Luhan doesn't remember exactly when flying in space became his dream, but he'd never thought about anything else more than traversing the infinite universe with the expanse of the galaxy under his fingertips and the stars clouding his eyes. Sure he'd had short lived dreams like all kids do, like becoming a doctor or a pop star or a pro athlete when he grew up. But not for one second had he ever taken his eyes off the stars he'd gaze at from his bedroom window when the night was at its darkest and he'd long since been told to go to sleep. 

He'd be even more assured of his dreams when his father would come home from a new mission. Maybe he'd only be home for that one day the entire year- or maybe even the next few years- but Luhan loved more than anything to be swept away in his father's embrace as he told stories of the magnificent galaxy. He loved to see his father from the visual monitor in their home, talking from space whenever he got the rare chance. Luhan would ask all about what life was like in space and if the stars were really as pretty as they were on Earth and how many space monsters he'd killed that day.

And with reflection of the computer backlight in his eyes, his father would cuddle Luhan to his chest, or chuckle softly with his deep, warm voice, and press a kiss to his forehead (or try to through the visual monitor) and say, "My boy, you'd just love to see the world from where I'm at."

Luhan would know then in his heart that space was really the only place for him.







(Space was the only place for him, even if he did keep it a secret from his father that he was terrified of heights and of flying thousands upon millions of miles above solid ground. Luhan didn't want his father to be disappointed in him for something as trivial as that.)







Today is one of the very few days Luhan has to wear his official uniform. It's a little tight on his arms and itches where his few pins are on his chest. The deep navy blue of the uniform has slowly lost its shine through the many runs in the washing machine (he's always been a little compulsive when it comes to a well pressed uniform), and even though it's been a few years, Luhan laments about how little he's changed since graduation. Yet the signs of wear are minimal. There's not a crease in the slacks nor a button loose on his jacket. 

"Morning, Luhan," Yixing shouts cheerfully, just as the door to the conference room slides open. There's no one but Yixing and Joonmyun who nod in his direction as he slips through the door. The room is large and modern with a long string of windows surrounding the room, giving a dizzying view of the endless expanse of darkness around them.

"Where's Yifan?" he asks, taking his place beside Yixing. Stand tall, shoulders back, toes forward, heels together, palms flat against your thighs- it's been drilled so hard it's second nature.

Joonmyun shrugs. "Probably just waiting for the right time to be appropriately late. You know, make a good impression on the recruits."

Yifan would, Luhan thinks to himself. But the EXO ship is prestigious, staffed with the crew graduating in the top five of their class, and it's mostly thanks to Yifan that they've reached such high esteem. 

The door slides open soundlessly and the chatter behind it grows louder, Minseok's voice ringing out above the rest. He's dressed similarly to Luhan with a few more pins decorating his uniform. "Here's the conference room," he says, a small line of people following after him. "It's rare you'll have anything to do here unless the captain calls for an emergency meeting."

There are three recruits standing in line across the conference table, all about the same height. Their uniforms are slightly different from Luhan's own, a lighter navy and the buttons are silver rather than gold, but times have changed since he's graduated. Two of them are small in stature, faces young and eyes bright. THe last one in line has a well defined face, mirthful eyes, and a cat-like grin.

"I could have sworn there were four of you-" Minseok says, just as the last recruit comes barreling through the door.

"I got lost- !" the recruit screeches as he smacks his head on the doorframe. His hat falls to the ground, revealing brown hair that falls gently against his forehead and prominent ears- and, if Luhan knows the man from not even taking a glance at his face. The man stands back up to his full hight, rubbing his reddening forehead furiously, and oh god, Luhan knows him and he thinks he might've stopped breathing for a moment until Yixing pinches his side. He swallows the yelp in his throat and glares at Yixing instead.

The recruit bows deeply, voice low and thick. "I'm sorry, I got lost."

Minseok chuckles, patting the recruit on the shoulder. "Don't worry about it," he says. The captain's not here yet, so you've made it just in time."

With that, the recruit's smile brightens considerably and it really is Chanyeol. It's the boy Luhan remembers from flight school, tall and lanky and walked with two left feet but absolutely brilliant when it came to flight navigation. How was Luhan not to have heard of Park Chanyeol, who every teacher gushed about his capabilities as a navigator. 

