The entirety of Super Junior came to visit, staggered over the visiting hours each of the four days (during which he learnt exactly why Zhou Mi had packed so many pairs of boxer shorts and briefs—Sungmin had even joked that he would buy him liners or Tampax if he wanted…he was starting to think it might be a good idea) he was kept in hospital for. Even Kibum took a break from his acting to come and say hello to the baby.

“Have you named her yet?” Henry asked, when he came in for the third time with Donghae and Sungmin, after they’d both taken photos of Zhou Mi and the three of them holding her.

“No,” Kyuhyun replied. “I wouldn’t know where to begin.”

“I like Baoyu,” Zhou Mi put in.

Kyuhyun blinked at him. “Something Korean,” he replied calmly. Zhou Mi pouted, the happy light going out of his eyes. Kyuhyun sighed. “That converts well into Chinese.”

Zhou Mi beamed. “Okay!”

Han Geng and Siwon came in, half an hour later, each with a baby naming book in hand; one purely in Mandarin and one in Korean. They gave them both to Zhou Mi and then Han Geng picked up the baby from the bed beside Kyuhyun and cuddled her, and Siwon cooed lightly at her, wiggling his fingers in front of her face. The baby was good, looking up at them with wide eyes and not crying that she’d been taken away from her mother. She didn’t cry very often, in fact, except when she was hungry, but Kyuhyun had got into the habit of feeding her regularly, so it wasn’t really a problem. Zhou Mi, who had experience with small children, would burp and change her so far. Kyuhyun knew he had to learn how to, soon, but he wanted to put it at bay for as long as possible.

When they were left alone, until Zhou Mi had to leave late every night, they pored over the name books together, because although they had quite some time to register her, even Kyuhyun was getting tired of calling her “Baby”. He also didn’t want her to end up with a birthday like Junsu or Siwon’s; much later than it actually was.

Because she was mostly Kyuhyun’s, Zhou Mi only made light suggestions for names, not even really asking Kyuhyun to give her a Chinese name, but allowed Kyuhyun to make the final decision. He listened around to see what other babies were called and reported the name choices to Kyuhyun, who made sure he didn’t choose anything too popular. Kibum was proof enough of why that was a bad idea.

It was late, after Zhou Mi had gone home and after the midwife had taken the baby to clean her, that Kyuhyun found a name he actually liked in the baby name book, on his fifth consecutive read. Hyemi. It was pretty, and although it had no overt meaning for them, it was still nice.

“Hyemi, Cho Hyemi,” he mumbled to himself, deciding it sounded nice. He picked up the Mandarin names book, but he didn’t really understand much of it. He checked that nobody was looking before picking up his mobile and typing, “i like Hyemi for a name.”

He got a response moments later. “Oh, that’s so pretty!” He could almost hear Zhou Mi coo in delight.

“what about for a Chinese name?” he typed, because he really didn’t know what they could call her.

“How about we think both about that tonight and then we can give her one? Register her as Hyemi, it’s very pretty!” Zhou Mi told him.

The midwife came back in and noticed he was using his mobile, so she confiscated it from him, turning it off and scolding him for using one in the hospital, but he was smiling, because his baby—Hyemi—now had a name. He asked if he could register her in the hospital and when he was given the form, after being told he could, he filled it in quickly (“Name: Cho Hyemi (조혜미), : Female, Birthday: 12 December 2010, Birthplace: Seoul, Mother: Cho Kyuhyun (조규현), Birthday: 3 February 1988, Birthplace: Seoul, Address: [Insert Residence Here], Occupation: [Left Blank], Father: [Left Blank]”). He was lucky that he didn’t have to enter the father’s details because they weren’t married, although not having Zhou Mi as her legal father was strange. Also attached was an application for her to receive a Social Security Number and a South Korean Residence Number. He handed the registration form back to the midwife and he smiled warmly because he’d done it. His baby had a name. Officially.

(Later that afternoon they did the simplest thing they could think of and translated Hyemi into Chinese. When Kyuhyun protested that Huimi was not the most attractive-sounding of names, Zhou Mi suggested Haimi (周海觅), from the slightly different Romanised spelling of Haemi. Kyuhyun thought that was much better.)

---

On the fifth day, Kyuhyun and Hyemi were allowed home, and the minivan came to pick them up. Kyuhyun was wrapped in the same dark robe he’d arrived in and hurried into the van, Zhou Mi carrying the baby wrapped tightly in a swaddling cloth to keep her warm. They drove back in silence, Kyuhyun resting his head against the window.

Being at home was strange now he had Hyemi. Despite her quietness in the hospital, she was quite a loud baby when she wanted to be; by the middle of the first week, when Christmas loomed and they were all fairly high-strung, she’d woken all of them at least twice. Kyuhyun got such bad sleep that he started snapping at people and crying at the drop of a hat. He took to hiding himself away in his room and trying not to talk whilst Zhou Mi held Hyemi and rocked her to sleep in the living room with the rest of the members.

Zhou Mi started up his research again that week, and gave Kyuhyun the advice of, “feed her when you’re stressed. It’ll calm you down.” Zhou Mi hadn’t lied to him so far, so Kyuhyun trusted that it would help. He began to take Hyemi from Zhou Mi when he sensed he was getting upset and would crawl into bed, shirt up round his neck and blankets across his lap, Hyemi clutched in his arms. It did help calm him down, and his mood became a lot better—it was comforting to hold her like that. Zhou Mi often followed because he liked to watch him feed her, which Kyuhyun thought was incredibly creepy although he should have been used to the older boy’s weird tendencies by then. It didn’t take him long to become used to Zhou Mi being there, and so he started being less awkward about feeding her, even doing it with the older boy lying next to him in bed. feeding usually made Hyemi sleepy, and sometimes it even made him tired. Zhou Mi would take Hyemi, burp her, and put her to sleep when Kyuhyun was shutting his eyes.

Speaking of Zhou Mi, he had moved into Kyuhyun’s room swiftly and without Kyuhyun even really noticing. First it was his toiletries, then his clothes, and then suddenly the side of the room that had been Sungmin’s became covered in Zhou Mi’s belongings and baby clothes.

Kyuhyun thought a lot about what Sungmin had said about them sharing beds, and so he made an effort to ask Zhou Mi where he was going to sleep, seeing as Sungmin had taken his own bed into his new room. Considering they’d been sharing a bed for three days by that point, Zhou Mi blinked as if he couldn’t understand what he was being asked.

“With you,” he answered, as if it was obvious (which, to be honest, it was).

“Oh,” Kyuhyun replied quietly, although he hadn’t really been expecting a different answer. They always slept together.

Zhou Mi blinked again. “Is that a problem? You’ve never minded before.”

“I…no, no it isn’t,” Kyuhyun said, and smiled softly up at him. “It’s fine. I just wanted to be sure.”

Zhou Mi rolled his eyes. “Well, if that’s okay…”

Kyuhyun nodded hurriedly and scurried over to their bed, grabbing pyjamas and looking awkwardly over at the older boy as if unsure if he should change there or not. Considering Zhou Mi had showered with him and bathed him frequently when he was pregnant, he didn’t suppose there would be any problem. They were both boys, after all. They’d changed off stage together before. He tugged off his clothes and pulled on his pyjamas decisively. Then he climbed into bed and waited for the older boy to get dressed and climb in with him, wondering why exactly he was so nervous, because he never had been before—not like that.

Zhou Mi climbed in and rested an arm comfortably over Kyuhyun’s hip, almost a little possessively. Kyuhyun tried to ignore his brain, thinking that the husband/wife conversations must have been affecting him—they weren’t gay. Zhou Mi wasn’t gay. Kyuhyun saw the way Zhou Mi looked at some girls. Therefore he couldn’t be. This was just friendship. Extremely close friendship.

