A short note before you read this: Honestly, I have no idea what I’m trying to convey here. I just wrote and I knew that’s where it should end. There will be another note after you’ve read this.

Jessica is lying on the bed with her head slightly raised in a pillow. She's reading a book when she heard her door open. She did not stir from the sudden disturbance, having it guessed that it's Yoona who is probably gonna be pulling another annoying dongsaeng act on her. It's cute but it's cringing. And if she's gonna mind it, Yoona will only overdo it.

Yoona jumped onto the bed, causing Jessica to bounce a little and could only sigh her exasperation. She moved closer to her unnie and just lied there for a minute without creating noise or gestures of annoyance such as poking and pinching.

Her silence is getting even stranger for Jessica. Yoona is not the silent type whenever they're all together especially when she's with Jessica. She's usually the loud one, trailing just a step behind Tiffany and Sooyoung and the mood-maker along with Hyoyeon.

"How is today?" She asked, unable to contain the gnawing worry for Yoona.

She took Jessica's free hand and played with her fingers. "Not much happened. Except for one thing"

"Hmm?"

There's a long pause that Jessica found very weirdl. Then she heard Yoona deep breath intake like she’s garnering her guts which Jessica doesn't know what for.

"Yoona?"

"Seunggi oppa and I broke up"

It's like a glass was hit by a stone and shattered right in front of her. For a second there, she felt her voice was locked up in . Her fingers that held her book clenched on it, almost creasing the edges of a few pages. She processed the thought in her head once again, finally closing her book and pondered that maybe she heard it wrong.

"You.....you broke up?" She stuttered. Her eyes fell a bit on her hand in possession of Yoona's, wanting to retrieve it but failed. Yoona is one heck of a keeper of her hand and it happens every time.

"Yeah" Yoona affirmed. "My boyfriend and I broke up. Well, technically he's my ex now"

Jessica finds it very unimaginable that Korea's power couple are now over after two years of dating. Lee Seunggi chased Yoona for years and Yoona's interest hasn't died down either. Plus, the whole nation supported the couple like a royalty. Now she's worried for the reaction of the citizens and some possible backlash against the two.

"Did you tell others?"

"Nope. You're the first one" There was even a jolly ring in her voice.

"What? Tiffany is gonna kill you and then me" Yoona just smiled from the horror on Jessica's face. "We made that pact about secrets" She vehemently reminded. Rather providing console, she's instead making pointless ramblings.

"Oh come on" She dismissively made a face. "As if everyone is complying with that" And Jessica couldn't agree more to that. There really are secrets that are better kept within one's self.

"How....why.....what happened?" She couldn't even keep her mind straight despite being deceitful in tackling the offhand break up situation. Yoona's calm state is also not very helpful to adjust to the news.

"We talked and broke up. Not the usual dumping the guy or girl but it was a mutual decision"

"I mean, why did you break up?" Jessica felt the awkwardness in her voice.

Without wavering she answered, "You". Her volume suppressed but Jessica heard. Yoona continued playing with her unnie's fingers that she missed to hold.

"You? You mean me? How did I even......" Oh. That reason is already enough to give Jessica some clarity and heave of fraught to hover in her.

"Seunggi oppa is asking me to stay away from you because....." Yoona pursed her lips and hesitated. "He said we're too close and he doesn't like it so he wants me to keep my distance which is insane and that if I don't do it, he'll break up with me"

"And you let him break up with you?" She flatly said, unable to comprehend her words.

"No" Yoona denied with pride. "I was the one who broke up with him. It's just stupid that he's demanding me to stay away because he's jealous? Duh. We're best of friends and I can't do that to you. If he doesn't want to accept my friends, then I can't love that person. We're a package, remember?"

"Yoona...." Jessica pitied.

"Besides, any of us would do the same. If boys want all the fabulousness which is us, the eight sisters come along with it and it's mandatory to deal with that"

"I guess so" Jessica feigned a nod.

