2006

                “Ji Hyun- ah, is it good enough?” He asked, eyes silently pleading if he’s done well enough.

 

                “You missed something, Myungsoo,” She chuckles, knowing fully he wants nothing more but to stop.

 

“Eh? My hands hurt like hell. Seriously. Please, stop,” He begged, “You know that I can’t play piano right? Why are you being like this?” He pouted.

               

“I’m so sorry. And I think I already told you why.”

 

“But that doesn’t make sense!” He protested.

 

“It does, Myungsoo. You know me - I have no friends. I’m not good at making friends. You’re the only one I have. You’re my best – best friend.” She explained.

 

“You have to learn how to. Or should I find you a friend? For you to chit-chat with?” He offered.

 

“No. I don’t want to. I don’t want anyone. For me, you’re enough.” She rejected, a content smile on her face to emphasize that she can live with only him.

 

He rolled his eyes. “Aish. Enough my . You’re stubborn as always.”

 

She chuckled, “I know.”

 

“Are you coming to piano class today?” She asked.

 

“Of course. I have no choice,” He smiled.

 

“That’s right. You don’t. Even though you don’t really like to play piano, thank you.” She smiled as he pats her head.

 

“I’m sure you don’t want to be late. I meant we. Let’s hurry. Mrs. Jung is a bit scary anyway.” Myungsoo said.

 

“Good evening, guys. I have really good news. You will gain a new friend. Let’s welcome her.” As soon as Mrs. Jung finished her sentences, a girl walks in.

 

“Hi, I’m Hwang Hye Jung. Hope we can be friend” She smiled.

 

“Ms. Hwang, you can sit beside In Su, the one that’s sleepi- yah! Cha In Su! Wake up and be productive for once!” Mrs. Jung shouted at the guy named In Su. Hye Jung just laughs and walks towards the empty seat.

 

“Yah, Han Ji Hyun, wake up.” Myungsoo whispered. “Yah!” He shook her body.

 

“What?” she shot him a glare. She couldn’t be bothered with paying attention in piano lessons for the first few minutes, reviewing theories and rules. Those are things she already knows about.

 

“There’s a new student here!” He said with an excited tone and bright eyes. Myungsoo always loves to make new friends. It’s a wonder how he never forgot about Ji Hyun.

 

“Is that so? I don’t care anyway,” She replied as she closed her eyes again.

 

Again, Myungsoo shakes her body, “Yah! How could you! She’s a new friend. A new friend! She might be your first friend.”

 

“Yes, Kim Myungsoo. I know that. But if she’s my friend––my first friend, what are you then?” She rolled her eyes.

 

“Me? I’m your best friend, okay? That’s different.” He crossed his arms. “Let’s talk to her later, okay?” he asked her again.

 

“Just do it by yourself then. I don’t want to,” Once again, she rejected him.

 

“Yah, Ji Hyun!” He shouted.

 

“What is going on back there, Mr Kim?” Mrs. Jung glared at him.

 

“N-nothing. I’m sorry,” Myungsoo apologized. The teacher gave him a look before turning back to the board to write a few notes.

 

“That’s your fault, girl.” Myungsoo clicked his tongue, glaring at Ji Hyun.

 

“How is that my fault? Tch. Stupid.” She rolled her eyes then chuckled, going back to her nap.

 

An hour later, Ji Hyun was struggling to have her freedom back and she was pulled across the room.

 

“Don’t force me!” she shouted.

 

“I’m not forcing you!” Myungsoo shouted back.

 

“Yes, you are!”

 

“Whatever. Come on!” He dragged her again to the seat by the wall where a girl was reading a book.

 

           “Hello?” Myungsoo waved his hand, trying to get.

 

The girl looked up, slightly surprised. “Oh, hello!” she greeted, putting her book - ‘The Fault In Our Stars’, the title read, – away. “I’m Ji Hyun,” she gives him a hand.

 

“I’m Myungsoo. Kim Myungsoo.” He said as he shook her hand, it was so tiny compared to his. “And this is Han Ji Hyun.” He introduced as he tugged at Ji Hyun’s hand, giving her a signal to shake hands with Hye Jung.

 

                “I’m Ji Hyun.” She said reluctantly but tried not to appear rude and offend the other girl. It would be bad if her behaviour took Hye Jung aback. And Ji Hyun hates drama.

 

“Nice to meet you guys!”

 

“Likewise.” Myungsoo replied. “So, uh, how are you liking the course so far?”

 

“Well, I definitely feel like I got better at playing the piano. The lessons are really good.”

 

“And they’re nothing that Myungsoo knows or understands.” Ji Hyun .

 

“Yah! I’m not the one who keeps sleeping in class!” Myungsoo shot back, slightly blushing.

 

Ji Hyun laughed, regaining their attentions back on her. “You guys seems nice and… Close? Are you two a cou–“

 

“NO!” Ji Hyun cut off Hye Jung’s sentence. So much for not trying to be rude. “No. We’re not. We’re just childhood friends. That’s all.” That’s right. That’s all.

 

                Hye Jung nodded, “Ah, is that so? You guys are so cute! I swear.” She laughed.

 

“Uh.. Thank you.” Myungsoo blushed.

 

Ji Hyun watched him quietly, ‘He’s blushing. He’s blushing.’ She thought and sighed.

 

                “So, Hye Jung-ssi, can you play piano?” Myungsoo asked. The three of them are on the way home.

 

                “A little. But I really like piano.” she replied, “you?”

 

                “Oh, me? To be honest, I don’t really like it, but I can play a little.” he shrugged.

 

“Piano is really fun! Trust me. You’ll like it someday.” she pokes him and smiled cheerfully. Ji Hyun doesn’t know what to say or what to do.

