The next day when I woke up, my throat was on fire.

Maybe it would have been a good idea to actually drink the water Yixing had given me, but I had such a massive headache last night that I just wanted to go to sleep. Not that the headache actually went away or anything. It still felt like I had been hit with a hammer upside the head, and no matter how much aspirin I took in the morning the feeling would not go away. The stiffness that effected my entire neck, shoulders, and back didn’t help any either. Really, it would have been an understatement to say that my day was off to a bad start.

It was flat out the worst I have probably ever had.

I was shaken awake by Tao, who looked a little wary to actually disturb me, but did nonetheless, seeing as I was the last to get up despite the others crashing around getting ready to go to our schedule. He gave me a soft smile and told me it was time to get up. I just gave him a nod in return, thinking he would go and get changed or something, but he just stared at me, concern filling his eyes.

“Do you need any help Lu ge?” he asks quickly. “Are you feeling dizzy or anything?”

Shaking my head, I smile falsely at him, trying to conceal how crappy I actually felt. Sadly, when I tried to tell him I was fine my voice automatically gave me away.

“I’m fine, Tao.” I croak out before quickly slapping a hand over my mouth, shocked by the odd sound I had made.

“Manager Hyun!” Tao yells over his shoulder, ignoring the hard slap I give his arm.

I can hear our manager shuffling down the hallway to the living room. When he rounds the corner, a look of worry covers his face and he comes to the couch in an instant.

“What is it?” he questions the both of us.

As an answer, Tao points to me and somehow the elder man understands perfectly. He pushes past the panda and begins to ask me questions left and right, not once giving me the opportunity to actually respond. Finally he takes a breath. By this time the others had come into the room and were surrounding the sofa in confusion, all giving me an odd look. Seizing the moment, I clear my throat, which proves more painful that thought to be, and try to answer all of his questions.

“I’m okay, really!”

Well that failed. I couldn’t even get out the simple three words without my voice cracking terribly. Manager Hyun sighs in frustration and his shoulders drop. I frown in self-loathing and curse myself for catching a cold. Reaching out, the man places a hand on my forehead and sighs again.

“You’re a little warm,” he says while looking at the other members. “You can’t talk which means you can’t very well sing for the radio show either. We’re going to have to give your part to Yixing, do you know it?”

Staring at Lay, Manager quickly hurries to fix the problem I had inadvertently created, and a minute later everyone was back off getting ready to go. Returning after a minute, Lay walks up to me with an assortment of pills and hands them to me, along with my unopened water bottle from last time.

I take the medicine, a little begrudgingly, and stand up slowly. Most likely from the loud gasp I made, or the way I held myself while leaning on the arm of the couch, Yixing quickly helped me to stand. He didn’t ask any questions, which I liked right now, and he somehow just knew what I was thinking. The unicorn walked with me to the bathroom, not making it obvious when Chen walked past us, and I waved him off at the unanswered question his eyes sent to me. I really didn’t need to ask for help in the bathroom, especially not with taking a shower, even if Tao was big on “conserving water”, my pride wouldn’t allow me to let Yixing past the doorframe.

“I’ll get some clothes for you,” he suggests as he watches me rub my shoulders slowly. “They will be on the counter.”

I just nod in response and close the door before jumping in the shower and letting the scalding water hit my sore muscles. Why did I decide to sleep on that dumb couch? Oh yeah, because of Minseok.

At the thought of the angry Baozi, I flinch in thought of what the day had in store for me, and I think I should have prayed or something for luck. It was just one of those days, I guess.

Since I had taken quite some time in the shower, everyone had ordered food from the same restaurant we had gotten from last night so that we could just pick it up and eat on the way. They all seemed fine with the idea, which was Chen’s suggestion even if I think Minseok had something to do with it, and we piled into the van silently.

Yixing sat beside me in what seemed to be our new seating arrangement and was singing softly to himself while he listened to his mp3 player, trying to remember the lyrics to the song he now had to sing. To this I had apologized multiple times for being a burden, but he just sent me a comforting smile. I knew he didn’t care, but I still felt really bad for just dumping my problem on him.

