Jiyong and Chaerin were in the recording studio putting the final touches to their latest collaboration. But Jiyong noticed that Chaerin was not herself today. She kept looking at her watch and had been asking him if everything was done. Truth be told, the song was already completed but Jiyong just like having her by his side and was just dragging the time out before he had to release her. He wanted to ask her out but he couldn't seem to find the guts to do it.

 

Because it wasn't just a friendly outing that he wanted. He wanted to confess his feelings for her.

 

"Oppa! Jingyo oppa!!"

 

There it was, her aegyo which he had no defense against. He turned to her and gave her a broad smile.

 

"Yes, Chaerin oppa~?"

 

"Oppa, that joke is getting old. Anyway, are we done here?"

 

"Erm, maybe? Why?"

 

"I'm meeting someone after this and he wants to know if we are done."

 

"Who is this person? A guy?"

 

Even as Jiyong said it, he couldn't help the tight squeeze around his heart.

 

Please say no.

 

But all she gave him was a bright smile. Her eyes were barely visible under that sweet eye smile.

 

.

 

Jiyong was about to say something when Chaerin’s phone rang. She took a look at her caller ID and the smile on her face got broader and the look in her eyes got softer. Jiyong wanted to snatch the phone out of her hands and just keep her right there beside him.

 

For always.

 

“Oppa, you are here? I told you to wait…”

 

Chaerin was interrupted mid-sentence when the door opened. Jiyong looked up and he was taken back by the shock that ran through his body. He could not believe who stood before him. Chaerin stood up and walked to him. Before she could stop him, he put his arm around her waist and gathered her close to kiss her on her temples. She looked at him and gave him another big smile before kissing his nose and resting her arms around his neck.

 

“Bae oppa, didn’t I ask you to wait for me at the car park?”

 

“Knowing your Jiyong oppa, he would continue to dilly-dally till he’s absolutely satisfied with the song. I don’t want our date to be delayed.”

 

“Bae oppa, you forgot what I said about not interfering when I’m working.”

 

“Baby, I don’t see you in the recording studio. You were just sitting here listening to the mixing right? Ji, is the recording done? Can I have her now?”

 

Both Youngbae and Chaerin turned to look at Jiyong who seemed to have lost his tongue, together with his heart and his soul. He couldn’t believe what he was seeing but he knew that it was real. The slight twitch in his heart now became excruciating pain because he knew at that moment, he had lost.

 

Both his best friends.

 

He took a deep breath.

 

Smile, Kwon Jiyong. Even if it kills you, you have to smile.

 

Jiyong put on his best smile and swallow the tears that threaten to fall.

 

“Wow~! When did this happen? Congratulations!”

 

“I think I have to thank you for it since you were the one who suggested the whole ‘Chaerin oppa’ joke and that was when it hit me that she is nowhere near an oppa. So I took the chance and asked her when we came back from Osaka. I was really surprised when she said ‘yes’.”

 

At this, Youngbae and Jiyong exchanged a look and in that instant, Jiyong knew. He knew what Youngbae was telling him.

 

It had always been you. But you were just too slow and she got tired of waiting.

Sorry bro, I’m not letting her go. Never again.

 

Jiyong turned to look at Chaerin who tilted her head and smiled before saying in her cutest voice which she knew Jiyong would give in to every single time. She went over to Jiyong and hooked her hands through his arm. Jiyong looked down at their linked arms and the pang of shock and pain almost had him flinging her hands away. He quickly looked at Chaerin instead.

 

“Jingyo oppa, can I go now? I’d make you your favorite cookies the next time I bake a cake for Bae oppa, ok? I barely get to see Bae oppa since you guys are doing your Dome tour right now.”

 

Jiyong didn’t know how to react because he knew that she used to bake those cookies exclusively for him, knowing that he loved them after he got them as a Valentines’ present from her 3 years ago. Now, hearing her say that she would bake him the cookies only when she’s baking a cake for Youngbae just felt like she took a blunt knife, stick it through his heart and then gave it a good twist. He was bleeding but he couldn’t show it. He stole a quick glance at Youngbae before turning to give Chaerin a pat on her head.

 

“Look at you! When was the last time you pulled this stunt on me? Alright, you can go. But make sure I get double portions of those cookies.”

 

“Thank you oppa~~ Yup~ I’d give you more of the cookies~ Don’t work too late and take care of yourself! See you soon!”

 

With that, she released Jiyong, went to pick her bag and walked towards Youngbae. There was a nagging in Jiyong’s head and when he saw the two of them holding hands, he finally remembered what he wanted to ask.

 

“Bae, have you…”

 

“I have already talked to Hyun Suk hyung and he already gave us his blessings, saying that he knows that Chaerin will be safe in my hands. The PR department had already been told. We are not going public yet but we will be telling our members and people who work with us closely about our relationship soon. So, I guess you are the first to know.”

 

“I see. Alright, go on then. Have fun~!”

 

“We will.”

 

“But just out of curiosity, where are you guys going?”

 

Youngbae and Chaerin looked at each other then let out a laugh. Youngbae turned to look at Jiyong and then said cheekily.

 

“It’s our secret. Let’s go, baby.”

 

With a wave, Youngbae and Chaerin left the studio. The last thing Jiyong saw was Youngbae leaning close to Chaerin’s ear and whispered something which made Chaerin smile shyly before hitting him playfully on his arm. Jiyong closed his eyes. He had seen enough. He picked up his phone and dialled a too-familiar number. When the other party picked up, Jiyong said quickly.

 

“Seungho, where are you? I need to get drunk tonight and I don’t want to be alone. Can you ask Soo Hyuk to come too? Let’s just meet at my place. I don’t want to create a scene outside the comforts of my house.”

 

“So I guess you finally got to know about Chaerin’s relationship with Youngbae huh? Alright, I’d ask Soo Hyuk and be right over.”