Chanyeol's eyes seem brighter somehow since Luhan last saw him, and the enthusiasm rolling from his smile is still addictive. Luhan's heart beats heavy and slow in his chest and the rhythmic beats are pounding in his ears. He immediately tries to dull the feeling, hoping that closing his eyes will shut his senses down just enough for him to regain focus.

Yifan enters right then. Luhan quickly steels his expression and stands in position again. Minseok joins their ranks and they nod, in sync, to the captain. The recruits, seemingly disoriented, hurriedly do the same.

Yifan takes his spot at the head of the conference table. His collected expression almost falters at the sight of Chanyeol plastering an absurd grin to his face. Yifan quickly averts his eyes and clears his throat.

"Welcome to the EXO ship," he says. He scrolls through his personal monitor, pulling up a projection from his messages from the Space Alliance Base. "You know that you've gathered with us because of the raising threats from the planet Caius," he says, turning to the recruits. "And we plan on training you to the best that we can so that when you're given your own ship, you'll be able to fight alongside us."

The recruits fidget subtly, shifting the weight on their feet and fiddling their fingers behind their backs. It's probably nerve-racking for them; though, Luhan notes, Chanyeol doesn't look dissuaded in the slightest. There's confidence in his eyes, displayed like an open book. It's something most veterans up here don't have, Luhan notes, though it's not necessarily rare for starry-eyed, overly enthusiastic fresh graduates. That light will dim out eventually.

(His dimmed out before he even saw the stars from space.) 

"But if there's anything I want you to take away from training with us," Yifan continues. Luhan snaps back into attention. "It's that in order to be successful here, you have to have trust in your teammates and yourself. Without that, you might as well be hurtling straight for the sun." 

Yifan's eyes glance over his four teammates and catches sight of the stars behind them. It's an infinite space out there, one they've set out to conquer and discover for the safety of Earth. It's a galaxy where no one is sure what lies in the next year, day, or second, or what lurks behind the thousands of planets, stars, meteor showers, and black holes in the darkness. But even in its darkest places, space is wondrous. It's the future for humanity, now that parts of Earth have been cast into the ocean and entire countries have moved to new planets for survival. It's the future they're there to create and preserve. 

"You're in for a hell of a ride."







"You'll have to face him eventually, Luhan."

Luhan chuckles grimly, throwing himself over the infirmary cot. He must've committed a crime in his past life because he never expected to see Chanyeol again, and he wasn't supposed to see Chanyeol again.

"I mean who would've thought," Yixing continues, pulling out the blood pressure monitor and securing his stethoscope around his neck, "that they'd put Chanyeol as a trainee on this ship."

Luhan weakly rubs his eyes, feeling boneless since their meeting before. "Out of every damn ship in the Space Alliance, mind you probably over two hundred ships, they put him on this one," he groans. It all seems like some sick joke someone's decided to play on him, and suddenly they'll jump around the corner and reveal that bright-eyed, navigator prodigy Park Chanyeol is just a hologram, or he'll wake up and this'll all be a horrible dream and he'll really be snoozing in the control room.

Yixing ushers him to sit up, strapping the blood pressure sleeve around his arm and sliding the head of the stethoscope just under it. The room falls silent, save for the wheezes of the blood pressure pump and the velcro of the sleeve crackling as Yixing pumps air into it. Luhan tries to keep a steady breath because surely his heart is beating a thousand miles a minute and Yixing would notice.

But the feelings he'd had for Chanyeol have all seem to come slowly trickling back. It's the same as those times he'd watch Chanyeol during training sessions when the years mixed. He was still the same, tall and lanky and uncoordinated and it was easy to pick him out from the crowd. And Chanyeol would stand above all the students on a raised platform and ace every navigational public practical exam. Luhan's palms used to sweat and his chest would tighten just watching Chanyeol focus on the computer monitors. 

But now, those feelings are sure to be a side of his medication, he drills into his head. He'll be needing a refill soon and it's about time he had a checkup anyway. 

Seeing Chanyeol again though, god it was unreal. Yet he feels so helpless, so smitten that rocks drop in his jittery stomach and make him feel like retching any second. But he knows, better than anything, that those feelings get you killed in space. That's what the pocket knife he always keeps in his uniform is a reminder of.

"Your blood pressure's a little higher than normal, but you're still good. I'll put in an order for more of your anxiety medication," Yixing says, undoing the velcro. Luhan sighs as the feeling slithers back into his arm, or mostly because maybe Yixing hadn't noticed how hard his heart was beating. 