I wouldn’t get out when we got to the restaurant. I could see through the windows that the creeper guy was at the counter, and he looked a little too happy. When Lay asked if I was coming, I shook my head lightly before turning to my window and resting against the cold glass. I hadn’t noticed that both Jongdae and Minseok were staying as well. Well, they were until they noticed I was going to be there still. Once they realized that, the two Koreans jumped out and stood right outside the van.

Truthfully, that stung. It’s not like they were going to die or anything if they sat inside alone with me. But from past experience, I knew that when Minseok was angry over something he usually ended up exaggerated everything a little. At this point I didn’t really care anymore. My headache was so bad and I couldn’t find a comfortable position in my seat that didn’t aggravate my aching muscles that I was past the point of caring. Sitting there just made me realize this more and all I could do was sigh in distress.

As I chanced a look out the van and into the shop I saw the others coming out with the food. My stomach growled in want and I realized that I hadn’t eaten a real meal for nearly two days. I sat up a little as the car doors opened, watching Lay and the bag he carried make their way to the backseat, I hurriedly grab for the food.

Carefully taking the top box I hand it to Yixing and look curiously at my own. Popping open the top, the sweet aroma fills my senses. I quickly take a bite and spill a little on my  hand in my hurry. I grab at a napkin that had somehow stuck to the bottom of box, but when it doesn’t move as easily as I thought it would, I rip it off in a hurry. My heart drops and the food falls from my mouth and back into the rest of the sweet smelling food.

You didn’t come in? I really wanted to see you, my little Luhannie! I’m actually really hurt, did you not want to see me or something? Are you ashamed of what we have together? Don’t worry, the other members won’t find out.
XOXO Soul Mate

I look to Yixing, but he doesn’t seem to notice anything different while he eats peacefully. Neither do the others, thankfully, and I slowly close me food and place it back in the bag it had come from. Only then does Lay look at me, but I hoarsely whisper out that I wasn’t hungry and he easily nods his head in understanding.

We get to the radio set a little later, everyone sighing contently at the feeling of their full stomachs, and they all throw their trash away in an outside trash bin. Sneakily I follow behind them and toss mine as well, but I get caught by Minseok, as he sends me a stern glare. I thought I would get off without being yelled at, but after the radio show it seemed that I wasn’t as lucky as I had believed.

It happened when I was eating a candy bar, the first real food I was eating and digesting properly, since I didn’t really count last night’s sandwich fiasco. We had just finished the show and were heading back to the van to go back to the dorms when I had stopped at a vending machine, intent on getting something. I thought that I was behind everybody else, but when a hand grabbed my shoulder just as I was putting the chocolate into my mouth, I knew I had been caught red-handed. What I didn’t expect was the person to actually yell at me.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Minseok asks furiously as he grabs the other half of my candy bar.

Trying to pull away, my lack of arm strength again prevails, and I can’t move from his grip. I frown and stare at the bar in frustration. My stomach was about to growl, I could feel the impending noise and it infuriated me even more that my one and only food source was now being held hostage by my angry boyfriend.

“I’m eating,” I reply as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, which to me, it was. Before Minseok could stop me, I reach with my other hand and grab the candy, stuffing it into my mouth at the speed of light. He looks shocked by the quickness of my action, but soon after his expression turns hard once again. Feeling desperate and tired, I begin to beg mercilessly to the elder.

“Please don’t be mad, I’m so hungry. Don’t tell the others, please.”

It must have looked as though I was about to cry because he seemed rather taken aback. He doesn’t reply and instead releases my hand. Sighing, he walks past me without saying anything. For some reason that makes me even more scared because I was sure that I was going to be chewed out. Turns out he was just saving the lecture for later.