 

“You mean you know about it? How come you didn’t say anything?!! Here I am, thinking I had a chance!! I was going to confess today!!”

 

“You had 3 years worth of chances. You should have said something when you wrote R.O.D. and asked her to collaborate with you. She was still waiting for you to say something, anything. But when you didn’t say anything, she just took it as you do have someone in mind when you wrote the song but that someone wasn’t her. So she gave up waiting. Youngbae and her had been sitting on the fence and I must say he’s a patient chap, especially when he is well-aware of her feelings for you.”

 

“Do I still stand a chance?”

 

“No. It’s over, Ji. Wish her happiness with Youngbae, that’s the least you could do as her beloved oppa. I’d see you later at your house.”

 

Jiyong ended the call and he turned towards the console and hit the ‘PLAY’ button. As he listened to the song, every line mocked him. Every single line, he wrote with Chaerin in mind. When her voice came on, singing her part, he couldn’t hold his tears back anymore. For them, there was no more tomorrow. He looked down at his hand and took off the ring he wore on his last finger that day. He had wanted to give the ring to Chaerin when he confessed his feeling to her. The matching ring, he had already been wearing it on his ring finger for a while.

 

He clenched his fist around the ring, held it close to his heart and cried like he had never done before.

 

Sorry Chaerin, I should have told you earlier.

Sorry Jiyong, for you have lost the other half of yourself.

 

15 minutes later, he heard his phone beep and he checked his phone. He would never tell anyone but he had hoped that it would be Chaerin telling him it was all a lie and they just wanted to get a reaction out of him. But it was just Xin messaging him to tell him that both Soo Hyuk and him were on their way over. He wiped the tears from his face and told himself to hold it together until he got home.

 

He unclenched his fist to see the ring. He knew he won’t throw the ring away. He took off the necklace that Chaerin had customized for his birthday that year and put the ring through so that it was now a pendant. He put the necklace back on and to his surprise he realized that the position of the ring was very near to his heart. He let out a mocking laugh.

 

Sorry my heart, you would be reminded of how stupid I am every time.

Sorry my heart, you would be hurting for a long time to come.

 

If it had been any other guy, Jiyong knew he would stand a chance. But because it was Youngbae, he knew that his chances was near zero.

 

Chaerin ah, you left me without any hope.

I can’t decide if you are being kind or not.

Right now, all I can say is that you are one cruel gizibe.

 

Jiyong shut down the studio, and something in his heart also clicked. He had switched his heart off too. Until the day that Chaerin walked the aisle to her husband-to-be, Jiyong vowed to be waiting. If there is ever a chance that he could be with her, he was not going to give up. He knew it was too late but he didn’t want to give up.

 

In his mind a voice was scolding him for being silly. His heart retorted.

 

I have been silly for so long, what’s the difference?

 

His phone beeped again. He took a look at the screen and quickly unlocked his phone to check the message, her message.

 

FROM: CHAERINNIE

Oppa! Thanks for asking me to do the collaboration with you. It’s been a while since we did anything together. I don’t know if this is too much to ask but would you consider not putting the song in your album?

 

Jiyong had to blink twice to make sure that he read it correctly. He could feel his brain rejecting what he was reading because this felt like a direct rejection from her. It’s like she wanted nothing to do with him. Even on the professional level. Though he knew he was getting his own kicked, he still wanted to know the reason.

 

TO: CHAERINNIE

Why? Is Youngbae not happy with it? I can talk to him about it.

 

FROM: CHAERINNIE

Oh no no, Bae oppa has nothing to do with it. It’s just that the lyrics and the whole vibe of the song. I just don’t want people to get the wrong idea about us.

 

Kwon Jiyong, you idiot. Did you really need to hear that?

 

TO: CHAERINNIE

I’d see what I can do. I don’t really have time to find someone else to re-record the song with me.

 

FROM: CHAERINNIE

Oh… I’m sorry for asking then. It’s alright then. Anyway, oppa, don’t work too late. You need to rest since you have so many schedules. See you soon~

 

TO: CHAERINNIE

Does this mean you won’t work with me anymore?

 

FROM: CHAERINNIE

No, it doesn’t mean that. It’s just that R.O.D. has that ‘We don’t give a damn what you think about us, we are just going to do whatever we want’ vibe going on. I’m sure I’m not the one you have in mind. Anyway, forget that I asked. It’s not like we have never laughed off all those silly comments about us being a couple anyway and it’s not the title song too.

 

That moment, Jiyong knew he would never be able to find any words to describe what he was feeling. The feeling of being wronged yet nothing he said would ever make things right anymore. That feeling of having so much to say yet not a single word should be said because to say it now might mean he would lose everything. He laughed at himself mockingly.

 

Kwon Jiyong, you already did.

Everything that mattered to you.

The one that mattered to you.

 

Jiyong decided that he needed that drink and he needed it bad. He got up and without bothering to pack up his bag, he left with just his phone. He didn’t need anything else because at that moment, nothing matters anymore.

 

In Youngbae’s car, Chaerin stared at the messages that she received from Jiyong. She knew it was really unreasonable for her to make that request but she wanted to know what his reaction would be. Youngbae saw that she was staring at the phone and could roughly guessed she probably exchanged messages with Jiyong.

 

“Chaerin ah, what’s wrong?”

 

She turned, smiled and shook her head to show that nothing was wrong. But Youngbae being Youngbae knew something was bothering her.

 

“Did you send a message to Jiyong?”

 

Her look of surprise told him everything he needed to know. Youngbae smiled at her and reached over to hold her hand.

 

“I know you hate it when I do this, I hate to do this too but because I really want you to be happy no matter what, so I’m going to ask this again. Do you want me to let go of you so you could walk back to Jiyong?”

 

Chaerin stared ahead. She hated it whenever Youngbae asked her this question. She felt sorry towards Youngbae, like she was only choosing him because she didn’t want to wait for Jiyong anymore. She held on to Youngbae’s hand tighter and then turned to look at him.

