“Taesun-hyung?” Taemin said hesitantly as the door to the apartment was opened, revealing a tall boy dressed in sweatpants and a loose tank top.

          The boy chuckled. “It's been a long time since you called me that.”

          Taemin bit back a retort, instead deciding to get straight to the point. “I need somewhere to stay tonight.”

          “Y-you want to...stay here? Um...” Taesun looked taken aback and Taemin nearly rolled his eyes. What else did he think Taemin would be doing there so late at night?

          “Yes.” he replied. “I think you owe me that much.”

          Taesun blinked but quickly nodded. “Er...come in.”

          They stood awkwardly in Taesun's living room, Taemin looking out of the window with his back to the older boy. Their silence filled the room, stretching suffocatingly over several minutes until it was finally broken by Taemin's voice. “So...you went to Japan, then.”

          Taesun swallowed. “I wanted to take you with me.”

          “Then why the hell didn't you?” Taemin shouted suddenly, spinning around. He felt something more intense than anger swelling up inside of him; all of the painful memories that he'd locked away, finally coming to the surface. And it hurt, a lot. “Do you have any idea what it was like without you?”

          “Taemin...I don't know what to say. I'm sorry...”

          “I'm surprised you even remembered me,” Taemin said bitterly, “You must have been so happy, with your new life abroad. No family problems to burden you any more.”

          “You're my brother, of course I remembered you! I thought about you every day. I felt so guilty...” Taesun sighed, running his fingers through his hair and letting it flop back over his eyes. Taemin recognised that habit; it was something that he himself could never stop doing. “And it wasn't...you don't know what it was like for me. It's all right for you, Taemin-ah. You got away...and now look at you; you're happy, you've made new friends, you're building a life for yourself...everything I always wanted.”

          Taemin clenched his fists. He has no idea. “Do you know what he did, after you left?” Taemin asked quietly, almost in a whisper. “He went looking for you for three days, not coming home once. When he came back he was drunk and angry and guess who he took it out on? You see this scar on my stomach?” he rolled up his t-shirt and Taesun gasped, his eyes widening. Taemin almost smiled...almost. “The doctors say I'm stuck with it for life, but I'm lucky really...you should've seen what I looked like after it happened. She cried every night for a week. And then she killed herself.”

          There were tears in Taesun's eyes. It was a while before he finally replied. “You mean she-she's dead? Our mother...dead?”

          “Yep. She took an overdose and died in her sleep. That's when I ran away.” he faked a smile. “But it's okay now, hyung, isn't it? Because I've made some new friends.”

          “Oh...God.” Taesun sat down on an armchair in the corner of the room and rubbed his eyes. He looked up at his younger brother, his gaze pleading. “You have to understand, Taemin. There was nothing else I could do. You have to forgive me.”

          “I don't blame you for leaving; it's what I would've done,” Taemin replied, his voice cracking slightly. He took a deep breath. “But I can't forgive you.”

_

          Half an hour later, when Taemin was asleep, there was a loud knock at the door. Taesun hadn't been able to fall asleep and was quick to get up and answer it. Who the hell could it be this time? His first ever two visitors...all in one night.

          “You...?” Minho gasped as he stood on the doorstep.

          “Oh my God,” Taesun breathed. “How...how did you find me?”

          “I didn't,” Minho said, appearing just as baffled. “I followed Taemin here...where is he?”

          “You know Taemin?”

          “I could ask you the same thing. Now if you won't tell me where he is, let me in.”

          “No.”

          Minho's eyes flashed threateningly. “Why not?”

          “Because if you're the guy my brother is running away from – if he chose me over you – then I doubt he'd appreciate me inviting you in for a cup of tea. What did you do to him, Minho? Is it because of me? Because if it is...”

          “Wait just a minute...your brother?”

          “Yes. Lee Taemin, Lee Taesun...seems like a lot of people have trouble putting that together.”

          “He didn't tell me he had a brother...” Minho murmured, shaking his head. He then fixed Taesun with a fierce stare. “Does he know? What you did?”

          “No, of course not. And you are not going to tell him, understand? I don't know what kind of relationship the two of you have but I'm not letting you get in the way of me and my brother.” His tone was firm but Minho stood his ground, not intimidated in the least.

