was able to continue, "Now, we have established that two math pies equal one food pie, correct?" Tao looked like he was about to interupt, but Kris raised an eyebrow. "Correct?" Tao looked down dejectedly at the pie,

"Correct..."

"Okay. Now, here's some new stuff. One tau, equals two math pies, so this food pie equals one tau."

"Are you calling me a pie?"

"What, no Tao-"

"Is it because I ate so much earlier? Is this your way of calling me fat? This is so rude of you, I can't believe you-" Tao was about to continue ranting when Luhan stuck his head in,

"Uhh, how's the math going?"

"Kris just called me fat!"

"No I-"

"Oh, is it because of the pie? Were you attempting to eat a whole pie again. We warned you that wasn't a good idea after last time..."

"No, he called me a pie!"

"No, I swear-"

"Oh, so wait if you're a pie does that mean you can't eat pie anymore? Is that cannibalism?" Tao looked dumbstruck for a moment before whimpering.

"...But I love pie..." Luhan gave him a funny half smile,

"Well, as the saying goes, 'you are eat you eat' Tao..." At that he turned and left the room, leaving Kris with a whimpering Tao, already reaching for a fork to dig into the pie.

He may or may not be a comfort eater.

It was another hour later and Kris had made no more headway with the whole math homework situation, although Tao had made quite a dent on that pie. At some point Lay had wandered in, smelling chocolate and he took a slice too, opting to take a seat next to Tao as he gossiped about Kris (right infront of him). "I mean, where does he get the idea that he can call me a pie? Like, who even does that? I mean, pie's are delicious and artfully decorated, he wishes he was a pie." And Lay just nodded all along, occaisionally eyeing the pie, contemplating another piece. "And like wow, can he even call me a pie? He's more of a pie than me, I mean wow, did you see him in practice the other day?" Kris looked down at his stomach, then back up at Tao with a glare.

"Okay, Chen time." And with that he got up and stormed away, in search of their resident Troll.

When Kris finally tracked down Chen, he promised that he'd be happy to help Tao with his math. Kris pretended to not see the evil gleam in his eye.

Just five minutes later Xiumin heard a scream that sounded worryingly like Tao and ran into the kitchen, "What the...?" Before him stood Tao with Chocolate goo dripping down his chin and a tin pie pan stuck to his head. Chen was laughing gleefully while Lay looked at the pie falling to the floor in sadness.

"I was just about to take that other piece..." He lamented.

"Hehe, now Tao has been pie'd. PEACE!" And with that Chen cackled and quickly ran away before Tao could pull some scary Wushu stuff on him. Xiumin sighed and walked slowly to the phone hanging on the wall. He slowly dialed a number he knew by heart.

"Yeah, hi. Suho? We have another pie situation..."

A/N: Haha, wow. It's been awhile! XP It feels good to be back! XD I shall soon have more on the way because hey, graduation is in a month yo. Bl