 

“Oppa, I feel so sorry every time you ask me that question. But at the same time, I’m a little upset because it feels like you don’t trust me at all. I have already made my decision to be with you so stop asking me that question every time we are together. Is it that easy to let go of me?”

 

“No, you have no idea how scared I am every single time when I ask you that question. I’m so afraid that one day you are going to say ‘yes’ and I won’t know what to do. But if being with me means that you are giving up the happiness that you deserve then, I would let go even if it kills me. I love you, Lee Chaerin.”

 

“Then stop asking me that question. Jiyong oppa is just an oppa to me now, someone I respect and care for as platonic friends and a senior at the company. I love you, Bae oppa. You have to believe me.”

 

“I do, it’s just that it’s too good to be true. Alright, I will not ask that question ever again.”

 

By then, they had arrived at the destination of their date: Holt Children Center. Youngbae took out the gifts that they had prepared for the children and walked into the ward. They stood close although they were not holding hands. Sean was also there with 2 of his children, Harang and Ha-el, who were super happy to see Youngbae and Chaerin.

 

“Sean hyung! It’s a surprise to see you here!”

 

“Oh, Youngbae ah, you are the surprise. Chaerin comes here often so I’m not surprised to see her. Did she influence you to come?”

 

“Sean oppa, Bae oppa likes children a lot. It’s just that it’s difficult for him to find time to come.”

 

“And yet he’s here now with you. Is there something I should know?”

 

Both of them turned to look at each other and Chaerin nodded.

 

“We are dating.”

 

“Oh wow! That’s great news! The two of you couldn’t have made a better couple! I’m happy for the two of you! Does Hyun Suk hyung know about this?”

 

“Yup~! I went to talk to him after Chaerin said ‘yes’ to me.”

 

“Good, good! I really am so happy for the two of you!”

 

“We are very happy too!”

 

“You should be~! Chaerin ah, I have another piece of good news. Doo Jun is finally going to be adopted. The parents just came and sign the papers today. They will pick him up next week.”

 

“That’s great news! Where is he?”

 

“In the next ward. He was sleeping when I came but he might be awake now.”

 

“I’d go and check on him then. Bae oppa, can you give out the gifts on your own?”

 

Youngbae nodded and Chaerin gave his hand a squeeze before she left the room. His eyes followed her out of the ward then he turned to Sean.

 

“Who is this Doo Jun?”

 

“He came here after he was abandoned by his mother. His mother just left him at the hospital and left without a word. After she heard his story, she picked him up and he started crying. But instead of handing her over to the staff here, she just continued to hold him until he stopped crying. When she saw that he stopped crying, she wiped off the tears from his face, gave him a smile then told him that she love him. A special bond between the two of them was created that day and whenever she’s free, she would make her way here just to be with him. She had not missed any of his big moments thus far.”

 

“She’s such an amazing girl.”

 

“She is. Take good care of her. How’s Jiyong? What was his reaction to the news?”

 

“I think he should be drowning his sorrows in alcohol tonight.”

 

“He waited just a tad too long. Silly boy.”

 

“His loss, my gain.”

 

Just then, Chaerin walked in carrying Doo Jun in her arms. She had a look of amazement on her face that was so fascinating to Youngbae. He walked towards her and held out his hands to Doo Jun, wanting to carry him. But he turned away from Youngbae and snuggled into Chaerin’s neck. Chaerin, in turn, his back and kissed his head. Youngbae found that so adorable that he gathered the both of them in his arms and kissed Chaerin’s forehead.

 

“You look so beautiful carrying him in your arms.”

 

“Oppa, he just said his first word. He was sleeping just now but when I touched his cheeks and called his name, he woke up. When he saw me, he smiled and then said, ‘omma’. I was so surprised. Is that how parents feel when they hear their child call them for the first time?”

 

Youngbae leaned in close to whisper in Chaerin’s ear.

 

“I don’t know, how about we have a kid and then we would know?”

 

“OPPA!”

 

At Chaerin’s slight exclamation, Doo Jun turned to look at Youngbae, frowned and then moved his hand to hit Youngbae. Youngbae reacted in time to catch the baby’s hand in his. Chaerin laughed because it felt like Doo Jun was protecting her from Youngbae.

 

“Doo Jun ah, this is Youngbae hyung. He’s a very nice man. You must grow up to be like him, alright?”

 

Hearing Chaerin’s voice, Doo Jun looked at Youngbae again. He pulled his hand out from Youngbae’s hand and clung tightly to Chaerin.

 

“Doo Jun ah, don’t be rude, say hi to Youngbae hyung.”

 

“It’s ok, baby, he wants you for himself. I can understand the feeling. Doo Jun ah, I’m Youngbae hyung. If you call Chaerin ‘omma’, you would have to call me ‘appa’.”

 

“Oppa… Don’t give him the wrong ideas. Plus, he’s going to have real parents soon.”

 

Youngbae could detect the slight note of sadness in Chaerin’s voice and he embraced the two of them again, this time a little longer.

 

“You should be happy for him. He’s going to grow up a fine man with his new family.”

 

“I am but the thought that I won’t see him the next time I come here…”

 

“Shhhh.. it’s going to be alright. There are other children here who needs your love. And you have definitely done a great job with Doo Jun. He’s going to be a great baby because you have given him so much of your love and time.”

 

Chaerin nodded and then walked over to the playmat set up at the corner of the room and put Doo Jun down. She laid down on the mat and started talking to him. Youngbae was mesmerized by this new side of Chaerin that he had never seen before personally. He took out his phone and took a picture of her. He then sent her the picture with an attached message.

 

TO: MY BABY RIN

I’m so lucky to be in love with you! When will you be my children’s mummy?

 

When Chaerin checked her phone, she looked up at Youngbae and gave him a weird look. Then she typed on her phone, sent the message and went back to Doo Jun.