 

“Ji Hyun-ssi. How about you? Do you like piano?” Hye Jung asked her

               

She nods. “Like it? I love it.”

 

“Ji Hyun is really good. Like a pro. I swear!” Myungsoo bragged as he embraces Ji Hyun, resulting in her heart beating faster.

 

“Really? You have to show me, Ji Hyun!” Hye Jung exclaimed.

 

Ji Hyun smiles a little, “Of course.”

 

“Oh, It’s here. Thank you!” Hye Jung said, stopping in front of a middle-sized house.  

 

“So this is your house?” Myungsoo asked, slightly surprised. “It’s not that far from my house.” Myungsoo said.

                    

“Really? That’s nice! We can play and exercise together!” Hye Jung shouted.

 

“You’re right. Okay, Hye Jung-ssi, see you next week! It’s really nice to meet you.” Myungsoo smiled.

 

“Yeah. It’s really nice to meet you guys too! See you guys around” She waved and walked into her house.

 

“She was really nice, wasn’t she?” Myungsoo smiled and poked Ji Hyun.

 

“She was.”

 

“Jesus, seriously. You have to look nice, Ji Hyun! You’re so scary” he pouted.

 

“Sorry. I’m so tired, Myungsoo. See you tomorrow at school, okay? Bye!” With that, she runs without looking at Myungsoo.

 

                “Yah, Han Ji Hyun!” Myungsoo shouted. Ji Hyun disappeared around a corner. “It’s still too far to your house, aish.” he mumbled, ruffling his hair and continuing his way home alone.

 

“Mom, I’m home.” Ji Hyun shouted as soon as she’s in.

 

“Honey, did you run all the way here? Aigoo. Think of your health baby. What if you fai–“ She cuts her off.

 

    “Mom, I’m okay. I can handle it. It’s fine. It’ll be bad if I don’t exercise. I needed the run, it wasn’t that far anyway.”

 

Her mom sighs and says, “If you say so, honey. Now, change your clothes and eat, okay?” receiving a nod from Ji Hyun.

 

“Did anything new happen today?” Her mom asked.

 

“Uh-uh. A new student came today and everyone, including Myungsoo, were like ‘Oohhh’, ‘Whooaa’, and they rolled like buffaloes.” She joked.

 

“Someone’s jealous, huh?” Her mom teased.

 

“Mom! Stop that! Aish!” Ji Hyun yelled, ears turning red.

 

“Okay, okay honey. So, umm, a boy or a girl?” her mom asked again.

 

“Duh, mom. Is Myungsoo gay?” Ji Hyun rolled her eyes, “It’s definitely a girl, mom.”

 

Her mom chuckled, “Is she pretty then?”

 

“Very. Didn’t I just tell you that they were like ‘Woo’,’Whoaaaa’, and something like that? Tch.”

 

Her mom can’t stop laughing. “Duh, honey.” she imitated her daughter. “When are you going to be honest, huh?”

 

She let out a heavy sigh, “I don’t know.”

 

“Ji Hyun! I’m going to your house after school, okay?” He said as he chewed his lunch.

 

“Since when did you ask for permission first, huh?” She rolled her eyes.

 

“Uhm…since… I don’t know?”

 

She chuckled, “Watch me play, okay? I’m going to play my favourite song. Our fav.” She said as she bites her bread.

 

    “Sure. I never get bored every time I hear you play. I love to hear that, anyway.” He smiled.

 

“That’s good then. Okay, after school!” Ji Hyun smiled and walks to her class.

 

“Yah, Kim Myungsoo. What took you so long?” Ji Hyun pouted as she crossed her arms.

 

“I’m sorry Ji Hyun. Mr. Jang wanted me to clean the classroom. It was ridiculous.” He sighed.

 

“Mr. Jang? Whoa. He’s really no joke.” Ji Hyun looked slightly surprised. He was the evil biology teacher.

 

“Let’s go now. I’m so hungry. You have food in your house, right?”

 

“Maybe. I don’t know. Mom didn’t tell me.”

 

Myungsoo put his arm around her again and they walked to her house together.

 

“Mom, we’re here.” She shouted and took off her shoes.

 

Myungsoo followed her and greeted Mrs. Han, “Hello, Mrs. Han.”

 

“Myungsoo!” She hugged him.

 

“Mom, are you cooking something?” Ji Hyun asked her mom.

 

“Of course. Oh and there’s some for Myungsoo too. Change your clothes first!”

 

“Wait here. I’m going to change my clothes first. Change your clothes too. You brought spare clothes, right?”

 

He tapped his forehead. “Aish! I forgot to bring them!”

 

“Aish. Let me take my brother’s clothes, okay?”

 

“Is it okay?”

 

“He’s not here anyway,” Ji Hyun shrugged, “Here, take it.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

“Thanks for the food, Mrs. Han. It was delicious, as always! Hehe.” He smiled.

 

“Aigoo, Myungsoo” Her mom blushed.

 

“Mom!” she pouted, “Myungsoo, let’s go” Ji Hyun dragged him to the living room. She starting to play the piano.

               

Her long, slender and beautiful fingers are playing the keyboard softly as soon as she closed her eyes. A harmonious sound flowed in the air and gave serenity and peace. She was in her own little world. Where the only ones who existed was she and the person she’s playing it for – Myungsoo.

 

He asks, “Who created this song again?”

 

“Yiruma.” She smiled.

 

“Ah right. It’s your fav song. My fav too.” He replied as he sat beside her.

 

“I, from the beginning, never could play this song.” He chuckled.

  

“That’s because you don’t like to play piano and because you didn’t try”

 

“But I think I’m starting to like it. And I’m going to try it,”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“She makes me change my mind.” He’s smiling just thinking about it ––her––

 

She raised her eyebrow, “She?”

