Luhan POV

Here I am, cried again like a crazy man. Yeah, only she could make me suffer like this. It’s her, my beloved girl back then. How could you do this to me… Jaemi?

 ‘Oh God, only saying her name could make me hard to breathe. Why should she had a big effect in my life?’ I thought.

Why didn’t you let me tell the truth first? It’s too late now. I disappointed, I regretted what I did, which make her got wrong means. I want to throw my body out of this building, if that help me to forget those terrible memories.

“Arrgghhhh!!!” I ruffled my hair. Why couldn’t I forget all of our memories? Is it too precious? Some are sweet and precious. In other hand, it was so bitter and sad. But it’s no use now. All of our bittersweet memories are such a waste.

Five years wasn't short period of time, right?

So, tell me. Tell me how to forget all of those damn memories! Someone please teach me how to forget her.

For God's sake, I wanted to get rid all thorough this. I’m tired, really.

It’s already five ing years without Jaemi presence. How could I live without her?

‘But you still live until now, Luhan’ a voice said.

Where did this voice come from? Aish molla!

Hell, I didn’t feel like living.

Is this called life though? I woke up in the morning, went to work, cried all night long until sleep, and did the same routine again for this past 5 years. It's like I life for nothing. I life to waited when is the time to be the end of my life.

Cold Luhan is still alive, but the warm and real Luhan is already gone.

‘If I die, it would be better.’ I thought.

Why would I think such a thing? That’s because I didn’t feel like living at all. This world seems like hell.

Author POV

“Luhan-ya! Say aaa~~” Jaemi gave him a spoon of rice with meat while chuckled.

Luhan obediently opened his mouth to eat the food that his girlfriend made special for him.

‘This is heaven’ Luhan thought.

“Nah, now it’s your turn! Say aaa~”Luhan said.

“Aaam~” Jaemi sweetly ate.

“Why are you so cute, Jaemi-ah?” Luhan playfully messed Jaemi’s hair.

“Yah! My hair is ruined because of you!” Jaemi hit Luhan chest lightly.

“It’s okay, you still look cute baby!” he then pinched her cheek.

“Aish Luhan you’re so cheesy! Eeww~” she make disgusted look but blushed madly.

“Eeey~ but you like it right? You must see your face right now! My Jaemi is blushing~” Luhan sang the last word.

“Don’t make me more embarrassed please!” Jaemi pouted.

“Why should you feel embarrassed? You’re adorable just the way you are, you know.” Luhan said then pecked her lips.

Luhan smiled at the thought. All of their memories were still fresh in his mind.

“I think I'm going crazy now, smiling like an idiot while thinking our sweet time. Hahahahaha… hahaha… haha… haa….” Luhan said it oud loud then laughed mercilessly until he cried again.

“I'm really crazy, right?” Luhan said.

They’re used to be the happiest couple in the world, but one mistake ruined all of their relationship.

‘If only I could turn back the time’ Luhan sadly thought.

Jaemi was alone in Hongdae. She planned to buy something new in this heaven place. She loved shopping as much as she loved Luhan.

Speaking of Luhan, today he couldn’t go with her, unfortunately. He said he was busy with his new project work.

‘He is always busy, I wonder what Luhan is doing right now’ she giggled at the thought.

She went around Hongdae for two hours. She found clothes store, accessories store and many more.  After bought 2 blouses, 2 pants, 1 dress and new accessories, Jaemi felt her legs getting tired so she decided to go to the nearest café. When she entered the café, she spotted oh-so-familiar guy—Luhan— sat with a girl. That girl was so pretty with her short jet-black hair, she had cute eyes with long eyelashes, pinkish lips, and nice body.

They seem so close and happy. Jaemi heart trembled at the sight.

‘What is Luhan doing with that girl? He seems so happy and cheerful with her.’ Jaemi wondered while tried to think the positive way. Everyone could see her watery eyes at that time.