 

FROM: MY BABY RIN

Who says I want to be your children’s mummy? I still want it to be just the two of us for now.

 

Youngbae’s eye smile appeared on his face. He glanced over at Chaerin whose attention was totally on the baby.

 

TO: MY BABY RIN

But you would one day right?

 

Chaerin checked her message, looked at Youngbae with a cheeky smile and shrugged. She didn’t bother answering the message. He walked over to where the duo was and sat down. Doo Jun surprised the two of them by crawling towards Youngbae and then tried to climb onto his lap. Youngbae looked at Chaerin and then picked the baby up so he could sit on his lap.

 

“Youngbae, Chaerin, look here!”

 

Youngbae and Chaerin looked up and Sean took a picture of them with Doo Jun.

 

“Appa, I want to take a picture with Youngbae hyung too!”

 

“Me too! I want to take a picture with Chaerin unnie!”

 

“Harang, Ha-el, come over here then!”

 

Chaerin waved the 2 children over and they positioned themselves beside Doo Jun. Youngbae put his arms around Chaerin and she smiled up at him.

 

SNAP!

Hearing the click from the camera, Youngbae and Chaerin both looked in front for the next picture. After Sean took the second picture, he walked over to show them the photos.

 

“You guys look like a family but it seems like Chaerin has that effect on the guys she’s with. She makes them look settled down.”

 

“Oppa, I’ve only been here with you and…”

 

Chaerin stopped short. The only other person who had been here with her before was Jiyong. She remembered asking him to bring her here one day because one of the staff had messaged her about Doo Jun falling sick. In the end, Jiyong also ended up falling in love with the baby and even jokingly suggested that they should adopt him and bring him up together. Chaerin turned to look at Youngbae who simply shook his head and squeezed her shoulders to show that he was not affected by it.

 

“Hyung, can you send us the pictures?”

 

“I’m uploading one of them onto my Instagram.”

 

“Sure, it shouldn’t be a problem since Harang and Ha-el are in the picture as well.”

 

“Bae oppa, can you send me the picture that you took of me and Doo Jun? I want to put that on my Instagram.”

 

“Sure. Here, take one of me and Doo Jun too.”

 

After the photos were taken and exchanged, Youngbae and Chaerin got ready to leave. This was only the first part of their date and they were glad that they came that day, if not, they won’t have been able to spend time with Doo Jun for the last time. When Chaerin gave Doo Jun back to the staff, he started crying and kept reaching out for Chaerin. Youngbae saw it and suggested that they stayed till the baby was asleep. He knew that Chaerin won’t feel good if she left him crying.

 

When the baby finally stopped crying and fall asleep in Chaerin’s arms, Chaerin walked to Doo Jun’s bed to put him down. But she didn’t really want to let him go. She turned to look for Youngbae and found him right behind her. He her back, trying to ease the pain that she felt and whispering to her.

 

“He’s going to be alright. You can ask the staff to ask the parents if you could visit him once in a while.”

 

Chaerin nodded and she put Doo Jun gently onto the bed. She bent down and gave him a kiss on his forehead.

 

“Doo Jun ah, stay healthy and happy. Thank you for all the joy you have brought to me whenever I come and visit you. See you soon, alright?”

 

After kissing him one last time, Chaerin went to talk to the staff and gave her personal number to them. She told the staff to pass her number to Doo Jun’s new parents and if they were ok with contacting her, she would like to stay in touch with Doo Jun. The staff promised to do that. Chaerin thanked them and they finally left Holt. The two of them walked back to Youngbae’s car. The moment they were inside, Chaerin leaned in to give Youngbae a hug.

 

“Oppa, thank you for being so understanding just now.”

 

“Well, I got to see the motherly side of you which isn’t a bad thing at all. Shall we go to our next destination?”

 

Chaerin nodded and settled down for the ride. She looked at all the photos that they took that day and decided to upload the photo that Youngbae took of her and Doo Jun. Under the picture, she put in the caption.

 

Doo Jun ah, congratulations in finding a family who would love and care for you. When you call me ‘omma’ today, my heart was glad and sad at the same time. But I’m glad that I got to hear it at least once. Be happy, be healthy. I love you.

 

As she hit the ‘upload’ button, a tear slipped down her cheek. She couldn’t help it. Youngbae reached over and held her hand, offering quiet support. She squeezed his hand, thanking him without words. She went to Sean’s IG account because she was tagged in the photo he uploaded, liked the photo and left a message.

 

Oppa, thank you for bringing me to Holt so I got to know Doo Jun. I would continue to go in the future.

 

She scrolled through the comments below the picture and smiled when she read comments like how compatible both her and Youngbae are, how they two of them gave off the warm and cozy vibe, and how it looked like a family photo.

 

“Why are you smiling like that?”

 

“The comments on the photo that Sean oppa uploaded are rather interesting.”

 

“Oh? What did they say?”

 

“That we are very compatible, we give off a warm and cozy vibe and how it looked like a family photo.”

 

“They are right on all accounts. Chaerin ah, I wasn’t joking when I asked you the question about being the mother of my children. I know it would be a while yet but I want you to know that I went into this relationship with marriage, starting a family and growing old together with you in mind.”

 

“I know, I didn’t go into this relationship without wanting the same things too. But right now, both of us are not in the position to talk about all that yet. I feel like there’s still so much I want to know about you. I’m sure you feel the same way too.”

 

“I do, every single moment I spent with you outside of work, you never failed to surprise me. Sometimes, I would wonder what took me so long.”

 

Actually, both Youngbae and Chaerin knew exactly why he waited. She was totally focused on Jiyong and Youngbae knew to come between them spelt disaster, especially if she had to choose. So, he waited and baited his time.