He shoved the thought out of his head and curled up, pressed flush against Zhou Mi, his head inches from the older’s, and tried to get a few hours of sleep before their daughter woke up.

---

Just at the end of the first week was Christmas. The flats were both decorated with tinsel streamers and they had small Christmas trees covered in plastic baubles in each flat. Someone had also had the bright idea to tie up mistletoe. Kyuhyun avoided it by being very slow and not walking under it with anyone except Hyemi, who got plenty of kisses from her extended family over Christmas.

Kyuhyun had been too busy having Hyemi to shop for them all, so he wished them Merry Christmas and said for them all to keep a mental IOU. They all told him it didn’t matter though, because his daughter was present enough. A few had given him gifts that were baby related; Sungmin had knitted him a large red and blue blanket to wrap around them both, and Henry, Ryeowook and Donghae had bought baby toys (Donghae’s were all alien or fish related, or green), and Leeteuk had bought dummies, rattles, and a fluffy new black jumper for Kyuhyun for wearing when he was baby-less. Kangin had tried to one-up Leeteuk by buying Kyuhyun a game for his DS, which made him smile, and Heechul had bought him a new coat that was able to be bigger or smaller due to the zips on the side. Eunhyuk and Yesung had bought him a joke calculator that tricked people by giving mathematical equations and rude sayings in response to genuine mathematical queries (Kyuhyun laughed loudly). Siwon, Han Geng, Shindong and Kibum had bought him books he’d wanted because he was running out of things to do. He hugged his Hyungdeul, happy that they’d all thought carefully.

Zhou Mi had kept very quiet through the present giving, so Kyuhyun turned to him with a smile when the rest of his Hyungdeul had finished. The older handed over two parcels. “I would have bought you acne cream, but apparently pregnancy treated your skin very well,” he said cheerfully.

Kyuhyun opened the enormous, heavier parcel first. Inside were two large box-sets of Chinese dramas. One was called “Three Kingdoms” and appeared to be the beginning twenty-five episodes of a period drama, and the other was called “Romance in the Rain”, which he presumed was mostly romantic, although the summary suggested it was a period drama as well. He wrinkled his nose at the romantic one.

“I thought you could practise your Chinese whilst at home!” Zhou Mi told him. “They’re both supposed to be good, so I thought I’d watch one or two with you, too!”

Kyuhyun nodded without paying much attention and opened the other parcel, which contained two t-shirts, one of the periodic table, and one proclaiming, in English, “es don’t know about my additional pylons.” He cracked up at that one and hugged his hyung, giggling to himself even though the rest of the boys hadn’t a clue why he’d gone crazy.

They had a lazy day watching television and eating meat sandwiches and passing Hyemi from person to person, and Kyuhyun went to bed feeling happy and relaxed, and definitely having needed that day.

---

It wasn’t long after New Year, which was spent quietly with just the members, before Leeteuk decided he wanted them all to have an immediate active role in Hyemi’s upbringing.

“Haimi-yah,” he murmured to the baby, everyone having decided that her Chinese name was cuter than her Korean one (with the exception of Kyuhyun, who only ever called her Hyemi). “How about you come to Uncle Teukie?” He lifted her out of Zhou Mi’s arms, jiggling her gently.

“Halmeoni,” slipped out of Kyuhyun’s mouth before he could help it. Leeteuk blinked at him for a moment before grinning.

“Grandma Teukie~!” Leeteuk exclaimed happily to the baby, and Kyuhyun didn’t really know why Leeteuk had consented to being given the female title so quickly. It became apparent when Leeteuk turned to Kangin and showed him to the baby. “And here’s Grandpa!”

Kangin frowned. “Teukie-hyung…Teukie-hyung, you’re making me sound old.” He pouted. He ended up with an armful of baby for his efforts and then found himself learning how to hold her correctly as Leeteuk ordered Zhou Mi to put Kyuhyun to bed for a little longer.

By the time Zhou Mi came back, Leeteuk had made sure that most of Super Junior knew how to hold a baby, how to burp her, and the correct way to bottle feed.

“I didn’t know you had so much experience with babies, Hyung,” Zhou Mi told him softly.

“I’ve been researching, like you. This is my granddaughter, after all,” Leeteuk said with a laugh. “I wanted to make sure we’d all look after her well.”

He watched as Eunhyuk the baby into Donghae’s arms and then ran off to cry or wash his hands or something like that and smiled at how much Henry and Donghae cuddled her.

“I’m glad Kyuhyun decided to keep her,” Zhou Mi said quietly, obviously seeing what he was seeing.

“Me too,” Leeteuk agreed, as he kept watching his band members. “It was a good idea. Kyuhyun needs this. It’ll teach him to be more responsible. But we all needed it, too.”

Zhou Mi nodded, because he knew exactly what Leeteuk meant.

---

Kyuhyun was usually very good at feeding Hyemi in private. He didn’t want to scare anyone by doing it where they could see—plus, he didn’t want anyone to see his s (although Zhou Mi already had).

However, one day he was feeding her when there came a knock on the door. Before he could tell them to wait, Donghae entered with Henry in tow. Kyuhyun squeaked and grabbed for his blanket to cover himself, but the damage was done.

Nobody had ever talked about how the baby was fed, considering Kyuhyun wasn’t allowed in the kitchen after the last time he’d tried to cook and nearly blew the rice cooker up. They all had their ideas, but none of them wanted to focus on the science or logic of it; he had to be feeding her somehow and he had s. But they didn’t want to think about it. (Although Sungmin had mentioned something about -pumps to Zhou Mi earlier that week…)

Henry hid himself behind Donghae immediately, trying to rub the sight out of his eyes, and Donghae blinked at Kyuhyun in a cross between horror and intrigue.

“You feed her?” Donghae asked, and Kyuhyun nodded a little shakily.

“Y-yeah,” he stammered. “I do.”

Donghae nodded. “That explains a lot, like why you never feed her around us.”

Kyuhyun nodded as well, because it was true.

Henry backed slowly towards the door. “That’s weird, okay. It’s weird. I can’t be here when you’re…I can’t see it but I know it’s still happening and it’s weird.” He turned and hurried out quickly.

Kyuhyun looked down at his baby, eyes b with tears. He knew it was weird; that was why he did it in private. He didn’t need to be told so.

But at the same time, he was her mother and she needed to be fed. If he was a girl, would Henry have been so horrified by it? There were laws allowing mothers to feed wherever they needed to in some countries. Why did it have to be weird that he was feeding his daughter? He’d carried her to term, he’d given birth to her. In that context, it was perfectly normal for him to feed her.

Donghae said quietly, “He’ll come around. It’s okay, Kyuhyun.”

Kyuhyun nodded once and then he heard the door shut. He looked up to see that Donghae had gone as well, without telling him what they’d wanted. He to his side, baby lying against his stomach, and cried silently into his pillow.

That was how Zhou Mi found him five minutes later, shirt still pushed out of the way and tears running down his cheeks. The older boy took Hyemi and sat with her for about ten minutes, making sure the milk would stay down, sitting next to Kyuhyun to give him company, before putting her in her cot. Then he climbed into bed and pulled Kyuhyun against him, kissing his hair. He didn’t say anything even when Kyuhyun rolled to face him and cried into his shirt. Kyuhyun knew that Zhou Mi wouldn’t make him talk until he had to, and this made him feel better. He went to sleep with his face in the crook of Zhou Mi’s neck, legs tangled together, and the older boy’s arms tightly around his waist. He wondered if it was right for him to feel so good about that, like it was normal. (Although, as Sungmin had said, what was normal for other boys wasn’t always normal for them…and he quite liked that.)

