It was at that moment I realized I loved you.

You walked in with overflowing confidence,

Confidence I should've been used to and I thought I was,

But my breath hitched and my heart raced like never before.

And I wondered.

It was at that moment I realized I loved you.

Your face showed a beautiful tenacity that I normally was familiar with.

Determined to make a difference in the world,

But before that, you had already somehow made a difference in me.

And I wondered.

Does she feel the same way?

I approached you during the lunch break,

Smiling like I normally do.

We went to the café and chatted

When I told you something I never thought I would.

I accepted your lunch invitation with a warm smile,

Accustomed to this arrangement we had very often.

You took me to the café and we talked

When you uttered three words I always dreamed of you saying.

"I love you."

You gasped and I got a little nervous,

But then you repeated my words back to me

And I felt like I could fly and reach the stars.

We hugged and giggled and cried and almost...

Almost.

I heard those words and an odd type of courage washed over me.

I prepared myself and told you the same thing,

Smiling when it felt like a heavy burden had left my shoulders.

We jumped and laughed and held hands and almost...

Almost.

We almost kissed.

My eyes found your lips,

But a sneering voice I never knew existed came to life,

Telling me the truth I had always avoided, ignored,

And I pushed away, regaining composure.

Running out of the café, I couldn't get the voice out of my head.

The world around me disappeared when you gave me that look,

So I closed my eyes, very sure I wouldn't regret this,

But a hint of doubt crept up in me,

And I pushed away, still in a daze.

You ran away and I stood there, doubt taking over.

She's a girl.

This...this isn't right.

I came back to work,

But for the first time ever,

I couldn't concentrate at all.

The goals I had in mind for years

All seemed to disappear when I saw you.

Knowing my feelings were not one-sided,

I made a decision.

I saw you at work,

And you looked uncharacteristically distracted.

I gulped, swallowing my guilt,

Because I knew it was caused by me.

I felt the uncontainable urge to hold you in my arms,

Something I couldn't deny nor fight.

So I made a decision.

She's a girl but I will love her like no other.

We spent more time together,

Eating, watching movies, playing, traveling.

Those days were the happiest of my life,

But our relationship was still kept a secret

Because the consequences were sure to pull us apart.

But one day, and I don't know how,

It all happened, it all happened too early.

We became more open together.

Every day, I found myself looking forward to seeing you.

I felt like I was in heaven, a special place I never knew I could experience.

Warmth filled my being with everything you did,

But that doubt was still there.

And one day, the manifestation of that doubt appeared.

It all happened, it all happened too early.

They found out.

I tell you I need to handle this alone.

You nod and we go separate ways.

I open my door to an onslaught of words,

Assumptions, accusations, curses.

And before I know it,

I am standing outside a locked door

With a messily packed suitcase

And no home to return to.

We need to face this by ourselves,

So I try to look reassuring as I nod to you and walk away.

I arrive at the front door and am greeted by a horrifying sight:

Smudged make-up, fuming red faces, tears of anger.

Words are thrown back and forth as I try to defend myself,

I try to defend us.

But the retorts are no use and I'm abandoned, thrown away.

I feel like this is a separate reality and I don't know what to do.

Is our love for each other really that wrong?

I see you.

The anchor that keeps my feet on the ground,

The resolve that I admire and aspire to embody.

I run like I've never run before;

Your arms are a haven I need to feel right now.

I see you.

The ball of sunshine that brightens any day of mine,

The optimism that has kept me moving forward for so long.

I smile a broken smile full of relief;

Your presence will fix my wounds, I'm sure of it.

We leap into each other's arms,

Tears streaming down our cheeks.

No words are spoken;

What happened to us

Doesn't need to be told to be known.

You squeeze me tight in your arms.

I smile lightly, getting lost in your embrace.

You bury your face in my neck.

I take a deep breath, your scent making me feel safe again.

I feel an undeniable strength

Coursing through my body,

Giving me perseverance.

I feel an unexplainable fortitude

Reaching every tip of my being,

Giving me determination.

The world might be against us,

But we have each other.

Simply that

Is enough.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~