Ryeowook had always loved giraffes. Their tall graceful necks, their cute curious faces, the way they stayed together like a family.

He loved Heechul too.

 

Heechul wasn't always the most supportive boyfriend, wasn't always the one to notice when Wook was upset, or to help him when he was tired. He wasn't hurtful, he wasn't trying to make Ryeowook feel alone. It was just Heechul. It was just his personality.

 

Sometimes the younger boy would sit for hours, watching a giraffe documentary, only for Heechul to arrive and turn it off, taking Wook to a bar or a club. At first, the younger boy had agreed, and gone happily to spend time with his boyfriend.

But lately, he had just asked to stay home together.

 

Heechul thought it was for him, but it was actually so that Ryeowook could watch the giraffes, so that he could feel the love they shared. The giraffes were always there, he just had to press a button to see the show, to feel happy. Heechul was harder to work with.

 

He got angry easily, and would take his anger out on objects, smashing them to the floor, and ruining them. When he had calmed down, he would repair the objects, but they were never the same as before. They kept the marks of the abuse, the dents of pain.

 

Once, Heechul had ripped Kiki in anger.

 

Ryeowook could remember the pain he had felt, as though Heechul had ripped his head off, instead of the plush giraffe's. Like being stabbed through the heart.

Heechul had apologised after, once he had calmed down, but it did nothing to stop Wook's tears. The younger boy just sobbed endlessly in Leeteuk's arms.

 

Heechul had offered to fix the giraffe, or to buy a new one, but Ryeowook shook his head, holding the giraffe tenderly in his arms like a newborn baby. Heechul would never touch the soft plush again.

 

Wook sat with Sungmin, wiping his eyes as he watched the gentle boy mend the giraffe, holding it tenderly, its head hanging by a thread.

Like his relationship with Heechul.

 

As Sungmin began to sew the giraffe, he spoke gently with Wook, knowing that the younger boy treasured the soft toy.

He talked to him in a soothing voice, before giving Kiki a hug, and handing her to Ryeowook.

 

Ryeowook just sat in Sungmin's room for a while, talking with the older boy. They lay under the blankets, whilst Wook explained about the problems in their relationship, and the comfort he received from giraffes.

 

He didn't have to worry about offending them, he didn't have to worry about them getting drunk and cheating. They were always there to make him smile, to make him feel happy again.

 

One day, Heechul was more angry than usual, and he came back from his walk making out with another man. Too drunk to remember that he had a boyfriend, he walked through the living room where Wook was sitting with Sungmin.

The members had wanted to shout, wanted to defend Ryeowook. But the boy didn't care.

Pressing 'play' he found his comfort again. He didn't need Heechul.

 

When the boy woke up with a hangover, ashamed of finding another man in his bed, he went to find Wook. But the boy was in bed with Sungmin, the two of them curled up in bed together, the blankets covering them as they slept.

 

They had both been intimate last night, but Heechul could clearly see the differences between them.

Heechul had had last night, drunk that was already half forgotten. He had given himself to a complete stranger.

Ryeowook had been intimate with Sungmin, but in a soft comforting way, like brothers. Heechul could see by their faces that they had spent the night cuddling and whispering together.

 

Even if he hadn't cheated, their relationship would never have worked. They were too different. Sitting at the side of the bed, watching his ex-boyfriend as he slept, he wept for what he had lost, what he had missed out on.

 

As Wook shuffled a little in sleep, Heechul could see the giraffe plushie against his chest, and the way that the boy supported its head, even in sleep.

He had never understood about the giraffes, never understood why the younger boy would always hug them and watch them on television. But now he did.

 

He had always thought that it was just weird, a stupid obsession, but now he could clearly see why Ryeowook would always watch them. They were his comfort, he clung to them like a small child. Like a victim of a trauma, Wook had found something to make him feel complete, to make him feel happy. Something that loved him back.

 

Ryeowook was so delicate, so innocent, Heechul had always thought that he would be Ryeowook's defender, he would be the one to make him feel safe, to comfort him. It was only now that he realised he was the one who hurt Wook the most. By trying to stop the obsession, he had lost Ryeowook's trust, and broken his heart. He was a cheater, he was hurtful, and, without meaning to, he had been abusive.

 

Watching the way Sungmin held Ryeowook, he knew that they cared for each other. The boy was soft and caring, his voice gentle. Sungmin would be perfect for Ryeowook, and they would care for each other. Although they were just friends, Heechul would help them to be together. It was the least he could do.

Taking a small piece of paper, he began to write a small note.

 

When Ryeowook woke up, he felt the paper in his hand, and opened it to see a small picture of a giraffe, and two words. I'm sorry.

 

Knowing that it was Heechul, Wook got out of bed and went to find the older boy. To forgive him.

But Heechul didn't want to be forgiven. He wouldn't accept it. Hugging Ryeowook tenderly, he gave him the love and comfort that he should have given the boy all this time. So that he wouldn't have to seek comfort in objects.

Reaching behind his back, he handed Ryeowook a soft plush giraffe, a symbol of acceptance. Seeing the boy's warm smile, he felt like crying. The boy was perfect, with his sweet personality and the way he cared for others. It was heartbreaking to watch him hug the soft plush, and to know that he would never look at Heechul with such undying love.

 

Pulling the older boy by the hand, Ryeowook led him to the sofa, and sat under a blanket with him. Ryeowook reached over to press play, and for once Heechul didn't complain, even though he knew it would be a documentary. He just sat with Ryeowook, hugging him close.

 

Feeling the smaller boy relax in his arms, Heechul knew that he was forgiven. He had won over Wook's trust, and gained entrance to his world. The private world that no one else shared. Where he could be safe.

Heechul hugged Wook tightly. Although they were no longer together, he would always care for Ryeowook. He would learn from his mistakes, and make the boy feel safe and happy enough to date again, to love again.

 

Ryeowook had created his own world, where there was no pain, and he could retreat from the world. He could just be there with the giraffes, and forget about the neglect from his boyfriend.

Heechul smiled, and gave Wook a hug, leaning down to press a kiss to the giraffe's head, and watching the boy glow with happiness.

Sitting like a family, Heechul saw the boy truly smile for the first time in ages.