There are somethings you never encounter in nature.

Like a green sky. 

Unicorns.

Or a panda riding a bicycle.

Having the Kim family and Hwang family sitting together to have brunch feels like a panda riding a bicycle under a green sky amongst a herd of unicorns.

It's just such a bizarre sight.

We are occupying a table at one of the restaurants in downtown Seoul. My father is talking in a monotonous drone to Mr Hwang who is politely nodding. Aunt Maggie and Patrick are in their own little world quietly arguing about whether he is or isn't allowed to eat cheese because his cholesterol is high and the doctor said to avoid it but he has been good with his diet so far and a little won't hurt and "God damn it Maggie, a man was born to eat cheese...". Maggie then rather unceremoniously stuffs the piece of cheese into and - well, that's the end of that story. Judy has surprisingly found a kindred soul in the form of my mother. They exchange the latest health clinics, face lifts and botox trends. 

And halmeoni...I mean Madam Hwang, has chosen a seat specifically next to me. Which is making me slightly uncomfortable. Plus she keeps squinting and shooting me little beady looks. 

I think she's warming up to me.

The other diners are politely keeping to themselves although I do see a few people staring in interest. Leo and Michelle are flying back to America in a couple of days along with Jason and Judy. Patrick and Maggie are staying for a few weeks extra.

But the most joyous news that I've heard today is Madame Hwang is joining them. 

I mean, it's unfortunate. I would love for her to stay longer.

"You and Tiffany should really come and visit, Taeyeon." Michelle says over a plate of tuna salad. "Jason and I will take you around. It will be fun!"

"Yup! LA is an amazing place. It's huge and there are so many things to see and do." Jason chips in. 

Leo who is helping himself to the leftovers on Tiffany's plate adds a muffled, "Yshh plllb cwwmmm." Which I'm assuming is "Yes. Please come."

"We'll see guys." Tiffany replies. "It's going to be a busy few months for us."

She meets my gaze as though to confirm it.

I nod and add, "But we'll definitely visit. Maybe not immediately but certainly in the future."

There is a grunt of disapproval beside me. 

The old lady grumbles, "Don't know how long I have left...taking my granddaughter away..."

Michelle and Jason exchange uncomfortable looks. Leo snorts and hurriedly grabs a glass of water. 

"So the weather..." Jason begins awkwardly. "...has been pretty cold."

"Um...yes" Michelle joins in. "Freezing."

I take a sip of coffee and check my phone.

There is a text from an unknown number.

'Queen bee to the hive.'

Huh? Must be a mistake. I ignore the message and listen to Tiffany tell Aunt Maggie about a newly opened fashion store in Gangnam.

Another one arrives.

'Eagle to the nest. The hatchlings are waiting.'

Looks like some prank. I delete the messages and place my phone down when it bleeps again.

This time it's from Mr Lim.

'A few of the board members want to meet up. We are in the same restaurant. At a table in the very back.'

I stifle a groan. Why are they here? Couldn't this wait? Not to mention my father, Mr Hwang and Tiffany will all recognize the board members.

'People will see you!' I type back.

'They are under disguise. We will be waiting.'

I scan the room surreptitiously. Nothing seems out of place. There is happy banter and good food being enjoyed. 

I clear my throat. "Excuse me a moment. Too much coffee." 

I leave the table and make my way to the back. If their wearing a disguise it may be difficult for me to spot - 

Aish! Those pabos!

If being incognito was their intention, they went the completely opposite way.

Mr Kang is sporting a blond wig - which doesn't suit him at all and frankly draws even more attention to the table. Mr Park is wearing a thick pair of sunglasses with a gold rim - indoors. Mrs Bae is wearing an all black ensemble complete with a black beanie cap. 

Right. If I could turn around and leave this instant, I would.

The waiting staff are trying not to openly gawk. A few diners seated close by are giggling behind their menu. At least Mr Lim is dressed in a casual shirt and trousers. 

Mr Kang spots me and waves me over. I see an unlit pipe in his hand.

"What are you doing here?" I hiss under my breath. I prop my arm up on the table to keep my face hidden. 

"We are -" Mr Kang pauses for effect and places the pipe in his mouth. "- the emergency committee."

I look around the table.

We're doomed.

"May I ask what's with the outfit choices?" I try to keep my patience.

"You know..." Mr Kang's eyes dart around suspiciously. "To  stay undercover."

"By sticking out like a sore thumb?" I retort.

"It's a bit of a novelty for the board members. It's the most excitement some of them have had in years." Mr Lim says pleasantly. His expression turns serious. "If you are worried about being found out- " He takes something from his pocket. "Here."

And sticks a tiny moustache above my lip. 

"Now no one will know." His face breaks into a smile. I bet he's very pleased with himself right now.

"Ha. Ha." I blow the moustache off.