            “You sick, sick bastard.” he whispered, turning on his heel and walking away, leaving Taesun to stare after him before closing and double-locking the door. He wasn't taking any chances.

_

           The next morning, Taemin entered the kitchen fully dressed in the previous day's clothes to find Taesun sitting at the table, eating toast and reading the newspaper. He finally looked up when Taemin announced he was going out.

          “Where?” asked his brother. Taemin gritted his teeth; not this again. Was Taesun going to stop him from leaving the house on his own as well? Did everyone think he was a child?

          “Just out. Anywhere away from here.”

          He sensed his brother's discomfort but he didn't care. All Taesun asked in the end was, “Don't you want some breakfast first?”

         “No.”

          “Well, when will...I mean, will you be back?”

          There was a hesitant pause as both brothers waited for the answer. “I don't have anywhere else to go, do I?” Taemin said quietly.

          They locked eyes for a moment, their faces so alike it was as if they were looking into the mirror. Taemin was the first to break eye contact and he nodded slightly to his brother before heading for the door. He was becoming too used to this, sleeping in an unfamiliar place and leaving at the first opportunity...it was lucky that the concept of 'home' had never been something he felt comfortable with.

         He wandered down the unfamiliar street, once again having no idea where he was headed. It was more of a run-down area of town than where Minho lived; the streets were filled with rows of small, nondescript houses with the occasional apartment block, absent of any shops. A shopping mall would have been ridiculously out of place among the neglected front gardens and rubbish bins filled with beer cans – so that was out of the question, for Taemin. He hadn't noticed the night before, but he must've strayed pretty far from the part of town he was used to when given the directions to his brother's apartment. He felt completely lost.

         He passed a stall selling ddeokbokki and his mouth began to water at the delicious-smelling aroma. He hadn't eaten since the previous afternoon and his stomach rumbled discontentedly. He was so tempted...but he decided that it would be much more sensible to save his money.

          Before he could stop himself he was thinking of Key, and how he would always cook the sweet-yet-spicy rice cakes for Taemin when they had a free evening together, or whenever the younger boy had been feeling particularly upset. Taemin didn't know a better cook than Kim Kibum; it had always been one of his friend's many talents (and probably Taemin's favourite).

          The tears didn't come as they usually did when he thought of Key; instead, he was filled with a warm, pleasant feeling which seemed to numb all of the stress and pain he'd been feeling recently. He didn't understand it but it made a nice change, and he tried to focus on more of the good memories.

          There was that time when Taemin had twisted his ankle while dancing. He'd been in so much pain and had whined at Key for hours to take him to the hospital, but Key had just shaken his head, insisting that his care would be better than any drugs the doctors could prescribe. He'd let Taemin eat all the ice-cream he wanted, and the two of them had spent all afternoon playing board games and chatting (Key had let Taemin win, but only because he was injured, he assured the younger boy). It was so much fun that Taemin had suggested he twist his ankle again the following day, but Key had glared at him so fiercely that he'd decided it might not be such a good idea after all.

          Then of course there was Key's sixteenth birthday, when his parents were away for the weekend and it was just the two of them in the house. Taemin had spent all of his money on a new watch for his friend, and he'd decorated the living room with streamers and balloons so that Key wouldn't have to miss out on a birthday party that year. The older boy had complained that it was way too much trouble, and it took them ages to clear up afterwards, but Taemin would never forget the smile Key had on his face for that whole afternoon. Taemin had felt so proud, because for once he'd actually done something for his hyung, instead of the other way round.

          And then before he could think properly he was getting on a bus, the bus, and he knew exactly where it was going, and he knew it was a bad idea but he couldn't help himself, he had to. Something was telling him it was the right thing to do, that he needed to be there, and it was stupid but Taemin couldn't think of a reason strong enough to get off the bus, couldn't summon up the will to go back, because where would he go? He had spent so much time running away but maybe this was what he was supposed to do, maybe he was supposed to go back.