 

“Hwang Hye Jung.”

 

Love at first sight…? I never knew you were that shallow, Myungsoo. I thought we agreed that was a stupid.

 

‘Please don’t make me believe that everything’s gonna be fine when you’ve already fallen for her and can never ever be mine’

           

 

It’s the moment where Ji Hyun feels like the world stopped spinning.

 

“Ji Hyun, Ji Hyun! Can we go to Hye Jung’s house?” he begged.

 

“What?”

 

“I said, can.we.go.to.Hye.Jung’s.house?” he emphasized every word.

 

“I’m not coming.”

 

Myungsoo pouts, “Why? Do you have something to do?”

               

Ji Hyun shook his head, meaning; ‘I have nothing to do, I just don’t want to go.’

 

“Then let’s go!”

 

“Aish, Kim Myungsoo. Fine! I’ll go.” She rolled her eyes. She really wants to punch Myungsoo’s face now. But of course, when can she ever reject Myungsoo’s requests?

               

He messed her hair, “That’s my girl! Thank you. Come on!” He said, happy.

 

Ji Hyun’s ears turns red when he said ‘my girl’

 

“Hey, wait for me!” She shouted and followed him to her house.

 

                He pressed the bell, nervous.

 

A girl came out from the house. It’s Hye Jung. “Oh, Myungsoo-ssi! And Ji Hyun!” she quickly opened the gate and greeted them happily.

 

“You guys came! What are you guys doing here?”

 

“He wanted to play.” Ji Hyun said,

 

“Yah!” he pushed Ji Hyun, embarrassed.

               

“Is that so? Come in!” They followed her and come to her house, “Mom, My friends are here!”

 

She introduced them to her mom, Mrs. Hwang.

 

“Mrs. Hwang, thank you for the cookies.” Ji Hyun thanked her.

 

“It’s okay, hun. By the way, you guys are the very first friends she brings home.” Mrs.Hwang said. Seems that she’s very happy.

               

“Really?” Myungsoo shocked.

              

Mrs. Hwang chuckles, “Hye Jung doesn’t come to school. She’s home-schooled and she doesn’t get out much.”

 

Myungsoo and Ji Hyun makes an ‘O’ shape on their mouth.

 

“Yes guys. That’s why I’m so happy when you guys greeted me that day” Hye Jung explained. Ji Hyun and Myungsoo nodded their head.

 

“Oh, Ji Hyun-ssi, can you play the piano now? I have a piano in my room.” Hye Jung said.

 

“Uhm… okay,” she agreed.

 

“Whoa, your room is really big.” Myungsoo said,

 

“Really?”

 

“Yeah”,

 

“Oh Hye Jung, so what do you want me to play?”

               

“Anything is fine.” She smiled.

               

“Okay. This is my fav song. I really love this song. A lot. Wanna hear it?”

              

“Sure.”

 

    As soon as she puts her fingers on the keyboard, she pressed the white keys and the black keys, sometimes at the same time. She drowns herself in swirling black and white, eyes half-lidded, swaying as she reached notes in different octaves. The series of pressed keys made a beautiful melody.

 

Of course it will. It’s Yiruma.

    

It took 3 minutes and 19 seconds to finish the song. Hye Jung clapped, and also Myungsoo.

               

“It’s really beautiful, Ji Hyun!” Hye Jung smiled,

 

“Thank you.” Ji Hyun replied, feeling better about coming to Hye Jung’s.

 

“You’re really a genius,” Myungsoo said to Ji Hyun. Again, she blushed.

               

“What song was that?” Hye Jung asked.

 

“It’s called ‘Fairy Tale’,”

 

“It was really good”

 

“Yeah, it was really good.” Myungsoo agreed.

 

“Hye Jung-ssi, you can play piano right? Play it for us­––me––“ Myungsoo requested.

 

“What? I can’t play piano….”

 

“Liar. Then who played the piano earlier? A ghost?” Myungsoo rolled his eyes.

 

“No. I’m serious. I can’t.”

 

“Try it!”

               

She sighed. “Fine.” She agreed reluctantly, switching places with Ji Hyun.

 

    She started to play and a beautiful song resounded throughout the room. It was nearly as amazing as Ji Hyun’s performance. But while Ji Hyun’s playing is full of strong emotions, Hye Jung’s playing was softer and gentler. She ended the song smoothly.

               

“You said you couldn’t play piano!” Myungsoo protested.                                                 

               

“But that’s nothing compared to a pro, Soo. But once I can play it as beautiful as a pro, I’ll play it for you first. I promise,” she said as she kept playing.

                

Soo?

           

“Promise?” He asked, earning a nod from Hye Jung.

 

“And… Soo? What” He chuckled.

             

“Sorry?” She laughs. “Can I call you Soo? Uh- nevermind if you don’t like it.”

 

“No- no. It’s okay. I like it.”

 

Ji Hyun let out a heavy sigh.

 

              

“What do you think about Hye Jung?” Suddenly, Ji Hyun asked him, “What?”

               

“I asked, what do you think about her?”

     

“Hye Jung?” she nods.

 

“She’s really pretty. How could someone be so pretty and cute at the same time? She’s really my type”,

 

“Really?”

 

“Yes, pure beauty and long wavy hair.”

 

“Ji Hyun! Guess what!”

             

“What?”

           

     “What day is tomorrow?”

             

“Uhm, Tuesday?”

           

“Urgh, I know! I mean is tomorrow special?”

           

“No..? I have a math quiz tomorrow. So, No.”

           

“Urgh, come on! It’s special okay!”

           

“I give up. What is it?”


           

“My birthday! How could you, Ji Hyun!” Right… How could she…

 

“I’m so sorry, Myungsoo!” She apologized.

