Jessa's P.O.V:

I sat where I normally did, at the table I once did when Soo Ji would come with me, afterwards I opened my laptop to where I left it, on the KAT website. KAT.com is a social media website, like facebook, youtube, instagram, etc., but unlike other websites, this was made just for Kpoppers. KAT stands for Kpop Addicts Together. It has: a blog, a forum, many chat rooms, individual chat rooms, video chat, music videos, vlogs, and dramas, all in one site. Soo Ji introduced me to KAT.com and I became, eh, a bit addicted to blogging. I've posted every single day since eleventh grade. It was kind of like a diary. One good thing about blogging everyday for five years, is that I can look back at a better time, when Soo Ji was alive. I occasionally reread some of my blogs. Like this first one, which was quite awkward:



9 January 2008

HELLO EVERYONE OF KAT.COM!!!<3 My name is Jessa! I have long brown hair, blue eyes, and VERY VERY PALE! My BESTEST FRIEND IN THE WORLD is Choi Soo Ji. She is my EVERYTHING!!! I love to edit videos!~ That is was I plan to do after highschool! I would like to become a music video producer for YG Ent. so I can be with my Oppa!!! T.O.P!! Hehe~ ;D I am very shy at times! But! When you get to know me... I. AM. CRRRAAAAYYSSAAAYYYY! LLOOOOOOOOLLL~ My favorite group is BIGBANG, and my bias is T.O.P!!! WOW THIS IS WEIRD TALKING TO A COMPUTER!!!!~ Well treat me well KAT.COM! I will post more tomorrow

LAAAATTTAASSSSS!!!!!<3

KawaiiRamyun



I began to tear up and smile as I read all my posts about how much fun Soo Ji and I had. Before I knew it I felt those tears running down my face, then I quickly wiped them away, making sure no one seen. I probably look like some loner here at this table every single day, looking like I'm going to cry my eyes out in the middle of having coffee, but, I got to admit, now that Soo Ji is gone, I am a loner. I haven't had time to make new friends, away from working on my colleges news broadcast station. I'm either editing something, making a script for our next story, or interviewing people. It was difficult. I was alone. With nothing but memories of my best friend. Why did she have to leave so soon? It didn't make sense! Why her? Why so young? Was this a sick joke?

I calmed myself down and took a few deep breaths then went to my last post to look at the comments. All of them were telling me how I was going to be okay, and that I will move on surely. I didn't feel like I was going to move on any time soon. If I were to move on now, it would be if I was hit by a car, or even dieing of leukemia. But odds are that I'm not going to die any time soon. So I just sit and suffer this lonely silence. I felt the tears running down my face again. God, two days in a row, and I haven't been able to write another post. I better do that now before I have a puddle of tears under my chair.



10 September 2013

Hello, my dears. I haven't been doing too well. I feel so lonely. I feel like... like I'll always be lonely, with no friends to talk to when you're sad, or to laugh with when you're happy. It makes me almost cry every time I walk into this coffee shop. Should I choose a new one? I don't know. I dont think that I can leave even if I wanted to. There is too many memories that I do not want to forget... You're comments on my last post were all so sweet and brightened my day. I wish that I could just reach through the screen and hug you all. But sadly, technology hasn;t advanced enough for me to do so. Thank you all for your support! I really do need it! Well, I'm going to close this post with a BBBIIIIGGGG HUG! Okay? 1, 2, 3, HUUUUUG! Haha! Thankyou, goodbye.

Love,

KawaiiRamyun



After posting, I went to the LC9 chat room. Sense LC9 is so new, there wasn't many people within it. LC9 debuted in May, just a month after Soo Ji's death. They were her favorite group at the moment. Her favorite was E. Den, but in my opinion, King was better. I talked to a few people about their debut coming up in October, and also people that shared my same bias. After having a few conversations I drank the rest of my coffee and walked back to Weston College, which is where I go to school. After walking towards the door I accidentally ran into a man with a long black pea coat, a black scarf, big black shades, with a black beanie that let hiss blond hair poke out from underneath it. I looked up at him and then apologized and he nodded.

Walking out gave me cold chills down my body. It was starting to get a bit colder for winter was beckoning its long cold fingers towards fall. I pulled my light blue jacket closed over my skinny body. Sigh, I need to gain weight. Walking on the sidewalk that lead to my college's dormitory, I tripped over a crack and fell, ripping the knee of my jeans. I looked around and I seen people staring at me like I was some kind of freakshow, not reaching out a helpful hand out to me. I then stood up and wiped the dirt from my clothing. I started towards the dormitory once more tightening my scarf, which cute hearts all over it, around my neck. I finally reached my room after a lot of walking. I was so warm. I walked into my room and flopped on my bed and looked up to my ceiling with a T.O.P poster that Soo Ji gave me and began to cry. Surely later, I cried myself to sleep.

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E.Den's P.O.V:

     I sat at the table in the small little coffee shop, and while looking around I noticed that the crying girl wasn't there today, poor girl. I looked down to my bag on the ground and bent down, reaching for it, then I pulled my small netbook from it. I set it on my table, then I pulled my big black shades from my eyes. I was in disguise because I didn't want to risk of being seen in Vancouver. That would take me away from what I came to do, and that is to take care of my sick mother. My mother has a high fever from stress due to my sisters successful suicide attempt. I felt so bad for my mother that I came to take care of her till she was stable on her own feet; I'm here for six months, because I just finished LC9's comeback recording, so they gave me a break to be here.