---

God sighed, watching Kyuhyun interact with his daughter and the other band members. He was glad that Kyuhyun had decided to keep the baby, but He wanted to do something else. It was sad that some of his band members were less understanding than others and there was little God could do to help with that, but he could give Kyuhyun a gift, to make this all seem much more worthwhile.

He was feeling generous so he decided to give Kyuhyun two eternal eggs, of Kyuhyun’s own genes, in his eternal womb; he could never lose them. They could never die, unlike women’s eggs. If they were fertilised they would give him more children.

He smiled, because as of that moment, Kyuhyun was one of the luckiest men in the world, and it was all because of Him.

---

During the next week, after they talked about the others walking in on Kyuhyun, and when they stopped finding it cute how Hyemi mouthed in hunger at Zhou Mi’s s through his shirt when Kyuhyun wasn’t around, Zhou Mi bought Kyuhyun a manual, foot-powered pump to make things easier. He mentioned that they could keep the milk in the fridge and when the others were looking after Hyemi, they could feed her. Kyuhyun could leave the house if he wanted and know she’d still be fed.

When he saw it for the first time, he was wary of it. It was a machine with two suction horns which each covered a , and coaxed the milk into two small bottles attached to the horns. When he or Zhou Mi would press the foot pedal, it would start the process. Kyuhyun put off trying it for a full day because he really didn’t like the look of it.

“Kuixian, there’s nothing to worry about. It’s perfectly safe,” Zhou Mi told Kyuhyun, who wasn’t entirely sure he believed him.

“I know how to do it myself,” he mumbled. “I don’t see why—”

“But what if, just what if, you’re not around when she needs feeding?”

“I will be.”

“Humour me!” Zhou Mi told him, pouting.

Kyuhyun sighed and nodded, lifting his shirt up. He allowed the older boy to press the cups against his s and waited to see if it would work, Zhou Mi pressing the foot pedal. It did, and both bottles were soon full of milk (it didn’t really feel as weird as Kyuhyun had thought it would). Zhou Mi took one and fed it to Hyemi, commenting on how it was nice to be able to feed her instead of just watching Kyuhyun do it and then doing all the dirty jobs as Kyuhyun slept. He burped her as he fed her, and then handed her back to Kyuhyun for him to play with before she got tired.

“Thank you,” Kyuhyun mumbled as he cuddled Hyemi to his chest and the older boy smiled fondly at him.

Kyuhyun pretended the fluttering in his stomach was because of the pump and not because he was happy. (It wasn’t good for his image.)

---

Nothing much happened until Kyuhyun turned twenty-four in early February. Kyuhyun didn’t even really notice it was his birthday until he realised his mother had sent him a large box of food he loved, and Zhou Mi walked into their bedroom with a large box.

“What’s this?” Kyuhyun asked.

“I’ve been talking to Sungmin-hyung,” Zhou Mi replied. This was nothing new, as the two of them were good friends. “He said it must be uncomfortable in our bed.”

Kyuhyun shrugged, because he was quite used to curling up to the other in their very small one-person bed.

“Well, personally I agreed with him,” Zhou Mi replied. “It is quite uncomfortable and you know we haven’t had any…awkward…moments yet, but that doesn’t mean we won’t.”

“Mi, I’m not twelve, I don’t have wet dreams,” Kyuhyun replied, a little snippily. “And what’s that then, another bed?” He was hurt, really he was. They could spend so much time together, and yet he wanted another bed? He couldn’t keep the betrayal out of his voice. It took every bit of his self-control to stop him from shouting but I like us sleeping together like this.

“Yes,” the older boy said, and he dropped the box on their…Kyuhyun’s?…bed. “Help me assemble it?”

“No,” Kyuhyun replied, and got up to leave. He refused to help Zhou Mi break them apart. Not like this.

“But, but Kuixian?” He sounded pitiful, confused, so Kyuhyun didn’t look at him.

“No,” he replied, and walked out of there, heading towards the living room.

“How’d you like your present?” Sungmin asked cheerfully, accosting him in the hallway, and Kyuhyun blinked at him for a moment.

“What?”

“MiMi’s present. The bed.”

Kyuhyun wrinkled his nose. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

Sungmin looked confused. “But it’ll give you both more room…it’ll be comfortable! The two of us spent a long time finding a bed that would suit. It’s not girly, and it’s sturdy, and it has room to move. You’ll like it.”

Why did it matter if he’d like it or not? He shrugged. “He can sleep where he wants, I don’t care,” he grumbled in response.

Sungmin furrowed his brow, and then he said, “Oh, I see,” understanding lighting up his eyes. “He didn’t tell you, did he? He just said it was a bed.”

“Well, yeah,” Kyuhyun replied. “He didn’t say it was a present, just that it would be more comfortable than sleeping together in my bed.”

“Oh Kyuhyun,” Sungmin said, and then he shoved Kyuhyun back towards his and Zhou Mi’s room. “Let him explain.” He poked his head around the door and Kyuhyun, looking over Sungmin’s head could see the older screwing poles together, building a frame. It was much larger than Kyuhyun had expected, so he presumed that they were looking at it lengthways. “Mi~,” he said cheerfully.

The other man turned his head and gave a sad smile to Sungmin, before turning back to the bed. “Kuixian got upset and ran off,” he mumbled. “I don’t understand. It’s not like I’m leaving him.”

“You aren’t?” Kyuhyun asked, over Sungmin’s shoulder, before he could help it.

“Of course I’m not,” Zhou Mi replied. “What do you take me for? This is a queen-sized bed. It’s for both of us, so we’ll feel more comfortable.”

When he said it like that, Kyuhyun didn’t know why he’d doubted him in the first place. Zhou Mi was too nice to buy them two separate beds after all, and although it was cramped in one, it would be much more comfortable in a bigger bed. He pushed the door open and ran to give the older boy a hug. “Thank you,” he breathed into Zhou Mi’s neck.

“Glad to see you’ve got your lover’s tiff sorted out, I’ll be off before you christen that bed. Bye,” Sungmin said quickly, and shut the door behind him.

Kyuhyun ignored Sungmin and just held on tighter, before finally letting go and helping the older boy build the large bed, feeling much better now he knew what it was. It was a good present, after all. (It was such a good present that when Zhou Mi left to make them food, he couldn’t resist bouncing on top of the large mattress they’d brought in, pregnancy weight and all. Zhou Mi never had to know…)

---

Two months later, when Kyuhyun was still fairly large, despite the exercise the other members had been making him take—on a little treadmill they’d bought just for him—in order to lose the baby fat, Kyuhyun was awoken early not by the baby, but by a phone ringing. He yawned and stretched over Zhou Mi, grabbing at the table. He found what he was looking for and pulled it to his ear, covering the older boy’s mouth as he began to protest about being woken up by the noise.

“Yeoboseyo?” Kyuhyun asked sleepily.

“Darling!” he heard. “Did I wake you? I’m very sorry, but I wanted to say that we’re coming over for a visit today! Isn’t that exciting? I want you to look your best! We should be over in several hours, we’re just leaving home now. I hope your house is tidy! Has Hyukjae been cleaning recently? Your father says hello and we’ll see you soon! I’ll let you get up now, Love! See you later!”

“Annyeonghaseyo, Umma,” Kyuhyun replied, and yawned again, pressing the hang up button. “My mother,” he explained unnecessarily, dropping the phone onto the quilt covering Zhou Mi’s chest and cuddling up close on the other’s side of the bed. “Mm. Warm.”

