CAMPBELLism

CAMPBELLism
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What is marriage?

The myth tells you what it is. It is the reunion of separated duad. Originally, you were one. You are now two in the world, but the recognition of the spiritual identity is what marriage.

It’s different from a love affair. It has nothing to do with that. It’s another mythological plane of experience. All love affairs end in disappointment.

Her eyes are still focused on the screen where the man, she thought was a ‘genius’, was being interviewed by Bill Moyers, an American Journalist who won the 1988 Emmy Awards for this series. She was bothered. Just the word marriage caused her to act like a lunatic. A lunatic lady. Or say, not really.

But marriage is recognition of a spiritual identity.

If we live a proper life, if our minds are on the right qualities in regarding the person of the opposite , we will find our proper male or female counterpart.

But if we are distracted by certain sensuous interests, we’ll marry the wrong person

At some point, she will nod her head like she’s the one talking with him. She’s learning about MARRIAGE. For Pete’s sake, who the hell will think that she’s listening to a program talking about that sheez? None. Cause it’s hilarious.

 “Marriage? The hell… I’m already twenty nine.” She whispered, eyes still glued on the two persons sitting on the studio while talking about Myths. Marriage is a myth and it will always be, she said to herself, while laying her back on the couch and let herself smile unconsciously. She put her hands on both sides careful not to touch the pillow. She does not want to. She would not want to.

Her phone rang just as she turns the TV off. Great, now’s not the time, she said to herself and flickered the phone active.

She can hear the chant again. She gasped and pursed her lips tightly. No, she will not cry, not anymore. Everything is over now. She knows she’d move on. She’s trying to move on. So hell, let the wind carry those water. Puh-lease.

“You

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Crispa
I am bored and sleepy and sometimes it is the reason why I write. Critiquing poems is not that easy, I am challenging you to try doing it before midnight.

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xxxiG-DARAGONxxi
#1
Chapter 1: KYAAAAAAAH!
Pasta-
#2
Chapter 1: And it was cute and worthy to be called fluff. heck, it's fluff in every way. lol. And just so you know, I love the ending since it's cute and I can imagine them just doing that.

Thank you for sharing this. You should publicize this because who knows, people could offer a different perspective on this fic. Hurhur.

P.S: Sorryyyy bb, it took a week to comment on this because your master is busy fangirling over bbq. Mehehe. Love you. Write more. <3
Pasta-
#3
Chapter 1: Sometimes, it still feels awkward to read this 'fluff' because you know in real life, it doesn't seem to be 'your thing' (lol) but knowing that this was supposed to be mine and bbq's is kind of overwhelming. lol, okay moving on.

I think that one of your strengths is dialogue. I liked the exchange of lines between your characters and I think it's a good thing because the lines are what actually improves a story (well for me). Conversation with boring lines makes a specific part of the story dull. So I say that you maintain it and don't explain everything through convos. Let the reader figure it out. ;)

On the other hand, there are few parts that are confusing because the situation is not fully explained. I get the idea of wanting to maintain the mystery but sometimes we get too absorbed in trying to conceal things (and wanting to let the reader figure things out) that we reveal too little that can cause confusion. For example, the chant (I thought it was like a fanchant or smth (hehe), maybe you can describe what kind of chant it is?); the part where Dara said she 'moved on' (maybe you can add to the line the reason why she has to move on and from where, without actually revealing much?); and the part when she said 'after what you did', (you can also be particular on what did he do that made her upset - like she's blaming him because of her hormones, or because he made her preggy, or was it because he attended the show, smth like that haha). You should add more description to support your dialogue. Hihi

In terms of grammar, I don't think there are major problems on that. Just take note of the tenses and parallelism. :)

I like your reference to Campbell in explaining what marriage is and your characters' stand on it. [But just to be safe, you can put a note on the end of the story to mention from whom the (italicized)lines came from.] Because of it, you lend us, your readers a new perspective on marriage which you supported through the ending of the story. tbc
purple_bee #4
Chapter 1: Aigoo! So cute!
mitchai3667
#5
Chapter 1: nice..plz do not stop writing awesome story!!spread the awesomeness.. ^^
haeroma #6
Chapter 1: wow.. awsome!
codenameclumsy
#7
Chapter 1: Unexpected. I thought they were fighting or what. Cute one, really. I like it :)