Cars are zooming pass in glaring blurs of red and white lights. Luhan looks from the hurried traffic to the man sitting beside him. Minseok had stopped playing with his shirt’s cuff, but his hand was still gripping it as he stared with blank eyes forward. Luhan isn’t sure if he is staring at the city ahead of them or something unseen and not really there. When Luhan turns to the city before him, he actually looks at it, taking in the buildings tall enough to touch the sky, the glow of light that promises life and fun at every second.

"I thought it would be best for the both of us if you didn't know," Minseok says.

"Why," Luhan asks, it comes out as a whisper. "I would have understood. I know what type of man he is, you wouldn't have even needed to tell me what he was blackmailing you with. I would have helped you." It feels weird telling Minseok that he would have helped with no questions asked, but he’d done it time and time before, Minseok had given him half-truths and white lies and Luhan had accepted it, had trusted that Minseok would eventually tell him everything.

“There’s this really overused saying that the older District Eighters use,” Minseok starts off. “Rather they’re talking about the Perfects of the wealthier districts, or the children of our own, ‘ignorance is bliss’. They say our government runs on it, the less the public knows the happier the public will be. When it came to this—because of your history with President Kim—I believed not telling you would keep you safe and happy.”

"I find it hard to believe that you didn't think far enough ahead to imagine how'd I feel when I found out," Luhan says next.

“I did,” Minseok says. “I didn’t think we’d be having this conversation when you found out. You were supposed to have been done with me at that point. The moment I stepped into Nessen I knew it was going to be the last job I would have, and when President Kim approached me I thought about doing the moral thing, but I didn't want to go back to that place and he knew that and used it against me. I told myself it was okay because my feelings for you were real and I could keep you safe by reporting nonsense to him until it was over."

It's Luhan turn to be silent, to have Minseok wait as he sits and thinks and recalls. There is still much he wants to know and ask, but many of those things he’s not sure he wants to really know the answer to. "...You didn't start dating me because you changed your mind, did you?"

He can feel Minseok's eyes on him, but he refuses to look at the secretary as he waits for the answer he already knows. Minseok had been adamant about their fundamental differences, and Luhan had thought that was because they were from different districts, but it hadn't been. Minseok was an Imperfect, and that wasn't as easy to ignore as cold houses and hardened hands.

"No," Minseok answers, Luhan can hear something in his voice but he refuses to decipher it. "He didn't ask me to date you, he gave me a personal excuse to use when I wanted to be with you but was too afraid to act on it."

Luhan clenches his jaw and turns towards the traffic. "That's not good enough," he whispers. "I don't think I can be with you right now," he adds. He sees the faces of past lovers in the glowing red of the passing cars, lovers that had done far less than what Minseok has done and yet were given far less understanding and revulsion swirls in his gut.

Luhan hated Imperfects, hated how outright pathetic they were. He hated that even when they were wrong, they still made you pity them. Minseok wasn’t deserving of his pity, he had choices, multiple choices, and yet he chose the wrong option, to lead Luhan on, and lie and use him.

"Every time I look at you it makes me angry," Luhan says, "and I hate myself a bit more for being such a fool. Everyone I've ever been with has lied to me and I expected that from them, but I thought you were different. It was stupid of me to think of you as different... I don't think this world allows honesty to exist." He starts the car again and turns towards Minseok, doing his best to ignore the look in his eyes.

"I won't report you," he says. "So, where do you want me to take you?"

"Home," Minseok replies. Luhan's lips tug downwards into a frown, but he nods his head.

****

The street Minseok’s family home sits on is deserted. The sole working streetlamp flickers as fast as a heartbeat, and the houses stand lifeless in the shadows. The first time Luhan had seen Minseok's home it was the only one with light, the only one that looked warm and welcoming, now just like its neighbors it looks dead. Luhan looks from the house to Minseok, and is startled to see the secretary already looking at him.

It wasn't that long ago when he’d felt something raw and new every time he’d met Minseok’s eyes. It had been a feeling of being trapped and overwhelmed by his emotions. Back then he’d been afraid but he’d enjoyed it, now there was a new feeling and he hated it. "I'll keep you safe from him until we can figure something out," he watches as Minseok's lips quirk, but continues. "I'm sure you can handle yourself against him as well."