"Can you even imagine if I'd really stay away from you?" Yoona turned to her side, facing Jessica who masked her brood with a small smile. The question captured the latter as it dawned on her that it has never crossed in her mind in the past until it is mentioned now.

That distracted her for the mean time and it doesn't have to fully sink completely in her head. Without further thinking, it's just hard to foresee not to have Yoona by her side.

"Who's gonna pull and carry you out of the bed if you don't want to wake up? Who's gonna cook your favorite ramen if the others are making fun of you for being a noob cook and then you'll also laugh at yourself? Who's gonna liven you up if your boredom strikes all of a sudden? Who's gonna give you a piggy back ride because you're too lazy to climb the stairs? I'm essential in your life since we met ten years ago, Jessica unnie. Even a Lee Seunggi has no authority to make me forget about that or invalidate those actions just because he was my boyfriend"

Yoona noticed a small white flake on Jessica's hair. She leaned over her that drew their faces closer. Yoona took the flake with her fingers and flicked it away.

"You're my responsibility and I promised your Mom and Dad that I'll take care of you like how they do when my family is not around. Oh, and I also promised Soojung who threatened of torturing me if ever I'll leave you behind"

There's so much honesty in Yoona's eyes and vividness on how real it is that disbelief would be a direct insult to her unfading concern.

That promise though. It's amusing Yoona took that oath seriously over the years and she never faltered to deliver. Knowing that's her reason of breaking up with her perfect boyfriend, Jessica can't help but feel that it's rather a nuisance.

Worse case scenario, Jessica knows guilt will mount inside her. Worst case scenario, it actually exists now.

Jessica sighed, out of severing frustration and hurled. "You're such an idiot"

Yoona giggled as her eyelids profusely trembled in closing. "It's my life, my choice.... " She has fallen asleep and cradled her head on Jessca's hand that she's still holding as she mumbled in stupor. "....I chose you"

And Jessica meant the idiocy to herself, not to Yoona.



"I'm a wrecker" Out of the blue, Jessica spoke to herself to which Tiffany easily overheard. They're drinking latte at a cafe after their photo shoot ended. Night is about to come and they're supposed to be driving home at this hour but a little coffee drink won't be such a drag.

"You're dating a married man?" Tiffany replied in English knowing that if anyone would have heard them having a conversation about such scandalous topic, it would go straight to news and will spread like wild fire. She twisted her head around to see if anyone who is eavesdropping but the vicinity looked clear.

"No" Jessica scowled and got chills from the horrendous thought. She stirred her latte, watching the liquid in motion like a hurricane. "Yoona's break up has made me restless lately. It's just that," She swallowed. "I should have been careful. I haven't even done a thing but I broke them up"

Tiffany didn't quite know the source of Jessica's abrupt pent up except for the part that they're talking about Korea's former national couple. Judging by her tone and words, she's venting blame to herself for something she basically had nothing to do with.

"Jess, it's clearly not your fault. Any of us would do what Yoona did" She said, determined to alleviate Jessica's remorse. "You are just a cover to the fault in their relationship like some conspiracy. Seunggi had his insecurity issues that made him too possessive of Yoona that he had the audacity to demand such condition. Don't punish yourself like you planted that disease and stop thinking too much" She took a sip of her latte.

"I'm not thinking too much" She insisted and their typical English bickering has commenced.

"You are" She frayed. "And you keep on staring and stirring your drink like it's gonna give you answers if you don't stop"

Jessica swatted the spoon on the plate under her cup and looked at Tiffany with sharp eyes that rendered impatience. "Because I really need answers instead of just the superficial one that I am always led to where I am the cause of ruining a relationship. It's not gonna change, Tiffany. It revolved around me from the very beginning that they talked about me and to the concluding part where Yoona broke up with him because of me. And you're expecting me to just stop thinking about it? I want to, just so you know. But it just naturally forces itself into my head and it occupies me entirely and I don't know how to overcome it so I'm taking the blame to lessen this guilt inside my chest and wished that Yoona should have compromised with her boyfriend and done what he is asking her to do because I feel like it really has been a blatant mistake that I'm in lo-"

"Isn't it clear enough that Yoona just cares more about you than him?" She intervened Jessica from finishing. It also stilled the heated discussion. Tiffany summoned her calm to avoid Jessica from thinking that she's being against her and went on but retained the firmness in her voice.