 

“Aish. That’s okay. Can I ask you a favor?”

 

“Sure. What is it?”, “Can you tell Hye Jung that tomorrow is my birthday?”

 

“How? I don’t have her phone number and if you ask me to come to her house, that’s ridiculous, okay?”

 

“I’ll give you her phone number!”

 

“You have it?” He nods.  

 

“How?”

 

“Ah~ I asked her mom when we came to her house.”

 

“Oh….”

 

“So, can you help me?” he aegyo.

 

“Aish... Okay okay. But don’t hope for a gift from me!” She joked. Of course she already prepared the gift.

 

“Okay! I won’t expect anything from you. Just tell Hye Jung and I will think that as a gift from you. I promise.” Myungsoo sounds very serious.

 

Ji Hyun doesn’t know what to do, “…fine.”

 

Ji Hyun took her phone and is going to call Hye Jung. She pressed the number Myungsoo gave to her,

 

    “Hello? Is this Hye Jung?”

 

“Yes. Who’s this?”

 

“I’m Ji Hyun. Myungsoo gave me your number. Uhm… Hye Jung-ssi, I need to tell you something. I’m not disturbing you or anything, am I?” Please be disturbed. Please be disturbed.

 

“Oh, Ji Hyun! No, I’m not doing anything. What is it?”

 

I guess it can’t be helped. Ji Hyun inhaled, preparing whatever outcome this will be. “What do you think of Myungsoo?” Please say he’s a good friend. Just a good friend.

 

“Eh? Uh, he’s really the nicest guy I’ve ever met. Why?”

 

”Do you like him?” Please say no. Please tell me you can’t see the things I see in him.

 

“Of course! I thought it was obvious. He’s nice and really my type. Uhm… Why?”

 

“… No. Nothing. I just wanted to tell you that tomorrow is his birthday.”

 

Is it really that wrong if I want you to be happy

But only if you’re with me?

 

“Happy 18th birthday Myungsoo! You’re old now!” Ji Hyun congratulated him.

 

“Thanks, bestie! Oh, did you tell Hye Jung?” he asked.

 

“I did.”

 

“What did she say?” He asked again. Excited.

 

Ji Hyun faked smile, “secret.”

 

“Aish, this is not my girl” He pouted.

 

“Don’t aish-aish me, boy. Anyway, you’ll know at the course place today.” with that, she left him.

 

“Ji Hyun! Tell me!”,

 

“No! It won’t be a secret anymore. She wanted to give you something! It’s not fun if you already know!”

 

“Just tell me! I promise I’ll be surprise if she give me that something later”

 

“Yah! How could you do that! That’s mean.”

 

“I know, I know. But I’m curious!” he pouted,

 

“Is it something good? Is it surprising?”

 

“You’ll know! Honest, I also don’t know what is she going to give, okay. So stop asking me.” She said.

 

“You’re lying, right?” Myungsoo crossed his arms.

 

“I swear to God.” she made a serious-poker face. It is true that she doesn’t know about it... Right?

 

                “Hff. Okay, okay. I’ll stop.”

 

    Arrived at the course place, they met Mrs. Jung, “Mrs, is Hye Jung here yet?” Myungsoo asked,

 

“I think so. I saw her car like 5 minutes ago. Maybe she’s already in class,” Mrs. Jung paused. “Oh right. Happy Birthday! You have to learn more, Myungsoo!” she said.

 

“Yes, learn more,” Ji Hyun repeated Mrs. Jung.

 

Myungsoo rolled his eyes. “Fine. Let’s go, Ji Hyun” he drags her to the class.

 

“Oh Myungsoo, you’re here!” Hye Jung shouted as soon as she saw Myungsoo.

 

“Happy birthday, Soo.” Hye Jung said, “Oh, come here. I have something to give you.”

 

Again. Soo.

 

“Really? What is it?”

 

“Just follow me,”

 

“Yah, Ji Hyun. Aren’t you coming?” Myungsoo looked back, noticing his best friend isn’t following.

 

“Nah. I’m just going to be here. It’s your birthday anyway. It’s private, I think..?” Ji Hyun replied.

 

“Is that so?” Myungsoo raised his eyebrow.

 

“Yes. Just go.”

 

With that, Myungsoo followed Hye Jung.

 

 

 

 

“Surprisee!” Hye Jung shouted. It’s a guitar. The acoustic one.

 

Myungsoo surprised, “What? How did you know that I like guitars?”

 

“Ji Hyun told me last night. It’s my guitar actually,” Hye Jung laughed shyly. “D-do you like it?” she asked.

 

“I like it. A lot. Thank you so much!” He automatically hugged Hye Jung. “Ah, I’m so sorry. I didn’t meant to…”

 

“… That’s okay” Hye Jung smiled.

 

Ji Hyun stood leaning against her desk, watching them who are situated at the other side of the room.

 

She saw that. She saw everything. The hug, the red cheeks, the happy ‘soon-to-be-couple’ out there. The light is so bright. And her head feels kind of dizzy. Maybe she should drink medicine.

               

Myungsoo practically skipped to his best friend. “Ji Hyun! Thank you so much! Look, she gave me her guitar! I will keep it like forever!” Myungsoo hugged her. Ji Hyun froze. Her head feels so light.

               

“Even though you lied to me, it’s okay! Thanks anyway! You’re really my best friend!” Yes, best-friend.

 

Ji-Hyun still froze, not knowing what to do.

 

“You okay?”

               

“Uh-I’m okay” Hug me like before and I’ll be fine, Ji Hyun thought.

 

-at Myungsoo’s house-

 

“Myungsoo, where’s your mom?”

               

“Buying some stuff. Yah, listen. It’s really good.” Myungsoo said as he tried to play the guitar. He really loves the guitar.