"You hate Imperfects, Luhan," Minseok says, his smile still on his lips.

"I don't..." Luhan trails off. "I don't hate you the way the government hates you. I'm helping you because I think it's unfair the way President Kim put you between us. If he hadn't, it would be different."

"You'd have had me taken away," Minseok asks.

"I'd do what I felt was best," Luhan says, "I'm not sure what's best in this situation for either of us, except that I can't be in the same room with you. I need time to think."

"So my future is in your hands now," Minseok says, sighing and leaning his head back.

"Isn't it better to have it in the hands of a man who genuinely cares about you versus some megalomaniac that throws people away like they're cheap toys?" He shakes his head, turning away from Minseok. "It doesn't matter. I'll help you until I can get you out of President Kim's hold, then you can do what you want from there. It's your life."

No one makes a sound nor moves, Luhan can still feel Minseok beside him, staring at him, but he's back to refusing to return his gaze. He hears the click of the door, and feels the rush of a restless breeze. "Thank you," Minseok says. Luhan doesn't reply. He keeps his eyes aimed straight ahead until the door closes and he's alone in his car, and then he takes off.

****

Luhan eyes snap open as his body lurches upward.  He falls back down into his bed, and breathes in a deep breath of air, releasing it as the fragmented pieces of his mind worked their way back in place. His room is dark, but his internal clock has him believing the day has long started. His tongue sticks to the roof of his mouth, and his clothes from the day before sticks to his body. There’s a shrill ringing in his ear which he realizes is the sound of his phone.

Luhan toys with the idea of looking for the device, and going into work, but he heaves a deep groan and turns in bed so he can press his face against the pillows to escape the stench of alcohol clinging to him.

The second time Luhan opens his eyes, his room is still dark, but the persistent ringing of his phone has stopped. There is less of a drowsiness as he lies in bed, contemplating rather or not he should really stay home.

He wants to stay. He wants to drive President Kim mad a little while longer, but with the alcohol waning from his bloodstream and his bed gradually increasing in size, he settles for being the responsible adult that has someone else’s life in his hands.

****

"Is President Kim alone," Luhan asks as he crosses the room towards President Kim's office. Minseok nods his head, not looking up from the screen of his computer. Luhan doesn't question the behavior, instead he steps into the all-white office, doing his best to control his grin as he meets President Kim's livid expression.

"Were you trying to piss me off," President Kim asks him, voice low and threatening as he glares at Luhan.

"No sir," Luhan replies.

"I thought I made it clear you would refrain from such behavior unless you wanted me to intervene," President Kim says next.

"I thought it would be best to have the tabloids talking about me instead of wondering about the fate of your highest sought after models, now that I'm gone. I'm sure it wouldn't be hard to trace Sehun's whereabouts. I'm told he wasn't all that discrete in his obsession with that Imperfect," Luhan replies. "We wouldn't want the cover up backfiring."

"You thought it would be best to keep the tabloid reporters off the traitor's tail by destroying our image instead," President Kim asks in disbelief.

"No," Luhan asks. "I only went out to drink and nothing more. I didn't leave with a person, and it was a under the guise of celebrating my promotion.” He leans forward in his seat, eager to explain his newly thought up plan to the older man.  “Let me continue on with this for a while longer, and I can guarantee you that they won't care about Sehun's whereabouts until we're able to put out the story we want, and then I can promise that any speculation about his leaving will be in the context of the group dynamic and his relationship with me, instead of who he may have left with." President Kim's glare hs hot on his skin as Luhan stares at the desk in front of him, attempting to keep his expression as neutral as possible.

It was a good plan even if it only took Luhan the car ride over to think of. President Kim wouldn’t want to give into Luhan’s whims, but he’d agree and enforce as many restrictions as he could to show Luhan who was still in charge. That didn’t bother him.

"If you'd like time to think it over sir, I can check in with Joohyun in the meantime," Luhan states standing.

"Whatever you're planning," President Kim starts glaring at him. "I will find out, and when I do find out, you and that lover boy of yours will have a lot more to worry about than tabloid speculation."

Luhan finally grins, his lips tug upward exposing his teeth as he smiles down at President Kim. He feels unafraid and so powerful, and now, now he could understand why Second Gens were so reckless. Caution was for those who feared and doubted their abilities. “I’m not planning anything sir,” he promises.

