“It’s getting worse isn’t it?”

“Hush, don’t say that!”

“Why are we avoiding the inevitable? We both know that we should prepare for the worst!”

Gayoon gulped and squeezed her eyes shut, trying to tune out the conversation between her father and Park Soo-Min, her stepmother. She opened them again when she heard footsteps approaching from behind her.

“H..Hey Unnie..” a small voice said and Gayoon could just imagine the frightened look on her stepsister’s face. She sat up straight in her seat and mumbled a reply. She heard some movement and was surprised that Chorong settled herself beside her. She was wearing a plain cotton shirt and a pair of plaid pattern pajama pants. Gayoon had given it to her when Chorong and their mother had moved into the apartment and the girl had forgotten to pack any sleepwear. Gayoon had planned to loan the pajama pants to her but she decided the girl can have it.

“I didn’t have time to change” Chorong muttered, as if she was reading Gayoon’s mind. Gayoon’s eyes flickered over to the potted plant at the corner of the waiting area when she realized she was staring fixedly at Chorong’s pants.

“You look fine” Gayoon told her. She took a deep breath, wishing the doctor would appear anytime now and report to them about the current status of their grandfather. Well, Gayoon’s grandfather. Not Chorong’s. She and her mother have got nothing to do with Heo Doo-hwan, the seventy-two year old man who had been diagnosed with diabetes and heart complications for the past eight years. Though he was as fit as a fiddle when he was living with diabetes, his health started deteriorating when he started developing chest pains and difficulty in breathing. It was in early 2011 that Doo-hwan had to be admitted to the hospital a few times. Tonight was his fourth time being admitted after he complained of acute cramps and pains. Only this time, it seemed much worse. The troubled expression on her father’s face was more than enough to let Gayoon know that they had to prepare for the worst when she had reached the hospital.

“How was the date?” Chorong suddenly asked her voice still soft and barely audible. A muscle twitched in Gayoon’s jaw and she shifted in her seat. Her eyes darted quickly to Chorong who was staring at her manicured nails. The girl loves anything to do with the color red or pink and this week she had painted her nails in red shimmer polish. No interesting nail art this time which Gayoon thought her stepsister was pretty good at it.

“No fancy designs for the nails this time?” Gayoon asked instead and Chorong glanced up sharply, her eyes wide, probably surprised that her elder stepsister actually notices them.

“Uh..um..n..no. I wasn’t in the mood” Chorong replied, balling her hands into tight fists.

“Oh, I see” Gayoon said. “But I like that color though” she added good-naturedly.

Chorong nodded and tilted her head slightly to face Gayoon, a small hesitant smile playing on her lips. “I’m guessing your date didn’t go so well?” she guessed, probably taking the hint on Gayoon’s sudden switch of subject. Gayoon simply shrugged. She was not in the mood to talk about it yet but it would be impolite to not answer Chorong’s question.

“Maybe all the good guys are taken. Or maybe I’m being too picky” Gayoon replied, staring straight ahead at the lift lobby across. Nurses and doctors rushed in and out, talking in hurried voices as they rushed to the ER or operating rooms to save someone’s lives. Gayoon glanced back at her father who was now standing alone and staring into space. Forty-four year old Heo Youngji gave her daughter a sad smile when he noticed his daughter was watching him. They both know what was to expect.

“Drink something” Soo-Min suddenly appeared beside Gayoon, holding out two bottles of Evian. She took it without saying a word and passed the other bottle to Chorong. She gratefully took it and attempted to unscrew the cap but it would not budge. Gayoon held out her hand, offering to help and Chorong passed it back with a sheepish grin. “I’m never good at those” she said.

Gayoon unscrewed it at the first try while Soo-Min tittered softly at her daughter. “Isn’t it time you build up those muscles instead of hiding your nose behind those books?” she asked, taking a seat beside Gayoon. She could feel her dismay settling in when she realized that she had to associate herself with the Park family this very moment. She was never good at doing that. She was never good at having a decent conversation with them ever since her father decides to remarry and Gayoon was against the idea. Her mother was not gone for a year and he had already found a replacement, much to Gayoon’s horror.

Now, happily married with Park Soo-Min for almost two years and with Chorong from her previous marriage, Gayoon was still not comfortable with having them around. Simply put, she was still not accepting them in her life. And both mother and daughter know about it but they tried to look past Gayoon’s bitterness and live life normally. Gayoon had wanted to move out of the apartment after receiving her Degree but her father had forbid her from doing that. He knows Gayoon was still upset with his decision but he had told her he was not going to lose any family member. Gayoon had decided to stay put in their four-bedroom apartment despite the many conflicting thoughts.

“You girls can head home if you want to” Soo-Min was saying when Chorong was fighting back a yawn. Chorong shook her head and so did Gayoon. “I want to stay” Chorong told her mother.

“But it’s getting late and you have to work tomorrow” Soo-Min pointed out, tapping Gayoon’s knee.

“I can request for emergency leave” Gayoon said, frowning a little at Soo-Min’s hand but the woman did not seemed to notice. This situation was sending her some discomfort. She was not into some mother-daughter bonding moment. All she wants to do is to be with her grandfather and listen to him telling her that everything will be alright. That he was not going to leave them and that his heart complications were just foul play. That he was just pulling their leg all these years because everyone knows he’s a prankster.

