Hi guys!!! Sorry for the super duper late update. I was so busy with school works and writer's block is really high for these past months. 

I will really try to update sooner and maybe there are 3 or 4 more chapters left so please bear with me. 

Anyways, please enjoy reading this new chapter..

I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!

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[Rian’s POV]

Why?

“Rian?”

Why am I feeling like this?

“Ya! Rian-ah?”

Why is my heart racing?

“Hey! Are you alright?”

I flinched when he tried to touch my cheek “I-I’m f-fi-fine! Don’t worry about me,” he looked at me, worried. Oh, please, Jonghyun, you brat! Don’t look at me like that!

Wait! Why am I acting like this in front of him? It’s like when I first met…. Oh, back when I first met Byunghun. No way!! Why am I getting flustered? He’s my best friend for crying out loud. “Okay, if you say so.”

We walked together until we reached our classroom. I saw Minseul and Chanhee talking about something. When I went to them to ask, Chanhee suddenly scrammed after seeing me and Minseul got pale as if she saw a ghost. Is there a problem concerning me? It’s giving me something suspicious.

---

[Minseul’s POV]

It’s so obvious! Ha! After seeing Rian being pushed by that Jiyeon , she was scary, like she could kill that on the spot. And she was scarier when she commented about her actions to Jonghyun. I can see it now. She probably saw it as if she’s protecting her beloved best friend. But, from what I’ve seen, she’s going to forget that jerk (Byunghun) very soon.

“Hey, Chanhee. Can I talk to you for a minute?” Chanhee went over me with his curious look and sat beside me.

“What are you planning this time, Minseul?” he asked. He must’ve figured out what I’m thinking. He’s really smart.

“Well, have you observed the way Rian reacted a while ago? She was super scary even though she was super calm. Have you already observed her actions, haven’t you?” then he smirked knowing that we shared the same ideas.

“Are you planning to make Rian realize her true feelings towards her best friend?” I nooded and he’s typing on his phone and showed me what he typed.

Don’t tell Jonghyun about this. He’s in love with Rian just as Rian is in love with Jonghyun. I already knew that there is something between those two. But, Rian was the most oblivious and dense person we know. And besides, Byunghun was just super cool that Rian wasn’t able to resist his charms. But, really, without Byunghun making a move on Rian back then, then Jonghyun and Rian would probably dating right now. She won’t be crying and Jonghyun won’t be that frustrated.

Oh really? They like each other? OH MY GOSH!! I’m building a new ship again!! It’s Jonghyun x Rian. I want this ship to sail soon. “So, are we up to this secret mission? I really want the both of them to be happy. And really want Byuunghun to just disappear in their lives.”

Chanhee choked after I said that. I shrugged it off and typed something on my phone then I showed him this text:

Let’s tell the guys about what we plan. Maybe Minsoo has ideas or Changhyun can help us think of something that would make our plan super successful.

“I don’t trust Changhyun and Niel about that. But, those two, being the goofball among the guys, are the most trusted in secretkeeping. Let’s just tell them about the secret and the rest will be up to us three: you, me and Minsoo.”

“Got it,” Chanhee and I went on with making the plan. We have so much ideas popping out. It would be great if we could do it all. Besides, I want to see some genuine smiles from my friends.

We were so immersed on our plans that we didn’t know that Rian and Jonghyun finally returned. “Hey, what are you two doing? Do we have homeworks?”

As soon as we saw Rian, Chanhee got pale and he suddenly went back to his seat. “W-What?” why am I stuttering?! Remember, you didn’t do anything, Minseul. Yup, I didn’t do anything except I made some plans for my ship to sail with the help of Chanhee. “Uhm…… No, we don’t,” I tried to breathe casually to cover up my lies. If she found out I was planning something for her lovelife, she’s going to kill me.

“Okay,” she then sat down and went into study mode. I watched her carefully. She was blushing.

Eh? Blushing? I still watched her actions and she suddenly turned her attention to Jonghyun’s attention who was taking a nap. She then went back to her book now more tensed. Ooh!! I think I might witness a story of a girl who started to like her best friend. I can’t wait to tell Chanhee about this discovery.

[Rian’s POV]

Why am I feeling hot whenever I’m staring at him? This is really annoying to me? Why am I having these feeling towards with him? He’s my best friend? What if he would get awkward with me? Am I the one who will destroy our friendship?

My phone vibrated and got my cellphone outside my bag. I was surprised that I got a message. I don’t usually text my friends since I’m seeing them every day. The only person who I texted daily was that jerk. Receiving a sudden message.

1 Message received

Jerk

Oh. After what happened, he still wants to mess up with me. But I need to read what he wants to say.

I’m sorry that I have been a jerk to you, Rian. But truth be told. I still love you. It really hurts me to make that decision to break up with you. I don’t want to see you get hurt in front of me. I’m sorry if I have to hide this from you. Please just forget about me. I can’t have you crying because of me.

Don’t you know that whenever you smile, it makes me fall for you more?

I immediately deleted his message. Why? Why is he so persistent on making me hurt? I hate him for hiding things like that. Even dragged my best friend to hide his secret. Can’t he just be honest with me? Maybe he doesn’t love me in the first place.

