|chapter one.

No one knows me. I don’t have friends. Life is really a mess.

I’m living in a small apartment, alone. I only eat once a day or sometimes, I do not eat just to save one cup of noodles in the cabinet for the next day. I’ve been living like this for almost 10 years. I’ve always wanted to find a job with a high salary but they are not hiring an undergraduate like me.

My hair was a mess. I was looking outside of the window.

“Should I die... right now?” I thought.

I immediately opened the cabinet near to the secondhand television. “Where are the medicines?”

I’m thinking of doing a suicide right now. I remember there’s an expired medicine here. I took out all of the things and inside the cabinet and finally, I found the bottle of my expired medicine.

Best Before: 01/27/10

I looked at it and opened the lid. “You’re useless, Mira.” I said to myself.

I placed a lot of tablets in my hand and put it all inside my mouth. I choked. I was thinking of spitting it all out. But I already swallowed some of it. It didn’t taste good.

Suddenly, the telephone rang.

Should I spit it out...? Or not?

The telephone stopped from ringing but after a few seconds, it rang again.

I cough up the tablets that were still in my mouth.  “Aish.” I said in disgust.

I answered the call, “Hello...”

“Ya! You have to pay for your apartment right now.” It was the landlord. “Pay it or else, you leave the house right now.” She added.

“How much is the rent?” I asked.

“It’s 200 thousand won for the house and 100 thousand won for the water and electricity.” She answered.

300,000won. I couldn’t think of any, I just want to die right now!

I ended the phone call immediately and lied down to the floor. I felt dizzy and suddenly everything went black.  I heard someone opened the door but I couldn’t open my eyes.

I slowly opened my eyes. I could see people wearing white.

Am I in heaven?

Should I be in heaven?

I want to go to heaven.

But suddenly I closed my eyes.

I could hear people talking, “She tried to do suicide but it’s good that he only took 3 tablets. The medicine was expired but 3 tablets won’t work. She passed out because he hasn’t eaten for one week.”

I opened my eyes. I could see people looking at me. “Am... I.... in... heaven?” I asked.

They chuckled and shook their heads. I get up from the bed. “You’re in the hospital, Ms. Mira.”

Why am I in the hospital? I should be dead right now. Why am I still alive? Why? 

It was afternoon. I was the only person in that room. I looked outside the window. "Are you okay...?" Someone asked.

I nodded. 

"You have to live." He said. 

You have to live.

Should I be? 

I looked at the guy beside me. I didn't notice that someone entered my room. "Who are you?"

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Author's Note: 

Hello! This is just a short update. The second chapter will be posted tomorrow! Long update tomorrow! Please wait for it. Thank youuuu! Comments are loved. This is just kind of "prologue". Hahahaha! Don't forget to subscribe!