The Pain of Valentines Day
The Pain of Valentines Day
“I hate you”
A unexplainable word comes out from the mouth of Karam as he said this word to the standing figure of Changmin. Unknown to them, an invisible Changmin was watching the whole conversation.
The tall man can see himself staring in his body with Karam .. Arguing. Stupid he was enough, he tried to hold Karam’s hand but he know he can’t. He wants to stop his lover to say those words.
“No baby, you can’t hate me –“
“Then hate me” the tall man was surprised when he heard his own voice saying those words. “I don’t care. You cheat on me right?”
The invisible one wants to kill himself on that moment. Yes, it was dream. His present dream that happen on past and now, he’s coming back to the day when he lost his precious one.
“Bull! I’ve only had you. Why can’t believe me? I ing hate you Shim Changmin!” the young man scowled and earned a smirk from the older man.
“I ing hate you too Park Hyunchul” Enough said. It was enough to make Karam tremble and broke down. The taller man just walked away leaving his lover on his knees.
The invisible Changmin wants to run and catch up with his own body but he can’t. He had to see what happen to Karam after that. ‘What the hell is wrong with you?’ he thought. But the question comes back to him. What the hell is wrong with him that day? Why did he do that?
“I HATE YOU CHANGMIN!” he heard his lover shout but the older man didn’t even glance back and hopped in inside his car. The invisible one tried to comfort his lover although he knew it will not help him to get back his lover in his arms.
“I’ve only had you Changmin. I love only you.”
(Changmin)
“NOOOOOOO!”
I woke up and find myself in our room. Our room, where we usually spend our time talking the things that happen on the certain day until we fell asleep. That dream, it keeps coming back. It makes me realize one thing; I’ve hurt Karam that much.
A soft knock wake me up in my senses. I forgot that I’m living with Yunho-hyung and Jaejoong-hyung lately.
“Changmin, Are you alright?” a bass voice of Yunho-hyung asked me. A heavy feeling sulked inside my heart. Every morning was always like this. They keep checking me out if everything is alright because I keep screaming in my sleep. But my usual answer is “Yes hyung, I’m fine”
Hyung sigh is loud enough for me to think he was still at the door. I can’t blame them since I make them tired every night.
“Come out now. Jaejoong made some breakfast. Hurry up before it gets cold”
(Yunho)
I walked downstairs and find Jaejoong staring at me as he finished preparing the table. I just shook my head and his face fell. He went to the kitchen to prepare the glasses. I pulled out one of the chair and sit there. He placed the glasses on the table and apparently sits down too. The sadness in Jaejoong’s face is quite visible even if he doesn’t tell me.
“I received a text message from Seohyun.” I heard him mumbled. I looked at him and waited for the reason why Changmin’s dongsaeng texted him. “Ahjussi, set up Changmin for another date again. And for the worst part,” he paused a bit and looked at me. “It was Yoona.”
I was about to eat my pancakes when I heard Yoona’s name, I dropped my fork and blink a countless times. “Yoona? Im Yoona? You mean Choi Siwon’s girlfriend?” I asked. Jaejoong weakly nodded and I bummed the table heavily. I was about to pick up my phone in the stall when a pair of hands stop me. “Seohyun told me that she was forced by her family. Siwon knows it too. I’m sure that the two of them will talk about this matter to Changmin.”
I looked at to him and he hesitantly smiled. I know it was hard for all of us to see Changmin in his miserable state but we can’t do anything. Before I can do any move, I saw his tall figure up in the stairs. He drifted his gaze when he knows that I am looking at him. He maybe heard all of our conversation.
He was properly dressed but he keeps fixing his tie, as if trying not to have any eye contact to us. His eyes are obviously worn out but he still tried to hide this with a big grin. “Morning hyungs!”
Jaejoong was stuck in his place, surprised with Changmin’s actions. “How can he pull out a smile after hearing our conversation?” he whispered. I simply gripped his hand and shook my head. I don’t know.
“Let’s eat hyung. You don’t want your maknae to be hungry before he goes to work. Don’t you?”
(3rd Person)
The breakfast is pretty awkward even though Changmin smiles a lot and keep praising his hyung’s cooking. The older two can’t keep their uneasiness in them. When he was finished, Changmin stood up, bid goodbye to his hyung and leave. As soon as he stepped outside, he quickly went to his car before another pool of tears rushed out from his eyes. He can’t believe his own father chose Yoona, his best friend’s girlfriend, to be his wife. Changmin pulled out his phone and immediately dialed Im Yoona’s number.