               

“Yeah, it is. Can you play me one song, then?”

               

“Sure. Why not. Listen carefully, okay?.” She nods.

 

His fingers playing the standard E A D G B E tuning, and playing it in the key of G major.

               

“What song?”

               

“One of my favorite songs.” he smiled warmly, “It was Endlessly by The Cab”

               

“It was good.” she mumbled.

 

“This is the first time..”

 

“First time what?”

 

“This is the first time I played a song for a girl.”

               

    Somehow, she felt special.

               

Special; as a best-friend.

               

“Ah, you should’ve play it to Hye Jung. Not me.” She bitter smiled.

 

“Ah, right. But I want to play it for you. My bestie.” He patted her head.

 

                And now, she hopes that the world could stop spinning right now.

 

                A week has passed. The three of them became close. Especially the two of them. Hye Jung and Myungsoo.

 

“Ji Hyun, I need your opinion.” Myungsoo said, “What kind of opinion?”

               

“If you are in my position, what would you do?”

               

“Duh, what position?”

               

“If you like someone.”

 

Ah. He likes her.

 

“I’ll confess.” Liar.

               

“Really? Should I do that, then?”

               

“I don’t care. Do what you want”

               

“Aigoo, you became cold again, tch.”

               

“Sorry. I’m not in the mood to talk about it.”

               

“it?”

               

“Love”

               

“What?”

               

“Nothing.  Anyway, I wish you the best, Myung. Fighting!”

               

 

 

“Ji Hyun, I’m gonna call her tonight. Confess that I like her. But still, I’m scared that she’s going to reject me.”

               

“She won’t”

              

“Eh? ….and…why is that?” He raised his eyebrow.

   

Because she likes you too, stupid! “I don’t know”

              

“Aish.”

 

Ji Hyun’s phone vibrates. She got two messages. From different people.

 

Myungsoo: She accepted me!

     

Speechless.

 

Hye Jung: He confessed to me! And I said yes!

     

Another heart attack.

               

Ji Hyun replied their messages at the same time, ‘Congratulations you both!’

 

---

 

 2008

 

“It’s really cool to see you guys are still together til now.” Ji Hyun said. They’re 20 years old now and are college students. The three of them attends the same university. Nothing changed. It’s still the same. So are Ji Hyun’s feelings. She still likes him.

       

“I told you, we look cute together.” Myungsoo said. He grins.

 

Ji Hyun rolled her eyes, “Yeah, whatever, whatever.”

       

“Then, how about you?”

       

    “How about me?” she asked. Confused.

       

“Do you like someone? You never told me about someone you like. Eyy, come on. Tell me~ How come I didn’t know about someone you like, huh?”

       

‘I never told you because you are the one that I like. You didn’t know about it because you didn’t realize. I’ve been keeping my feelings for you for almost 20 years.’ She answered with her heart. No one can hear it except her and god.

       

5 words, “No, I don’t like anyone.”

       

“Fine. You don’t want to tell me, fine. Oh, I think I have to go.” He patted her forehead. “Yah, are you sick?” he asked.

  “No, I’m fine. Why?”

       

“Your temperature. Are you having a fever?”

       

She touches her fever, “N-no. I’m just tired.”

       

“Tch. What tired? It’s only 7 in the morning! What did you do yesterday?”

       

“I didn’t do anything. I swear. Ask my mom!” she glared at him.

 

“Arasseo. See you later, Ji Hyun.”

 

       

“Ji Hyun! Are you going home?” Myungsoo asked.

       

“Yes, Where else? Duh.”

       

“I wanna tell you that I can’t accompany you today.”

       

“Why–– ah practice?” he nods,

 

“Oh, I see. You’re still practicing with Hye Jung. Okay. I’ll go first, okay?”

       

“Uh, you’re so nice, Ji Hyun!” he her hair, a few strands of hair falling.

       

“Ji Hyun?”

 

“Yes?”

       

He showed her the hair that fell. Ji Hyun froze.

 

“I––I’m so sorry. Did it hurt when I your hair?” He bites her lower lips. Panic.

               

“N––no. It’s okay. I’m fine. I-I didn’t feel anything.”
               

 

“Ji Hyun, I feel that your hair is getting thinner. Are you okay?” he asked her again.

 

“I said I’m fine. I… I ran out of shampoo and the store didn’t have my usual. So I tried a new one and my hair kind of fell apart. It’s totally normal” She lied. “Um, I really need to go home. Hye Jung must also be waiting for you. Bye, Myung.”

 

“But it’s not normal if it’s too much….” He said. But she was long gone.

 

               

“Mom, is my hair getting thinner?” she shouted.

 

“It’s because of the medicine, honey. You have to do the chemotherapy,” Mrs. Han sighed. “But you always refuse. Til when, baby? Til when?”

               

“Well, I don’t want to look bad with a bald head in front of Myungsoo. A chemotherapy just makes me lose my hair faster than this!”

               

“Honey, he already has someone.…”

 

“... I know that, mom.”

 

“Then-“  

 

“I get it, mom. I do. I understand so well. You don’t have to remind me that it’s hopeless.” Ji Hyun cut off. “Is it wrong if I still trying to look good infront of him?,”

 

Ji Hyun stared at her mom. “Sometimes… Sometimes I just want him to see me as a woman. Not as a friend. Sometimes I want to look good in his eyes… And sometimes, I want to steal Hye Jung’s position. I want to be the one that Myungsoo likes. I want it all, mom,” she cried. She felt selfish.

 

Her mom hugged her and kissed her forehead. “I’m sorry honey. But still­––“

 

“I said I know!” Ji Hyun screamed. She stumbled. She reached a hand up to her face. “Mom, my nose is bleeding…”

 

A headache came over her. Her head hurts so badly.

