2012/02/20

 

"Kyungsoo hurry up!" informed a deep voice.

 

"Alright I'm almost done just give me a few more minutes!"

 

Kyungsoo was packing up the remaining few items that left deep impressions on him from the past. He took a last glance of the room that he shared with Jongin and heaved a loud sigh. It was his last day in his hometown in Gyeongsang before he embarked on his long awaited journey to Seoul to fulfill his dreams of becoming the world's famous singer. Meanwhile a gigantic figure was impatiently waiting outside his house, constantly pestering the round eyed ulzzang to hurry up. He wanted to spend some extra time with Kyungsoo before he left.

 

"Do you think Jongin will be there to send me off too?" Kyungsoo was filled with curiosity as he struggled walking down the stairs, carrying a humongous yet heavy luggage that was almost the same height as he was.

 

 

"Well...." Chanyeol replied awkwardly as he furiously scratched his head.

 

Kyungsoo knew that wasn't a good sign. The bright smile that was once fixated on his face disappeared within a few seconds.

 

Everyday after school, Jongin would go over to Kyungsoo's house. They had been childhood friends for 15 years as their parents were close friends. However Jongin couldn't experience the familial love from his parents for too long - It was drink driving. His father was an avid fan of alcohol.  His parents were on their way home but it was due to his father's carelessness that led to a fatal accident which time and money couldn't heal. Although Jongin was upset, he forgot about the incident after two years. Throughout 15 years of his time together with Kyungsoo, he finally found himself falling for the innocent Kyungsoo through his loving quality.

 

 

2001/05/14

 

 

 

"Make yourself comfortable, Jongin. Whatever is mine is now yours. If you're hungry I'll buy food for you, I'll take care of you now." Kyungsoo welcomed Jongin into his house. Ever since his parents incident, Jongin would often come over to Kyungsoo's house. It seemed as though it was also his own house. He could sleep there whenever he wanted, come over whenever he wanted. Whatever happened, Kyungsoo's parents were always fine with it.

 

They never failed to celebrate each others birthdays together.  Every year, Kyungsoo would make cards for Jongin.

" Give you a hug

 

Make you smile when you're down

 

Buy you whatever you want

 

Spend time with you

 

Be your servant for one whole day "

The cards always said the same thing, which made Jongin very happy. He never wanted expensive or branded gifts from anyone. He was more of the kind that liked sincerity. When Jongin was seven, he experienced a horrible nightmare that left him traumatised for a few days. Kyungsoo immediately came by his side and took out the card he made for Jongin that said ' make you smile when you're down '. Jongin nodded his head in agreement. Kyungsoo did whatever he could - from funny faces, to prancing around foolishly, to dancing horribly. Back then Jongin enrolled in ballet classes and enhanced his flexibility and skills. Kyungsoo never failed to cheer him up with his own horrendous dance routines.

 

2011/02/11

Kyungsoo was not doing very well in school. He was getting either Ds or Fs on the mini pop quizes that his teacher would give the class after every topic. It was tough for Kyungsoo. He thought the teachers were trying to demoralise him by giving him questions that he was weakest in. Since, Chanyeol was a year older than he was. he decided to consult him for extra lessons. Chanyeol was Kyungsoo's really good friend since the day he stepped in Gyeongsang High School. They established strong bonds between each other. He was more like Kyungsoo's advisor. Kyungsoo would always go to him whenever he had problems.

 

 

They would stay in school until eight at night to study. Kyungsoo found his grades slowly improving and couldn't help but thank Chanyeol.

 

 

"Thank you, goblin. You are a great teacher. I promise I'll do my best!"

 

 

Kyungsoo occasionally teased Chanyeol for his pointy ears by calling him a goblin. It made Chanyeol feel insecure about himself, but he liked it. The more the innocent brown eyed soul , the more he felt different towards Kyungsoo.

"Are you crazy? Call me a goblin one more time and I won't teach you anymore!"

 

But kyungsoo knew that Chanyeol never meant those words. Chanyeol knew that those were lies as well. He wanted to get closer to Kyungsoo.

 

2011/02/15

 

 

"Kyungsoo! Kyungsoo!" Jongin tried to scream his name but he was out of breath from trying to chase Kyungsoo. Thankfully, the round eyed boy turned around and saved Jongin from the trouble of screaming.

 

 

"Oh Hi Jongin!" He smiled politely.

 

 

Jongin always loved Kyungsoo's smlie. His heart would melt all the time and butterflies never failed to flutter in his stomach. It was a heavenly sight for Jongin.

 

"Are you coming home early today?"

