Wait... you weren't listening to my rants? Damn you, human! No! He's not stupid because his IQ is low. He's stupid because he suffers from short-term memory loss. Sure, he remembers I'm his pet. He even remembers the silly name he gave me but the most important thing in all the world he fails to remember is... feeding me. If everyone was like you, all stuck up in the clouds, being able to hear animals speak English, I'd have called the animal abuse hotline ages ago and reported his .

Now what? Did you just ask me my name? I already told you what it is. Do you suffer from short-term memory loss too? Do all humans have it? That's lame!

My name's Blackae. And no, you may not call me Blackie or Blacky or Blackity-Black. My name's Blackae. Got it? Now make that a long-term memory.

As I was saying... he always forgets to feed me and I always have to scratch him up a bit if I want my meow meow. One day, he finally gets a clue from all his scratched up trousers. So what does he do? He builds a nice looking contraption that supposedly does the feeding. That's great and all but then those things don't last forever. It needs to be filled when empty so we end up back at square one.

Sometimes I wish he didn't live alone and lived with another human... who didn't suffer from short-term memory loss... who would remember to feed me.

And then, whapowie! My wish comes true because I'm such a good cat. I only use inappropriate language occasionally and swipe my claws at the neighbor's koi fishes once on a full moon.

This lady that came out of thin air... she's not really human but... close enough. A malfunctioning muse is pretty human, right? See... she used to be my master's part-time muse... when she was invisible. Like... who the hell knew she was the one sparking those crazy clockwork ideas? But now, she's bent on living as a respected human... or something like that. And she says he owes her big time... or something like that. So she wants free lodging and free food for a year... or something like that. And I'm fine with it... so long as she feeds me.

Oh, did I mention she has this delicious little bird that I want to eat? But now, Whitae and I are best buds. Like what the ? Go figure.