"Yoona showed that she cares more about you. It's simple as that, Jessie. It's not your problem that Yoona chose you over him nor it is your problem that Seunggi is an insecure dude and jealous of a girl that Yoona has known in years longer than him and lives under the same roof as hers. Ultimately, it's not your mistake that he-"

"I'm in love with Yoona"

"-disregarded your worth for......pardon?"

"I'm in love with Yoona"

"Shhhhh" Tiffany alarmingly shushed Jessica by cupping her hand into . Jessica protested and hummed against Tiffany's palm.

She sat up and scanned the room for witnesses that might have overheard. Realizing the place is almost empty, Tiffany breathed her relief and sat back down then withdrew her hand from Jessica's mouth.

"Do you really have to do that?" Jessica tediously said.

"What if someone heard," Tiffany lowered her voice. "that you're in love with Yoona? All hell breaks loose if that happens"

"That's why we're speaking in English to keep it confidential" Jessica parodied Tiffany's whispering with a teasing smile.

"Everyone knows what 'You're in love with inserts name' means. You don't have to be an English speaking person to understand that"

Jessica opened to counter but she just closed it since Tiffany has a point.

"So you're in love with Yoona and you're gay" Tiffany sounded astonished despite having been said thrice already excluding the last thing. Jessica nodded in confirmation. "Since when?"

"I don't know" She said with a shrug. "It just happened"

"That’s why you feel guilty?"

"Not really" She shook her head. "I don't regret that I love her. I love loving her even if we're just like....this"

"Friends" Tiffany stressed.

"If only I was more cautious and heedful to myself and my ways around her, maybe he wouldn't have known. I really should have drawn the line and just avoided her and not cross any boundaries" She wearily sank her back on the seat, weighed down by her own wandering indignation.

"But it's so unfair" She grunted under her breath. "I can't do the normal things that we always do and be reckless and get carried away like how we used to. I miss the unique bond that we share together. I miss all of it so bad and I miss her. What I can only do is look at her while I stop these feelings from growing and yet there's something inside me that is so unrelenting, I still let it exist"

"But you can now. Not only can stop your longing but also free yourself along with what you feel" Tiffany tried diffusing hope for Jessica but she seemed to be resigning to just the friendship that might’ve already served contentment for her.

Jessica rarely displays her emotions especially her weakness from everyone and usually hides it beneath her cold demeanor. Tiffany would always tell her that showing vulnerability does not make one any less of a strong person and this is the first time that Tiffany felt no need to remind Jessica of that.

This Jessica in front of her though, is not Jessica who finally allowed her weakness to surface for everyone to see. It's Jung Sooyeon who nevertheless proved that she's still standing with a straight face. If Tiffany is in same position as hers, she might have stumbled down in handling the frustration and daunt of loving someone who seemed so close in distance but very far from reach.

Loss at words to say, Tiffany could only hold Jessica's hand and let her know that it's alright, hoping that would do.

"This doesn't turn you on or anything, right?

Jessica returned more than just a smile but laughter and it is enough for Tiffany to know that she's gonna be okay.



Yoona just came from the supermarket when she arrived at their dorm building. Sooyoung asked her to do the grocery since Yoona emptied the fridge after staying indoors for three days and consumed all the junk food and cookies.

She carried a bulked bag on her hand, walking to the back of the building since there might be paparazzis camping outside the main entrance to take pictures of Im Yoona who recently broke up with Lee Seunggi as if break ups don't happen everyday. But then, that's not really the common life of a top star celebrity even if they're only human who also breathe the same air.

She entered the code of the automatic door and the first thing she saw in entering is a girl sitting on the stairs.

"Sica unnie?" Yoona called Jessica's attention and went near her with light and bouncy steps, happy to see her favourite unnie. "What are you doing here?"