"Sorry Jongn, I'll be studying with Chanyeol until eight today. So go on and eat dinner without me! Don't wait for me again, alright?"

Jongin never liked the fact that Kyungsoo was always with Chanyeol. He wanted Kyungsoo to spend more time with him. Envy and jelousy aways creeped within him when Chanyeol's name was mentioned. Some may call it selfish, but Jongin wanted Kyungsoo to himself. 

He stared at Kyungsoo in disbelief. "Why are you always with Chanyeol? When will you ever come home early? When can I spend time with you?"

"Jongin... Why are you like this?"

"I just want you to come home early, please? I want to spend as much time as we did in the past."

 

 

"I'm not doing very well in school. My grades were deteriorating but now that I have Chanyeol teaching me. they're actually getting better. I'm sorry Jongin, but I can't skip my study time."

 

Jongin started getting irritated. Why couldn't Kyungsoo just listen to him for a day? He was only concerned about Kyungsoo. "Why can't you just get someone else to teach you then? Like a tuition teacher? So you don't have to come home late?"

 

 

"Damn it Jongin, you're getting on my nerves! Stop it!"

Time stopped for Jongin. It was the first time Kyungsoo every expressed irritation and anger towards him and he wasn't used to it. Jongin never expected it. Kyungsoo had a reputation where he was always happy and maintained his cool. But it all changed. Jongin decided to back off, and took his solemn steps home.

Alone.

 

                                                                               ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___

 

                                                                                                                                       

Jongin waited nervously for Kyungsoo to come back home from his study session that he was displeased about. He wanted to apologise for his unacceptable behaviour towards Kyungsoo in school.

He heard the sound of the keys. He became alert and was waiting for the right moment.

Kyungsoo took off his shoes.

 

 

"Kyungsoo ah..." Jongin tried to gather his courage to apologise. He called out Kyungsoo's name silently out of fear. But Kyungsoo was still filled with anger. He ignored Jongin, went into his room and slammed the door behind him.

 

 

Jongin was shocked. He had never seen this side of Kyungsoo before. He knew that this was the start.

It was the day Jongin was going to get his results before he graduated from middle school. Everyone chattered loudly as they gathered in the hall, waiting anxioiusly to receive their final grades. But Jongin wasn't nervous. He was confident that he could do well considering how intelligent he was. 

"Kkamjong ah!"

That voice was very familiar. It gave Jongin a surprising amount of confidence. "It's Kyungsoo," he thought to himself. Sure enough, it really was him. 9 years of living with Kyungsoo and even his voice could be recognized in a large, noisy crowd.

 

"I skipped school today so I could receive your results with you! This is a very important day. I want you to enroll in Gyeongsang High School so we can be school mates together!" Kyungsoo exclaimed in excitement as he stared at Jongin with his dark brown eyes and that heart-shaped smile that melted Jongin's heart everytime. 

 

"Really? You should have gone to school Kyungsoo! This is not right!" He reprimanded Kyungsoo but deep inside he liked the fact that he was Kyungsoo's number one priority. Jongin was the happiest man alive. 

As he received his result slip, both were in shock. Jongin aced all his subjects which allowed him to enter any high school in Gyeongsang. 

 

"Daebak!" Kyungsoo was filled with happiness. A part of him was proud of Jongin like a father would be. He hugged Jongin tightly, with his cheeks pressing against Jongin's chest. 

 

Jongin was in shock.

 

He liked the feeling of being hugged by Kyungsoo. It was a whole new feeling from just loving the ulzzang. His heart pounded really fast. His feelings towards Kyungsoo was growing even fonder.

2011/03/14

 

Jongin was not getting used to the idea of Kyungsoo studying with Chanyeol. He felt uncomfortable. His mind would always be filled with the uncanny situations that could occur between the two. He had to put it to a stop, but he knew he couldn't. He did not want to make Kyungsoo upset or angry. Ever since he played with Kyungsoo's wrath, he was careful with his words and actions.  

2011/03/15

"Chanyeol how do you find this equation?" Kyungsoo never understood how to solve quadratic equations. Math was his weakest subject. And the thought of formulas and equations always dicombobulated him. 

 

 "It's really simple, I'll solve it for you."

 

Soon both of them found themselves indulged in their work. The classroom was filled with pin-drop silence.

 

"Kyungsoo..." Chanyeol stammered.

 

"What is it?" Kyungsoo questioned as he solved more equations on his notepad. He was writing so furiously that his handwriting became illegible.

 

"You know that..."

"Speak up I can't hear you!"

 

"You know that I like you right?"