“I’m sorry oppa.” A soft but hoarsy voice of Yoona welcomed Changmin and he felt bad about it.
“It’s okay. Do you and Siwon have plan? We can’t just do this. I can’t betray anyone.” He asked, aware that the couple might do something about it. He would be gladly to help them.
“After having a lunch with you, take me to the Incheon airport. I’m moving out to Korea with him” The man sighed since he knows it was the only better option for Yoona and Siwon.
“I’ll handle the explanations. Got it? Take care!” Changmin assured her. He can hear the giggle from the other line. He can’t help but to smile. “Thanks Evil oppa”
“Yah! Even though I’m an evil, I still have a heart towards to my friends!”
“Kyaaa” the girl on the other line squealed. “Karam-ssi is so lucky to ha-“. Yoona was taken back of what she said. The man face fell as he heard a soft ‘sorry’ from the other line.
“I was the lucky one but I’ve wasted the chance.” Yoona felt bad about Changmin at that very moment. He clearly states that he can love only one person, and it was Karam.
“Everybody makes a mistake oppa. That’s why there is a second chance. I’m quite sure that Karam has forgiven you already.” A part of Changmin’s heart wants to believe in Yoona’s word but he knew he can’t. He didn’t even have a second chance after all.
“How I wish I could change back everything.”
Flashback
“Happy 5th Anniversary my love, Changmin!”
The older man was surprised not just by his lover who suddenly jumped out to his shoulder but also the surprise that his lover talking about. Earlier that evening, he wanted to take Karam to an exclusive restaurant but the younger man refused. He kept insisting that they can celebrate it at home instead of paying a lot of money, as if he enjoyed it that much.
Out of the sudden, Changmin bear hugged Karam and sway him all around. His tiredness from work was now gone just because of the happy figure of his angel. The younger man struggled not because he wasn’t enjoying but he was already getting dizzy. The tall man let him go and surprised when the man take his hand and dragged him on the dining table. Changmin’s eyes widened as soon as he saw the table which is full of mouth-watering dishes.
“B-babe?”
“Yes?” the angel looked at him blissfully and he can’t help but to smile a lot wider.
“We’re just having our 5th year anniversary. But why does it feel like it was a wedding anniversary?” he teased and Karam can’t help but to blush. ‘Did I prepare too much?’ he asked himself.
Unknown to Karam, the tall man place a little serving to himself, wanted to taste his lover’s cooking. And hell, he loved it! But he decided to tease his angel… just a little bit.
Karam’s face fell when he saw his lover’s face frown as he tasted his food. He quickly takes away the food and walk away. “We should just eat at the restaurant. I’m sorry I couldn’t cook well.” When he was about to throw it away, Changmin take it back, placed it on the table and hugged him instead.
“It was really good baby but you know I can’t say that it’s much better than Jaejoong-hyung’s cooking or else he’ll kill you and I don’t want that to happen.” Changmin mumbled underneath the ear of Karam. The younger one playfully hit the chest of his lover and mouthed ‘Of course, I know that!’
“You are really perfect… to be mine.”
“Pabo, let’s eat.”
“Arasseo yeobo-nim”
~~~~~~~~~~~
The older man insisted that he was the one who can take care of the cleaning just to make Karam rest. Feeling defeated, Karam just agreed it to it and went upstairs to take a shower. When Changmin is done, he decided to take a bath too. So he went upstairs. He looked for his angel but he’s nowhere to be found. ‘Maybe he’s on the balcony’ he thought.
He quickly take a bath and change his clothes into plaid t-shirt and a blue-stripped pajamas. As soon as he stepped out in the bathroom, a gush of cold wind touches his skin. He looked at the way where it was from and found the curtains being blew by the air. He silently walked up to there and saw his angel folding his arms as he inhaled the sweet scent of the air and incredibly y as he wears Changmin’s flannel. The tall man moved closer and snatched his angel by creeping his arms around the slim waist of Karam. The younger man loved the sensation and wished that they can stay like this forever. He can feel his lover is placing light kisses in his nape. He shivered in delight, hoping he wouldn’t stop. The kisses are sending electricity through out his body.
“My flannel was too big for you. Wear it more often, you look good on it.” Changmin whispered in beneath his ears as Karam bit his lips. The younger man turned around and wrapped around his arms to the neck of Changmin. He glued his forehead to the older one and smiled.
“I love you Min. I hope we can be like this forever. Will you promise?”