“What did she want?”

Kyuhyun shrugged. “She’s coming over.” He paused, and then sat up frantically. “Omo! She’s coming over, they’re both coming over! What are we going to do?” He flailed in the air. “What are we going to do with Hyemi? What are we going to do about me? I have s. They’re going to notice!”

“Calm down, Kuixian,” Zhou Mi said. He sat up and patted Kyuhyun’s shoulder gently. “We’ll work something out. We can say…”

“Anything you say is going to sound weird. If you say it’s a dare, or it’s a course I’m doing, or if I just wanted to try it out. It’s going to sound weird. And it’s not like I can hide it under clothes. She’s going to hug me. She’s going to notice.” He lifted his hands to push his hair out of his eyes and realised he was crying. He sniffed.

“Oh, Kuixian, it’ll be fine,” Zhou Mi told him, pulling Kyuhyun against him. He rubbed Kyuhyun’s back under the other boy’s shirt.

“They’re my parents,” Kyuhyun mumbled. “My parents. They’re going to think I’m a freak. My father’s going to think—” He broke off, shaking his head. His father was going to think he was gay, that it was some sort of gay thing, having baby fat, having been pregnant, having a child, bringing her up with another guy, being the mother. To be honest, he could see his father’s point. It was fairly gay. Their entire relationship was fairly gay. If they kissed, if they were any more intimate than they were currently, if they acknowledged how close they were, they really would be gay. He shoved it into a box in the back of his mind and tried not to think of it. “Maybe I could pretend I had a one night stand with a fan? But then they’d ask why I had her, why her mother couldn’t have taken her.” He sniffed again. “And it wouldn’t explain these.” He pressed his hands to his chest, cupping slightly. He winced slightly, because his s hurt.

“Couldn’t we bind them?” Zhou Mi suggested. “We should have some gauze around somewhere. Lixu will know. And we can always say we fed you a lot and that’s why you have this.” He patted Kyuhyun’s stomach.

Kyuhyun nodded. “Okay then, let’s do that, but what about Hyemi?”

“We could let Grandma borrow her for the day?” Zhou Mi said. “I’m sure Leeteuk-hyung would love to look after her. And he’d be able to convince them he was looking after her for a trainee or something if they asked.”

“We can always try,” Kyuhyun said with a sigh, and relaxed against Zhou Mi’s front. “I’m glad I’ve got you to help with these things,” he mumbled a little sappily, head pressed into Zhou Mi’s chest.

Zhou Mi laughed lightly and Kyuhyun looked up to see that he was smiling gently at him. “You’re welcome,” he said, grinning. “Alright, up you come.” He somehow got them both standing and he began to undress, grabbing clothes from their wardrobe and pulling them on. He then pulled Kyuhyun, who had managed to slide his pyjama trousers off and was standing there in boxers and a t-shirt, out of their room and along to the kitchen, where Ryeowook was cooking breakfast. “Lixu, where’s the First Aid kit?”

“Are you hurt?” Ryeowook turned, eyes wide. He hurried over to the sink, opening the cupboard beneath it and pulling out the case.

“No, no. Kuixian’s parents are visiting, so we’re trying to hide everything. I thought the kit might have some gauze?”

Ryeowook opened the box and hunted through it, coming up with a reel. “Here,” he said, and handed it to Zhou Mi, who took it gratefully and tugged Kyuhyun back to their bedroom.

“Why couldn’t I just have stayed here?” Kyuhyun whined. “It’s cold out there.”

“Shh,” Zhou Mi told him, and tugged off Kyuhyun’s pyjama shirt before taking an end of the gauze and starting to wind it around Kyuhyun’s chest.

“Ow,” Kyuhyun hissed, when the gauze hit one of his s. He jerked back slightly. “It hurts.”

“You think everything hurts,” Zhou Mi mumbled. “I can touch you and it’ll hurt.” He brushed a with his thumb pointedly. Kyuhyun tugged away.

“Ow!” He flinched, pouting. Zhou Mi stopped wrapping the gauze.

“If it hurts that much I’m sure we can find another method,” he told Kyuhyun, looking at him a little worriedly.

Kyuhyun shook his head. “It’ll take too long. I’ll try to ignore the pain.”

It hurt a lot, because not only were his s sore, his entire chest was. His s were still producing milk and they protested at being moved and being pressed, trapped, tightly against his chest under the fabric, and they leaked a little. He winced when he moved but bit his lip to stop from crying out. This had to work; they had no other choice. He bit his lip against the build-up of tears in his eyes and hoped that his parents wouldn’t question any of it. He didn’t want to lie to them but he had to, and if they asked he’d tell them everything…he wouldn’t be able to help it. They were his parents.

They finished binding his chest and Zhou Mi helped him to put a t-shirt on, before finding him a pair of clean jeans to wear. It never stopped hurting but Kyuhyun began to ignore it and tried to act normally. Hopefully his parents wouldn’t take long to arrive and would leave soon after; the sooner they left, the sooner they could unwind the gauze. He counted it down to hours.

---

Zhou Mi took Hyemi, along with two bottles of expressed baby milk from their fridge and a bag of nappies and baby toys up to the top floor, where Leeteuk happily took the baby, settling her on his hip, as Donghae ran around and wiggled his fingers in her face. She gripped them with her hands and gurgled happily and made other meaningless noises, and Zhou Mi thanked them gratefully before hurrying back down to their flat and Kyuhyun.

Kyuhyun was rocking backwards and forwards on a kitchen chair, a spoon in his mouth and a bowl of rice before him. He looked like he was panicking. Zhou Mi ran his hand soothingly down the younger boy’s back and took the spoon out of his mouth. Kyuhyun looked like he was going to cry and there was nothing Zhou Mi wanted more than to kiss him, but he couldn’t. Kyuhyun didn’t want him like that. So instead, he spooned up some rice and held it up to Kyuhyun’s mouth.

Kyuhyun blinked up at him with a look that suggested are you serious and Zhou Mi smiled, so Kyuhyun sighed and let him feed him.

Kyuhyun had almost finished the bowl when the doorbell rang, and he flailed and looked like he wanted to run and hide. Zhou Mi slid a hopefully soothing hand through his hair, gave his hand a squeeze, and then went to answer it. He could see Kyuhyun’s parents through the little hole in the door.

He’d met them before, twice. They seemed very nice people, but he could understand why Kyuhyun was worried. He pasted a cheery smile on his face and opened the door to let them in.

“Good morning, Mr and Mrs Cho!” he chirped, pulling back so they could pass.

“Hello, Joo Myuk,” Kyuhyun’s mother said, as she always did when she saw him, her tongue not able to pronounce his name properly. She’d never changed from the original Korean name that nobody else used to the more standard Jo Mi. “How’ve you been?”

“Oh, very well, and yourself?” he said conversationally. “Very well” wasn’t exactly true; they still got woken up a lot, although Hyemi’s sleep pattern had settled and they were far more used to it now. But he felt much better than he had a month or so ago, so he didn’t feel like he was lying.

“Happy that the summer is coming,” she replied, and they laughed together. Kyuhyun’s father smiled at their interaction. The first time he’d met him, Zhou Mi had been intimidated by the fact he seemed so stern. But he really loved Kyuhyun, and he wanted the best for him. He was the kind of parent Zhou Mi was happy Kyuhyun had.

“So, where’s our son? I’m surprised he isn’t already here,” Kyuhyun’s father mused, and his lips quirked again at the joke; Kyuhyun loved his parents but he was never the first one to greet them when they came to visit, always saying he had better things to be doing.