 

When Youngbae heard that Jiyong had asked Chaerin to collaborate with him on R.O.D., he really thought that he had no chance anymore because he had heard the song before and Jiyong also did hint that this song was written with Chaerin in mind. However, he also noticed that with each recording of the song, Chaerin got more and more depressed.

 

One day, he happened to be passing by the studio when Chaerin walked out of it. Chaerin didn’t notice Youngbae but he could see that she was wiping tears away from her face. So he followed her. He was worried. Chaerin isn’t one to shed tears easily and since he knew she just came from Jiyong’s studio, he came to the conclusion that it probably got to do with him.

 

He found her on the rooftop, all huddled up on the bench and sobbing her heart out. He did fight with himself on whether he should go and ask Jiyong what he did but was stopped when Chaerin suddenly looked up at him.

 

“Don’t. I know what you are thinking. Don’t do it. Don’t go and ask him what’s wrong. He doesn’t know. HE DOESN’T KNOW!! That’s the damn problem!!”

 

Youngbae walked up to her and embraced her. Chaerin continued sobbing. All Youngbae could do was offer comfort by being there. When he felt that she had stopped crying, he pulled back so that he could see her face.

 

“Chaerin ah, have you ever wondered that maybe if you tell him, he would know and both of you won’t be this miserable? You can’t expect him to know how you feel. If you are worried about upsetting what you have now, I’m sure he has the same fears. So why not just confess and see where that gets you?”

 

“Bae oppa, it’s no use. He’s still with Kiko. I heard them over the phone just now. So I’ve been wrong about them breaking up after all.”

 

“But…”

 

“I’m done, I’m done with this feeling of weakness whenever it comes to him. I’m going to let go of him now.”

 

“Are you sure? The two of you…”

 

“Stop. Oppa, I don’t want to hear it. I’d be alright after a while. Don’t ever tell Jiyong oppa about this. He doesn’t need to be burdened with my emotions, especially if he’s still with Kiko.”

 

Youngbae nodded, not because he saw it as a chance for him but he knew that once Chaerin resolved to do something, no one can stop her. Though he felt sorry for Jiyong, he knew that he should have acted when the time was ripe instead of letting his fear take over.

 

“Oppa, it’s the green light.”

 

Youngbae turned to smile at her and continued driving towards their 2nd destination. Within 15 minutes, they arrived. It was a cafe that was owned by Chaerin’s friend and since there was an area that was specially kept away from the public, it was the perfect place for them to have their date.

 

But instead of going to the private room, they headed to the kitchen first. They were going to cook a dish for each other. They got started on their dish and enjoyed a good time teasing each other, tasting each other’s food. When they were done, they brought the food to the private room reserved for them and started eating.

 

Halfway into the meal, Chaerin’s phone rang and when she saw who was calling, she frowned. Nonetheless, she answered the call.

 

“Seungho oppa, what’s up?”

 

“Chaerin ah, where are you?”

 

“I’m out with Youngbae oppa. Why?”

 

“Why didn’t you pick up Jiyong’s calls?”

 

“We were in the kitchen cooking so I didn’t hear my phone. What’s wrong?”

 

“He saw the photos of the both of you at Holt’s but most importantly, he saw the comments on Sean hyung’s IG photo of you two. If you can, can you please give him a call or better yet, can you come over?”

 

Chaerin looked over at Youngbae who just gave her an encouraging smile.

 

“Seungho oppa, are you still with him? Can you just pass the phone over to him? It’s not fair for me to leave Youngbae oppa and go to him just because he’s in a mood.”

 

“Alright, I’d pass the phone to him. Talk to him nicely, he’s not doing well right now.”

 

After a pause, Jiyong came onto the phone.

 

“Lee Chaerin, why did you not pick up my calls?”

 

“Jiyong oppa, I was cooking just now and I didn’t hear the phone ring. What is the matter?”

 

“Did you cook for Youngbae? Did you?”

 

“Yes, he cooked for me too. That was what we wanted to do for each other.”

 

“Chaerin, can you not be with Youngbae?”

 

“Jiyong oppa…”

 

“Please… I can’t bear it. You should be mine.”

 

“Oppa…”

 

“I want to see you! Where are you?”

 

“Oppa, I’m on a date with Bae oppa…”

 

“NO! You have to come to me!! Or I’d go to you. Where are you?”

 

Chaerin looked at Youngbae, sending out a signal for help. Youngbae took the phone from her and when she looked at him worriedly, he put his arm around her shoulders to reassure her that he’s not going to do anything rash.

 

“LEE CHAERIN!! ANSWER ME!!”

 

“Jiyong ah, stop. You are upsetting Chaerin. We will go over later. You stay where you are.”

 

“Bae, I can’t do without her. Give her back to me.”

 

“She’s not a toy. She will make her own decisions. See you later and try to be sober when we get there.”

 

Youngbae ended the call before Jiyong could respond. He was angry with Jiyong for upsetting Chaerin. He looked down at the shocked girl in his arms and drew her closer.

 

“It’s alright, I’m here with you. Can you message Seungho and ask him to keep Jiyong at home? I don’t want him to be out and about. Tell him we will go over once we are done cleaning up here.”

 

“Oppa…”

 

“Shhhhh… You don’t have to say anything. It’s not your fault that Jiyong is behaving in this manner. He had his chances but he didn’t act upon it. This talk cannot be avoided, so we might as well have it out of the way.”

 

Chaerin nodded. She knew that it was something they have to face but then again, she really didn’t know how to handle the situation. She looked up at Youngbae and when he leaned down to kiss her, she held onto him tighter and kissed him back. But before the kiss could get deeper, Chaerin’s phone beeped. It was a message from Xin.

 

FROM: SEUNGHO OPPA

Chae, you’d better come quick. Ji was going to leave his house to go look for you. Soo Hyuk managed to calm him down. Just come quick and get this over and done with.

 

TO: SEUNGHO OPPA

Ok, we are on our way.