Yixing continues the checkup, placing the cool metal of the stethoscope at Luhan's bare chest and back. The vague feeling of a headache starts to pulse behind his eyes, and Luhan could really use a little sleep, and maybe to wake up from this dream.

Pulling the stethoscope out of his ears and grabbing Luhan's chart, Yixing starts furiously scribbling down notes. "If your anxiety starts acting up, you can take an additional dosage of the medicine, but only do it once a day," Yixing mutters. 

Luhan sighs, hoping to distract himself. His back pops obscenely as he turns in his seat. "See, this is why you're the best medic in space," he says in feigned lightheartedness, hopping off the cot and waving his way out, hoping Yixing doesn't catch him on the way out.

But he does. That's Yixing. He's got a strong grip around Luhan's wrist and meets his gaze with soft eyes. "You don't have to get worked up about Chanyeol, you know-"

"-Who said anything about getting worked up over him?" Luhan sputters, his heart fluttering like wings of a hummingbird in his chest. It's long past lunch time and didn't he take his medication already?

Yixing chuckles, putting his clipboard aside. "Just know that everything doesn't always have a sad ending. There are happy ones too."

Luhan doesn't forget, but shoves Yixing's words into small places in his head and tries to seal up the cracks as he makes his way back to the dorm unit, ready for a nap to calm his erratic heart and the strong headache now pulsing heavily behind his eyes. 







It's no surprise that when Minseok doles out the recruits to their respective mentors, Chanyeol is the one bounding through the control room doors, practically skipping into the room. Luhan's at the mainframe running a few checks through the system when Chanyeol occupies a large percentage of his peripheral vision. And he notes the boy's subtly fidgeting hands, pearly white teeth digging into the soft pink of his lips as if to suppress a smile, eyes taking in every inch of the room. The excitement, so visible in Chanyeol's eyes, looks about ready to push him through the roof.

"Park Chanyeol, sir," he drills. 

Luhan flinches. "Sir is what you'd use around my father," he replies, eyes never leaving his monitor. "You can just use Luhan."

"Ah- y-yes! Sir- no, I mean- Luhan," he bellows, bounding over to Luhan with a wide grin on his face and rosy cheeks sparkling in the dull light of the command room. He makes it to the stairs before his two left feet kick in and he's tripping up the two steps that compose the staircase, palms barely catching him as he falls and a curse falling from him lips. Luhan's unsure why his fingers tremble as they're hovering over the mainframe touch screen.

Chanyeol laughs nervously, the pink dusting his round cheeks growing even redder. But his bold eyes lock on to Luhan's. "I-I hope you'll take care of me well," he mumbles, a hand rubbing the back of his neck. He bows, head nearly hitting the table in his nervousness, and Luhan almost lets a snicker out right then. But he can't help the smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. Chanyeol straightens back up, hair flying around his face and tapering smoothly back around his neck. 

It's strictly training, Luhan thinks to himself. He's not allowed to get worked up this way because they have to focus- and he has to focus because the threats from the planet Caius are real and he could be the one to things up because he wasn't doing his job. That's how he has kept it since he ever stepped on board, and he sure plans on keeping it that way. 

He swallows thickly, palms beginning to sweat over the navigational panels, and manages a small, shy smile. 

"Welcome aboard, Chanyeol."







One week into training, Luhan finds that uncoordinated doesn't even begin to describe how clumsy Chanyeol can be. It's like his brain is connected to the wrong sides of his body and he spends a significant amount of time concentrating on not tripping over himself. Not only that, but Chanyeol's internal clock seems to be in a different timezone, and for a prestigious navigator, he tends to get himself lost quite often.

Two days after the ship sets off for Caius, the recruits are lined up and sent to their posts, save Chanyeol who doesn't show up to the morning roll call. Luhan stumbles through the hallways until he reaches the dorm units where Chanyeol is still asleep, long limbs hanging over the edge of his bed, snoring with the artificial lights blaring right in his eyes. His alarm is ringing off, loud and clear, and yet Chanyeol doesn't even stir.

Luhan tries many things from tugging on Chanyeol's outstretched arm from pitifully trying to drag his lanky body from the bed. But a bucket of cold water does it, scaring Chanyeol from his bed and sending him toppling to the floor.