‘Luhan had acted differently these days, he is cheating on you Jaemi!’ a voice said with hint of hatred in the voice.

‘No Jaemi! Don’t thinking that way, she is maybe her relatives or something. Think positive Jaemi-ah!” another voice said in her head.

Jaemi couldn’t think further when she witnessed Luhan hug her. Someone surely could hear sound of her heart breaking at the scene.

Just then, Luhan saw her with her blank and hurt expression.

“Jaemi-ah!!! Yah~ Kim Jaemi, it’s not like what you see.” Luhan said.

Her sight was blurry now, she couldn’t hold her tears. She couldn’t think straight and all she could do was running. She didn’t care Luhan would chased after her or yelled at her later on.

‘Ran away from him it’s the right choice now’ she thought while ran and still ran.

After Jaemi was sure Luhan couldn’t find her, she then sat on the nearest park.

Jaemi was too sad to flashback the scene she witnessed earlier. She couldn’t believed that actually Luhan, her boyfriend was cheating with other girl behind her back.

“Yah Kim Jaemi! What are you doing here? It’s already late.” Myungsoo, Jaemi’s best friend poped out nowhere said.

“Omo~ you scared me Myungsoo!” Jaemi said while tried to erase her tears.

“Jaemi-ah, I’m so worried. Your mom said you weren’t home since this morning. What happen to you huh? Who was hurt you? Is that Luhan guy again? Had I said he is not good boy for you, Jaemi? Aish this is frustrating, jinjja.” Myungsoo, who was like brother to Jaemi gave her mini-lecture.

She didn’t know what to say and just hugged him.

“Myungsoo oppa, I’m so sad. It feels so hurt, it’s hurt like hell. I… I’m scared oppa.” She then began to tell what she witnessed about Luhan earlier.

“Shhh… oppa is here okay, you don’t have to scared anymore. Let’s go home and forget him, arraseo?” Myungsoo felt his heart would breaking again if she continued her story.

Myungsoo has had enough with Luhan. He already gave up his heart for Jaemi because he thought Luhan would take care of her well.

But what the hell, he was so wrong.

‘Luhan is a jerk indeed. I knew it from the beginning’ he angrily thought.

‘It was my fault… if I move little quick at that time, all of this wouldn’t be happen.’ Luhan thought then threw away all of things in his table.

Prang!! Luhan took the broken photo frame on the floor.

It was the photo of Luhan who was smiling warmly while embracing his girlfriend who was laughing heartily.

“Luhan-ah! Let’s take some photos! This garden is so lovely.” Jaemi merrily enjoyed the sight of beautiful garden.

“Okay, let’s take photos! They’re so lovely, just like you.” Luhan smiled while held the camera.

“Hana… deul… set… say kimchi!” Jaemi said.

The couple took some photos with cute and funny expression. They were enjoying the blissful moment together. They looked the result of their photos.

“Luhan, we should print this photo and put it in photo frame. One for you and one for me.” Jaemi said what was on her mind.

“Okay, we’ll do it later. But can we enjoy our moment now?” Luhan playfully said and then smirked.

“What… what do you want Luhan?” Jaemi stuttered.

Luhan closed the gap between them and leaned in to kiss Jaemi’s lips.

Jaemi stiffened for a second before kissed him back.

They were smiled into the kiss and enjoyed their moment indeed.

Luhan touched his lips and then smiled. He remembered how Jaemi’s lips softly kissed his lips.

He still remembered all of those blissful feelings. He remembered his first kissed with her, the way she hugged him, the way she smiled for him.

It’s like only yesterday they became the happiest couple in the world and now he suffered from the never disappear wound in his heart.

***

Since the incident, Jaemi didn’t want to meet Luhan again. Luhan had tried to gave her thousand of message, called her, but she didn’t bothered to look one of the message or pick up the call that Luhan given.

Finally, Luhan went to her house but unfortunately he saw Jaemi sat while talked with Myungsoo.