The older man giggles and starts kissing the younger man’s forehead. “I..” he paused and kissed Karam’s doe-eyes. “Shim Changmin…” he paused again, lips supple on the nose of Karam. “Promise to love Park Hyunchul forever and ever. Will you promise to stay by my side through thick and thin?” and now it was older man’s time to ask. Karam sweetly smiled and give a peck on the teasing lips of his lover.
“Of course I will. I love you so much that I can do impossible things possible.” Feeling delightful enough, Changmin slowly approached his lover’s face to take those lips as his and then they shared a passionate kiss under the moonlight.
End of Flashback
Inside an exclusive restaurant, Changmin along with his father is now meeting the Im’s family. He can sense the awkward feeling from Yoona and he just sighed ‘Why Dad is getting plastic around? How can these people let their children marry someone who they didn’t want?’ he asked himself eyeing every single detail that was happening in his surrounding.
When the lunch was done, Changmin quickly informed Siwon by texting that it was time to make the move. He asked permission to Mr. and Mrs. Im if he can take Yoona out and they dumbly agreed. They quickly leave as much as possible because they can’t make Siwon wait in the airport.
“Thanks Changmin-oppa. We owe you so much.” The petite woman hugged Changmin, making the man smile in relief. “Thanks man, really.” A tapped from Siwon and a hug make the taller man chuckled a little bit. “Hope you find your happiness.”
The couple holds hand and bow in front of him, telling how thankful they are that Changmin was there to help them in the time of need. “Take care of Yoona, hyung. Or else I’ll skin you alive.” He threatened them, making them laugh in unison.
Yoona and Siwon bid goodbye and ready to board the plane. They walked a way happily, leaving Changmin standing all alone. When the couple was nowhere in sight, the man decide to leave and think deeply. ‘What happen to us Karam?’
--------
Changmin went to the Im residence since he promised to Yoona that he’ll handle the explanations. At first they were furiously mad and he quiet expected this but he managed to convince them. “Don’t you want your daughter to find her happiness? If you want her to marry me, she’ll never ever experience happiness but a sorrow because I can’t bring up myself to love anyone beside Karam.”
--------
“Care to explain why you let Yoona run off with Siwon?”
The man heard his father’s voice as he entered his office. He was really mad, very mad but he knows that it was right. Right for him, right for Yoona, and for Siwon.
“She wants him not me, Appuji. You can’t force us to marry each other. I’ve already talked about this with Mr. and Mrs. Im so you don’t have any reason to get furious.” He boldly stated to his dad, not minding if it hurts his father’s pride or not.
The old man just sighed, knowing that his son can’t get over about his past love. “Changmin, Karam is not coming back. Get a life son. There is nothing that stay constant he –“
“I know that.” The man cut his father off. Those words are enough to hurt his heart once again. “I know that but I can’t bring myself to. Karam will always be the one who owns my heart.”
-------
Every night, he was still haunted by the same nightmare. Yunho and Jaejoong, who can hear the younger man’s scream every night, can’t do anything but listen only.
Flashback
It was Sunday morning and the couple is just cuddling playfully in the couch, enjoying the whole day rest.
“Changmin-ah” the younger man mumbled. Changmin’s whose head is resting in his lover’s lap looked at him and smiled “hmm?”
“Can’t you believe it?” he bubbly asked. “In the next 2 months, we’re already 10 years!” he happily exclaimed. The older man chuckled over his lover’s childish acts and finds it cute. Without having any word, the older man pulled Karam for a fast kiss, making the younger man blushed. “I love you”
3 weeks left before their anniversary was worst thing that happened between the two of them. Suhoon, Karam’s cousin went to Seoul to visit him. They are very clingy to each other since they used to live together, which make Changmin jealous. The older man wanted to believe in his lover’s word, but he unexplainable can’t, to the reason that Karam has never told any single thing about his cousin for past years. He was surprised when he happened to went in a restaurant, and saw Suhoon hugging Karam like there is no tomorrow. Unknown to him, Suhoon was only bidding goodbye to Karam since he knew it will take a long time before they can cross each other again.
------
“Changmin –“
“I don’t want to hear your lame lies, Hyunchul” the older man cut him off. The anger in his body was rising up for him to listen.
“I hate you” at that moment, Karam wanted to take those words back. He didn’t mean those words. He doesn’t know why it came out from his stupid mouth.
“Then hate me.” He frankly told to the younger man, leaving him dumbfounded. “I don’t care. You cheat on me right?” Those words stabbed the heart of Karam knowing that Changmin doesn’t trust him.
