"Have you ever been in love?" The words came out of my mouth.

I stared at her, waiting for an answer. My heart beating a little faster than before. Why did my heart beat faster? Heck, that's not even on my mind right now. 

"I have.. I think." She replied after what felt like forever.

"Really? When? How?" My furious lashing of questions may have intimidated her, but adrenaline keeps kicking in making me more excited.

"During winter. When I least expected it." She replied calmly.

"Serious? So what's that person's name?" I fired the next question almost immediately.

Yoona stared at me for a while with her doe eyes then pinched my cheeks. 

"Why do you care so much? Perhaps.. You're interested in me?" She smiled cheekily.

"Wh..what?! No way, who would like you! You're clumsy.. and you're slow.. and you cause all the trouble." I retaliated upfront. 

It was perhaps at this moment that I realized, maybe I have really fallen in love with her. From the time when I first met her and thought she was trouble to the time we spent together all winter, she gave me the best time of my life. To put it in a cheesy manner, she gave my life colours. I pondered about my life before her, and I thought to myself 'I don't want to go back to that'. 

"Hmph, I'm going to go to bed! You can stay here and freeze to death." She flared her nostrils and walked into the room. 

I followed behind her knowing she was feigning it. We cuddled up in our beds, comfortable in the warmth of the thermal blankets. And we ended up talking the through the night.

----------

It was finally the last week of her stay with us. From the first week when I wanted to go so badly, now I wanted her to stay. I entered her room without her noticing, and looked at her pack her clothes into the luggage bag. The yellow luggage bag that caught my eye on the first day we met make it seems like it was only yesterday. I folded my arms and leaned against the drawers, putting on a bitter smile as I continued to watch her pack.

"Hey ert, you staring at me?" Yoona teased. 

"You've really gotten used to making fun of me, haven't you?" I walked over to help her pack her clothes. 

"That's because I'm comfortable around you." 

"You better not. I'm afraid you'll not get used to the life without me around." It was my turn to get back at her.

"Yea, I will miss it a lot. Thanks for letting my stay here." She replied.

I had not expect her reply to be so serious. I was unable to come up with anything to reply her. I just patted her head and continued to help her pack.

"Come back anytime, I'll always be here." I could think of nothing better.

"Thanks." She said.

I may have been imagining it, but that day I saw a little tear in her eyes. That probably sparked me to drag her out of the house immediately, a sudden rush of emotions and impulse. I wanted to let her know how I felt. How I like her dorky and active side, how even though she screws up she manages to make me smile, and how she makes my heart beat faster just by being close to her.

"Where are you taking me?" She asked, as she continued to be dragged along.

"Somewhere! Just trust me." I put on the helmet for her and we went to the beach on my bike.

That was the first time I had let anyone else but myself on the bike. And when her arms were hugged tightly around my waist, I felt that it was all that matters to me. Her being by my side was the single most important thing in my life.

"Listen to me carefully and let the ocean bear witness to what I'm about to say." I said.

Yoona was probably still confused about the entire situation she was in. But I trusted that my feelings would get conveyed to her.

"Im Yoona! I really really like you! Please stay with me! If possible please become my wifey!" I took a deep breath after shouting.

Yoona looked at me and I smiled while looking back, almost sure that she would say yes. But she broke out in tears all of a sudden. She used both her hands to cover her face and she bent down, sitting on the sand and crying.

"Yoona?" I went over to her.

"Don't come any closer. I'm sorry this happened." She continued crying.

"What's wrong?" I felt lost.

"I'm sorry that I led you to think that I liked you, but I don't." She sobbed.

I just stood there, lost in the situation. My heart ached like mad that day and I felt sorry for myself. Sorry that I had such wishful thinking. I knew tha a happy ending is not for everyone but still I hoped, and now I'm miserably crushed. I looked at Yoona and she was still sitting on the sand, crying away. I didn't know where I found the courage to do the next thing I did, but I did.

"Let's go back, we still have to get you back to the airport." I forced a smile. 

I dragged her by the hand back to my bike. She didn't even dare to hold her head up and look me in the eyes. I nonchantly passed her the helmet and we headed back to my place. Throughout the trip both of us kept silent but I could hear her crying away, it was the first time I saw her cry, and I was the one who made her cry.

My whole family was there at the airport to see her off. She smile and waved at my family as she walked past the departure hall. I was the only one who she didn't waved to, and I didn't bother waving back either. I clenched my fist feeling bitter from getting rejected. I sent her a text on an impulse, hoping I'd still have a chance. 

'I know winter break doesn't end till the end of this week. I'll wait for you at the beach everyday during sunrise. If you insist on saying no, then don't bother coming.' I thought about it later and found myself too aggressive, but the text has already been sent.

----------

BACK TO PRESENT

It was the last day of winter break, and she hadn't appear at all. She haven't even sent me a text since she went back. I twisted the handle and went even faster, hoping it'll soothe my frustration. That night, I sighed a lot of times regretting that I had even met her.

The next day I woke up with my eyes all red from crying. My mum was so worried she insisted that I see a doctor, but I declined saying it was just lack of sleep. I grabbed my school bag and walked to school, dead as a zombie. Winter break has ended, and so has my dream. All the times I had spent with her felt so unreal. And now that she's gone it felt even more like a dream. 