“I’ll get him,” Zhou Mi told them. “Please make yourselves comfortable.” He indicated the sofas and watched them settle themselves before heading back into the kitchen. “Kuixian, you’re being silly,” he scolded lightly.

“I’m scared,” Kyuhyun replied, gripping the table and looking up at him with shining, watery eyes.

Zhou Mi simply grabbed his hand and tugged him through to the living room without giving him time to calm down. They’d think he was happy to see them anyway; it was fine.

“Umma, Appa,” Kyuhyun said nervously, letting go of the older boy’s hand, and his mother gasped before hugging him close to her.

“Oh Kyuhyun, what’s happened to you?”

“I think all the gaming has finally got to me,” he joked shakily. “You always said it would. But it’s okay, I’ve been trying to work it off.” He indicated the treadmill in the corner of the room with an awkward nod.

Kyuhyun’s mother looked worried, despite her son’s reassurances. “It’s just…” She placed a hand on Kyuhyun’s stomach and Zhou Mi could tell that Kyuhyun was so grateful that this hadn’t been five months earlier, when that action would have told his parents everything.

Zhou Mi knew why they had to keep it a secret, but he felt sad that their daughter would never know her real maternal grandparents. He loved Leeteuk and Kangin, but they were nothing on blood relatives. He wished he could tell his own parents, too, that they were grandparents of a tiny little girl, the prettiest girl in the universe and one half of the centre of his world, the other half being Kyuhyun, but although his parents were more lenient than most Chinese parents, letting their son live several countries away in a flat with a load of other boys whilst singing for a living, he didn’t think Kyuhyun would be okay with them knowing. If Kyuhyun didn’t want them to know, he wouldn’t tell them.

“I know, Umma,” Kyuhyun mumbled. “I’m sorry.”

She shook her head. “It’s okay. You’re still my son, no matter what you look like.” Zhou Mi thought his heart might burst from the amount of swelling those words caused, and he was once again grateful that Kyuhyun had such loving parents.

After asking if they wanted anything to eat or drink, which they didn’t, Zhou Mi snuck back into the kitchen to give them some privacy. He could hear low mumbles but their voices didn’t rise so he supposed they hadn’t discovered anything.

Kyuhyun came back in an hour later after Zhou Mi heard the front door shut and although Kyuhyun swore he wasn’t upset, the older could see the tell-tale sign of pooling tears. Once they were back in their room and they’d pulled off the gauze, letting him breathe properly again, he tugged Kyuhyun close and the younger boy sobbed into his neck. Zhou Mi simply let him, because he knew that he needed it.

---

During the next two months, Hyemi began to sit on her own, and rather swiftly went from sitting to rolling over and then to crawling—much faster than her parents expected her to. Crawling meant they had to put things away, like the Wii, which Eunhyuk was not happy about, and Yesung’s turtle tank, although why it was on the floor where Hyemi could reach it none of them knew, and Hyaku and Sen, who were cattishly amused by the baby wanting to cuddle them. Kyuhyun was grateful they didn’t have Heebum’s temperament, or she would have been in pain from the scratches and he would have kicked Sungmin to hell and back, other best friend or not.

Her first teeth, her bottom front incisors, started growing in soon after, seemingly painless because Kyuhyun didn’t even notice them until they had started showing, and Hyemi wasn’t making a fuss about them hurting.

He couldn’t believe his daughter was so old so soon. It was like the months had flown by.

They’d had no schedules he’d been a part of, and their company had avoided all questions about him not appearing, saying he was focusing on his studies and taking a brief break (which the fans were not happy with but it wasn’t like they could do anything about it). He was relaxing and losing the weight steadily, gaining his skinny physique back fairly quickly. And when he held his daughter in his arms, or watched her kiss Sungmin or giggle up at Leeteuk or crawl around their shoes in front of the sofa, he couldn’t think of anything in the world he’d rather be doing.

It all fell apart the next month.

---

That month was a blow to them as a band and also as a family. Kangin had got into some trouble that couldn’t be covered up—how stupid could you be to drive drunk, really, Kyuhyun wondered—and had decided the only way out of it was to enter the army early. Kyuhyun had sobbed when he’d found out, not caring that he was crying shamelessly, childishly, in front of all of them. He’d almost punched Kangin, he was so upset, but held back only through good self-control. Some of the other members were upset too, but none like him. Leeteuk was stony-faced but dry-eyed, and Eunhyuk and Ryeowook were misty-eyed and cuddling each other, and Heechul was fuming, silently glaring, but nobody was crying as hard as him. But they hadn’t had him like he had. They hadn’t had Appa Kangin calming their nerves the way he had. He loved Kangin. He didn’t want to lose him.

It was when he was trying to stop crying that Han Geng stood up. “I’m sorry,” he said, in strongly Mandarin-accented Korean. “I’m so sorry. But you must know, and now’s as good a time…” He broke off and sighed, also misty-eyed, and Siwon stood next to him, his hand in the small of his back. He explained that Han Geng was sometimes so sick he couldn’t breathe, but he didn’t want to worry them. He explained that he, Heechul and Leeteuk had known for a long time this might happen. He explained that the older man was leaving them. It made sense, really it did. But Kyuhyun didn’t know what to think.

The maknae, weak from the energy he’d exerted not beating up Kangin, stood up silently and headed to his and Zhou Mi’s room, where he covered himself in the blanket and sobbed loudly into the bed. He couldn’t believe this was happening. He didn’t deserve this.

They couldn’t be ten. He thought his heart might break.

---

Kyuhyun began to night wean Hyemi over that month, as the stress from losing two of their members made him much less happy to feed Hyemi at night. She took to it surprisingly well, only needing Zhou Mi to whisper to her a couple of times that she should let Mama sleep during the night and sleep along with him, before she became used to the fact she wasn’t going to be fed.

Speaking of food, she now had eight baby teeth and Zhou Mi had suggested they start her on solid food.

She wasn’t so keen on yoghurt when they gave her some but she loved apple sauce and could go through entire jars of it in one sitting. The more solid food they gave her, the less she wanted to feed, until she stopped almost completely, only feeding when she was upset or anxious about something.

Feeding her and watching her throw mush around Ryeowook’s spotless kitchen made Kyuhyun much calmer because it was familiar, routine. He soon became used to the idea of being part of a ten member band—it didn’t matter if they were ten, or thirteen, or fifteen, not really, because they would always be together as a family—and was even somewhat accepting of it.

Not long after, his milk supply dried up and his chest went back to being flat, which was a relief after such a long time of looking too much like a woman for comfort. His stomach was also much smaller now, and it wasn’t long before he made the decision to become active with Super Junior again. Their manager was ecstatic and they began recording within the week Kyuhyun decided he could leave the house without feeling self-conscious, and had stood in the car park of their block of flats for twenty minutes beaming at the sky and spinning in circles, so happy that he could finally leave.

They left Hyemi in the presence of a stylist Noona, sometimes at their house and sometimes at the recording studio. Hyemi liked the outings after eight months of being kept indoors (Kyuhyun thought it was cruel, but what else was he supposed to do? The fangirls would have noticed even if someone else took her outside), and she would bounce happily when she realised they were walking down to the car.

The album was recorded quickly, and promotions were steadily coming. Kyuhyun threw himself into a fierce fitness and dieting regime in order to lose the last of the pregnancy weight and was satisfied with the results, which left him fitter and less anorexic-looking than he’d appeared two years earlier, but still slim.

Their single, when released, hit the top of the charts and Kyuhyun spent five minutes cuddling Hyemi to his chest and screaming happily down the phone to Zhou Mi at home and thinking that there was nothing better than that.