     When my mother is sleeping I walk a very far distance to a coffee shop that me and my sister would walk to. I smiled every time I came here, thinking of her cute little smile when I used to make funny faces while sipping on my coffee. I would sit in the same spot we used to, and talk to King over Skype. Speaking of Skyping with King, I think I should drop him a line. I opened the lid to my small netbook and watched as my desktop would light up with a picture of King, Jun, Rasa, Ao, J-Hyo, and I dancing on our debut stage. I smiled as I pulled up Skype and see that King has already messaged me a few hundred times. I let out a small chuckle then look around the quite coffee shop a bit startled to see if any one noticed, no one did, but to be safe I pulled my scarf a little closer to my face. I looked back down to my netbook and replied to his few hundred messages.

     "Did you miss me, idiot? :p''

     It didn't take long before I seen that little pencil scribble across the screen, indicating that he was typing and replying.

     "E. DEN! OMO, I'VE MISSED YOU SO MUCH. HOW COME YOU HAVEN'T REPLIED TO ME, STUPID HEAD!?!?! :'("

     "I forgot, stop being so clingy, you're like a clingy girlfriend ;)"

     "Stop being so mean. :( I was just worried."

     "Okay, okay. So guess what? I found this website for people that like kpop, and our faces are plastered all over it!"

     "OMO! What is it called?"

      "Kat.com... or something like that"

     "SO COOOLLL~! Well I got to go, stupid head! BYEBYE~!"

     I said good bye and shook my head, that was a quick conversation. I logged onto that website and looked at a lot of the fan art, then I noticed something... WHY AM I KISSING KING!?!?!?! WHY!?! THESE GIRLS WERE SICK IN THE HEAD!!!!!!! I sighed then clicked on the chat room tab. I seen that there were a lot of groups on there, like: Super Junior, SHINee, BIGBANG, Girls Generation, and my Noonas, Brown Eyed Girls. I scrolled down more then I seen there was a chat room made for LC9! YES! Let's see, should I go in and ask about myself? YES, I SHALL!

     I went into the chat and automatically seen that girls were wooing over me. I felt my face burning pink slightly, seeing they were seeing how cute I was. Then, there was a girl name RaRaBear that privately messaged me saying, "HAI THURR! I'M LILLY! I SEEN THAT YOUR BIAS WAS E. DEN! MY FRIEND'S BIAS IS HIM TOO!"

     I tapped my chin thinking of what to say, try to act girly, act girly.

     "HAHA! Yea, he's soooo perfect, and he has like, the best voice ever, like, totally!"

     Oops, went a little over board.

     "Haha! Well nice talking to you!! I have to leave!! Will you be back tomorrow! I want to talk more!!"

     Should I come back?

     "Yeah!! I will, totally, be here, like, yeah!!! BYEBYE!~"

     RaRaBear signed off then I looked at the screen and seen that this rooms founder was a girl named: KawaiiRamyun.... Huh, well that's interesting! I signed off and put back on my big shades then smushed my netbook back into my bag and walked back to the bus stop. the air was very cold, colder than Korea's. I pulled my big black jacket closer to my body, hoping that it would warm me up just a bit. Standing at the bus stop was the worst part. I began to march in place to keep me warm, and surely worked. As soon as I became warm enough to stop marching the bus stopped suddenly in front of the people at the stop and I. I stepped onto the first step and nearly fell, but I quickly caught myself. I must look like an idiot.

     The bus ride was very long, and I had to stand so my legs were getting a bit soar. Canada didn't have as good of public transportation as Korea had, but this will do. When I finally reached my stop I jumped from the bottom step and quickly ran to my house that was a few blocks away. I was ready to see if my mother needed dinner. I love taking care of my mother, she is just so sweet. She never deserved to have such a broken family and it hurt me to see her in pain.

     I finally reached our old, rundown house. My family was fairly poor, but I was grateful for what they had. I send them money every once in a while to help my mother and father with food and bills. I always hoped that they were doing okay, it was stressful to always worry for their health and to train and go to events and what not. When I stepped into the house it was just a tiny bit warmer than what it was outside. No wonder Mom was sick! There is absolutely no heat in this place. I ran through the narrow hallway to my mother's room at the end. When I stood in the door way she was sitting up watching her television. She looked over to me and smiled brightly, like she wasn't in pain, I smiled back and asked if she needed anything. She shook her head ant told me to just go to my room and rest, so I did. I didn't want to argue with her and put her through more pain. I sat on my bed and got under the covers. It was so cold that I felt the hair on my legs stand to the tip. I opened my netbook and began writing down, under a word document, my findings in the human behavior.






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That was our first chapter guys!!!!!!! We are soo excited! The poster and back ground was made by this GREAT little team called: Kaisoo Request Shop! IT'S PERFECT! That is where we're going to go for our next story!! Well! I hope those who read this will enjoy it!