Shiro.  That baka, forever going on about tomodachi and unmei.  Ever on the edge of my wings, which try to brush him away.  And sometimes i think it would alright, to let myself become closer to him, to become a clan of just the two of us.  Sometimes i consider it, other times i brush it off as in a feeling of contempt for allowing myself that brief moment of weakness.  but i think it may not be too bad.  

 

But i so dearly wished to become shiroi.  and i told Yagamo (that old pestering ghost) that my wish is to become shiroi, and another time i have told him i wish to rule the world, and yet another time i have wished for another thing that would be equally meaningless.  I have realized how much Shiro has been opening me to the world, even as reluctant as i am.  

 

i have only known false serenity from the other tenshi Hosts, and my own anger, and bitterness, and hatred, and loneliness.  I can name annoyance, and irritation, and contempt.  i can look at them all and name each one.  But i have never felt such a protection to something so vulnerable, so open to the rest of the world.  i have to protect Shiro.  Even though i scoff at his theory of unmei, i cannot help but feel that it was a forbidden fate for us to have met.  We are both outsiders in our own worlds.  How is it that we both managed to escape the authority of those who are higher than us?  and how we met, that could not have been an accident either.

 

He is the taisetsunai thing my life, and meeting him, i think, has changed my world forever.  and i cannot help but feel a darkness at the end of the path that we walk.  Almost losing Shiro made me see the light inside my body, shining in such a place that is riddled in darkness and sin.  and that darkness lurks out of sight, tangible, but there.  i do not know if Shiro can sense it as i can; his light eclipses the tiny core of himself that is shrouded in darkness.  i know that amongst his goodness is an evil that will turn him to do anything to protect me.  

 

He already incited the tenshi's wrath when he knifed one of them to save me from going back to the Heaven that is likened to Hell for me.  I would normally recoil from all the physical attention he gives me, but holding him, praying he would be brought back, it gave me some sort of comfort.  the only other touches i have known are strikes to my wings as i have been held down, hit by such creatures who call themselves the Keepers of Heaven, asking how i was born into their perfect world, the only imperfection in such a place of beauty. And so i have to protect Shiro.  

 

he already has the key to my world.  he has opened it.  he can no longer close it, for i am becoming open to everything around me, and him.  my key is now something that he holds metaphysically, and he has entered my world, and become part of my unmei.  i cannot let anything happen to him... ..

 

  ~Kuro