“Bull! I’ve only had you. Why can’t believe me? I ing hate you Shim Changmin!” although he doesn’t want to say those words, he can’t stop himself. He has to be heard too. ‘Why he doesn’t trust me?’
Changmin just smirked making Karam shake nervously. He knew he can’t handle the pain anymore. And he wants it to stop now.”I ing hate you too, Park Hyunchu.l” Karam trembled and broke down. The older man didn’t dare to look at him so he shouted as much as he can.
“I HATE YOU CHANGMIN!”
Unknown to Karam, tears are rushing out from Changmin’s eyes as soon as he turned his back to him. He was not too naïve not to hear the rants of his lover and it just shattered his heart into pieces. But he chooses not to look back. He has hurt his angel so much. He quickly hoped in to the car, pulled out his mobile phone and called.
“Yoochun-hyung, can you please meet me?”
------
Although he fined it hard to go back, Karam went back to his house, expecting Changmin must be there. When he stepped inside, he cried even more. ‘It’s time for me to move out.’ He thought.
End of flashback
“AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”
Yunho and Jaejoong woke up in a sudden scream that bewildered the whole house. “This is different from the other nightmares of him.” Jaejoong hissed as jumped out from the bed and been followed by Yunho.
They were lucky enough that the younger man left his door unlocked so they can get inside without having a hard time. As they entered, the saw the younger man struggling in his sleep and crying hysterically. Quickly, Yunho went to him and save him from the nightmare.
The man slowly opened his eyes and find that he was just dreaming. He cried even more as he remembers that it really happen to him. “I – I s-saw how did t-they kill h-him.” He stuttered making Jaejoong hug him out of the blue.
It was pity to see Changmin like this in the eyes of his hyungs. They know that they can’t turn back the time and make him bubbly as he was before. A mood maker just like Junsu, but it was quite impossible now, because he was preoccupied by the sadness, guilt and despair.
----
“Yoboseyo?”
“Jaejoong-hyung, how was Changmin-ah?” the face of him fell when Junsu asked him about their maknae. He doesn’t know how he will explain how he is now.
“Worst” is the only comes out from his mouth. With this word, Yoochun and Junsu who is in the other lines, seems to understand.
“In the next 2 weeks, it was already Valentines day. What are we going to do?” Yoochun asked knowing that, that day is nearly approaching.
“I don’t know Chun and Su” the older man let out a long breath. “But I’m sure, in the next 2 weeks. We have to keep track on his sleep.”
Flashback:
A knock surprised Junsu since Yoochun leave a couple minutes ago. He quickly runs to the door, thinking maybe his ‘Chunnie’ left something but surprised when he saw Karam, eyes are so red and tears stains on his face. “What happen? Get inside. Quick!”
----
The younger man told Junsu what happen and cried even more. He also asked if he can stay at his house for a mean time until he can fix everything about them and bubbly man quickly agreed, promising not to tell anything to Changmin.
Knowing that Yoochun is with Changmin right now, he texted him right away informing that Karam will be staying with them for a week or more and don’t dare telling it to the maknae.
---------
The dandy boy sighed as he watched their maknae getting drunk. “I love him. Am I not enough for him? Why did he cheat on me?” he keeps asking his hyung but Yoochun can only listen. When he asked for another bottle of vodka for the 10th time, Changmin was stopped by the older man.
“For being together for 9 years, do you think he has the heart to do that? You didn’t even listen to him Min, you really didn’t.”
--------
The tall man quickly went home in the thought that Karam might be waiting for him and he can’t let that happen since it was already Mornight. His mind was occupied of ‘What is he going to do to make Karam forgive him?’ Darkness filled the eyes of Changmin as he opened the door. It was awfully quite and something is really wrong. Uneasiness covered his heart when he ran upstairs wishing that his lover didn’t leave him.
He opened the door of their room and saw no one lying on the bed. The heart beat of Changmin is getting faster and faster as his eyes continually looking for his angel until a piece of paper on the top of their stall caught his eyes.
Changmin-ah,
Mianhae. Please don’t look for me. I have to clear out my mind. Things are getting worst between the two of us and I don’t know whether it is yours or my fault but I’m not blaming you for everything. I love you. Only you but for a mean time, I need some space.
Karam
End of Flashback
“Does he eat enough?” Seohyun asked his Oppa’s chingu but the older man gently shook his head. The innocent girl nodded, expecting this to happen. How can you do your daily routine when one of the people which are part of your life is eternally gone?