 

“M-mom..”

 

“Ji Hyun?”

 

It hurts. Can anyone make the pain go away?

    

    She looked at the blood on her hand. The red made her feel worse. She felt so nauseous and- and-

 

“Ji Hyun?”

 

Myungsoo. Make the pain go away.

 

“Ji Hyun!!”

 

    Her world turned dark.

 

---

 

2011

 

It’s been 4 years. Still, nothing’s changed.

Myungsoo and Hye Jung are still together.

Myungsoo is still unaware of Ji Hyun’s feelings.

He doesn’t know that Ji Hyun is sick.

Ji Hyun’s feelings never faltered.

Myungsoo will always be her first and her last love.

               

“Hey Ji Hyun. I’m going to propose Hye Jung next month. What should I do?” and Ji Hyun will always be his bestfriend that will always going to hear everything.

               

“What? Really?” It’s really hopeless.

               

“Just propose her then.”

               

“Yeah, but how? I want her to cry when I said that I’m going to propose her.”

               

“Play the guitar for her….”

 

‘Wait. No. I don’t want him to play it for her.’

            

“Should I?” he asked her again.

               

“No! Don’t do that. Do… Something else. Just… don’t play a guitar for her.” Finally, she said it.

               

“Why?”

     

Aww, come on. Say it. “Don’t play a guitar for anyone else. J-just play it for me. Please.”

               

“Huh? Ji Hyun? Why? You’re not making any sense.”

 

Oh right. Why?

                

‘Because I wanna be the one… The only one…’ she sighed.

 

“Never mind what I said. Play it for her! I’m sure she’ll probably like it,” Ji Hyun chuckled. “I was just worried you’d play our song.” She lied.

 

“Aish, this girl. Getting worried over nothing. Of course I won’t. You’re my bestie. Just because I’m going to propose, it doesn’t mean I’ll replace you.”

 

Ji Hyun couldn’t comprehend more than the first few words he said though. Because she does feel replaced.

 

This girl. No more my girl.

 

“So, Myungsoo. You’re going to propose her tonight, right?” Ji Hyun asked, phone pressed against her ear as she stared at the ceiling in wonder.

 

“Yes, yes, yes! What should I do??”

 

“Calm down, Myungsoo!”

 

“Fine. B-but… I’m scared.”

 

“I know, Myungsoo.”

 

“Maybe I shouldn’t.”

 

“We are not backing down on this, Myungsoo!”

 

“What if––“ she cuts him off.

 

“No more buts and negative what ifs, okay? Don’t think about what if she says ‘no’. Think about what if she would’ve said ‘yes’ but you never asked because you’re too scared.” Ji Hyun replied. “Just do it with confidence. She’s going to accept you. She loves you,” As much as I do.

 

“I, too, if you propose to me, will say yes.” Ji Hyun mumbled, trying to sound as casual as possible.

 

                “Mm? What did you say? I couldn’t hear you. Bad signal. Sorry. Please repeat.”

 

                “No. Just do it, okay? I have to go. I don’t want to be late for my brother’s tournament. Bye, Myungsoo.”

 

               

 

                20 minutes later, Ji Hyun opened her SNS and saw a photo that Hye Jung posted.

 

The caption says:

                ‘Soo proposed to me! I’m so touched. Thank you for the song, Soo. I love you. Forever.’

 

A minute later, Hye Jung posted a video of Myungsoo playing a guitar.

 

’ my life.’ She threw her phone and covered herself with a blanket.

 

                                                                                                                                        

 

“Ji Hyun! Mr. Yang called you to come to his office,” a ‘friend’ shouted.

 

“Okay, I’ll be there. See you around, Hye Jung”

 

Ji Hyun and Hye Jung. They were talking about last night.

               

Last night when Myungsoo proposed Hye Jung. Last night when Hye Jung accepted him. Last night when Ji Hyun felt so hurt.

 

But of course Ji Hyun didn’t tell Hye Jung about the last thing that happened last night. She’s not that stupid. She’s not.

 

“Mr. Yang? Do you need something?” she came to his office.

 

“Oh. I just want you to do me a favor.” He said.

 

“Pardon? What kind of favor, Mr.Yang?” she asked.

 

“Look, you’re one my favorite student. You’re genius. Everyone wanted you to come.”

               

“Come? Come to where?”

               

“Our Festival next year.”

 

“What?”

               

“Classical Music. That’s our concept for next year. It will be held on June, 15th 2012. Can you come? Only one or two songs. I promise.” He begged.

               

June, 15th. Ji Hyun’s birthday.

 

               

“B-but Mr. Yang… I still don’t know about it.”

               

“Nah, It’s okay. Think as much as you want. Just give me the answer yes or no, Ji Hyun. It’s your choice, anyway.”

               

“Okay, Mr. Yang. I will think about it and give you the answer right away” She bowed and left the office.

 

She left the office with a sigh. “I don’t think I can do it..” she mumbled.

               

She bumped into someone.

 

“Ji Hyun.”

 

“M-myungsoo! You surprised me. What?”

 

“I heard that you’re being called by Mr. Yang. What happened?” he asked.

 

Is he that worried?

               

“It’s nothing. Mr. Yang just wanted me to attend the Festival next year. Tch, It’s next year, for God’s sake!”

 

“Really?? That’s great! When?”

               

“I don’t know. He said that It will be held on June, 15th.…”

               

“…T-that’s your birthday, right? On your birthday!”

               

She rolled her eyes, “I know. Nothing special. And I don’t think I could come.” She said without hesitation.

               

“What? Why?”

               

She gulped, “I- I just won’t come. I won’t be there.”,

 

‘Why?”

 

There’s a long pause.

 

“I don’t know.” She finally answered.