I paid no attention to all the classes that day, well it's not like any classes are important on the first day anyway. I went home still feeling bitter. Heck I didn't know anyone could feel depressed for such a long period of time. I opened the door to my place and saw my parents getting dressed up anxiously and getting ready to leave the house.

"Where are you guys going?" I questioned.

"Yoona is in the hospital and she isn't in a very good condition, we're going to go see her." My mum pushed me aside and walked out the door.

"Yoona is in the hospital?! When? How?" I bombarded my mum with questions.

"I'm not too sure, now you head in and have your dinner before doing your work." She ushered me to go in with her hand.

"Wait, I'm going with you guys." My heart raced.

"No you're not. You have school, now hurry in!" She replied.

"I'm going!" I couldn't care less about what my mum thinks.

My mum sighed in defeat. She knew that there was no changing my mind.

"Hurry up and change, we'll wait for you." 

"I'm going like that." I said, still in my school uniform.

----------

AT THE HOSPITAL

My parents and I arrived at the hospital and we acquired Yoona's ward from the counter. I was excited to see Yoona after so long and I wanted to tell her how much I missed her. Yet I was worried, afraid that her condition was really dire. I opened the door and collapsed at the scene before me. Yoona was hooked onto several machine, and she was wearing the ever familiar oxygen mask. 

"Yoona? You can hear me right?" I leaned closer towards her, without even greeting her parents.

I cried worse than I did that night, that night that she didn't turn up. 

"Why, why are you lying here? Is it because I said I like you? Please just wake up, I won't ever say I like you again." I leaned against her chest and cried.

"What happened to Yoona?" I could overhear my parents' conversation.

"She has leukemia, and the doctor said she didn't have much time left. I'm sorry to let her go to your place when she was so ill, but she said she wanted to see snow no matter what." Yoona's mum explained.

"I'm so sorry to hear that." My mum solemnly said. 

"Yoona please wake up, I'll bring you to see all the snow you want. You only played with it this one time. Let's play it every winter from now on, just wake up." I wailed.

"Now Yuri, you need to let Yoona rest." My dad pulled me away from the bed. 

I sobbed uncontrollably, shaking in my dad's arm as I cried into his chest. 

----------

After that night I went to visit Yoona everyday. On weekdays after my school and on weekends through the whole day. I told her to wake up everyday.

"Hey Yoona, it's another boring day at school. I did the same thing again, thinking about you." I did my routine storytelling.

"See this diary, it has already been 3 weeks since that night, I marked it all out. I think you have rested enough now, how about you wake up." I shook her lightly.

Yoona's parents came by soon after, already not surprised at my presence.

"Hello Yuri, you're here again." Mrs Im smiled.

Her face looked pale and lifeless, I wondered if mine looked the same. 

"Do you want anything to eat Yuri?" Mr Im kindly offered.

"I'm fine, I'll stay with Yoona a little longer before I leave." 

"All right, be careful not to overtire yourself." He kindly advised. 

"I will." I forced a smile.

On that very night, just when I was about to leave, I saw a miracle happened. Yoona opened her eyes, at first squinting trying to adjust to the light, then she saw me staring right at her.

"Yuri? Is that you?" She reached out for my face.

"Yoona, yes it's me." I caught her hand, smiling and tearing at the same time.

"I'm not dreaming am I?" 

"No you silly, it's really me." I replied.

"Why are you here?" Her voice sounded weak.

"To see you of course. Before you ask anymore questions let me get the doctor." I said urgently.

"No, don't go. Stay with me." She begged.

"All-all right." I decided to stay after she used her doe eyes on me.

"I'm sorry about our winter break, I'm sorry I rejected you, and I'm sorry I didn't turn up." She confessed out of the blue.

"It doesn't matter, what matters is that you're all right." 

"I really wanted to go, I swear, but I know that I didn't have much longer to live. I didn't want to break your heart. I really missed you a lot." She said all that while crying.

"Shh, the past doesn't matter anymore. You just need to get better." I didn't want her to say anymore.

"I can only say it now Yuri, I'm so glad I went over to your place. I only wanted to see snow but I found an snow angel instead." She said.

"I'm not a snow angel silly. Don't say anymore and get some rest. You'll get better then we can go play in the snow again." I panicked, hearing her voice grow weaker and weaker.

"It's okay Yuri, I know this is probably the last time I'm going to see you. Just let me finish." Yoona continued speaking.

"No, no I don't want you to go. You're supposed to stay with me." I cried the third time, over this winter break. 

"I really would have liked to officially go on a date during winter break with you. But please don't cling on to me. I really hope you'll find someone that'll make you happy." She forced a smile with her pale lips.

"You will go, I will bring you." My heart raced even faster, knowing I was about to lose her. 

"Thanks for letting me love you because you loved me more. I will never forget the winter, that winter that I fell for you." Yoona's eyelids closed achingly slow. 

"Yo-yoona?" I looked at the heartbeat machine and place my finger at her nose, searching for any signs of life. 

"Doctor? Doctor!" I shouted.

----------

I walked out the ward in defeat, knowing I have lost the very thing that I cherished most. They always said winter is a cold and harsh period. There was probably no room for any warmth. I held on to the pendant she gave me before returning to the real snow angel's hands. I didn't know how many times I cried that winter, but that was probably the last.

I will never forget her, the girl that made me smile.

That winter, I fell for you.