And just to Luhan's luck, he's not even wearing a shirt. 

Chanyeol blinks up at him, shocked, wide-eyed and a little frightened. Luhan feels his stomach drop again- maybe due to the hunger of skipping breakfast that morning. He bends down and looks Chanyeol dead in the eyes.

"Don't be late again."

Chanyeol is never late again to wake up, though he manages to show up late to his post because he tends to get himself lost around the ship. When it's time for dinner, Chanyeol manages to show up at least ten minutes late for wandering around the ship and losing his way back. He still ends up on the wrong side of the deck when making his way back from the shower. And sometimes the pranks played on him (courtesy of Joonmyun's trainee Jongdae) leave him in obscure places on the ship where there is no one, and no meeting is being held.

And yet Chanyeol shows up to his post with a smile on his face, bright and cheerful with warm eyes. "Morning, hyung!" he calls, collapsing into his chair next to Luhan's at the dashboard, staring amazedly at the control panel. And some mornings, he'll collapse into his chair just to have it creak under his weight and tip him over backwards.

Luhan doesn't understand how Chanyeol can just be so carefree, so overly enthusiastic about this all. It's going to get him into trouble sooner or later. 

But, if he were to be honest with himself, Chanyeol does make him laugh. It helps him ignore the heavy fluttering in his stomach and the heat bubbling in his chest. Things are a lot less colder than Luhan being left to the dashboard and the empty expanse of the universe, just behind the control panels. The sun feels like it's burning so close, too close, and Luhan almost hopes not to be burned by the rays.

"Hyung, I'm here!" Chanyeol says, bounding into the room on the third week since he boarded the EXO ship, the same grin plastered to his face.

Luhan nods in his direction as Chanyeol leans against the dashboard. "What will you teach me today?"

Luhan sighs, "Chanyeol, you know it's not like you don't know everything already."

Chanyeol shrugs, leaning back until his back is pressed flat against the navigational touch screen, his palm has slid over the keyboard, and the alarms are ringing off in the control room.

Luhan thinks about how he's messed up as he pushes Chanyeol out of the way, none too nicely, and starts reprogramming the course as the alarms begin to notify the crew of the change in course Chanyeol's accidentally made.

"I-I can fix that, hyung," he says, swallowing thickly. Luhan pays him little mind as his heart is thumping hard in his chest.

Chanyeol catches his arm midway over resetting the calculations. "Let me fix it," he says, demanding and confident, and Luhan steps back for a moment because this wasn't actually his fault and it's not his problem to fix. 

The younger ticks away at the dashboard, brows furrowed in concentration and lips pressed into a thin line. HIs fingers tap furiously at the keys like second nature. Then, the alarms turn off, the course is reset, and Chanyeol smiles back with a blush dusting his cheeks. "Done! See, I can fix it."

Luhan's heart skips a beat and he hopes the red flaring at his neck doesn't show in his cheeks. "G-Good," he mutters, fingers twitching nervously at his sides. "Really, good job."

Chanyeol can't help but smile proudly back and laugh his boisterous, deep laughter at his achievement. Yes, the unknown space seems much warmer out here, though their course is directed no where near the sun. 







For a while, Luhan is firm to his belief. Navigating the EXO ship is his job, training Chanyeol is his job, and there's no feelings involved. He keeps his nonchalance, makes sure to put as much distance as he can between himself and everyone else. He keeps telling himself it's going to keep him safe, that even in the infinite void, there's not enough room for love. 

But he doesn't even notice when things start falling through the cracks. In moments where he's kicked back in his chair at the navigational panel, Chanyeol at his side, he forgets to remind himself not to form attachments. He forgets to think only of himself when Chanyeol excitedly asks him question after question on how many space monsters he's killed in his life and what it's been like living up in space for so long. He forgets to hide his sweating palms and bursts out in nervous laughter when Chanyeol trips over himself, just to get Luhan to smile. 

It's nice to be so carefree, Luhan thinks. It's nice to forget about the dangers lurking around every planet and every star and to enjoy the heat radiating from Chanyeol's body when they're so close together, looking over panels or just watching constellations float by. 

But Luhan doesn't think he can forget about the pocket knife that always rests heavy in his pants. It's his father's, and it's not specially designed. The aluminum handle is muddled with oily fingerprints and most of the other tools are already rusted and worthless. But the blade is in the most pristine condition, still sharp enough to slice cleanly through anything. The blade still reflects back a blurry image of himself, the metal cold to the touch and heavy in his hands.