 

Myungsoo raised an eyebrow. “You don’t know?”

 

“It’s just a feeling.” She shrugged and left, turning to the left.

 

    “Yah! Ji Hyun!” Myungsoo called out. He was about to chase after her but was stopped by the vibration in his pocket. He pulled out his phone, checking the name. “Hye Jung?”

 

    Ji Hyun stayed at the corner, silently watching Myungsoo.

 

    “No. I don’t have anything to do.” He talked to the phone.

 

    

 

    

 

January, 25th 2012

 

“Ji Hyun!! We’re going to get married in two months!” Myungsoo shouted.

               

“What do you mean by ‘we’?” she raised her eyebrow.

 

“Duh, Of course it’s me and Hye Jung!”

 

How she wished he would say ‘me and you’ not other girl’s name.

               

“Really???? Wow, Myungsoo. That’s great. When?” she asked him again.

 

Just want to make sure that it’s not a dream.

               

“Well, me and Hye Jung agreed to married on my birthday..”

               

“… On your birthday….”

 

“Yeah, why?”

               

“Nothing,”

               

“Why is it always nothing…?” he sighed.

               

She bitter smile, “Because It’s really nothing.”

 

He pats her head, “Aish, this girl. Fine.”

    

She smiled and sipped the coffee she held in her hand. “So Myungsoo…” she called his name.

 

“Yes?”

 

Now or never. “I need to tell you something.”

 

“What?” he said and accidentally looked at the wall clock behind Ji Hyun’s head.

 

“I-“ Before she could continue her sentence, he tapped his forehead.

 

“Oh right! I have to go meet up with someone!”

 

“A-h.. H-Hye Jung?”

               

He blushed and nodded. “I’m sorry, Ji Hyun. Just tell me later!”

 

Ji Hyun sighs, “As expected. Okay, see you then!” With that, he left.

 

The important person in your life is no longer me

I wanted to tell you about my illness

But you left for me for someone else

Someone who is more important than me

 

February, 28th 2012

 

13 more days until their wedding party. Ji Hyun’s health became worst than before. She takes more pills than ever before. Her hair became thinner.

               

But her feelings still never wavered.

 

“Oh, Myungsoo. You must be very happy.” She said.

 

“Very.” He answered,

 

“Hey, Myungsoo…” she called out. “What…what do you think about me?” Ji Hyun asked carefully.

 

“What?”

 

“Just answer, please.”

 

“Well, I think you’re a really good bestfriend. You’re nice, pretty, smart, a genius pianist, and… cute. Why were you asking?”

               

“No. It’s nothing. I just wanted to ask. It’s been 20 years since we’re best friends. That’s all.” She smiled.

 

“And I will always be your bestfriend.” He patted her shoulder and gave her his warmest smile that’s reserved only for three people in his life – his mom, Hye Jung and her.

 

Always become your bestfriend. She wanted more. More than just best friends. She wanted to become his lover. The one he loved. Not as his best friend. Now she doesn’t know what to do. Should she feel happy because they’re bestfriends or should she feel sad because that’s all they’ll ever be?

 

“Ji Hyun, we came really far together, huh?”

 

She smiled at him. “Yeah. Myung. We did.”

 

And I don’t know if I can be here for much longer.

 

               

 

March, 4th 2012

               

Day-9 until their wedding. And day-9 until Myungsoo’s birthday. Ji Hyun is still unable to tell him her feelings and also she is still unable to give him a present for his birthday. She always kept his birthday present. She kept it for 6 years because she was unable to give it. What a coward.

             

“Honey, we have to go to the hospital. Your fever is really high.” Her mom shouted.

 

“I’m so dizzy, mom.” Ji Hyun answered. “I can barely walk. I’m so dizzy,”

   

“Get in the car. We’re going now.” Her mom, Mrs. Han said, panicked.

 

-Arrive at Seoul Hospital-

               

“Mrs, did you already register before?” A nurse asked, “I did. I already called. On behalf of Han. Mrs. Han.”

               

“Oh, right. Mrs. Han. Follow me, Dr. Choi is already waiting for you and your daughter.”

 

“Oh, Mrs. Han and Ji Hyun! Are you alright, Ji Hyun?”

               

“No, “ Mrs. Han answered. “She’s got a fever. It’s really high. What should I do?”

               

“Calm down. Let me check on her.” Dr. Kim checked Ji Hyun’s condition.

 

“It’s not a fever. Her cancer is getting worse. Her condition is dropping. She needs to be hospitalized.” The doctor explained. “We’ll need to perform surgery on her immediately after getting a hold of the risks if you decide to go through the procedure.”

 

“I understand.” Mrs. Han nodded. “Then I’ll put my daughter’s care in your hands, doctor. Please do your best.”

               

Ji Hyun stared wide-eyed at her mom. “What? Mom. I don’t want to. I can’t.”

 

The doctor stared at her, unsurprised by her unwillingness. “It seems your daughter has other opinions. I’ll leave you to discuss this matter then. If you’d excuse me, I’ll take my leave,”

 

They stared at him as he left the room. Ji Hyun switched her gaze to her mom.

 

“The wedding.” She said. “The ing wedding.”

 

“Hyunnie, you have to understa-“

 

“You know that I have to ing attend the wedding on Tuesday! Mom, I’m never gonna make it!”

               

“But, Honey. It can’t be helped. You have to. It’s for your own sake.”

               

“I don’t care about my sake! I don’t care!” She yelled. “I’m not going to miss Myungsoo’s wedding!”

 

“Sshh,” her mom told her to be quiet. “Okay, honey. I’ll do anything if you want to do the surgery also chemotherapy.”