          He felt nervous and scared as he perched on the rough fabric of his seat, oblivious to the chatter of the other passengers and the cars passing by. What exactly was he expecting? He had been unable to even think of returning up until now, and all of a sudden here he was, unconsciously making the decision that the conscious part of his mind had so strongly rejected. Could it be that some part of him hadn't fully come to terms with what had happened, was still holding on to the part of his life from before? Could it be that he was expecting to return and discover that it had all been a dream, a misunderstanding; that all of the change in his life over the past two weeks had been a figment of his imagination?

          Had there been any humour left in him he would've laughed at himself. Wishful thinking, that's all it was.

          Even so, he got off at the right stop and starting walking in the right direction. The streets here were all so familiar; the instant rush of memories hit him like a punch to the stomach as he looked around him, his heart beating faster in his chest. The neatly trimmed hedges, the colourful terraced houses...it hurt because he remembered so well,this was his life and yet it wasn't, not any more...and he had once loved this perfect, quiet little neighbourhood but now it just looked dull and lifeless to him, because the one thing he had loved the most, the one person, wasn't here any more...

          It was then that the tears came, finally, and Taemin didn't bother to wipe them away because he didn't care if people saw him like this, it just didn't matter because Key wasn't there to scold him for making his cheeks blotchy or letting the tears drip onto his clothes. His sobs turned into full on crying and he stopped walking as everything enveloped him at once; images of his best friend laughing, his cat-like eyes sparkling in the sunlight as they walked home from school for the last time. Key's excitement as he picked out an outfit for the party, trying on countless items of clothing before he finally settled on a simple grey shirt and ripped skinny jeans. Taemin's knees buckled underneath him and he knelt on the ground, trying to will himself to get a grip but failing – it was lucky there was no-one around but Taemin doubted they'd even care anyway. Even Key had left him; Taemin remembered his friend's apologetic backward glance as he'd disappeared (although he would never admit it) in search of more entertaining company. He remained on the ground for what seemed like a lot longer than it was, before slowly getting to his feet because he was there for a reason, though he had no idea what that reason was any more. Finally he did wipe his face, having nothing to use but the back of his sleeve but deciding it was better than nothing. Key wouldn't like that.

          And then oh god, he was at the house. Key's house. It was just as he remembered, with bright red paintwork and little window-boxes filled with pink and yellow chrysanthemums. He'd expected there to be something missing, something different...but it was as if nothing had changed whatsoever.

          Taemin took a tentative step forward, reaching out a hand to touch the top of the white fencing as if reassuring himself that it was completely real. All of a sudden there was a noise from within and Taemin froze, staring in fright as the door slowly swung open.

          A familiar figure emerged, watering can in hand, and Taemin held his breath as she looked around a little wearily, not appearing to notice him. She was far from the pristine, glamourous woman Taemin remembered; she was dressed in sweatpants and an over-sized jumper, there were dark circles under her eyes, and her hair was un-brushed and out of place. It seemed that she'd been hit hard by the death of her son, and he had the sudden urge to run forward, to comfort her and tell her that he, Taemin, understood exactly what she was going through.

          But he didn't. He couldn't. Not when he knew that he'd only serve as a reminder of everything she'd lost. He was alive and Key wasn't – Taemin felt selfish, but it was enough that he blamed himself without having to handle someone else's blame.

          He watched as she watered the plants with very little enthusiasm. He told himself he shouldn't be there, willed himself to turn around and walk in the opposite direction, but there was an unexplainable force holding him in place. He was in a sort of daze, his mind no longer filled with memories but completely blank.

          He quickly snapped out of it, however, as soon as she turned around. Her sharp eyes seemed to look right into him as she too froze in shock. Taemin was reminded even more strongly of his best friend, her son.

          “Tae-Taemin-ah?” she finally gasped, the watering can falling to the ground and spilling half of its contents onto her slippers. “Is that you?”

          No...I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have come here...

          He turned and ran without a second thought, his heart threatening to jump out of his chest as he tried desperately to stop the memories from flooding back, memories of evenings spent around the dinner table, of shopping trips to the local supermarket, when he first felt like he had a real family...

          “Taemin!” she called after him, now just a figure in the distance. “T-Taemin-ah...!”

          He ignored her, not even sure if it was her voice or just his imagination. He carried on running, past the houses on that street and round the corner, crossing the road, not back the way he came but in another direction entirely...a route he remembered so well, had taken only once but so, so recently...a route he had sworn to himself never to take again...