---

By a few months before her birthday, Hyemi could understand both forms of her name. She understood that Kyuhyun called her Hyemi and everyone else called her Haimi. She still only gurgled and made sounds though, using correct tones for each language they spoke to her in. The first time she said something vaguely Mandarin, Zhou Mi burst into tears because he was so happy. Kyuhyun rolled his eyes. “Your Baba is such a cry-baby,” he told Hyemi, but he was smiling. She giggled back.

Around this time, she began to walk, moving steadily along the side of their sofa, gripping onto it tightly so she wouldn’t fall. Zhou Mi got her to walk two steps holding his hand and he nearly asphyxiated Kyuhyun, he hugged him so hard.

“Our little girl’s so grown up!” he wept, and Henry, who was playing a video game with Eunhyuk, pretended to gag, whilst Sungmin knitted and Yesung, on the floor, held his smallest turtle, letting it walk over his hands.

Kyuhyun simply rolled his eyes and watched Yesung try to hold his turtle out of Hyemi’s reach. She was standing on Yesung’s lap and using his hair to stay upright and Kyuhyun was pretty sure she was winning.

“She’s so your daughter,” Sungmin said fondly from the sofa, watching her. “She even bullies Yesung-hyung like you. It’s so cute.”

Henry giggled as Yesung glared at Sungmin, holding his turtle even higher, and Eunhyuk mumbled something about how Yesung-hyung should have known better than to sit on the floor with a baby learning to walk down there with him.

Kyuhyun didn’t rescue Yesung, because Eunhyuk was right, and the older man definitely had a lesson to learn about sitting where Hyemi could reach him.

---

Hyemi’s first real word was said a month before her birthday. It was “tle”, presumably short for “turtle”, and was said when she was trying to take one from Yesung again. “Tle!” she repeated, demanding, and stomped a tiny foot in annoyance. Considering she was standing on Yesung, Kyuhyun thought it probably hurt, even if she wasn’t that heavy. He beamed, proud of her for being so ruthless as to try and take the turtle from Yesung without even asking.

“Ask Oppa nicely,” Yesung grumbled, “and maybe Oppa will let you hold Ddangkkomehng. Say “please”!”

Instead of saying the word, Hyemi tried to climb further up his body, pulling his arm down as she did, moving the turtle closer to her.

“Hyemi,” Kyuhyun said, looking briefly away from his book, glasses perched on his nose. “Let Yesung-oppa go.”

Hyemi, who had turned towards him when he said her name, frowned and looked like she was going to start crying, so Kyuhyun sighed and lifted her from Yesung, sitting her on his knee and then tickling her.

When Zhou Mi came in from shopping, Kyuhyun said, “Hyemi said her first word! Yesung-hyung should be proud. Apparently she likes turtles.”

“I can’t believe I wasn’t here. My girl’s all grown up and saying words!” He moved her from Kyuhyun onto his own lap and cuddled her. She hugged him back.

“Baba!” she squealed, and pressed an opened-mouthed, wet kiss to his nose.

Kyuhyun didn’t think he’d ever seen a smile as wide and toothy as Zhou Mi’s was then.

---

Hyemi’s birthday went by pretty uneventfully, followed by a quiet Christmas. The months flew by, including Kyuhyun’s twenty-fifth, and finally Super Junior M released their second full length album. Kyuhyun panicked because that always entailed Chinese promoting, and what would happen with Hyemi?

Someone, possibly Super Junior M’s manager, decided it would be a great idea to get hold of a baby visa for several months and therefore allow Kyuhyun to take her with him. Even though he argued about the fans in the airport, their manager argued that one of the assistants could carry her and pretend she was theirs. They’d find a way. There was no way he could leave her behind in Seoul for over a month, even if he left her in Leeteuk’s more than capable hands, they argued, and the fans would have fits if Kyuhyun didn’t promote with the rest—even with the addition of Sungmin and Eunhyuk to lessen the loss of Han Geng. This was true, and so Kyuhyun agreed to the idea, and that was how he found himself climbing off a plane into the warmth of China’s climate, their manager’s assistant holding Hyemi a little uncomfortably. She wasn’t happy with not being held by one of her parents, and she hadn’t liked the plane at all, but Donghae her dark hair as he walked alongside the assistant and she slipped off to sleep, tired from all the crying. Once they had their luggage and had escaped the screaming fans, many of whom seemed intrigued by the baby, if the pointing fingers had been any indication, they hurried to the waiting car and Zhou Mi took Hyemi from the thankful assistant and held her close to him comfortingly, knowing that being in a strange place had to be hard for her, even if she was asleep.

Soon they were in their Chinese dorms, where Kyuhyun set up a travel cot in his and Zhou Mi’s room and wondered how having Hyemi there was going to work, because taking a baby to all their events could be quite dangerous, especially if they were outside. It wasn’t like he could take everything as it came, either; he had to be prepared for everything. He spent the next few days discussing plans with stylists and assistants, making sure that they knew exactly what to do, how to look after Hyemi, and what to say if people asked who she was. He was going to try his hardest to make sure it was okay.

They were only in China for a month and two weeks, before jetting to Taiwan for another couple of weeks (where Kyuhyun ate so much he became very fat again—as he so cheerfully said on radio shows—and people incessantly about his weight—then again, they all put weight on in Taiwan), and finally then going home, but it was long enough. Kyuhyun spent most of those days on tenterhooks, wondering if someone was going to lose Hyemi, or tell him there had been an accident, or tell him somebody had kidnapped her. He ran around like a madman, making sure she was absolutely fine and nobody had touched her. Zhou Mi said he was being a good parent, but Kyuhyun knew that Henry, in particular, thought he was being overprotective. He was distracted on TV shows and once or twice he almost forgot his lines in live performances. It wasn’t good for his health or his image.

Although Kyuhyun loved their music and he loved being in China, he had never been happier to get off the plane in Korea and settle back into his double bed, because sleeping in two singles pushed together had been awkward, and his relaxing Korean life where he did nothing except wait for Ryeowook and Sungmin and their writer Hyungdeul to finish writing Super Junior’s fifth album. After all, being in a foreign country had been entirely stressful, even with his Hyungdeul with him. It was much better to be in a country where he understood the language and could go out without needing a babysitter. He had other Hyungdeul to look after Hyemi; people he’d known since he’d been a teenager. People he loved, trusted. It made it so much better.

---

In May 2012, plans for a project group called SM The Ballad were dredged up from the depths where SM Entertainment had shoved them after Dong Bang Shin Ki had split up, as Junsu had originally been in the group. Kyuhyun had thought he’d been another member, but he wasn’t sure until Super Junior’s manager told him he’d be debuting with the project group in June alongside SHINee’s Jonghyun, TRAX’s Jay and a kid called Jinho who’d won SM’s Everysing contest fairly recently.

Kyuhyun couldn’t deny that he was excited.

He loved ballads, so he enjoyed the songs they were given to sing, and he liked s. Jonghyun was a good friend of his since trainee days, Jay was nice, and the new kid, who went by Jino due to there already being a Jinho in the business already, was sweet, if a little naïve and blatantly adoring. Their voices went together well as they recorded, and they were fun to be with, even if Jay acted like they were his annoying little brothers. Jino was fun to tease, though; he got so indignant about it. Kyuhyun thought it was hilarious.

It was a few weeks, maybe a month before they were to have their first performance when his ears started ringing, almost constantly, and Zhou Mi flailed when he told him, immediately begging their manager to allow him a doctor’s appointment.