               

“Why do I have to do the surgery? I’m going to die anyway. I don’t need those!” she screamed. “Even if I live, isn’t my life already breaking down?! I’m in love with my best friend who’s going to get married to my only friend in the week where I’m on the verge of dying-“

 

“Honey, don’t say that, please. I’ll do anything. I promise.” Her mom begged.

 

“Mom, even if I live, they’ll find out. Even if I live, I’ll still have my unreciprocated feelings. Even if I live, I’d rather die!”

               

“JI HYUN!” her mother shouted.

 

Ji Hyun fell silent. That was the first time she ever raised her voice. But she went quiet not because of the shouting, or the possibility of bothering other patients, but because tears started pooling in her mother’s eyes.

 

“Please do this,”

 

Ji Hyun sighed, guilt piling up in her chest. “Fine.”

 

Mrs. Han sighed in relief.

 

“But, Mom, I want you to keep this as a secret. Don’t tell Myungsoo, don’t tell anyone. I might not come to his wedding party. Just, don’t tell him anything. Promise me that.”

               

Her mom paused for a seconds, “I promise.”

 

               

 

March, 13rd 2012 – The wedding day.

 

“Tch, Where is she? She promised to come, but where is she now?” Myungsoo mumbled, worried.

 

“Soo, what are you doing here?” Hye Jung asked him, “Ah, I’m waiting for someone. Ji Hyun.”

 

“Ji Hyun? Ah, is she coming?”

 

“I don’t know. That’s why! She said that she’s going to come. Her mom didn’t tell me anything about it too. And her mom couldn’t come today because she said that she has something important to do.” He sighed. ‘Should I be upset or worried with you, Ji Hyun?’ he thought.

 

Something that Myungsoo doesn’t know.

 

“You may kiss the bride now.” the priest said to Myungsoo and Hye Jung.

 

Slowly, Myungsoo approached Hye Jung. He took her hands and kiss her forehead then her lips. Everyone clapping together seeing the newlywed, the MyungJung couple is happy. Everyone is happy as well.

 

Except Ji Hyun.

 

The wedding is finally over. Myungsoo and Hye Jung are going to their new house and live as a husband and wife.

 

“Myungsoo, are you okay?” Hye Jung asked him,

 

“N-no. It’s okay. I’m just a little bit upset because my bestfriend –best-bestfriend– wasn’t coming today. I wanted her to see us anyway. But she didn’t come,” Then he sighed.

 

“Ji Hyun wouldn’t just disappear for something unimportant.”

 

“But at least, she could told me earlier. That’s mean. And also, it’s my birthday!”

 

“Oh, Soo. It’s okay. Don’t be mad. I’m pretty sure that she’s going to contact you soon. Saying that she’s sorry.” Hye Jung smiled.

 

Myungsoo replied, “I hope so. But still. At least she could text me a ‘congratulations’ or ‘happy birthday’ to me.” He blew his bangs.

 

“Don’t be spoiled, Soo. If I were you, I would be more worried about her. After all, with her stubborn loyalty, she could’ve been dying and still struggled to make it to the wedding.”

 

May, 18th 2012

               

No contact with Ji Hyun makes Myungsoo feels uneasy. He’s alone right now in his house because Hye Jung has to meet her parents.

 

Myungsoo is in the middle of taking a nap. Someone knocked on the door. Myungsoo rubbing his eyes and opens the door. It’s Ji Hyun’s mother.

               

“Oh, Mrs. Han! Long time no see. Come one in,”

 

“N-no. I’m just going to stand here. It won’t take a lot of time. I’m here because I need to tell you something. I really need to tell you this.”

               

“Uhm.. Okay. What do you want to tell, Mrs. Han? And where’s Ji Hyun?” he asked.

               

“Ji Hyun died.”

             

“Sorry. What?“
               

 

“She passed away.” Mrs. Han lowered her head.

               

“What?”
               

 

“Myungsoo….” She’s trying to approach him,

 

He backed away, “I-I’m sorry Mrs. Han. But I don’t think I understand what’s going on.”

 

Mrs. Han let out a heavy sighed, “Ji Hyun. She.. passed away.”

 

Myungsoo’s jaw dropped.

 

“She’s had leukemia for a long time ago. The doctors said her heart was broken and it stopped working. She couldn’t come to your wedding because she died that day. And I also feel sorry because I couldn’t come because I have to take care of her funeral. I’m really sorry,”

 

“Oh and Myungsoo. I have something to give you. It’s for you from Ji Hyun. Wait here.”

 

5 minutes passed.

 

    Mrs. Han brought something big in and Myungsoo took it out of her hands, seeing as she struggled with it slightly.

 

“What is this, Mrs. Han?” He asked.

 

“She bought this present a long time ago. When you were 18. She wanted to keep it and give it by herself. But she couldn’t. She felt sorry at that time. If you asked me why she didn’t give it to you years ago, she told me that you already have one. And then she told me again she would give it to you when you’re happy, right on your wedding, Myungsoo. I have to go, son. Once again, congratulations. From me and from Ji Hyun.” After that, she left.

 

Myungsoo went inside, making way to his room. He opened the present. It was a guitar. He strummed it a little. Then he found a letter.

           

He read it, it says:

 

                                                                              

 

            He cried, “Stupid Han Ji Hyun. I won’t laugh at you.” He mumbled then he play the guitar.

 

He touched the guitar once again. There’s nothing on the guitar.

           

“Aish, this girl. There’s nothing on it!” When he was about to give up and leave it for another day, he was too emotional to be playing tricks and games, he felt a small dip on the guitar. He turned it over. A carving.

 

He stared at it, trying to rub it in.

    Realization sunk in what the writing said.

 

It confused him, surprised him, but it pieced everything together and it made him cry harder.

 

“Ji Hyun, you stupid, stupid, girl.”

 

‘I like you. From your friend, Ji Hyun.’