Enough of fun and games. "So have you found out who's the leak yet?" I ask.

He shakes his head. "No. But I do have a few leads -" He halts abruptly as a waitress approaches. 

"May I take your order?" She notices Mr Kang's pipe. "Sir, there is no smoking allowed I'm afraid."

Mr Kang immediately puffs his chest out. "What do you mean? Do you know who I am?"

"No. She doesn't need to know who you are." Mr Park snaps. "That's the whole point!"

Mr Lim cordially smiles at the waitress. "I think we need a moment to decide."

When she leaves, he continues where he left off. "We are looking into select employee histories. I think we may get lucky. Once we have the leak, they have no case."

"If we succeed in time." I mutter doubtfully. "I still can't understand how they could have a legitimate case in the first place."

Mr Lim rubs his thumb and index finger together. "Money. Quite a few highly placed people in the judiciary system have been bribed."

"Maybe we should counter bribe them?" Mrs Bae suggests.

"No." Mr Lim says firmly. "If it gets revealed that our company was involved in a bribery scandal, it would do unspeakable damage."

There is a murmur of agreement.

"So why are you all here?" I add.

Mrs Bae pipes up. "For a progress report."

"So any progress?" Mr Kang peers at me.

I stare back. "No." I'm still not happy about this obtrusion into my personal life.

Mr Park leans in. His oversized glasses droop down his nose. 

"And we have purchased items to aid you in... er...to aid you in - "

"Yes, I get it. Thank you." I stop him. 

He slides a shoe box sized parcel towards me. 

"How am I just going to walk back with a random box in my hand?" I observe dryly.

"Say it's a gift from one of your fan clubs." Mr Lim has a little grin on his face. "I hear many are blossoming."

 

I return to the table and place the box on the floor next to my ankle. 

"What's that?" Tiffany asks.

"A gift from one of our fanclubs"

"Whoa! You have fanclubs?" Leo exclaims. "Amazing!"

Right when I'm about to change the topic, Madam Hwang croaks, "What's in it?" She picks up the box I almost leap out and grab it from her.

God knows what the 'emergency team' put in there.

"I'm not sure."  I try to sound normal as possible. "But we'll have a look when we get back."

"Open it." She demands and pushes it towards Michelle.

I swear this woman exists to make my life difficult.

I brace myself for an embarrassing scene. Hopefully, there isn't anything too scandalous in there. Like maybe scented candles, or romantic music, or...

Who am I kidding, it's bound to be horrendous.

"Why don't you open it, Tiffany? It is your present after all!" Michelle moves the box along to Tiffany. 

Tiffany peels off the wrapping and takes the first glance inside the box before slamming the lid back on.

"What's wrong?" Jason asks.

"Nothing." She replies. Her face and neck starts to colour. She looks at me stunned.

"So what did they give you?" Patrick asks from across the table. 

"A book." Tiffany finally says. "Really nice of them."

"The box was a little big for a book." Judy points out. 

"Oh...yes." Tiffany grapples for an answer. "And there was bottle of perfume too."

I can tell she's making this up.

"I love reading!" Mr Hwang says. "Can I have a look?"

Great. Everyone is waiting expectantly. She glances at me for help.

I have to do something.

"Everyone, if I could have your attention." I hear myself say. 'I have a few words to say.'

What am I talking about? I have no words to say.

Playing for time, I stand up and smoothen my dress. 

Oh God. What am I doing?

Come on, Taeyeon. Think. 

"I would like to thank the Hwang family for welcoming me and my parents as one of their own. I am grateful and honoured." I bow.

From the corner of my eye, I see Tiffany tuck the box under her arm and excuse herself. "I left something in the car. I'll be back." She murmurs to Michelle and Jason. 

"So I would like to propose a toast." I raise my glass and all the attention is once again upon me. "To family."

"To family." Echoes around the table. A tiny sigh of relief escapes me. No one is asking about the gift anymore. My parents look a bit gobsmacked. They haven't in their lives heard me utter such things. Meanwhile, all the Hwang's expressions are suffused with joy.

Except for one.

As I slip back into my seat, Madam Hwang regards me with a hawk-like stare. 

"I'm watching you, Gim Tae Ong.”

“Kim Taeyeon.” I correct her.

“Kang Taeyeon.”

“Kim Taeyeon.”

“Kim Bap Yeon.”

 Never mind...

 

 

"I never thought fansites would be that bold. They are usually so sweet." Tiffany muses in the car. 

There was no book or perfume in that box but some dress or something. I didn't really take a good look.

I keep my eyes on the road. "I think it was meant to be a funny wedding present. Like a gag."

"That explains a lot."

I stop the car at a traffic light. "Just throw it away when we get back."

Tiffany runs her fingers through her hair and says nonchalantly, "Hmm...I don't know Tae. You'd look pretty cute in that bunny outfit..."

Omo!