I. Mr. Perfect

I’ve always wondered what it would be like to feel like I belong. Like I was actually someone. That I wasn’t less than nothing.

The doctor smiled, writing down Dongjin’s results of his physical,”It’s great that you’re still playing baseball, considering that you’re taking on all of these other activities as well.”

Dongjin grinned,”I wouldn’t give it up for anything in the world.”

Mrs. Shin shook her head with a motherly smile upon her face,”Of course. Doctor, I told him that he should take it easy considering that he’s taking dance and vocal lessons, but he just won’t listen to me!”

The doctor laughed whole heartedly,”Wow, dancing and singing too? I bet that you have the perfect, ideal life, Dongjin!”

Dongjin’s smile faltered, yet he tried not to show it. My life isn’t anywhere near perfect; it’s not even close to average.

But after this man that I’m supposed to consider family came into my life, a day hasn’t gone by where I could happily feel that way.

There was a knock on Dongjin’s door, and he curiously looked over,”Yes?”

Mrs. Shin poked her head in,”Dinner’s ready, darling!”

Dongjin nodded, saving his essay paper before closing the window. He got up and stretched his arms, the hoodie going up slightly,”I’ll be right down.”

His mother left and he scratched his head before exiting the room, closing the door behind him. He looked up from his feet and stared at the man standing on the opposite side of the hallway. He glared at the boy, making him freeze in place.

“What are you looking at?” He snapped at Dongjin, snapping Dongjin out of his state of fear.

“Nothing. I’m sorry,” Dongjin apologized, looked back down at his feet.

The man shook his head, look around before hitting Dongjin on the back of his head,”You worthless piece of trash. I don’t understand why people say that you’re so popular at school. You’re nothing. You’re less than dirt.”

Dongjin continued staring down at his feet, not replying. He was used to this; he was used to being put down and beaten before and after dinner by a man he was supposed to be calling stepfather. But even the man himself refused to allow Dongjin to call him that, for he said that he “wasn’t worthy of even being in his sight, nevertheless call him stepfather.” But he didn’t care.

Even if this man beats me everyday, even if I feel like there’s no point in living everyday...

The rain hitting the window distracted Dongjin from paying attention to the lesson. The teacher called on him to answer the question on the board, but no matter how hard the people around him tried to wake him from his daze; it wasn’t possible. Dongjin zoned out completely, not even noticing when Chan had shook his shoulder hard. The younger continued to stare out into the rain and the teacher decided it was a waste of time to try to get his favored student to answer the question.

Dongjin didn’t care if others thought it was strange how he wasn’t happy today. He didn’t care if others thought it was weird how he wasn’t talking today. He didn’t care if others thought that something had happened to him; because today wasn’t just any other rainy day. Today was the two year anniversary of his father’s death. This day, two years ago, changed Dongjin’s life completely. He learned the importance of his family, and most importantly, he learned the importance of happiness. For three months that year, he cried everyday. He didn’t put effort in eating or basically living. He wasn’t close to his dad, but just the fact that he wouldn’t be there anymore impacted the child greatly. More than any other could imagine.

No one knew that this was the reason why Dongjin was acting this way except for Lee Chan. His friend knew that he would only become emotionless on this day, otherwise, he wouldn’t dare share the sadness he feels with others.

“Hey,” Chan smiled softly at his best friend, sitting in front of him with his tray in hand,”rainy days, huh?”

Dongjin nodded, scooping up a spoonful of rice into his mouth.

Chan twisted his lips in thought; Dongjin was always incredibly sensitive on rainy days such as this.

“Aren’t you going to eat?” Dongjin quietly asked.

“Oh, yeah.” Chan hurriedly ate his food, glancing at the younger from time to time.

Dongjin let out a sigh before he lifted his head, met eyes with Chan, and faked a smile,”Don’t worry about me, Chan. I’ll be fine.”

Chan frowned,”You don’t have to-”

Before Chan could finish, Dongjin stood up to throw away his tray,”I’m fine, really.”

Dongjin threw away his trash and exited the cafeteria, leaving Chan staring at the slumped back fading further and further away from the entrance.

I just fake a smile and hope that my suffering would save everyone else from having to suffer as badly as this. Because if being in pain makes everyone around me happy, then I don’t mind painfully faking a smile.

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a/n: hey guys! happy wednesday~ here's a chapter as a present because it's my birthday huehuehue.~ i hope you guys enjoy it! and thank you for subscribing! ✿◕ ‿ ◕✿