‘What is that Myungsoo guy doing with my Jaemi?’ Luhan wondered.

Luhan’s blood boiled in his veins when he witnessed Myungsoo hugged his girlfriend.

“YA KIM JAEMI!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH HIM? ARE YOU CHEATING ON MY BACK? I COULDN’T BELIEVE YOU’RE THE SAME AS OTHER CHEAP GIRL!” Luhan shouted.

“WHAT?! Why would I cheating with my oppa! Watch your words Luhan. It’s you who was cheating with that short jet-black hair girl! Who was cheap now huh?” Jaemi shouted back at him. Her heart felt hurt at his harsh words.

‘Cheap huh? So, am I cheap in your eyes, Luhan? Then all of our good memories are such a waste. Or that’s all nothing but lie?’ Jaemi bit her lower lip.

“You damn bastard! Don’t you dare say that she is cheap. You are the cheap one! Why would I gave up on her for you again?” Myungsoo unconsciously confessed then punched Luhan.

Luhan taken aback at his own words. Reality just hit him hard when Myungsoo punched him.

She couldn’t control her tears and cried endlessly. She ran away from Luhan and Myungsoo.

“Oh my God, what am I saying? Jaemi-ah I’m sorry… I… I didn’t mean that. Please hear my explanation. This is just misunderstanding.” Luhan desperately said while chased her.

Jaemi didn’t want to hear his explanation and still ran.

“She isn’t my girlfriend Jaemi-ah! I only love you!” Luhan ran faster to grab her wrist but she then faster her pace too.

She continued to run and didn’t saw a truck pass with high speed and…

BANG!!!

“JAEMIIIII!!!!!!” shouted Luhan who was late to grabbed her body which cause her body was fell into the street, nearly unconscious, with blood everywhere.

Luhan just cried when he witnessed his beautiful girlfriend weak body.

“Jaemi, can you hear me? Please be strong, don’t leave me… I’m sorry! I’m really sorry! I love you so much Jaemi-ah! Please don’t leave me.” Luhan shook her body.

“No Lu… han… I’m so… sorry…” Jaemi said with cracked in her voice.

“Noooo please don’t leave me Jaemi! Let me explain-“ Luhan sentence was cut off with her sincere voice…

“Sa… ranghae…” for the last time and she closed her eyes forever.

“Jaemi!!!!” Myungsoo just arrived and saw everyone gathered around a dead body which was laid in the street.

Luhan POV

I cried even more at the worst memory.

I was the reason of Jaemi’s death.

I deserved to die.

At the funeral, Myungsoo was really mad at me. He punched me like a madman. I really deserved it though. I didn’t try to fight back. I was hoping his punched could bring me to death.

Please don’t ask Jaemi’s parents reaction. They were very disappointed. They said I couldn’t take care of her well. They even blamed me until now.

I also deserved to be blame.

Entirely was my fault.

If only I grab her wrist faster or push her when the truck passed, that horrible incident wouldn’t happen. If I am the victim instead of her, I wouldn’t regret it.

She still didn’t know the truth yet. I’m so dumb for didn’t tell her earlier and even snapped at her like that.

If I tell her now would I free from this guilt feelings? At least I’ll try. That’s the call then.

Here I am, stood near on her cemetery. I placed a bouquet of flower for her. I bowed to her cemetery and started talking to her.

“Annyeong Jaemi-ah. Long time no see. How have you been? I hope you’re doing great.” I began talked to her.

“I haven’t doing well ever since you left me. Mianhae Jaemi-ah. I’m too late to rescue you.” My eyes felt warmer with tears.

“It’s my fault right? Snap at you in the first place. I thought I would solve our problem but witnessed Myungsoo hugged you made me jealous. I’m so silly to cursing at my lovely girlfriend. Or should I say ex-girlfriend? But we haven’t officially breaking up yet.” I said with so much guilty.

“I know I sound so pity. But I just couldn’t face the truth that you already leave me.” I sobbed softly.