 

Kyungsoo stopped writing. He did not dare to look up into Chanyeol's eyes. Little did he know, the boy with the narrow shoulders was secretly in love with him as well. After all the study sessions they had together, Kyungsoo was thankful for Chanyeol's help and found himself falling for him.

 

"I actually feel the same way..."

 

Chanyeol's face grew brighter than usual. He was elated that Kyungsoo felt the same way that he did. He was happy that he could be with the one he loved. They looked into each other's eyes passionately. Chanyeol leaned in slowly towards Kyungsoo and gave him a soft kiss on his lips while lightly grabbing his hair. Kyungsoo loved the feeling. He wanted more.

 

Unfortunately for Jongin, his biggest nightmare came true. He witnessed the scene. He witnessed everything as he coincidentally walked past the classroom Chanyeol and Kyungsoo were studying in. He felt a thousand needles pierce through his heart. He refused to believe it. But he couldn't. Tears welled up in his eyes but he instantly wiped them away.

 

He couldn't help but watch the man of his dreams fall for another man. 

2010/12/25

"Kyungsoo ah!" Jongin called out as he walked into Kyungsoo's room.

 

"Merry Christmas Jongin! I don't think Santa will be coming again this year. I've been waiting for so long, I'm starting to think he doesn't exist." Kyungsoo was so gullible. It worried Jongin that he thought Santa Claus really existed, but he still found it really adorable. 

 

"I would like to use this card now."

 

"Which is this? Be your servant for one day..." Kyungsoo read the words on the card out silently, " Are you crazy? It's Christmas! Why would you use it now?"

 

"You don't exactly have to be my servant, I just want you to do something for me."

 

"What is it?"

 

"Please sing for me. I always hear your beautiful voice while you're in the shower, and I'd like to hear it now."

 

Kyungsoo had a horrible habit of singing whenever he was in the shower. Jongin always reprimanded him for doing so, but he really enjoyed the sound of Kyungsoo's melodious voice. He would always sing Brown Eyed Soul's 'My Story' and Jongin never got sick of it.

 

Little did Kyungsoo know, Jongin was recording Kyungsoo's voice on his phone when he finally softened his heart and gave in. He did as Jongin told him to.

2011/04/06

Jongin felt helpless. He spent almost a month wondering why it had to be him, why Kyungsoo had to fall for Chanyeol and why Chanyeol was even existent in Kyungsoo's life. Through that one month he vented his sadness and anger through dancing in the school's dance studio. He never wanted to stop. He thought that if he danced all day and tire himself out one day, he would die and would not have to suffer as much.

 

His phone rang. It was Kyungsoo's voice from when he sang for Jongin during Christmas the previous year. Jongin had became to obsessed with his voice that it became his ringtone.

 

"Hello?"

 

"Jongin where are you? It's getting late, why aren't you home yet?" A worried voice went through the phone.

 

"Give me a break, Kyungsoo. I'm only in school." Jongin was already on the verge of hanging up.

 

"Jongin... Please come back soon."

 

"Whatever." Jongin couldn't be bothered anymore. He hung up the phone and continued his dance routine.

 

Kyungsoo started to be concerned. He realised that the distance between the two of them was growing further and further.

 

If only Jongin knew how worried Kyungsoo was.

2011/05/29

Students received their mid-year results. As expected, being the smart child he was, Jongin aced all his subjects. 

 

"Congratulations kkamjong!" The familiar voice came about again. But this time, Jongin did not bother to take a look at him or guess who he was

 

"I knew you could do it!" Kyungsoo exclaimed as he gave Jongin a hug.

 

However Kyungsoo's hug was nothing to Jongin anymore. It had no value, it didn't make Jongin happy. It made him irritated.

 

"Get off." Jongin warned Kyungsoo as he glared at him.

 

Kyungsoo was in utter shock. He felt so afraid and small. This was the first time Jongin treated Kyungsoo in a cold manner. Jongin looked at his shiny brown eyes without expression. It was unusual. 

 

"Don't do that again." Jongin muttered. Kyungsoo couldn't believe what he heard. 

 

The close friendship that once contained meaning and happiness was starting to break apart. 

2010/01/12

Kyungsoo was freezing - It was the coldest month in Gyeongsang. Jongin had told him to meet at the playground near their house. Kyungsoo was starting to think that Jongin was trying to fool him, leaving him out in the cold for thirty minutes. He was started to feel angry.

 

"Are you okay? I'm sorry for being late" Jongin apologised sincerely as he hugged Kyungsoo from behind, giving him warmth. 