 

Youngbae got up and started clearing the dishes. He brought them to the kitchen then came back for Chaerin. He went to her and pulled her into a hug before they left the private enclave.

 

“Let’s go.”

 

Chaerin nodded in Youngbae’s embrace then released him to pick up her bag. Before they left the room, she turned round and gave him another peck on the lips.

 

“Oppa, thank you.”

 

Youngbae just smiled at her and then she led the way out of the cafe to his car. Once they were on their way, Chaerin sent Jiyong a message.

 

TO: JIYONG OPPA

Oppa, we are on our way to your place. Please stay at home.

 

FROM: JIYONG OPPA

Ok. I’d be waiting for you.

 

The drive to Jiyong’s place was filled with silence. Both Youngbae and Chaerin were deep in their own thoughts. But when they arrived at Jiyong’s place, they turned to look at each other. Chaerin took Youngbae’s hand in hers.

 

“Oppa, no matter what happens in Jiyong oppa’s house, you must know that you are the one that I want now. Whatever feelings I might have for Jiyong oppa in the past is in the past and maybe part of it will never go away. But it makes me treasure you more. I hope you know and understand that.”

 

“Like I said just now, that was the last time I ask if you want me to let go of you so you could go to Jiyong. I’m not going to give you up. He would eventually have to come to terms with our relationship. It would be shaky at first but nothing we can’t get through. We will also have to help Jiyong deal with the situation.”

 

“I just didn’t expect him to react in this manner.”

 

“To be honest, if you were to go into a relationship with him, I would behave in this manner too. But because I know you have made your choice, I would get over it eventually. But it might be harder for him to let go. Deep down, he loves you, more than he ever know so it will be difficult.”

 

“You mean you don’t love me as much he does?”

 

“No, it means that what he’s feeling right now has got regret mixed in so it would be difficult to let go. For me, I’ve always been on the sidelines waiting. The reason why I waited is because I know you have your eyes on him and to confess to you would just make it difficult for you and I didn’t want to put you through that.”

 

“But you were ready to let me go to him if he confessed to me?”

 

“Chaerin, you love him a lot, we all know that. If he confessed to you, you would have been the happiest woman on earth. Who am I to deny you of that happiness?”

 

“Oppa…”

 

“But you are mine now. I’m not letting you go to him anymore. Ready?”

 

“As ready as I can be. I have never been in this situation before.”

 

“Neither have I.”

 

The two of them laughed out loud at this, relieving some of the tension that the two of them had been feeling. Youngbae was relieved to say what he wanted to say. Although he was still a little apprehensive about how Chaerin would react to Jiyong, he was somewhat reassured now that they had this conversation.

 

Unknown to them, Jiyong had been waiting for them to arrive. When he saw Youngbae’s car, he had gone outside to greet the two of them. But he stopped when he saw Chaerin move to take Youngbae’s hand. Though he couldn’t hear what they were saying but when he saw them laughing at the end, he knew that whatever they were talking about, it was something they wanted. Somehow he knew that he didn’t come out winning in that conversation. He was going to wait at the door but when he saw that Youngbae was leaning in to kiss Chaerin, he rushed to the car and tapped on Chaerin’s side of the car.

 

When the occupants of the car heard the tapping, they stopped in their tracks and looked towards the window only to see the stern face on Jiyong. They looked at each other, Youngbae leaned over to kiss Chaerin’s forehead and then got ready to get out of the car. Seeing this, Jiyong opened Chaerin’s car door and extended his hand to help her out of the car. Chaerin looked at his hand, then looked up at him, only to come face-to-face with his pleading eyes. She looked away, searching for Youngbae.

 

“Ji, don’t make a scene. Chaerin can get out of the car herself.”

 

Jiyong didn’t take his eyes away from Chaerin. He couldn’t.

 

“Jiyong oppa, I can…”

 

“Chae… please…”

 

“Oppa, let’s go inside first.”

 

When Jiyong didn’t move, Chaerin finally put her hand in his and he held on to it tightly. But the moment Chaerin got out of the car, she tried to snatch her hand away from his.

 

“Oppa, please…”

 

“Ji, let go of her. Can you see she’s uncomfortable with this? Please don’t make this difficult. Come on, let’s go inside first.”

 

Jiyong looked at Chaerin and he could see the discomfort showing in her eyes and the frown on her face. This was something he wasn’t used to seeing on her. Whenever he was with her, she was always laughing and smiling.

 

Except that one time when he got a call from Kiko and she left the studio suddenly.

 

He let go of her hand. Chaerin took the chance to step away from Jiyong and walked closer to Youngbae. She hooked her arm through Youngbae’s and smiled up at him. Youngbae smiled back at her and her hair, as if telling her she had done well. The two of them walked into the house with Jiyong trailing behind them.

 

The moment Chaerin walked into the house, Xin and Soo Hyuk heaved a sigh of relief. Although the two of them already knew about Chaerin and Youngbae being a couple but it was their first time seeing them as a couple. When they hear the door close loudly, they all took a deep breath, preparing themselves for the confrontation that was bound to happen.

 

“Chaerin ah, take a seat. Do you want a drink?”

 

“Jiyong oppa, water would be fine. Bae oppa, do you want anything?”

 

“I’d just share with you.”

 

“Chae doesn’t like to share her food with others. I’d get you a separate bottle.”

 

With that said, Jiyong walked to the kitchen to get the water for his guests. He was still trying to calm down after hearing Youngbae say that he would share Chaerin’s drink. But his blood was set boiling again when he came back to the living room to see that Chaerin was sitting on Youngbae’s lap and talking animatedly with Xin and Soo Hyuk. And the moment he was spotted coming into the room, the conversation stopped. He glanced over at Chaerin and Youngbae, no, he actually glared at them.

 

“Chaerin ah, there are plenty of seats around, why do you have to sit on Youngbae’s lap?”

 

Chaerin frowned then she turned to look at Youngbae, then back at Jiyong.