The doctor advised surgery, because Kyuhyun’s hearing was badly damaged from a particularly horrid ear infection he’d had as a teenager that had never healed, and he jumped at the chance.

Singing after the surgery was a bit uncomfortable, but he kept it up, not wanting to let his bandmates down. He had other issues, though, he thought. His eyelids were starting to droop, and he made an appointment with SM’s plastic surgeon to fix them once again after the first week of SM The Ballad promotions. When people asked why he was wearing sunglasses he claimed it was his concept, and the other boys laughed alongside him. They knew the truth.

He enjoyed singing with people other than his Super Junior members, and guesting on radio shows with them as their leader and the eldest when Jay was busy with his own personal schedules, but that didn’t stop him from going home at the end of the night, collapsing into bed with Zhou Mi and hoping for Super Junior activities to start again soon.

---

The chance to be in the musical was something he’d never have expected. He’d auditioned on a whim; he loved The Three Musketeers. He’d never been in a musical before, so he didn’t know how to do anything, but he was sure they’d teach him.

When he was accepted for the role of D’Artagnan, he couldn’t have been happier. It was like all his efforts had paid off.

The older, more experienced actors were good to him, understanding that he was inexperienced but eager to learn, and perfectly allowing for the fact that he regularly had to go home early, cutting their rehearsals short. It just made him practise harder, until he knew his lines off by heart.

The kiss scene was awkward, but there was nothing he could do about it. At least he didn’t actually have to kiss her, and the fans wouldn’t see anything, anyway. Though he didn’t always understand why he couldn’t do it. It was just a kiss, from people who weren’t even dating. What right did the fans have to say who he could and couldn’t kiss? But of course they thought they owned him, so he couldn’t.

The opening night of his musical, all those months of hard work later, so many of his bandmates were there, watching him. Jino was there with Eunhyuk and several of the trainees. Zhou Mi. Sungmin. Donghae. His parents, too; watching him with admiration in their eyes. He worked as hard as he could for them, and was happily exhausted when the final bow came. He’d given his all.

Over the next month he worked as hard as he could, and was content with the results. His voice was good for musicals, he was steady and could memorise his lines well, also adlibbing just as well as the experienced performers did. All the best to make the performance as exciting for his audience as possible.

He wouldn’t be against having another musical, but he certainly wasn’t going to be in a rush to head out to find the next one.

---

Super Show 3 was bigger and grander than ever before. They flew between so many Asian countries; Vietnam, Malaysia, Thailand, Taiwan, the Philippines, Singapore. The venues were bigger, the shows brighter, hundreds of fans screaming their names. They had so much fun at those concerts.

It was also one of the first times they’d been smacked in the face with food, light-sticks and boards their fans had been holding with their faces on them. Heechul had got a cut under his eye and gone storming off. Even Kyuhyun had been hit with flying objects. It made them scared, but they couldn’t stop. They had to keep performing for their fans.

Only their fans seemed to think following them was a good idea, in cars, causing traffic jams and collisions. And Leeteuk was too nice to tell them off for it, even though they caused an accident where people could have been hurt. Thankfully they weren’t, but Kyuhyun was still worried. He was so glad he had gone home early to see to Hyemi.

He loved performing, really, he did. And that was the risk you took, to be a performer. But injuries caused by fans were not what he’d signed up for. His car accident had been bad enough. He should have had a fear of cars after it, but he didn’t.

Until he nearly collided with a truck. His car had been switching lanes, on the way to the final, encore performance of his musical in the middle of SS3, during a break between performances, and it had been so scary. He’d thought he was going to die.

When he was safe, he snuggled Hyemi as tightly as he could and sobbed, knowing he would never trust another car again.

---

Shortly after SS3 finished, SM Entertainment threw another tour at them, only this time for all its artists. SM Town in Paris. And Kyuhyun wasn’t allowed to take Hyemi.

Leaving her behind for the three days in Paris was one of the hardest things he had ever done, even though he trusted Zhou Mi to look after her. He wouldn’t let anything happen to her, and Kyuhyun had a job to do. He had to entertain the European fans.

Standing on stage, looking at all the non-Asian girls looking up at him and screaming his name, Super Junior’s names, all their names, and at the sea of sapphire blue light-sticks, he knew it was all for the best. He could entertain them and be a mother at the same time. He just had to trust she would be okay and do his absolute best.

So he did.

---

Almost immediately upon arriving back in Seoul, Shindong announced the date of his wedding. It was that weekend. Apparently he’d been keeping it a secret from them all.

It was lucky Kyuhyun had a tux.

The wedding, since its date hadn’t been leaked to the press, was a quiet affair. Subtle, tasteful. Nari’s dress was so pretty and her hair was done beautifully. Kyuhyun was almost jealous of Shindong for having such a lovely wife. Shindong also looked good, smart. He was in a black tux that looked slimming.

Since there weren’t many women there to catch Nari’s bouquet, the Super Junior members all decided to go up for a laugh. They didn’t really want to catch it, but it seemed like fun.

Kyuhyun wanted to stay sitting down with his plate of wedding cake and kimchi rice, but Zhou Mi bullied him into going and standing with him, the older man bouncing on his feet excitedly. Kyuhyun bet that Zhou Mi actually wanted to catch it. He’d always seemed the marrying type, though it was hard to be in a boyband. Although Kyuhyun couldn’t even see Zhou Mi with a girlfriend.

He was mentally analysing Zhou Mi’s girlfriend history just out of interest, when Zhou Mi shouted out, “Oh, it’s coming here,” and he shoved Kyuhyun forwards. Kyuhyun threw out his arms for balance and the bouquet fell straight into his arms.

“It appears that Kyuhyun’s going to be the next bride,” Sungmin said cheerfully, wrapping an arm around Henry’s shoulders. “I think we should applaud him. He’ll look very pretty in a dress once he loses some of that food weight.”

“It’s not my fault I’m always hungry, Taiwan was mean to me,” Kyuhyun replied with a grumble. “Anyway, why would I be in a dress, Hyung?”

“Because you caught the bouquet,” Sungmin said with a laugh. “And you’re blatantly a girl. Congratulations.”

Kyuhyun glared at Sungmin, mentally plotting ways to shut him up, and completely missed Zhou Mi’s grin.

---

It was a quiet day in October when they fell apart.

Maybe Kyuhyun was being hormonal, but it seemed like every time he walked into his bedroom, Zhou Mi was there with Hyemi. He walked with her, talked with her, and Hyemi snuggled him and called him her Baba and blatantly liked him best, and maybe Kyuhyun was just being jealous, but he exploded.

“I never get any time with her,” he all but shouted. “You’re always there. I can’t do anything. I can’t feed her, or bathe her, or play with her, or read to her, because you’re always there. Doing it for me. Can’t you just go away?”

Zhou Mi froze, and his cheeks went pale. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I had no idea I was making you feel like this. I’m not trying to replace you, Kuixian.” He stepped forwards, arms out to hold Kyuhyun, but Kyuhyun out with his hands, effectively knocking Zhou Mi away from him.

“No,” Kyuhyun said. “Just leave. Please.”

Zhou Mi opened and shut his mouth and then walked out of their room. He didn’t come back, though Kyuhyun hadn’t heard the front door open, so he knew Zhou Mi was still in the house.

He knew he’d overreacted a little, but who could blame him? Zhou Mi had been taking over, taking control, at a rather alarming pace. It had just taken him until then to notice.

Since she’d already had a bath, Kyuhyun played with her, and had a quiet, childlike conversation with her which didn’t involve her Baba but rather Yesung-oppa’s turtles, and he felt better the longer the time he spent with her. Finally he tucked her up into bed and climbed into his own, which was suddenly too big, too cold and too intimidating for one person.

