Girl you don't know how I feel (how I really feel) 
Since you been away, oh baby

Sehun stands on the large stage with Luhan and Tao next to him as they chatter away. They throw smiles and heart signs to the screaming fans while Sehun ignores all of them. He keeps quiet and sneaks little glances to a certain girl who stands a few metres away.
She was like a magnet: no matter how much Sehun resists looking at her or thinking about her, he finds himself drawn to the smiling girl. Even with a small sheen of sweat covering her face, she was by far the most beautiful girl in the entire stadium.

His eye snaps back as Luhan pulls his arm and their eyes met. With their gazes locked, Luhan shakes his head and holds Sehun’s arm tighter.

“Don’t.” Luhan whispers.

But Sehun couldn’t help himself. It was as if there were no one else in the stadium and Sehun couldn’t hear the screaming fans or feel Luhan’s tight grip on Sehun’s arm. With the familiar sense of longing in Sehun’s chest, his eyes slides over to Krystal once again.
Krystal stands there next to Kai, barely a metre away between them. Kai turns to Krystal and says something before both of them erupts into laughter. A delighted smile spreads over Kai’s face at making Krystal laugh and Krystal looks at Kai in the way she used to look at Sehun. Sehun quickly averts his gaze and forces a smile on his face.

He didn’t want anyone to see his face, he didn’t want anyone to see the sorrow in his brown eyes and insane forced smile. Because his chest was being torn apart and his heart was mangled with pain. The pain was excruciating and intense, like someone had torn his heart out of his chest and stomped on it continuously.

~~

Girl you say that you don't wanna talk but it's cool
I've been thinking 'bout you all day long, hoping you pick up your phone

Sehun dials the familiar numbers onto his phone with sweaty palms and an intense feeling of longing in his heart. When all the numbers were entered, Sehun stares at the Call button on his phone, hope and desperation plastered over his face. Sehun hastily presses the button and waits impatiently. His shoulders were tensed up, every muscle in his body yearning for the voice on the other end to answer.

The dial tone rang while Sehun holds his breath, staring at his phone without blinking, taking in the image of Krystal Jung on his phone. Once, twice, thrice, the dial tone rings and the automated voice pops up, stating for him to leave a message.

“Krystal,” Sehun whispers to his phone. “Please, please reply. I love you and I’ve been thinking about you all day long. I don’t want our relationship to end like this” he pauses to catch his breath but the short ten seconds to leave her a message ends. Sehun lets out a tired breath and slumps onto his bed, his eyes sore and red.

~~

Girl you see me standing here (standing here)
Standing in the rain (oh baby)

Sehun stands outside Krystal’s dorm, his clothes soaked with water and his hair messily plastered over his pale face. He stares at Krystal’s room window where Krystal resides. It’s only 11, not late enough for Krystal to be asleep but late enough that she had no more schedules.

“Krystal!” Sehun screams, his throat raw and dry. He had been standing outside for hours with the merciless rain pounding on his shoulders. But he doesn’t complain even with God against his side, because he knows he deserves it.

Sehun falls to his knees, his fists bunched up tightly together and he raises his head to look up at her window once more. He raises his fists to his chest and grasps his left side, clutching his broken heart. Inside, he hopes Krystal is watching.

“Krystal, please forgive me!” Sehun yells through the rain, his voice hoarse and weak. Sehun now doubts Krystal can even hear his pathetic apologises but he doesn’t care. “Krystal!” he attempts to yell but exhaustion causes him to collapse on his knees again and nothing louder than a whisper escapes Sehun’s lips.

~~

Don't tell me you're my heartbreaker (baby don't tell me, no)
Cause girl my heart's breaking (heart is breaking)

“Sehun”

Sehun’s heart stops and he freezes, finally hearing the voice he desperately wished for in months. He turns around and faces Krystal Jung. And despite everything, a genuine smile slips on Sehun’s face and he stares at Krystal’s face, studying every detail on her face.

Krystal flinches for a brief second before her face hardens and resumes her usual emotionless expression. Her usual warm brown eyes, now cold black orbs bores into Sehun’s eyes.

“You finally,” Sehun stops and struggles to form a sentence but even so, the clear delight in his face couldn’t be denied. Krystal’s gaze slides again from Sehun, unable to meet his eyes.

“Stop” she says in the coldest voice she can muster and Sehun’s smile wavers. “Stop calling me, stop waiting outside my dorm. And just never talk to me again Oh Sehun!” her voice rises in her last sentence and she spins on her heels, stomping away from the silent boy.

Sehun slowly processes Krystal’s cold and harsh words towards him with a small frozen smile on his handsome face.  Now all Sehun can think is that was probably the last time Krystal will ever utter her name and the last time Krystal would ever acknowledge or talk to him. And because of that, Sehun’s breaks down.

He can feel his heart breaking, everyone single crack and chip not escaping Sehun’s attention and something else inside Sehun shatters. Sehun falls to his knees, his composure broken, his heart broken and everything else broken as well. No longer able to maintain his composure, tears slowly drip down his face and onto his hands.

Krystal Jung, the girl he loved more than anything in his life. The girl that went through all the tough times during their trainee years together, the girl who he first called when he heard of his debut, the girl that forced him to buy kimbap for her band and the girl who shared laughs and tears together.

But now Sehun didn’t have Krystal Jung to share his tears with.

~~