“Maybe I should let Kyuhyun-oppa visit him. He needs to get checked up with a psychiatrist.” She woefully stated, that makes Jaejoong enraged on what he heard.
“That doesn’t make sense Seohyun. I know that Kyuhyun is a good psychiatrist but do you really want to do this to your brother? Yes, your brother is quite insane but that doesn’t mean that he really become a retarded person. He was just depressed, Seohyun. He was just depressed about the fact that he loses Karam right in front of his eyes!”
Flashback:
The three weeks separation was pretty hard for both of them. They were like a dead people and no one can talk to them properly. Yunho, as a CEO of the company, take over all of the meeting of Changmin, which is the vice president, since he was not in himself.
“Yaah. Get a life!” Yunho exclaimed when he saw Changmin, laying his head on his desk while looking at the picture of him and Karam. The tall man just looked at his hyung and sighed. “I want to, but Karam is my life and –“
“Then do something” the older man cut him off. “Do something that will make the two of you to be together again.”
------------
“KARAM-HYUNGGGGGGGGGGGGG!”
Karam woke up in his senses and find Jay, his colleague, frowning in disappointment. They we’re in Bul Pae cafe, a coffee shop where he and Changmin usually spend their free time talking.
“Are you listening to me?” the younger one asked angrily knowing that he was talking to the thin air for almost 45 minutes. The problematic one shyly shook his head bowed down. The younger man sighed and ruffled his hyung’s head. “Three weeks is enough hyung. Go talk to him and make things work out. Tomorrow is Valentines Day. Make something memorable.”
-----------------
Two people are walking back and forth in the certain place. Both of them are thinking if they should be the one to make a move so the gap between them will be lesser. Since Changmin is not fan of waiting, he decided to make the move now.
The younger man jumped, startled when he felt his phone vibrated. And then, his eyes start to build up tears when he saw the Caller’s ID.
“Yoboseyo?”
“Hey.”
“Hi.”Karam weakly replied because he knows, any moment from now, he’ll start crying.
“How are you?” Changmin asked, wanting to know everything that happen in the midst of their short break up.
“I’m good? I guess not. Errrr. How about you?” The younger man childishly murmured making his lover chuckle. Out of the sudden, tears rolls down in his porcelain cheeks. And slowly he’s sobs are being heard by the weary man on the other line.
“Don’t cry.” Changmin mumbled. He cannot bear to hear his lover cry because of him. On that time, he wants to run to his lover’s office and hug the man with all of his might. “I’m sorry.”
With those words, Karam cried even more. Not because he was still hurt by Changmin, but he was happy that he was going to have his man again. He can cuddle him, hug him nor kiss him again.
“I miss you. Come back to me my angel. Let’s start all over again, with you and me only in our own world.”
Karam cannot suppress the happiness he was feeling right now. All he wants is to go back to their house and place himself in Changmin’s arms.
“Changmin-ah.”
“Baby?”
“I love you”
“I love you too…so much”
End of Flashback
Inside the Bul Pae café, four men are awkwardly looking at their drinks. The quietness filled with them since they don’t know how to start this conversation. As they looked outside, the scent of romance is everywhere. Of course, this is the season of romance, it’s nearly Valentines Day. And they can’t help but to be sad on that fact. The Valentines is near approaching.
“Two days to go before Valentines, hyung.” A high-pitched voice broke the ice making everyone looked at him. Junsu starred as he stirred his Espresso and take a sip of it. “What are we going to do?”
Yunho moved his gaze to the man beside as he saw him looking at him too. He already knew his answer and he’s willing to do the same. “I’m going to stay behind Changmin. This is the cruelest moment for him so I have to look for him.”
Everyone looked woefully to Jaejoong and nodded. Their maknae is so broke now and they knew that Valentines Day is a bitter-sweet moment in Changmin’s life…forever.
Flashback:
“Are you serious, Changmin? You are really the man. I should be asking you for that things.” The dandy boy is so proud when the younger man told him that he wants to ask Karam for marriage tonight. He was unpredictable, as always. The taller man rolled out his eyes and walked away, looking for the best ring that will suit in his lover’s taste.
“Do you think it’ll work out? He might reject you” Yoochun playfully teased the maknae and received a punch from him.
“I’m freaking nervous here. Don’t joke around.”
--------
Karam rolled his eyes when Changmin told him that he’s going to pick him up for the 5th time. The man doesn’t allow him to walk all by himself in Namsam tower and Karam wants to prove that he dependent enough to take care of himself.