He didn’t sleep well at all that night.

He avoided Zhou Mi for the entire following day, skirting Hyemi’s questions about where Baba was, and realised that it wasn’t nearly as fun on his own, without someone else to for doing her nappy wrong, or telling him he was bathing her wrong. She wouldn’t even eat everything he gave her.

“Mama, where Baba?” she asked for what seemed like the tenth time, and Kyuhyun sighed.

“He’ll be back later,” he promised her. He just needed some time away from him.

He couldn’t even get to sleep that night, and decided to shove all his pride away. His body was used to sleeping with another one, and Hyemi didn’t want to sleep in the bed with him. Zhou Mi’s toys didn’t substitute for his warmth, so he only had one option.

He padded out into the hallway in his pyjamas and followed the slight light that glinted from the television, where Zhou Mi was lying. He hadn’t gone to share with Yesung, then, Kyuhyun mused. Since Yesung had a spare bed, now Ryeowook had moved upstairs (although Kyuhyun wasn’t sure why, since he was almost positive they were still dating), he’d have thought he’d have used it. But apparently not.

“MiMi-ge,” Kyuhyun mumbled, and swallowed thickly. “Please come to bed.”

Zhou Mi turned, tiredly, to face him, and Kyuhyun could see the bags under his eyes, and it was only the second day with no communication. “Why?” he asked.

“I’m sorry,” Kyuhyun told him. “Please. I can’t sleep without you. Can you sleep without me?”

Zhou Mi sighed and shook his head, before turning off the television. “Alright,” he said, and Kyuhyun took his hand and led him back to their bedroom, where they crawled into bed.

Kyuhyun woke up feeling fully rested and completely tangled in Zhou Mi’s limbs, and he apologised profusely to Zhou Mi for being jealous. He never wanted anything like that to happen again. It had been horrible.

Zhou Mi obviously felt the same way as he apologised too. “I’ll be sure to share the chores with you more regularly now,” he said kindly.

“I was just jealous, but I know she loves us both,” Kyuhyun admitted quietly.

Zhou Mi hugged him gently and Kyuhyun knew it would be alright.

---

It was November 2012 when Heechul mentioned that he wanted to leave Super Junior to focus on his acting life. It wasn’t the first time they’d heard it; they’d had this discussion around their third album, but Heechul had stayed through it and through their fourth and fifth albums because he loved their members and fans. Heechul had always been an actor first, and although he’d stayed with them for two albums without Han Geng and Kangin and three without Kibum, and although Kangin was coming back from the army in a short while, he couldn’t do it any longer. Heechul also had to head off to the army in a few short months, along with Leeteuk, and thought it would be easier without band-related distractions.

After Heechul made his choice, Shindong also said he wanted to quit, to focus on his marriage with Nari and his comedy. This also wasn’t surprising, as the members knew Shindong hated to be away from his wife, and he hadn’t exactly had many parts in their recent albums.

With only eight members of the band remaining, and the fans rioting, the boys came to a decision which saddened them; they would dissolve Super Junior amicably. Their manager wanted to keep part of the brand going; Super Junior KRY. Kyuhyun loved singing and knew he wanted to sing forever, so he was perfectly happy to continue it. Yesung and Ryeowook also enjoyed singing and agreed to continue their trio, despite knowing that Yesung would have to leave for his own army service within the next few years.

Singing with at least two of his band members made the break-up far less painful for Kyuhyun. They didn’t do any big shows, but they were together, and they performed for their fans, and Kyuhyun loved being in front of them, with his fellow members, singing his heart out, though he knew it was only temporary.

Although they were all still under SME and therefore allowed to stay in their dorms, all of them preferred to leave and get their own places away from the flats that held so many memories for them. Yesung, Ryeowook, Eunhyuk, Sungmin and Donghae moved into a large house together. Heechul moved in with Kibum. Leeteuk moved into Kangin’s flat, which Kangin had suggested via letter; he could tidy it up for him when he wasn’t there and then make sure he didn’t do anything else stupid when he was back.

This left Kyuhyun, Henry and Zhou Mi, as Shindong lived with Nari and Siwon still lived with his parents, although he was considering moving into Kibum and Heechul’s flat. Zhou Mi and Henry had been told, now that Super Junior M had been officially dissolved as well, along with its parent group, that they should go back to China and Canada. Henry wasn’t sure if he should or if he should move into the house with Sungmin and the others. Zhou Mi hadn’t said anything, though. Kyuhyun knew that he couldn’t bear it if the older moved back to China. He’d probably move in with Sungmin too, or get a house of his own. But he couldn’t really cope with looking after Hyemi on his own, not even now she was happy and chatty and growing up quickly.

It shouldn’t really have surprised Kyuhyun when Zhou Mi took him outside one day under the guise of a walk, leaving Hyemi with Sungmin, and then, once they reached an unfamiliar part of the neighbourhood, covered his eyes, saying he had a surprise for him.

“What is it?” Kyuhyun asked as he let the older boy lead him along the road until they stopped. Zhou Mi removed his hands and Kyuhyun realised he was looking up at a pretty and modern brick and glass block of flats.

Zhou Mi told him, “We’ve got a viewing for one on the ground floor. We’d have the garden at the back, and it has four bedrooms, so it’d be good for guests and Hyemi could have her own room, and we can use the other one as a study or a games room or something if you’d like.”

Kyuhyun couldn’t stop his eyes from welling up at the gesture. “Thank you,” he breathed.

“It’s a nice neighbourhood too; and the school’s nearby, so she wouldn’t have to walk far—”

Kyuhyun hugged him tightly at the thoughtfulness, and briefly entertained the thought of kissing him, before shoving it away—they were in public and they weren’t gay and he didn’t like Zhou Mi like that, he didn’t. It would be inappropriate on so many different levels. So he didn’t.

Once Kyuhyun had stopped crying, Zhou Mi led him to the front door, where they were greeted by a nice young Japanese man who smiled pleasantly at the both of them. “You’re coming to look at the house?” Once they nodded, he let them inside.

The flat was two floored. The kitchen was inside the door and next to it was the sitting room, and one of the bedrooms was at the end of the corridor. A small toilet was under the stairs, which led up to the second floor where the remaining three bedrooms were, along with the house bathroom. The master bedroom had a balcony which looked out on the garden, which was decently sized and covered in grass, with a few flowerbeds along the side.

“What do you think?” Zhou Mi asked quietly.

“It’s perfect,” Kyuhyun replied. He loved the atmosphere of the place. It was warm and loving and he knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life in that house. “I love it.”

“This is only the first house, do you need time to think—?” the older began, but Kyuhyun cut him off.

“No. This one. I want this one.”

Zhou Mi nodded and they left the house. Once out the door, he pulled out his phone and dialled a number. “Estate agent,” he explained to Kyuhyun and then told the person on the other end of the phone that they wanted the flat and asked what a good offer was.

“We’re buying it, not renting?” Kyuhyun asked.

“Well it’s not like we’re going to move again, so why not?” Zhou Mi replied. “It makes sense to buy it, really.”

Their estate agent bargained a decent price with the owner of the flat. He was happy to sell to them for their second offer, the first being too low, and quickly Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi found themselves the joint owner of that flat.

It only took them a week to move in, with the help of the other members, and that was that. Their own house.

The next few years passed in a daze, mostly. Hyemi started holding conversations, started walking without holding onto anything. Grew into a pretty little girl who copied her father’s mannerisms, but there was still so much of Kyuhyun in her. Kyuhyun adored her, even when she was naughty. It would have been impossible for him not to.