 

“Do you have to ask permission from Youngbae for everything now?”

 

“It’s not asking permission, it’s just me not understanding what is wrong with me sitting on Bae oppa’s lap.”

 

“Ji, you would have to get used to it. We are not going to act differently in front of you or in front of friends.”

 

“I won’t have to get used to it if Chaerin decides to be with me instead.”

 

At that statement, Jiyong and Youngbae went into a staring match. Chaerin looked at Jiyong, then at Youngbae before putting her hand on his cheek and pushed his face towards her instead. When he took his eyes away from Jiyong and looked at her, she smiled at him, thus breaking the tension. In that look, she was asking him to trust her and let her handle this situation. Youngbae nodded and then when Chaerin made her move to stand up, Youngbae released her.

 

Chaerin turned to look at Jiyong, took a deep breath. She really didn’t want to hurt him but she also didn’t want to give him false hope as well. She walked up to him but when he reached out for her, she shook her head and stopped.

 

“Jiyong oppa, I’m sorry if what I’m going to say will hurt you but I think it’s fairer to you if I’m honest about it. To be very honest, I have loved you for a very long time…”

 

“Chaerin ah…”

 

“No, let me finish. And as I told Bae oppa just now, it would remain a part of me. Right now, you are a close oppa and a dear colleague to me and Youngbae oppa is the one I choose to go into a relationship with. Both of us didn’t go into this relationship without thinking it through and if you think this is a rebound from me falling out of love for you, it’s not. I’m not such a person.”

 

“But Chaerin, I love you too! I was planning on telling you about my feelings tonight!”

 

“Oppa, it’s too late. If you have said it 5 month ago, maybe things might turn out to be different. But now, no matter what you say, it’s too late.”

 

“What happened 5 months ago? Why did you decide that enough was enough? That is what I do not understand.”

 

“Every single time I’m with you, I wish you would say or do something to show that you like me more than just a colleague or a little sister. But after 3 years of waiting, I just don’t think I can do it anymore. The phone call you got from Kiko was pretty much the reason why I decide to end this one-sided love I have for you.”

 

“But there’s nothing going on between me and Kiko!!”

 

“Then who’s the girl in R.O.D.? You obviously have someone in mind.”

 

“You. The song was written for you, with you in mind!! It has always been you!!”

 

“Then why didn’t you say something about it? Now, it’s too late.”

 

“It’s not too late!! Don’t keep saying it’s too late. As long as you give me a chance…”

 

“Oppa, it is too late. I have made my choice and it is Youngbae oppa.”

 

Jiyong didn’t know what to say to this. The resolute tone that Chaerin used was more of a strike than the words she used. He looked at her and he could see she was controlling her tears because she knew if she were to let them fall, it would just make him feel awful at his missed opportunity with her.

 

Chaerin didn’t like the defeated look on Jiyong’s face and she wished fervently with all her heart that she wasn’t the one who put it there. But the truth was it made her uncomfortable and her heart was pained.

 

It could have been so good, Jiyong oppa…

But I have found my happiness…

Hope you would find yours too soon…

 

Youngbae got up from his seat and went to gather Chaerin in his arms. The moment she felt his arms around her, she let herself snuggle into his warmth and her tears fell. She knew she was safe in his arms and he would understand her tears. He soothed her with gentle down her back.

 

“Jiyong…”

 

At hearing Youngbae calling his name, Jiyong turned to look at him. The sight of Chaerin in Youngbae’s arms and how she seek comfort from him hurt. He had to blink fast so that the tears gathered won’t fall. But he knew that he couldn’t hide away from reality forever. When he looked at Youngbae again, he got a smile from him.

 

“I won’t say I’m sorry because being with Chaerin is the best thing that happened to me. I won’t say you should have acted and not waited till it’s too late, because you already know that. It might take some time for you to get used to the idea that Chaerin is in a relationship with me but it is something you have to get used to because we are not going to let go of each other.”

 

Hearing Youngbae’s words made Chaerin hold on to him tighter. The little movement wasn’t lost on Jiyong. He knew that it was a lost cause then and the only thing he could do was wish his two best friends happiness. He started to say something but the words were stuck in his throat. Youngbae shook his head, silently telling his best friend that no words were needed at that moment because he knew how difficult it was for him. Jiyong nodded in understanding.

 

Youngbae leaned closer to Chaerin and whispered to her.

 

“Baby, let’s go. I think we are done here. Jiyong needs some time on his own.”

 

Chaerin nodded and pulled herself out of Youngbae’s embrace. Youngbae passed her his handkerchief so she could wipe away her tears. When she was done, she turned to Xin and Soo Hyuk and they nodded. They knew what she was asking of them but they have no intention of leaving Jiyong alone anyway. Then she turned and walked towards Jiyong. She surprised him when she gave him a hug. Though caught by surprise, Jiyong recovered quick enough and hugged her close too.

 

“Oppa, I know it’s too much to ask, wanting everything to stay the same but you are still my best friend and I really don’t want that to change. I want your blessings one day because it would mean a lot to both me and Youngbae oppa.”

 

“Chaerin, just answer me this one question. Would you have accepted my confession if you weren’t in a relationship with Youngbae right now?”

 

“No, if you have confessed 6 months ago, I would have been the happiest girl alive like Youngbae oppa said. But when I decided that I have waited enough and just want the platonic relationship with you, that’s the end of it.”

 

“But it was all a misunderstanding. I wasn’t with Kiko and she was just calling to tell me about her new boyfriend.”

 

“Kiko wasn’t the only reason. Because you took so long, it did make me wonder if what you felt towards me was strong enough, you would have made the move. You are not one to sit on your feelings, that I know very well.”

 

“I was just so afraid that I would lose you if you didn’t feel the same towards me!”

 

“It was the same for me. I guess both of us were just not brave enough.”