I turned off my phone and finally the teacher comes to start the afternoon classes. Out of the blue, I suddenly looked at Jonghyun who’s staring back at me. I felt my blood went to my cheeks. Damn that brat, making my heart race even though I just got hurt by Byunghun’s text.

I turned my gaze at the blackboard and kept on trying to focus on our lessons.

…….

After class, I gathered my things before I exited the classroom. I have the feeling that I shouldn’t be hangin’ around with the guys now. But, I just got reconciled with him. We had a big fight because of his act of hiding things from me. So, if I tried to isolate myself from them, they might say that we haven’t reconciled yet.

I was about to exit the room, Jonghyun suddenly grabbed my arms. “We’re going there now,” he said.

Going? Did he meant at the Hospital where Byunghun was confined? “No, I’m not going back there.”

“But, his brother was worried when Byunghun got worse. His voice is no more and his health has dropped,” he’s trying to tone down his voice since he doesn’t want Minseul to hear our conversation.

“Well, that served him right. He should be getting worse for hiding secrets from me,” Jonghyun’s gaze darkened and it sent me shivers making me scared, but I won’t hold back and let him know what I feel. “And he made you hide it from me as well.”

“Are we going back to that issue again?” he was now sighing heavily that most of the guys and Minseul has already turned their attention to us. “Rian, don’t be so immature. I’m doing this because I don’t want you to feel this bitterness again! I know you’re trying to be your old self. But, the pain in your heart will never fade if you keep that anger inside you. Please, just consider it. I can’t have you cry inwardly again. As your best friend, it’s my job to make you see reality and learn from and make yourself better. I told you, remember? I love you so much I can’t bear seeing you pretending.”

His words gave me both relief and pain inside. He’s definitely my best friend. But, why do I feel like when he said ‘Best Friend’, I was being rejected. And he even said he loves me, but that only means as a friend.

It took me a lot of courage to agree with him and we finally told our friends that we’re not hanging out with them today. I think Minseul was worried but she let it go for she was scared that Jonghyun would yell at her. “Ya! Don’t make Rian mad. We really thought you’re having a big fight again,” Chanhee said worriedly.

-----

We decided to ride a taxi to avoid being followed. Jonghyun took a lot of cautions now and even make us stop at a mall before we rode a bus to get to the hospital. “Honestly, Minseul is not that sneaky. I swear!”

“Yeah! You girls are really denial queens. Minseul is just like you, investigative and sneaky,” I whacked his head for saying things like that. Well, can’t be helped if our instincts our leading us on things that we feel suspicious. And we often got it right though. He just ignored me and we went inside the hospital.

Every step I took, the intensity of my nervousness made it worse. Is it because I really hate Byunghun that I don’t want to see him or is it because I love him so much that it hurts me seeing him in the worst condition. I unconsciously grabbed Jonghyun’s sleeve and I can’t stop crying. Damn it! Why do I need to him? Now, that I’m starting to move on, why do I have to undergo this process of this heartbreak. Please, stop hurting me. I don’t want this.

I felt Jonghyun hugging me tightly. “I know it’s hard for you,” he started. “Trust me, this will help you feel better.”

“Jonghyun, why are you torturing me? Is this taking revenge on me?”

“Revenge? No. I have no ulterior motives.”

I hugged him tightly and he just gave me one of his bear hugs which are comforting. Wait, I haven’t experienced this kind of relief whenever I hug Byunghun. Maybe I wasn’t really in love with him after all. Damn me! Why am I thinking this way?

As we finally reached Byunghun’s room, I stopped again and took a step backward. “It’s okay if you are hesitating. I won’t pressure you.”

I looked at him determined written on my face. “It’s fine. I think it’s better if I’m going to say what I have to say. And I’m going to end everything between us. I’m going to tell him that I’d given up on. And I was too dumb that I just realized it now.”

I kind of looked at Jonghyun in his blank stare. I don’t know what he’s thinking right now and I don’t plan on knowing it anyway. Well, being Jonghyun, his silence is always scaring me much. And he’s really hard to read even though we’re best friends.

The door opened revealing Byunghun’s older brother. “Hey, you came. This chicken really wants to see the both of you,” then he looked at me. “Especially you, Rian. This brother of mine broke up with you, but he’s too obvious he wants to see your face. Writing those letters every day. My brother really on it.”

The three of us got inside and we saw Byunghun’s current situation. I can’t help but cry again as I saw him in his hospital bed, two large oxygen tanks on both sides and a mask covering half of his face. It’s clear that he breathes heavily and clearly that days are counted before his life is no more. My tears kept on flowing and my heart really sank watching his situation.

Why did he hid this from me?

I kept on asking myself when I saw him looking at me, tears already flowing out from his eyes.

I can’t stand this. This feeling, I want it out. I don’t want to be occupied by my past and my best friend. These two people in my life which gave me confusions and questions. Why’s, How’s, When’s and What’s are already running in my mind?

“R-Rian,” my heart sank deeper as I heard him calling my name. “You came,” he called his brother and whispered something then I just watched his hyung nodded and went out of his room. “I have something to tell to the both of you.”

I don’t what came to me and I just went to Byunghun hugging him and tears are not stopping to flow down my cheeks. “Say it, jerk. Explain everything or I’ll kill you before your expiration date.”

(To be continued)

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I'm going to post my second story after Secrets and Moving On  is completed..

Until the next update 

-Pjaneisme