"Uh" Jessica couldn't also tell why. She was with Tiffany a while ago but the latter had to leave for an urgent appointment. She just went home alone and found herself to be sitting in the stairs, waiting for something. Now she knows that it's not a something but someone.

"You're waiting for me, aren't you?" Yoona teased and wore a mischievous smile.

Jessica knows that Yoona is just kidding but the irony though. It's actually very true. "No" She bluntly said, turning her face away from her.

"Eh~" Yoona brushed off Jessica's denial. She bended her legs down and tipped her head. "Hop on"

"What?" Acting surprised, Jessica understood what Yoona is trying to do.

"Unnie, I get it. You want a piggy back ride because your golden legs are too precious for the stairs"

"But-"

"No buts" She pointed a finger at Jessica. "Besides, we haven't done this in a while. Come on." Yoona anticipated, making it more difficult for Jessica to refuse again and the thought of climbing five floors terrified her. Obviously, she had no choice but to go behind her dongsaeng's back and hang like a koala.

"Hold tight or we will fall" Yoona fastened Jessica's arms well around her neck. She grabbed the handles of the grocery bag and Jessica's purse before slipping her arms underneath Jessica's knees.

Yoona straightened her body up, carrying Jessica with her might and took steps on the stairs easily. Jessica just smiled as she rested her chin on Yoona's shoulder. She can smell Yoona's strawberry and kiwi-like scent that probably came from either her perfume-sprayed neck or her hair. Jessica closed her eyes, cherishing even this ordinary thing she missed from Yoona.

The sound of Yoona's rubber shoes against the tile of the stairs echoed among the concrete walls. Silence enveloped them that even Yoona's breathing is audible in Jessica's ears. It's getting more sentimental for Jessica as this continues.

It's really been a while that Yoona gave Jessica a piggy back ride and it's been months that Jessica endured taking the stairs even if her body's lack of will did not permit her to do so. Unlike in the past where she just waits for Yoona and she'll automatically stretch her arms the moment she arrives. Then Yoona would act like she doesn't want to and she'll just bend down later on and all Jessica needs to do is ride her back.

"You seem quiet" Yoona broke the silence.

"I just missed this" Jessica shyly admitted. She didn't have to put effort in making her voice louder since her head is just near Yoona's ear.

"For months," Yoona lifted Jessica up, grunting as she was sliding down on her behind. Jessica adjusted her hold around Yoona's neck. "you took the stairs with your own legs and feet huh. Didn’t the stairs burden my unnie?"

"It's alright" It's not.

"Really?"

"Yeah" No.

Unfortunately, Yoona can tell that Jessica meant otherwise. "Then, you don't have to climb the stairs on your own. You can just wait for me like how you usually do"

Jessica did not respond and just looked at Yoona's side profile. She can see her smiling through the curved corner of her lips. No matter how many times she have seen Yoona up close, it's still leaves her mesmerized on how this kiddo grew up beautifully inside and out.

Poor Lee Seunggi for letting this girl go and some netizens commented the same thing. Now, Jessica is the luckiest again. But Yoona, even involved in a relationship, still tells Jessica that she's the luckiest among everyone else. Of course it's only a some form of a joke because of Yoona's reason that she does things she doesn't do to anyone such as this piggy back ride. But Jessica always felt that she is luckiest person whenever she's with Yoona.

For some unknown cause or maybe just due to the stillness of the atmosphere, Jessica fell asleep.  That sleep felt longer than the time that actually passed while her eyes were shut without a care of what's happening around her.

“Unnie, we’re here”

When Yoona reached the front door of their dorm, it’s only then she realized that Jessica has fallen asleep as she did not stir with her call.

She entered their home and Sooyoung saw them coming in with a surprised look that Yoona is carrying Jessica on her back, again. Yoona gestured at Sooyoung to keep silent or Jessica might wake up. She handed the grocery and Jessica’s purse to Sooyoung before going in to her unnie’s room.