It's a reminder of the real cruelty out in space. That no one is ever really safe and behind every star is an infinite darkness where danger is bound to come out of. It's a reminder that the only true light in space comes from the sun, because everything else is just a reflection.

It's a reminder that out here, you are alone. That you can only depend on yourself, and that every last man is only there for himself.

It's a reminder of the life his father lost because he foolishly believed in the love of others in the face of darkness.

And deep in his heart, Luhan would never be able to forget his father.







Luhan finds himself splayed over the infirmary cot again, head muddled and confused. He's got his pocket knife in his hands, running the pad of his index finger over the blade, staring at his blurred reflection. His reflection looks quite solemn, even when it's hard to differentiate his nose from his lips. 

"Your medication's in-"

Startled, Luhan flies up from the bed, hand wound tightly in his chest and his pocket knife shaking in his hands, sharp blade pointed right at-

Yixing. 

Luhan instantly relaxes, feeling the tension seep out of his body like water rushing down a waterfall, and he flops back against the cot. His heart is still pounding relentlessly in his chest and heat is beginning to crawl up his spine, making him a little uncomfortable. "You scared me," he whispers. He finally relinquishes the grip he's had at his chest, though his knife is still held tight in his hands.

Yixing frowns, warm hands coming to grasp and Luhan's and rubbing the tension out of them. "Wanna talk?" 

The navigator bitterly chuckles. The embarrassment still stings. "I just came to pick up my medication," he lies to cover up the fact that he's been lying on the cot for over thirty minutes to think. 

"Then I'll talk," Yixing says. He slides onto the cot, hands playing with the loose strings in his shirt. 

"I'm sure you know what I want to say," he starts, keeping his eyes to the flor. He sighs, pulling his lower lip between his teeth and smoothing out creases in the bed sheets. "I've known you for a while, Luhan. And I can only guess that you must be scared."

Luhan sits up, prone to protest, but Yixing just lays a gentle hand on his thigh and hushes him down. "We all are scared, Luhan, for one reason or another. Even Yifan. And this isn't something that you have to do alone."

"Chanyeol is good for you. I've seen you around him and it's almost like you were that same little kid who'd get scolded by him mom for staying up too late for watching the stars. Or that little boy who'd come to kindergarten, proudly wearing his father's old uniform cap and he'd show it off for the entire class to see."

Luhan doesn't really know what to say. Inside, he's about ready to deny every word that Yixing's said until he the day he takes his last breath. But the medic doesn't let him say a word, just silently handing over his prescription.

"Luhan, even if you can't admit to yourself that you're scared, just know that we're here for you. All of us. And Chanyeol, he has been trying to be there for you for a while. He wants to, but you have to let him."

Luhan's head doesn't feel any clearer as Yixing silently pads out of the room, though the lightness in his heart tells him something different. When the tightness in his chest lessens and he can finally breathe again, he makes his way back to the control room, nearly forgetting his pocket knife on the bed.







When Yifan's birthday rolls around, the alcohol gets pulled out. It's the one day in the year that they ever let themselves drink on board, but no one has ever minded otherwise. 

Luhan skips out on the latter half of the celebration, choosing instead to sit at the star deck. It's an expansive room with only a window that looks out into space. With Luhan's vertigo, it makes him a little bit sick most of the time, but the alcohol already running in his system manages to calm him down a little more.

But he finds he's not alone when he gets there. Chanyeol's already there, dunking back his alcohol in one careful swig. He sighs at the stars just watching from the window.

"Chanyeol?" he asks, the twang of his steps bouncing off the walls. Chanyeol turns around hesitantly, plastering a small smile to his flushed face. It's much different than most of the smiles Luhan has witnessed. "What are you doing out here? Everyone else is celebrating."

Chanyeol smiles, turning out to the large window and pressing his forehead against the cool tempered glass. "I'm just… you know… here," he mutters, eyes unmoving from the infinite darkness. In the distance, planet Caius is looming over them like Death hovers above those who wait for him. 

"Ah, you're one of the sad drunks," he attempts to joke. It makes himself smile a bit, but mostly because it makes Chanyeol smile a little more.

"Wow, that must've been the only attempt at a joke you've ever made in your life," Chanyeol says, the smile on his lips quickly disappearing. In it's place returns the seriousness, and Luhan thinks it's oddly unbefitting of Chanyeol.