          There were policemen there when he arrived, at least ten of them – the place was surrounded and cordoned off with more police tape than Taemin had seen in his life. Here at least there was some change; it was nothing like the grand house Taemin remembered. Nothing but ruin and ashes and debris from the explosion. None of the remains were remotely identifiable as possessions, and the burnt structure of the ground floor was still partly intact but it looked like it could collapse any second.

          The numb feeling was back, but not in a good way this time; it was just his mind's way of stopping him from going crazy, from thinking of the details of that night. He wondered what Kim Heechul's parents had made of the explosion; presumably they'd be grieving the loss of their son rather than their house, but it had to be a shock to return from a business trip and find this. Did they know about Key and the others, Taemin wondered? Did they care?

          He was suddenly overcome with a desire to go inside, to see the ruin for himself. It was just asking for trouble, he knew...but he wanted to see what the remains of the house looked like now, without the fancy chandeliers and water fountains and rooms filled with drunken teenagers. Here was something even more destroyed than Taemin himself, and he knew it was ridiculous but some part of him was strangely comforted by that fact.

          None of the policemen had spotted him yet, due either to luck or a lack of interest on their part. Before he had a chance to talk himself out of it he crept closer, behind two of the men who were having a conversation amongst themselves, and ducked under the yellow tape. Once on the other side he held his breath for a long moment, half expecting someone to jump out from behind a charred bush or something. Slowly, cautiously, he crept nearer to the house until he was almost at where he remembered the front door to have been. A man in uniform walked past and Taemin had to nearly throw himself behind a large wooden object (it could've been anything from a grand piano to a bed frame, he couldn't tell) to avoid being seen. Shaking with nerves, he made his way inside.

          The rancid smell of smoke filled his lungs, causing Taemin to gag silently and cover his mouth and nose with his sleeve. He looked around and instantly regretted his decision to sneak in; there was nothing unexpected here, just piles of what used to be furniture and walls and ceiling, all burnt to a crisp. Well...at least they'd removed the bodies.

          The upstairs balcony was long gone, and so was the living room where he suspected Key had been when it...happened. Whole rooms that had been filled with countless expensive items, all gone in less than a second. Taemin thought it was almost ironic that a luxurious house which would've taken so long to build was destroyed so incredibly quickly.

          Too bad that the guests were no longer there to appreciate the irony.

          He had now reached the back of the house and he stumbled into the garden, tripping over a misplaced marble ornament on the way. Not much had changed outside except for the lack of flowers and the dry, yellowish grass that had once been emerald green. He'd never appreciated the garden before when it had been packed with people, his only escape from the blaring music coming from indoors. For the first time that day he thought of Minho, thought of how they'd first met. How Taemin had fallen, embarrassed, into the other's arms...completely unaware that it would be those very arms that would save his life.

          Something bright caught his attention out of the corner of his eye and he moved closer to examine it. It was a white A4 envelope; apparently undamaged and completely out of place at the scene of an explosion. He bent down to pick it up and ran his fingers along the smooth paper, seeing that it had already been opened. Without hesitation he reached in and pulled out two pieces of folded lined paper which had been written on in blue ink.

          The first was a set of what appeared to be instructions, in Japanese.

          The second was a detailed floor plan of the very house he'd been standing in moments ago.

          Taemin gasped, his eyes widening, for that was not all.

          There on the corner of the second sheet, written plainly in Korean, was a single name. A name he knew well.

          CHOI MINHO.

A/N: First of all, I know this took ages and I'm sorry that I fail at updating! Also, I'm incredibly sorry for the complete lack of 2min in this chapter, it's just that I need to develop the plot a lot more if this story is ever gonna go anywhere....I'll try and make up for it in the next update so please don't hate me, okay? ;_;

I'm going away on Saturday which unfortunately means no updates for a little while, but please bear with me as I have planned the next few chapters and I'm trying to fit in as much writing as I can on top of school work and everything.

To all of you who have commented/subscribed so far: thank you for making my first ever chaptered story a pleasure to write ^.^ You guys make my life so much brighter and I love you <3