“Karam, I’ll pic –“
“Don’t pick me up or I’ll not show up? Just simply choose one Min.” he cut off his lover as he provoke him, leaving Changmin allow him. The man himself, knew that he can’t win any normal arguments with Karam.
“Alright alright.”
----------
The younger colleague looked at his hyung dumbfounded. ‘Karam-hyung is really out of his mind’ he thought and sighed. And suddenly, his hyung dragged him out of the office, leaving him curious. “What do you think are you doing? We still have a lot of works to do!” he complained but Karam just ignored it and smile even wider.
“I need accompany. I’m going to compile the memories of me and Changmin and give it to him as a gift for him to remember. I seriously need your opinion for that.”
-------------
All of them are in Namsam Tower already but Karam is still not there. The taller man can’t stay in one place; he keeps walking back and forth or checking up his watch.
“Awwww. Minnie is so nervous.” Jaejoong happily stated. He was fascinated on how the younger man keep asking how he looked or etc.
Seohyung went in between out of the blue and hugged her oppa so tight. “Goodluck oppa. Appa send his regards since he can’t go. You know Athritis kills him.” She joke making Changmin hit the back of her head.
*A text from your baby, Changmin-ah*
Everyone drifted their eyes to Changmin confusedly. Making the taller man blushed. This ringing tone was recorded by Karam itself but they rarely heard it because he tends to call Karam the most.
“We didn’t know you are kinda mushy Changmin. Nice ringing tone.” As Yunho compliment his message tone, everyone laugh.
From: Angel Karam
I’ll just get some things from Junsu-hyung’s house.
“What did he say?” Junsu asked excitedly. He wants to see everything right in front of his eyes now.
“He said that he’s going to get something over your house.”
Yoochun widened his eyes and dragged Yunho and Channgmin out of the blue. The two men were confused of what’s wrong with him. “We have to go.”
“Why? In any minute, Karam will be here. I shouldn’t was –“
“He’s going to take the dark alley which is the shortcut road through our house. I don’t trust that place. For the three weeks that Karam lived with us, I noticed that a couple of men or somewhat like gangsters are following. The men change everyday but they are wearing the same clother” the dandy boy told them as he get in the car until he notice the two was still outside, dumbfounded. “Hop in before it gets too late.”
--------------
The petite man is walking happily but then the happiness on his face fell. The men who are following for three weeks are behind him again. He tried to calm himself and by thinking that he needs to hurry up because Changmin is waiting for him.
As he walked, he saw that the numbers of men following are growing larger and he can’t help but to get nervous. He tried to walk as fast as he can but he knows that the men will managed to capture him. He held the photobook tighter. It was the only he can leave for Changmin. He pulled out his phone and dialed Changmin’s number.
‘Please answer Min’ he desperately thought.
“Yah. Karam. Wait for us and –“
“I love you.” He mumbled as he cut off Changmin. The taller man who is beside to Yoochun who is driving looked at to his hyung, sending shiver in their spines.
“Baby, what’s wrong? What’s going on? Where are –“
“I just want you to know that I love you for all of my life. I was blessed to have you. You gave the happiness that I was longing when I lost my parents. Thank you and I will treasure forever.” When saying those words, Karam’s tears fell. He was already surrounded by this group of men. In fact, he knows them. He’ll never able to forget those faces. It was the gang who took away the lives of his parents.
“Karam stay where you are. We’re about to go there so please stay there.” Changmin is panicking, pleading his hyung to go faster. He can sense that his lover is now in the midst of danger.
“I love you.” and with those last words, a man came up to Karam and dragged him, not able to turn off his phone, making Changmin hear all of the rants and voices.
“What the hell do you want from me Soo Man-ssi?” he asked as he struggle to the hold of a man to him and looked to the person who is standing in front of him. The old man smirked and trace the jaw line of Karam, making the younger man disgusted.
“Two lifes are not enough for my cravings and I want it to be three. Since you are their child, I want you to meet them as soon as possible but I decided to play with you for a mean time.” And the man suddenly bit Karam’s neck making the boy winced in pain.
“Nooo!”
----------------
“Karam! Karam!” Changmin kept screaming over the phone making his hyungs worried about what’s going on. Both Yunho and Yoochun decided to call the people who left in the Namsam Tower and told them that there is something wrong happening to Karam.
“Noooooooo!” the three of heard and stunned about what’s going on. Yoochun fasten his pace as if he can fly any time right now.