President Kim remains staring, and Luhan can feel him searching and analyzing him, attempting to understand what has changed within the former model. Luhan does his best to keep his smile from widening, so he won’t be seen as taunting the older man.

“You’re dismissed,” President Kim states. Luhan nods and turns away, leaving the office.

When he leaves President Kim's office he's tempted to stop and talk to Minseok, but he buries the temptation. He didn't need to reassure Minseok that he'd be okay. Luhan had already promised him that, and he was sure President Kim had already called him in to ask about their relationship. Time away from Minseok meant Luhan was repositioning Minseok's place in his life, and that meant ignoring the feelings that were still racing about within him.

Joohyun looks surprised to see him as he steps into the office, her hands are grabbing at the strands of her dark hair, pulling her hair into a ponytail as she greets him with an uneasy smile. "Sir," she says, toffee brown eyes roaming over him looking for something off. "I didn't think you were coming in today," she says.

"Sorry about that," Luhan tells him, he doesn't feel guilty about coming in late to a job he never wanted, but with Joohyun being so easy to work with he didn't want to strain that relationship as well.

"I've actually expected worse," she tells him. "It's no secret that you didn't ask for this job and you're well-known in most clubs. I'll admit that I expected to do a lot more to cover for you."

"Well," Luhan begins, "if I have a hangover tomorrow you can do all the work I'm too unwell to do."

Joohyun grins at him, and turns towards her monitor. "I've already started some of your more important work. You have to look over the planning for next month's style showcase and give your input. The budget plans are there as well."

Luhan grimaces at her words, but nods his head and enters his office to get to work.

****

Someone is in his apartment. The lights are on and Luhan usually kept the setting to manual, preferring to switch them on himself instead of having them blind him the moment he stepped inside.

Luhan could hear the softest tapping sound while he stood at his door, but whoever was in his apartment was refusing to come to him, which meant kicking them out would be harder.

He pushed forward walking deeper into his apartment, the alcohol in his gut sloshing about as he advanced towards his kitchen with measured steps.

Kris is there, head resting in the palm of his hand as he looks to Luhan with a tired expression.

“His things are still here.” It's the first thing Kris has said to him since their fight in his office.

Luhan blinks at Kris, slow and confused and then he casts a quick look around the room. “What,” he asks. Kris stares at him, and so Luhan stares back waiting for Kris to comment on his inebriated state.

“That secretary… Minseok, his things are still here,” Kris clarifies.

“I never gave him a chance to get them,” Luhan replies, walking deeper into the kitchen for a glass of water.

“But you broke up,” Kris says.

Luhan frowns turning towards him and glaring. Kris stares back and Luhan can see the spark of amusement in his eyes. “How did you know,” Luhan asks.

“This is your routine,” Kris says. “Go out, get drunk and hook up with a few people, and then find someone else to invest your spare time in. You usually don't keep their things lying around.”

Luhan opens his mouth to speak, but he shuts it just as quickly, the resentment comes rushing back to him and he glares. “I'm fine. You can go,” Luhan says suddenly. Kris frowns, but Luhan ignores it, walking out of his kitchen and towards his bedroom.

“Are you still mad about our argument,” Kris asks. “I'm sorry for what I said, but it's not fair that you're the only one that gets to make bad decisions.”

“You think being with your intern is a bad decision,” Luhan asks.

“No,” Kris answers. “You do. I can take care of myself, Luhan.”

Luhan stares off into nothingness, and he nods. “Okay,” he says. “You may leave now.”

“I’m not leaving,” Kris responds. “What happened? Why are his things still here?”

Luhan tries to recall what Kris knows and what he doesn't, and what he hopes Kris doesn’t know. Then he makes a list of all the things he won't talk about because it makes him seem pathetic.

“Minseok is an,” Luhan starts, and then stops. He still hadn’t used the word in relation to Minseok out loud. “He’s an Imperfect.” He forces the word out, waiting for Kris to say something.

First, let me say once again, I am sorry. I read every comment and sometimes I don't reply because I get too busy in between updates.

Second, as much as I love summer, it's honestly the worse season for me. My brother is out of school and I'm working so my time to write on anything that isn't my cellphone is barely there. Updates will be slow, expect one at the end of July and possibly one in August. I think this fic is taking so long to end because I started it right before the start of summer.