“Oh right, I haven’t told you my main reason to come here. I came here to tell you the true story of that short jet-black hair girl.” I let out a chuckled. I remember her words when she shouted back at me.

“You will hear me, right?” I said with pleading voice.

Okay, so this is the truth…

Damn work! I’m so busy these days and rarely have free time. Today I couldn’t accompany my girlfriend shopping to Hongdae.

I felt bad for her though. We couldn’t spend our time together lately because of my work.

Tok tok tok…

“Come in” Luhan corrected his sat position.

“Good morning Mr. Lu, I come here to remind that you have appointment to meet your old friend this afternoon.” My secretary said.

“Oh right, prepare the gift for my friend alright? You can leave now.” I said.

I sat comfortably in the café which I’ll meet my long lost friend—Choi Minhee. She was nice girl and I had known her since forever until Minhee moved to Canada when we started junior high school period. And now she was back to Korea with her fiancé, Kris, which was my buddy.

“Luhan! Is that you? Omona~ you had grown a lot now!” Minhee said while playfully ruffled my hair.

“Yah I’m older than you ya’know, why would you do that with your oppa?” Luhan ruffled her hair back.

“Oppa my ! By the way, long time no see buddy. How have you been?” Minhee said.

“It’s good. I heard your relationship with my buddy. You must be happy now that finally there is a man who want to dating you.” I said with mischievous smile plastered on my face.

“YA that’s so mean ya’know! But yeah I’m happy woman now. How’s your love relationship?” She asked.

“It’s awesome. I already find the right woman for me so yeah~” I smiled blissfully when said that.

“Well I’m so happy for you Luhan.” She smiled at me.

Minhee and I then ordered food while chat a lot of things. We exchanged phone number to made easier way for communication. It's felt happy to meet your best friend after God-know-how-long-years-passed right?

After chatted for a long time, it was time for bid goodbye because I had another meeting to attend.

“Yeah I think this is goodbye already. Let’s meet sometimes okay? Friend hug time!!!” Minhee said with adorable manner.

“Hahaha you actually have adorable side too huh? Thanks to Kris yeah?” I said while hugged her.

Then I saw Jaemi witnessed our position right now.

Oh no, it seems she was misunderstanding us.

“Jaemi-ah!!! Yah~ Kim Jaemi, it’s not like what you see.” I quickly released our hug.

But she already ran out from the café. I tried to chase her but she was too quick.

I saw my watch and sigh. 2.50 PM.

! I late for the meeting already.

With no choice, I went back to my car and drove off to my office.

Author POV

“So that’s the truth. You just misunderstanding at that scene, babe. Am I forgiven now?” Luhan softly said while tried to erase his tears.

Like she was hearing what he just said from heaven, the wind caressed his flawless face.

At once, he felt a relief gush over his heart.

His heart which was full of heaviness disappeared together with his guilt feelings.

He felt peaceful after spit out the truth to her.

He now realized that regretting, disappointing, feeling guilty wouldn’t solve the problem.

He should move on from her.

How much he wanted to embrace their memories and wanted her to back in his arms, that's impossible to happen.

He didn’t forget Jaemi, she would always there, in his heart.

Because the ‘Kim Jaemi’s body’ would never came back.

And so did the ‘Kim Jaemi’s soul’.

*edited: 140223

A/N :

FIN!!! Yeaaaayyyy~ my first oneshot is finally done! Sorry if it's boring and mainstream. But at least I tried to pour my creativity here. For your information, I didn't like reading angst fic so yeah the result isn't the best XD /I don't like read angst genre but still I write them lmao

And I'm worst at the ending asdfghjkl forgive me I'm new author OTL

Btw, how was it? Good or bad? Tell me please. So I could improve my lack at writing. Don't be such a silent readers! Lemme know what's your thought of this story okay. I don't bite you guys hahaha

And, befriend with me please ^^

Too much blabbering >< kbye~~~

Bunch of love, byacell ♡