“Karam! Who the hell are they?” the taller man kept asking. He was practically scared about what’s happening about his lover but all he can hear was the conversation on the other line.
“Don’t touch me.”
The anger in Changmin has rise up. He can’t let any man touch his angel and only he can touch Karam.
Soo Man was busy checking out the younger Park’s body until he saw a small light not far away from Karam’s hands. He came closer and saw that it was a phone and someone is on the other line.
“You must be Changmin? Don’t you mind us playing with your ‘baby’ here?” the old man chuckled. He knows Changmin. For almost 5 years that he was looking for the son of the Park, he managed to check the background of the guy that Karam is hanging out with.
“Don’t ever lay a hand on him. Who are you?” Changmin scowled. But Soo Man on the other line just smirked and Karam’s neck.
“It’s too late Shim Changmin. Say goodbye to you little kitten here.” The man placed the phone right next to Karam and forced him to talk.
“Changmin-ah…” he weakly murmured, enough to break Changmin’s heart. The taller man’s eyes started to get watery. Same with the younger man, he let go of his tears.
“Baby, hold on –“
“Listen to me Min.” he paused a bit, clearing his throat up. He knows what he’s going to say will hurt him and Changmin, but he have to. “I want you to be happy. If having someone else is necessary, go on. I won’t be mad. You know I won’t. You deserve to be happy for the rest of your life. Just always remember, I’ve always love you Shim Changmin, and that would be forever.” He cried and tossed away the phone.
Out of his senses, a winced of too much pain was heard by Changmin. A sound of metal make the taller man come back to his senses and find Karam was already getting beaten up. It sounds like they are mercilessly beating up the fragile man, making Changmin can’t do anything but screamed on the top of his lungs telling to let go of his angel.
Yoochun’s car entered the alley. All of the while, they heard a 2 gun shots. Without any hesitations, Changmin went out of the car and followed by Yunho and Changmin. His mind is only occupied of ‘Save your angel, Changmin. Save him’
The tall man ran as fast as he can, wanting to beat up the man whom he just talked to on the other line. In the middle of the road, he heard men whispering and running away. “We’ve already got what we want. Leave Hyunchul there. There’s a man approaching.”
When he heard his lover’s name, he quickly ran and saw someone endlessly kicking a hopeless man. Changmin was stunned when he saw who the man is lying down in the road, covered with blood and being kicked by a million times of a stranger.
The next thing he knew, Yunho is already beating up the guy left along with Yoochun. Changmin is trying to regain his strength to pick up his lover to the ground. As he picked him up, he carried him and put him inside the car.
The tall man was desperately crying, waking up his lover in his unconsciousness. The young man in the arms of Changmin hardly tried to open his eyes for his lover, for the last time. He wanted see his lover’s face. He looked at the frustrated face of his lover and he thinks it was cute. He tried to smile but failed, he coughs a lot of blood. And then he felt a person went inside the car and drove off.
The car was flying, since it was really fast. Changmin keeps nagging Yoochun to go faster. They need to save Karam. Although the pain was too much, Karam thought that the pain was bearable as long he was on Changmin’s arms. Slowly, his hand’s creeped in the face of Changmin. The blood in Karam’s hand has been scattering on the face of Changmin, ruining his handsomeness. With this movement, Changmin hugged Karam even more, not wanting to let go. The weak man looked in deeply in the eyes of Changmin and smiled.
“Changmin-ah…sing for me.”
The tall man was surprised of his lover’s request. He doesn’t want to, he know he can’t. How can he sing if his lover is dying right front in his eyes?
Changmin shook his head and the younger man obviously tried to pout but it was hard for him. He can’t act what he wants anymore because the pain is killing him. But suddenly he heard a hum, making Yunho and Yoochun also looked surprised.
Toki wo tomete zutto kimi no sobani itai
Miageta sora negai komete
Hitotsu hitotsu kagayaku hoshi tsunage nagara
Kimi no katachi sagaeta
Tears won’t stop coming out from Changmin’s eyes. He can’t hold on although he was singing. He wants to stop, to become stronger for his dying love but he can’t. And now, the pain was already unbearable for Karam. To the point that it’s hard for him breathe anymore.
Toki wo tomete zutto kimi no sobani itai
Motto kimi wo dakishimetai
Hitotsu –
“Changmin-ah.” Karam knew he can’t stay any longer. Even though he wants to stay alive, he can’t anymore. The sudden lightness of the weight of his lover can be felt by Changmin. He knew that his lover has to go but he refused to hold him out and hugged him more tightly.