Reaching the dorms I honestly couldn’t be more happy. I wanted to sleep, I wanted to be a pig, and I wanted to be lazy. I still felt like crap and I was pretty sure that the medicine Lay had given me did nothing. It was already late and, thankfully, my stomach wasn’t the only one that was growling angrily, everyone else seemed to be as famished as me. Well, maybe not as much as me, seeing as I had still only eaten a candy bar, but they were hungry. We were heading to the elevator when our manager stopped us.

“I’m going to go and get some food for us all,” he says. “I’ll be back in half an hour. You had all better sort your differences out by the time I get here.”

I knew he was referring to Minseok and I, and we all just nod in understanding. The ride up to our floor was awkward because no one spoke or even looked at each other. Tao coughed to try and break the silence, but it made everything more stiff since we were made painfully aware of what we were doing.

Entering our dorm, I kicked off my shoes and placed them nicely in their correct spot, only to stall, and slowly walked to the living room. In here it seemed even worse than the elevator. I sat next to Kris, knowing he would be the mediator of whatever would unravel.

When Yifan’s stomach grumbled in want, the leader subtly made a comment about being hungry, trying to lighten the mood, and as everyone else agreed, I mumbled yes to join in, but what a mistake that seemed to be. Immediately Minseok stood up from his spot diagonal to me and glared.

“You know Luhan,” he starts with a fake laugh, “that’s funny because you wouldn’t be so hungry if you had eaten the food that Kris bought you this morning.”

I lower my gaze from the fuming man, instead fixing my gaze on the coffee table. I could hear Lay trying to defend me, saying that I wasn’t feeling well and wasn’t hungry then, but the eldest wouldn’t accept that answer.

“Why not?” Minseok asks mockingly. “It’s made by his favorite person, isn’t it?”

My head whips up, causing me to wince as something in my neck pops. I stare at him in disbelief and my mouth drops open. I quickly fumble through the thoughts in my mind before coming to a realization. It all seemed to connect and I feel blind not to have seen it before.

The video was of the guy in the restaurant. I figured that out this morning, but I was too busy hanging over the garbage can to realize the importance of it. Xiumin was going to that place just to get me to interact with that creep. He knew since the very first time we went there who that guy was, and in retrospect I should have noticed the looks he gave me were more than just of anger. They were jealously. Betrayal. Distrust.

“What are you talking about?” Tao asks curiously, he and Kris being the only ones out of the loop. “Who is Luhan’s favorite person?”

“Some guy at the noodle place we went to,” Chen explains as quietly as possible.

Standing up, I take a step towards Minseok. “How is he suddenly my favorite? I don’t even know the guy!”

“You tell me!” he responds agitatedly. “How did know so much about you without ‘knowing’ you? He said he loved you and even promised you some tempting things, it was kind of obvious why you wanted to go with us yesterday when I specifically asked Kris to come.”

Rolling my eyes, I wave my hands in the wildly. “Who doesn’t know things about me? People all over the world know about my past, did you even stop to think he was just a crazed fan, or someone I used to go to school with?”

“Didn’t think you had such a big head, Luhan.” Minseok says with a snort. “So he’s a lover from the past? Sure seemed like that from the video. You two should go live happily ever after then.”

“Where does this even come from?” I yell loudly, startling them all. “What video is this and why do you believe some piece of plastic over me?”

“It was pretty convincing,” he replies as he grabs his backpack. He pulls out a small disk, which I assume is the source of all my trouble, and he throws it on the table. “There, go ahead and watch it. Shop is still open so I think you could still get in a late night snack, if you know what I mean.”

My eyes widen in shock at his words and I finally get the impression that the world is crumbling down. I could feel my stomach churning in repulsion, and I look away from Minseok as I try to contain myself. At some point Kris had stood up in an attempt to stop us from getting too loud, which failed, and he just now makes us sit back in our original seats.

There was a long pause where no one dared to speak before Minseok shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He rubbed his face with a tired hand and breathed a heavy sigh. Every one of us stare at the disk that remains untouched.