But he nods, folding his feet underneath himself and pressing himself close to the glass as well. And they don't say much, not until Luhan pulls out his small pill bottle and takes two pills. He embarrassingly admits that it's anxiety pills for his vertigo, ironic because they couldn't be any higher off the ground. Chanyeol doesn't laugh, but instead nods in understanding and focuses his gaze back on the stars dully twinkling. 

"Something on your mind, Chanyeol?"

Chanyeol snorts, nearly taking up alcohol the can is so close to his face. Luhan full out laughs then, jaw falling open and hands slapping against Chanyeol's thigh and the younger is no better, laughing along more so at Luhan than at himself. 

"Wow the uptight navigator cracks lame jokes and laughs. You must be a lightweight." Chanyeol's smiling though, pearly teeth dulling out the shine of the stars as his eyes disappear behind his smile, and it's nice. It's really nice.

Luhan clears his throat, though the smile doesn't disappear from his face. "Alright, I get it," he concedes. He starts shifting closer to Chanyeol and the body heat is radiating to his skin before he's even realized that he's moved. "I'm kinda uptight."

"Kind of?"

"Okay, a lot," Luhan mutters. The pads of his fingers start tracing the patterns of the stars on the window, leaving behind smudged constellations. The cool glass helps to slow his heart down a bit, but it's still beating in his ears. 

The silence passes for a few moments until Chanyeol sighs. "Sometimes," he whispers, "I wish you'd have more faith in me," he says. It's solemn and quiet, and Luhan is unsure of how to deal with this side of Chanyeol yet. He thinks maybe Chanyeol might've not wanted him to hear that, but the truth always slips out when you're drunk.

"Chanyeol, I-"

"No, Luhan, just listen to me for a moment." Chanyeol's never raised his voice, never shown a kind of furious determination in his shining eyes. "I really like you, hyung. Maybe it was stupid that I liked you the first time I saw you, back in flight school." He hiccups, clutching is beer can tighter. "But I have and still do really like you. And I want you to give me a chance, but I don't think you can."

Luhan hasn't noticed Chanyeol's hand trembling, until he tries to nervously pass his beer can from one shaky hand to another and it slips, crashing to the ground and beer spilling out. Chanyeol curses, digging the heel of his palm into his eyes and curls into himself, hoping to make himself a little smaller. 

And this, Luhan thinks, is it. If he's ever going to gain back trust, then this is where he starts. And so maybe he's still a little too drunk when he pulls Chanyeol's head from his lap and turns it so he can kiss him. It's awkward, because Luhan had just rushed in and Chanyeol hadn't been expecting it. But Luhan stays there, eyes closed and lips pressed against Chanyeol's where the smell of alcohol mixed with cologne still lingers. 

They pull apart, and Luhan takes a deep breath. "I've got a lot of baggage," he whispers, pulling out his father's pocket knife. It's still a little heavy in his palm and his head feels a little heavy too. "You'll have to help me out with that."

Chanyeol smiles, really smiles like that smile he has as he'd come bounding into the control room with the stars in his eyes. He digs in his pocket and pulls out a crumpled piece of paper. But when he opens it, it's a worn photograph, the paper peeling away from how many times it's been folded and stuffed into places. 

"Only if you help me with mine," he says. He stares intently at the picture for a moment, bottom lip caught between his teeth. "It's my brother. Dead, if you didn't get that. Killed five years ago in an accident when the Starcraft's engine room caught on fire after an attack."

Luhan lays a gentle hand on Chanyeol's back. They're both a little stupid, running around each other in circles since the first day. But things can get better, he finally thinks they can.

Chanyeol pulls him into another kiss, this one he's ready for. Electricity sparks from his stomach and ignites his veins, his heart is pumping furiously in his chest, but he tries to stomach the feelings as throat attempts to close up in response. Chanyeol's still clumsy, even when it comes to kissing. Even when their teeth knock together though, Luhan doesn't stop. He lets Chanyeol's hand cradle the back of his head, fingers running through his hair. His brain is running haywire but his heart finally feels it's clear, like bright starry nights without a cloud in the sky. 

It's wonderful like this, like his childish desire of the stars has finally sparked again in his heart. And he thinks for a moment that maybe, just maybe, he could have a different ending than his father's.