“We’re about to get in the hospital angel. Please don’t do this. Breathe for me.” The taller man cried, begging his lover to stay with him but the Karam’s hand fell. He coped out with a smile and tried to talk.
“Advance Happy Valentines Day.” He paused a bit, gaining his strength to continue his words. “And advance Happy 10th Anniversary”
Changmin shook his head doesn’t want to lineated in his mind that his lover has to go now. He cried hysterically, making his hyung weep as they looked in the mirror. “You can’t. You promised to stay beside me forever. D-don’t leave me Karam, I c-can’t –“
“Saranghae.”
With that last word, Karam is eternally gone, leaving Changmin shattered into pieces. The tall man traced every corner of his lover’s face and kissed it. Thinking maybe there’s a miracle will happen and will wake up.
-------------
The doctor and nurses are panicking inside the hospital since Yunho and Yoochun can’t tame Changmin for acting like a pedo while carrying Karam. The nurses carried out the stretcher and make the taller man place the bloodied body of Karam into it. The doctor let Changmin stay by the side of Karam so no scene is going to happen. The doctor held up the wrist of Karam to check his pulse but he’s face fell and look unhopeful.
An unexpected vibration of phone was felt by Changmin. Although he knows it was unnecessary to look at it now but he does. Suddenly, he felt down and cried.
“Time of death: 12:00 am. February 14, 2021”
End of Flashback
Rays of sunlight vast in his face and burnt his hair, indicating it was already morning. He slowly opened his eyes and a river of tears fall from his eyes. ‘‘I must been crying all night.’’ He murmured to himself. Even if he’s not feeling well, he tried his best to get up from the bed, wanting to go to the bathroom to wash his face. When he was about to stand up, a purple vivid photobook caught his eyes.
Flashback
“We found this in the middle of the road.” The police officer said and leaves. Changmin was too naïve to notice everyone so it was Jaejoong who took it from the police.”
End of flashback
Slowly, the man reached for the photobook. It’s been with him for a long time but he never got a chance to take a look at it. He’s hand were crazily shaking, leaving him curious about why is he nervously shaking. When he opened it, the pain overflowed in his eyes.
My dear Changmin,
You never knew how happy I am for 10 years and it was all thanks to you. I wish we could stay like this forever. How about for 100 years? I love you. Happy 10th anniversary.
The taller man flipped to the next pages and saw the pictures of him and Karam along with his hyungs. It was their college days and he just met his angel that time. As he continued looking every page, he’ll shed tears. Indeed all of their memories are compiled in the photobook. Their first date, first monthsary, different events, even if it’s just simple moments like sleeping or drinking milk.
The pain of Changmin scorched his heart evenly. He needs his Karam back, back to his arms again. He wants to celebrate 100 more anniversaries with him. He wants to hug him, kiss him, , carry him and sway him all around when he was happy. He simply wants his everything back. The pain stabs his heart a million times.
Although the floor is cold as ice, he laid there and cried all of his heart. All of their memories are flashing back to his mind, the sweet smile, authentic laugh, and all of Karam’s perfection. He wants take to him to his side again.
“KARAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!” he screamed over his lungs. In the thought that his lover might hear him in the sounds of the wind, since the younger man promised that he would stay beside him forever.
“Come back. I love you so much that I cannot let go.” He pleads facing the sky through the open balcony but the air just blew stronger towards to him and make him cry even more. “I know you can hear me. I want you back baby. I want you stay by my side forever.”
Jaejoong and the rest gushed inside the room of Changmin and find him crying hysterically. Jaejoong and Junsu run to the maknae and hug him, trying their best to ease the pain that Changmin is enduring. Yoochun and Yunho left standing tried to approach Changmin and the other two. They have to stay stronger for them, for Changmin. So they tried to hold back their tears as much as possible.
“Changmin-ah.” A dolphin-voice whined over. He never expected Changmin to be this fragile. After of what happen, the bully maknae, the bubbly maknae, the smart maknae, and the evil maknae is now gone. They can’t see the snarky side of Changmin anymore but broke and dead was now in front of them, crying.
Out of the sudden, a phone was ringing, bewildered the silence inside the room, making Changmin cried even more. It was his phone, placed beside the vivid photobook. Yunho took a glance of it and saw it was a alarm reminder of Changmin. A reminder that will broke his heart from now on.
February 14, 2022
Valentines Day, Our 11th anniversary….1st death anniversary of my angel.
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