“Oh Gayoon!” Soo-Min cried out when tears started streaming down Gayoon’s face. She hastily wiped the tears away with the back of her hand. “Gayoon ah--“

Gayoon stood up abruptly and excused herself to the washroom. She ignored Soo-Min calling out to her as she marched down the corridor, her eyes searching for an exit. It seems like she’s doing a lot of running away from awkward situations for tonight. But she could not help it though. It’s the best solution to everything. Even if it means hurting people along the way.

She finally found the Ladies after turning into a corner and gratefully stepped in, letting out a loud sigh and headed straight to the sink. She stared at her reflection in the mirror, her face scrunching up in displeased. There was a faint trail of mascara already running down her right cheek.

Gayoon rummaged through her clutch and took out her emergency make-up wipes. She always bring them whenever she goes, in cases like this. As she carefully removed the gunk of mascara and eye shadow from her eyes, the earlier scene flashed in her mind. She felt the tears threatening to spill out again as she balled up the wet wipes in her hand. She could not recall the last time she had ever cried in front of anyone and to think she did it in front of them. Those people who does not deserve to be part of her family. Gayoon stared down at the crumpled wet wipes, the white cloth already stained with streaks of blacks. She fumbled for the rest of the wet wipes from its pack and proceeded to wipe her face clean from whatever product she had applied for the date. It had all been a useless effort to make herself look pretty for tonight. She then let loose of her dark waves that had been in a neat bun braid which she had painstakingly took two hours to get it right. It was not an easy chore for her to style it up since her crowning glory has a penchant to be stubborn and annoying.

Ji-hyun had mentioned that Gayoon should really start dressing up properly for her date this time, as compared to the previous ones. Gayoon did not see the problem in throwing on a pair of blazer over a cute dress or a patterned blouse with a pair of dark jeans. What matters most is to actually turn up for the date and look presentable right? At the end of the day, all those heavy makeup will be scrubbed free and her skin can breathe once again.

Gayoon  untangled her hair carefully from the braid and let them loose while she raked her fingers through it. Her hair felt surprisingly soft against her skin, something she was proud of for taking the time to pay attention to her hair and giving it the TLC it needs. Same goes to her outfit, which was a simple yet elegant cocktail length dress. Gayoon had chose it in a bold dahlia color, a rare choice for her but since G.Na had listed down a few promising traits of this Tae-Hee person, Gayoon felt that it does not hurt be more meticulous in her dressing.

“If only I knew what I was getting myself into” Gayoon muttered to her reflection, relief to finally let her skin and hair breath. She splashed cold water onto her face, relishing the fresh sense tingling in her skin when she heard the door swung opened. Thinking it was just a regular person, Gayoon continued running the water on her face a few times before dabbing it dry with a paper napkin. Her heart skipped in when she saw Chorong standing beside her with a forlorn expression.

“Gwenchana?” Chorong asked instead. “You were in here for quite some time, I thought—“

“I’m fine” Gayoon said, rearranging her stuff back into the clutch and storming past Chorong. Her stepsister followed suit, trying to fall in step with Gayoon’s long stride back to the waiting area.

“Why are you being like this?” Chorong suddenly blurted out causing Gayoon to stop in her tracks. “Why are you being like this? We’re family and we’re supposed to stick together. Why do you keep pushing me away? I’m your sis—

“You’re not my sister!” Gayoon snapped her voice a mixture of anguish and grief. Disappointment and fright flashed across Chorong’s voice, as if she could not believe what Gayoon had said. “M..Mwoh?” Chorong whispered, her hands clasped together to her chest, her eyes wide with confusion. Her breathing had turned heavy and Gayoon could see the younger girl was shaking from her heated response. Chorong bit her lower lips to stop them from quivering.

“I don’t mean…” Gayoon started out but her words got caught in when the painful bile started to form again. But no, she was not going to cry again this time. Not here. Not ever. But Chorong only gave a few slow nods, her eyes glistening with tears. “I know what you mean. But I know…but I know you don’t meant what you say. I just..caught you at a bad timing…m…mianhe” she stammered before running off. Gayoon saw the tears spilling down Chorong’s pale cheeks before she turned to the corner back to the waiting area.

Gayoon bit her inner cheek as she paced back and forth along the hallway. Now what have she done? She really did not mean to hurt Chorong’s feelings. Sure she did not feel that way towards Chorong and the girl knows that too. But to let Chorong hear what she dreads the most, now that’s just the icing on the cake isn’t it? In a way, it looks like Gayoon had finally let out what she had wanted to say when the Park family first entered her life.

Gayoon stopped pacing, her body trembling from the anger, the confusion—it was too much for her to handle in one night! She has to apologize to Chorong, whether she likes it or not.

Gayoon walked back to the waiting area, feeling like her heart was going to burst out of her chest, and her head throbbing from the million disconcerting thoughts. She spotted Chorong sitting with her head in her hands, sobbing softly to herself. Gayoon search for Soo-Min but the woman was nowhere to be found.

Gayoon took a deep breath, willing her feet to walk up to Chorong, but her mind was blank and mouth was dry, unsure of what to say to the young girl. She was nearing her stepsister when she was distracted with a few voices on her right. The voices were hushed and low and Gayoon picked up the urgency in them. She turned her head to where and who they belong to and saw her father talking to a distraught looking elderly man. He had his arms crossed and kept shaking his head, his face so close to crying. Gayoon wondered who that man was as she took a seat beside Chorong She was about to open and console her step sister when another man appeared from the hallway, rushing straight to her father and the elderly man.

And in that moment, Gayoon felt an unusual flip at the pit of her stomach since she actually recognized who the man was.