“Maybe we shouldn’t have formed a relationship inside the band,” he mumbles. “I see what Joonmyeon and Kris were talking about now. I guess I was just too blinded back then by the thought that you would always be mine.”

My heart stopped at the words and I looks desperately at the elder man. He couldn’t mean what I think he did, could he?

“Have the video, it’s your rightful property anyways.”

“Minseok, wait a second.”

I stand up to approach him, but he raises a shaky hand to stop me. I feel helpless as I stand in the middle of the living room, like a fish out of water. I knew everyone was staring at me and I hated it. Why couldn’t he listen to me instead of some stupid video?

“Please, don’t come near me.”

I’m pretty sure I was as pale as a ghost, and I could faintly hear my new ex asking for a different rooming arrangement as soon as possible. I think Kris was trying to reason with us to think this through and talk a little more, but I knew right now Minseok didn’t want to hear anything I had to say.

I didn’t move, just stared at the wall across the room. Not even when the bun passed by me and lightly slammed the bedroom door. I couldn’t answer the questions flying at me because of the large lump in the back of my throat. Because of me yelling, I felt even worse, and my neck really wasn’t feeling that swell either from whatever I had pulled.

My gaze drops slowly and lands on the DVD disk that was lying on the table. Something inside of me clicked and I felt a raging fire begin to burn in my heart. This was the reason I was fighting with the love of my life? I wanted it gone, to disappear forever.

In a haze, I lean forward and grab the stupid thing and make my way from the room ignoring the calls of my name as they try to stop me from doing something rash. I enter the kitchen, opening and slamming every drawer there is. I could feel the other members’ presence behind me.

“Do we not own any scissors?” I ask furiously shutting the last cupboard with more force than needed.

Yixing steps forward and tries to grab my hand to make me calm down, but for some reason the action just makes me angrier. Brushing him off, I take out the disk and bend it in my hands. I hear shouts for me to calm down and to stop, but I ignore them all. They didn’t know what it felt like to have their lives crushed by a little lie. A second later the disk shatters into pieces. A loud gasp from Lay breaks me from my celebration and he gingerly grabs my wrist.

“Luhan, your hand!”

I look down at it and notice a stream of blood coming from a not so little cut in my palm. The adrenaline of the moment was slowly wearing off and I could feel the pain radiate throughout my arm. Not thinking about it, I pull out a piece of plastic that was lodged in my skin and grab the towel on the counter to wrap it around my wound.

Lay orders Tao and Chen to go and get the first aid kit that I’m pretty sure didn’t exist, seeing as how we didn’t even have scissors, and as soon as they’re gone I hear the front door open. Manager Hyun walks into the kitchen with our food and he stares between the three of the remaining members in confusion.

When he was about to ask something to Kris, the man looked over to me and saw that my hand was wrapped in a bloody makeshift bandage. He rushes over and takes my arm from Yixing, yelling out questions as he gently pulls back the cloth to see how bad the cut was. Looking at the ground, which was littered with broken plastic and even some drops of blood, he glances between the two with a worried expression. I remain unfazed by it all until I glance past our manager and notice the bag that our food was in.

It was the same bag from this morning, and last night. It was from that guy’s shop. My façade breaks and I finally digest what had happened. Minseok was no longer mine. He hated me. He was disgusted by me. And it was all this random guy’s fault. I could feel myself suffocating and I push past Manager Hyun and stumble towards the door. I push it open quickly and run out, carrying my shoes in one hand while the other remains cradled next to my chest. I heard my name being called, but I ignored it as I ran. I had to get out. I had to leave. My world really was crashing down and I had to get somewhere safe, somewhere I could just let everything out and not care anymore.

My heart was beating fast, and I could feel tears welling in my eyes. Unable to stop them, they fall down my face and I’m sure I looked like a mess, at least I felt like one. I was sore and tired, but I didn’t let it stop me. I continued walking the cold evening streets with no idea of where I would stop.

Hope you all had a great holiday season. Here is chapter three, enjoy!