 

The two of them held on to each other, both mourning the what could have been. But maybe it was for the best. When Chaerin moved to step back, Jiyong panicked and held onto her tighter. He shook his head and his tears fell onto Chaerin’s shoulders. Chaerin bit her lips and looked up at Youngbae for help. Youngbae walked towards Jiyong and put a hand on his shoulders. Jiyong shook his head again. He simply didn’t want to let go.

 

“Jiyong ah, you have to let go. You know that you are just making things difficult for Chaerin.”

 

Xin finally spoke up because he knew that it was difficult for Youngbae to say anything since one is his girlfriend and the other is his best friend.

 

“Holding onto her now isn’t going to change a thing. You had your chances, you didn’t take it, end of story.”

 

Soo Hyuk had always been the direct one in their group. And he couldn’t bear to see Chaerin being put in a spot too. He looked over at Youngbae and all he could think of was he was a lucky man.

 

“Jiyong oppa, the last thing I want to do is hurt you. I know you are hurting right now but it will go away one day especially when you find someone who you can share your happiness with. I will still be here, this won’t be the last time I would give you a hug when you need it.”

 

“Are you not hurting right now, Chae?”

 

Chaerin smiled a sad smile, which Jiyong couldn’t see but Youngbae did. The two of them exchanged a look, Chaerin’s smile changed to a brighter one when she looked at Youngbae.

 

“I am, but it’s for hurting you. I’m not thinking of what might have been if we had been honest with each other. And right now, I have Bae oppa who I know would comfort me. As much as I would like to be your comfort, there’s only that much I can do as a friend and colleague. So, don’t hurt and don’t dwell in the what could have been anymore. You will find someone who would be your comfort, strength and so much more one day.”

 

“Why can’t you be the one?”

 

“Oppa…”

 

Jiyong loosened his hold on Chaerin but he didn’t let go of her. Instead, he just moved back enough so that he could see her face. He could see the unshed tears in her eyes and the slight smile. It was sad but she was doing her best to not let it affect him. Even though it hurt, he forced himself to put on a smile for her. But he couldn’t stop the tears that insisted on making their entrance.

 

That was the breaking point for Chaerin. Her tears slid down, mocking the smile she tried to put on for Jiyong’s sake. Jiyong moved his hands to cup her face and use his thumbs to wipe away her tears. The hot tears burned his fingers and Jiyong made his decision there and then. He had to let her go even if it killed him inside. He couldn’t bear to see her crying. He drew her face close then gave her a gentle kiss on her forehead and held her close.

 

“Alright, I would let you go. I can’t bear to see you cry. I do not want to be the cause of your tears. For all those tears that you had shed because of me, I’m sorry. Be happy, alright?”

 

Chaerin nodded. Even though it was the most difficult thing that Jiyong had to do, he finally released her. Chaerin walked towards Youngbae and he hugged her close to his side.

 

“You alright, baby? You did well. I’m so proud of you.”

 

“Oppa, thank you, thank you for trusting me to be able to handle the situation. I love you.”

 

“I love you too, baby~ Shall we go?”

 

Chaerin nodded and turned to Jiyong, Xin and Soo Hyuk.

 

“Oppas, I’m going to make a move. Jiyong oppa, thank you. I’d see you at the company soon?”

 

“Chaerin ah, don’t be out till late, you have an early schedule tomorrow.”

 

“Seungho oppa, I know, we are going back now.”

 

“Bae, please take good care of Chaerin and give her the happiness she deserves.”

 

“I will, Ji.”

 

Youngbae released Chaerin to give Jiyong a hug.

 

“Take care of yourself and don’t drink too much. Chaerin will worry about you. She is in good hands.”

 

Jiyong nodded, knowing that Chaerin is in good hands with Youngbae. But the regret that it could have been him was still there and the wound was still fresh. Nonetheless, he had promised that he would let her go. He would handle the pain on his own.

 

Jiyong sent Youngbae and Chaerin to the door. Before leaving, Chaerin turned to give Jiyong, Xin and Soo Hyuk a hug each then smiled and left with Youngbae. As they watched the car drive off, the three of them all sighed.

 

“Lucky Youngbae with his impeccable timing.”

 

“I know right? If I know that you were going to mess up, I would have stayed closer to her.”

 

“I’m with her almost every day yet I didn’t even realize it.”

 

“Guys, you are not helping to make me feel better. You mean all of you had your eyes on Chaerin all this while?”

 

“Dude, are you blind? Wait, you must be otherwise you would have seen how much she adored and wanted you to be her boyfriend.”

 

“Why didn’t you guys say something, anything?”

 

“Well, if you were not going to realize it yourself, why should we tell you? Anyway, let’s have one more drink and then call it a night. Ji, please don’t drink too much. That girl will worry her little head over you and she won’t feel good if she’s the reason why you are drinking. You know how much she hates it.”

 

“I won’t. Like I said, I won’t do anything to make her cry. What is this? She’s not my girlfriend and I’m still worried about making her cry.”

 

“Welcome to the power of Lee Chaerin. She makes you want to do things you never thought you would.”

 

“So, what are we going to wear for her wedding?”

 

“Oh, please don’t go there. I’m not ready to let her be married to Youngbae yet. I don’t even want to imagine them kissing or… ARGH!! YANG SEUNGHO!! WHAT THE HELL?!!!”

 

Soo Hyuk laughed at Jiyong’s expression but the next moment, it hit him as well. Chaerin kissing Youngbae and more was not something he wanted to think about too.

 

“Ok, I think I need that drink right now.”

 

All 3 men nodded and poured each other a drink, vowing never to talk about Chaerin for the rest of the night.

 

They broke the vow 3 drinks later.

 

---

Author's Note: A one-shot I wrote some time back. As the foreword said, I simply decide to not have the main lead get what he wants. I know. I'm mean, but why should people who does not treasure who they have around them be allowed to have it all?