 

"What the hell? Where were you!" Kyungsoo questioned furiously. 

 

Although Kyungsoo was slightly mad at Jongin, he could help but smile at Kyungsoo for looking so adorable under his four layered outfit to prevent him from freezing to death in the winter season.

 

"I went to get you this! Happy birthday Kyungsoo!" Jongin looked down sheepishly, avoiding as much eye contact as he could from Kyungsoo, presenting a black friendship band in his hands.

 

"Wow, it's really pretty! Thank you, kkamjong!" Kyungsoo grabbed the friendship band with much ethusiasm and immediately put it on.

 

"I hope you'll always wear it. I have the same one as you do too. Look!" Jongin lifted his sleeves to show his friendship band to Kyungsoo. He wore his on his right hand and Kyungsoo wore his on his left hand. That way it would look nice when both of them stood together.

 

To Kyungsoo it may have just been an ordinary friendship band. But to Jongin, it meant much more.

2011/06/07

 

Kyungsoo and Chanyeol were having their regular study session in the classroom while Jongin practiced his dancing in the studio. Kyungsoo had grown to love that gigantic figure even more than before. After three months of being together, both had built a strong, unbreakable relationship.

 

"Kyungsoo..."

 

"Yes goblin?"

 

"I want you to put your hand on the table."

Kyungsoo hesistated for a while. He was afraid that Chanyeol would put a live bug in his hand since he was known for being playful and playing pranks. But eventually, he did as he was told. Kyungsoo wanted to find out what he had in mind. Chanyeol looked into Kyungsoo's eyes and gave a playful smile where most of his teeth showed. He slowly took out something small from his pocket that couldn't be seen as his big hands covered everything. He held Kyungsoo's small hand and placed the item in it.

 

It was a blue friendship band.

 

"Put it on!" Chanyeol looked at Kyungsoo with his wide smile. Blinded by love, Kyungsoo did as he was told and took off the friendship band Jongin gave him, replacing it with Chanyeol's. 

 

"Thank you Chanyeol, I really love it." Kyungsoo looked into his eyes and gave Chanyeol a little kiss on the cheek. He had remembered he needed to look for Jongin in the dance studio so he could make sure Jongin came home early. 

 

Kyungsoo took his small steps towards the dance studio. He felt a surge of happiness flow through his body. It must have been the new friendship band he received from his lover. He was more than elated. He knocked on the door to call Jongin out. 

 

"Hurry up it's getting late we have to go!" Kyungsoo squealed through the locked door. He wondered why Jongin took so long. But eventually, he came out. He looked lethargic, tired. As though all the energy and happiness within him had been drained away. Dark circles grew under his eyes. Kyungsoo thought that it was due to the huge amount of homework piling up due to the upcoming end year exams and neglected Jongin's condition. How could he have missed those signs?

 

Jongin looked down and noticed that the black friendship band he once gave Kyungsoo to treasure was replaced with a striking blue band that did not go very well with Kyungsoo. Disturbed, he went off without Kyungsoo.

 

In many ways, Kyungsoo was hurt and upset. He was confused. He did not know why Jongin was treating him in such a crude manner. 

2008/01/26

 

It was the last few days for Kyungsoo and Jongin to enjoy the coldest moments in Gyeongsang. Both of them enjoyed making snowmen together. After hours of hard work, they managed to build the most beautiful yet typical snowmen - carrot nose, olive buttons, a hat, a scarf and sticks for hands.

 

Pride engulfed Jongin's eyes. "What should we name him?"

 

"I don't know... I've been coming up with the name for the past few years and they're always weird. Why don't you choose it this time." Kyungsoo replied in utter disappointment.

 

"How about... Kaisoo?"

 

"Kaisoo? That sounds great! Kaisoo it shall be!"

 

Jongin had no idea why the name kaisoo came into his mind. He couldn't think of anything else but that. But if it satisfied Kyungsoo, it satisfied him as well. 

 

Those were the younger days of Kyungsoo and Jongin where they didn't have to experience pain or sadness.

 

2011/07/28

 

Kyungsoo came home one day to find himself in a unexpected situation. When he stepped into the house, the first thing he saw was Jongin with a luggage in his hand, ready to leave the house.

 

"Jongin ah, where are you going?"

 

Jongin looked at Kyungsoo quite mysteriously, as though he didn't know who he was or why he was there.

 

"Are you leaving me now?" Kyungsoo asked, with a shaky voice. He was scared. Jongin had been a close friend of Kyungsoo's for a long time and the fact that he would leave him made Kyungsoo feel unsettled.