On the bed, Yoona gently laid Jessica down who at the same time opened her eyes from the short sleep. She blinked her eyes repeatedly and rubbed them to clear her blur sight. Yoona is sitting on the side of the bed, looking at her.

“I fell asleep on your back, didn’t I?” She said, eyes partially opened and she’s pouting.

Yoona tucked some unruly hair on Jessica’s face to her ear, grinning at her sleepy looking unnie. “Yeah”

“I’m sorry”

“It’s-” Yoona meant to say something but she ended up shutting her own mouth, realizing that Jessica is apologizing for a different reason. A reason she didn’t need to further ask what.

Jessica wanted to say that since the night Yoona confided to her after she ended things with Seunggi. It’s only now that she managed to summon her guts even when she knows it would do no change anymore. The damage has been done and not a sorry would suffice to fix it.  

She thought, apologizing will only be admittance to her fault but after speaking those simple words, there was more to it. She felt the weight inside her lifting up like a feather and being drifted away from her.

To her surprise, Yoona only cracked into a chuckle while slightly shaking her head. “It’s all on me, okay?” She sighed and endearingly laid her eyes at Jessica’s lovely face. “It’s my life, my choice” Yoona touched her hand. “And I chose you”

The similar words she heard in this very room but it felt different. There’s the presence of sanity that Yoona is mindful of what she said and not just random mumbling of words.

Hwang Miyoung is right. Jessica thought. Yoona just really cares about her that much like how she cares for those people that matters to her.

Jessica has fallen asleep when Yoona left her room. Behind the door, Yoona found Sooyoung, eavesdropping on them which got Yoona startled.

“What the?!” Yoona’s hand clutched her chest, feeling her heart coming out. She breathed nervously and hit Sooyoung’s arm but she evaded. “Don’t scare me like that”

Sooyoung jumped back, hands held in the air like surrendering. “I didn’t do anything” She coyly said.

“What was that?” Yoona walked past Sooyoung but she immediately interfered her way.

“That’s supposed to be my line” She marched to her front, crossing her arms and gave her a straightforward look. “How long are you gonna keep lying?”

“I’m not lying to her. I just didn’t tell her the rest of the story and it’s much better that she leans on what she only knows. It’s safer that way”

“Yoona, secrets aren’t meant to be kept forever” She made a quoting gesture in both her hands. “Even Seunggi oppa noticed how intimate you are to her that he got jealous of Jessica and wanted to break up with you suddenly”

“I know that but I’m trying my best to keep it a secret for now, alright? I just know that she’s gonna freak out if she finds out that I did break up with my ex, literally because of her. It’s gonna take some time”

“But all the seriousness aside, I can’t believe you can still tolerate the royal highness attitude for ten yeras. You already gave her a piggy back ride and she even slept on your back for the nth time. How do you even do that?”

“I don’t know” She bit her lower lip and pretended to think. “Well, I’m in love with her. It’s simple as that”

Yoona gave her a wry smile and a tap on her shoulder then she left to the kitchen. Sooyoung was left taken aback, rolling her eyes and scoffed in mockery over how blinding love can really be.  

a/n: I really don’t know what to say with this story. By the way, if it confused you, Seunggi did want Yoona to stay away from Jessica because he’s been noticing the unusual intimacy of Yoona towards Jessica which made him jealous. But Yoona didn’t want to because of the “we’re a package” reason and also, because she’s in love with Jessica. It’s like she grabbed the opportunity of breaking up with Seunggi when he asked it from her and it was also such a turn off for her because Seunggi got jealous and demanded Yoona to keep her distance. I purposely did not directly write this since I think they were already implied. Going back. I’m out of words in explaining story so I think each person may conceive this depending on their perception towards it So it’s like an open-story? Does that even exist? LOL

p.s: I’ve been writing my first full yoonsic story. I’ll post it up once I’ve written five chapters because I’m very slow on updates. I don’t want to create a story with the first chapter and make the reader wait for a month. So, please anticipate and no more previews for now since I can't decide a prompt. Also, thank you for the subscription, up votes and lovely comments. They are great inspirations and motivations for me in writing :)