 

"I bought myself an apartment in the city with my parents' inheritance. I'll study and live there on my own. I should do fine." Jongin replied silently. He looked at Kyungsoo, expressionless.  

 

"Jongin we are really close friends, please don't go." 

 

"Friends? You're kidding me." Jongin couldn't look into Kyungsoo's eyes. He was afraid the feeling he received when he fell for Kyungsoo. His eyes, his smile. Those were Jongin's weaknesses. All Kyungsoo could do was remain silent. He did notice the fact that Jongin and him were distancing from each other, that they rarely talked.

 

"You don't know what it feels like to watch the one you love fall for another person, do you?" Jongin questioned. To the innocent Kyungsoo, it seemed like a threat. But he remained silent. Tears were about to roll down Kyungsoo's squishy cheeks, but he tried his best to control them. 

 

"Goodbye Kyungsoo. I don't want to see you anymore." Jongin took his final breath and slammed the front door. He had much more to say to Kyungsoo, but he was on the verge of breaking down. He did not want to hurt the feelings of Kyungsoo either.

 

Kyungsoo wanted to stop Jongin. But he felt like he was choking, that his words were being held in the hands of a demon. A demon that did not want Kyungsoo to see Jongin anymore. Kyungsoo broke down into tears. 

 

Jongin and Kyungsoo were at their final stages of their friendship that once seemed eternal.

2006/01/01

 

Jongin and Kyungsoo never celebrated New Years' like any ordinry person. Instead of watching the fireworks, or watching TV, they would go to the playground near their house and relive their childhood memories and the time they spent together. It made both of them happy. They would laugh over the silly encounters either of them experienced. 

 

It was an anual tradition for Kyungsoo and Jongin. First of January - on the swings - looking back at their past.

 

2012/01/01

Kyungsoo had been trying to find Jongin. He tried calling Jongin's phone number but it never got through.

 

If only Kyungsoo knew that Jongin changed his number.

 

He tried looking for Jongin's house in the city and even visited the house he used to live in with his parents.

 

If only Kyungsoo knew his efforts weren't going to help him.

 

By then, Kyungsoo lost all his feelings that he possessed towards Chanyeol and finding Jongin was his number one priority. Thankfully Chanyeol could understand. Although it did take some time for him to get over it, they become good friends after that.

 

Kyungsoo spent that New Years' alone on the swing, recalling his past. But this time it was different. He was filled with regret. He couldn't laugh about his embarrassing past. He wanted to reminisce it with Jongin.

 

If only he knew it was too late.

2012/02/19

It was a day before Kyungsoo was going to move to Seoul to finally reach his lifetime goal. He packed everything he had in his house into boxes to be sent to his new address. Chanyeol came over to help him pack up as well as he knew Kyungsoo's frail body couldn't carry most of the heavy items he had. Whilst clearing his bookshelf, Chanyeol noticed a pile of letters at the side. It was rather dusty considering the fact that it was left untouched.

 

"Kyungsoo, do you want these letters? They seem important." Chanyeol questioned as he cautiously examined the surface of the letters. 

 

"Just put them in my harversack. I guess I could read them in the bus to Seoul." Kyungsoo was busy packing up his things that he did not bother to look at the stack of letters Chanyeol was referring to. 

 

He should have looked.

2012/02/20

"It's okay, I understand that he won't be coming." Kyungsoo replied with disappointment towering over him like the grey clouds during the monsoon season. 

 

"Let's go, or you'll miss your bus." Chanyeol grabbed his luggage, saving the frail soul from more misery. 

 

"What if I find Jongin there..." Kyungsoo whispered under his breath.

 

"Did you say something?" Chanyeol stared at Kyungsoo, muddled. It must be diffcult for Chanyeol to hear Kyungsoo's voice whenever he whispered.

 

Kyungsoo gave Chanyeol a small smile of reassurance, "It's nothing."  He wanted to tell Chanyeol how he felt, but he couldn't express it in words. He was upset. He missed Jongin and his presence. 

 

Was it really Jongin's fault that he left?

 

Kyungsoo finally boarded the bus that would bring him to the largest city in Korea. He turned back and looked at Chanyeol to give him a final goodbye.

 

Chanyeol looked at  Kyungsoo with mixed feelings, "Don't say goodbye yet, it's not the end. I'm sure we'll meet again someday." Chanyeol knew he would miss Kyungsoo.

 

"Thank you for everything, Chanyeol."

 

2007/12/12

It was the school break for all the students. Jongin and Kyungsoo decided to go on a secret gateway to the outskirts of Gyeongsang. They always wanted to see what lied behind the