Minseok looked at the clock anxiously, a cup of macchiato languidly erupting in soft bursts of steam in front of him.  Nervously, he rapped his fingers in the empty coffee shop.   You were never late.  As he tried to will his eyes to look just about anywhere but the ticking clock, he soon lost hope and began to clean up around him, ready to go home.  You weren't coming, and he finally realized it. 

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

You, on the other hand, were experiencing the fresh taste of freedom and independence that came with living abroad.  You had escaped the confines of a suffocating relationship when you decided to drop everything and go.  Running away was your mantra, and even if it was a bad habit, you knew no better way....

"Oppa," you began slowly, as Minseok looked at you uncertainly, "I...."  You faltered as you struggled to find the words to comfor--no, tell him, that you were leaving.  You had already practiced this in front of the mirror for an hour, but you hadn't expect a tearfelt confession that was threatening to rip your calm demeanor apart.  You closed your eyes, and Minseok noted your beautiful eyelashes as they kissed the hollows of your eyes.  You took a deep breath.  "Minseok-ah, I'm leaving.  I'm leaving Korea.  I just can't deal with it anymore.  No one's supposed to know, but you've been there for me through it all, oppa, so I just wanted to let you know.  I'm really sorry, but I can't stay."  Minseok opened his mouth, only to close it, pursing his lips while thinking furiously of something to make you stay.  In reality, he knew that this was what you needed, a result of the painful childhood you had and the controlling relationship you just had.  Finally, after what seemed like an eternity in his head, he managed to give a painful smile, knowing what he was going to say.  

You still had your eyes closed, not daring to open them because you knew he was going to make you stay, even if he uttered nothing.  You desperately tried to think of an escape, and just as a chime signaled a guest, you finally broke your trance, rushing to turn around and run.  "You're busy, oppa, and I need to leave.... Let's just make this a goodbye".  

Your lips trembled at that memory.  Even if he was continents away, you still couldn't get him out of your mind.  You regretted not saying anything, especially now that you had the ability to finally think for yourself.  You admit, your ex still had some influence on you, but you were getting better.  You wanted your heart to be reserved only for Minseok, but it was impossible to pretend like the abuse you've had gathered for the past ten years hadn't impact it at all.  You would learn to live with the pain, but would never compare Minseok to your ex.  You would tell him how you really felt, give him all your heart, and let him decide if he still wants to be with you.  

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You welcomed the chime that greeted you with warm familiarity as you entered the old coffee shop.  When you heard from Soo that Minseok had gone to the emergency room a couple days ago, you knew that your little excursion was over.  You promptly picked up your life abroad in order to catch the earliest flight you could.  You needed to go to him.  You finally found someone who loved you as much as you ever loved before, and you weren't going to waste another second due to fear.  

Your mouth lifted in a childish grin when you realized what was sitting in front of you.  He still hadn't forgot.  

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Minseok returned to the counter to lift up the cup and wipe down the counter, but he realized that it was gone.  Eyebrows furrowing, he looked around to see if it slipped onto the ground without him noticing.  

"You still make the best coffee ever, oppa, but I must say, I'm kind of disappointed that it's gone cold,"  you managed to say, although tears were threatening to fall when you realized how much of him there is now than before.  

Minseok laughed hollowly.  He loved how you would try to cheer him up even when you were facing hell on your own end.  He felt a bit enlightened, but soon he stopped his laughter, inhaling in fear that you were a hallucination.  Walking towards you with his hand outreached, he tried to memorize as much of you as he could, only to realize that you, were in fact, right in front of him.  

Boldly smiling and crying at the same time, you dared to let out a "Miss me?", once again gaining a soft facepalm from Minseok at the ridiculous picture of you in front of him.  Finally breathing, Minseok smiled genuninely for the first time in months as he managed to say, "Here, let me make you another one."

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

So that's how you ended up leaning against the counter, sighing contentedly as you watched Minseok prepare you coffee.  You couldn't lie, one of the reasons why you trusted him so easily was because of his thoughtfulness.  Maybe that's why you liked to visit him so much in the coffeeshop.  As you noticed him stretching to hand you your freshly made coffee, you hitched your breath, biting your lips at the sight of his suspenders.  Or maybe that's why you liked seeing him at the coffee shop.  Your thoughts were interrupted though, when Minseok finally spoke.  

"So.... why are you here now?  Are you back for good, or is this just a visit?  How was life there?", all the while, trying to avoid the embarrassing thing he wanted to know the most, Are you going to open your heart up to me?

You smiled at the amount of questions he had.  "I heard you were in the hospital..."  Minseok tightened his jaw, not wanting to make you worry about him.  "It's fine, I just didn't get enough sleep, please don't worry about me."  As you heard this, you smiled shakily, "Please don't ask me to do that, Minseok oppa, I can't do that.  I'm worried for you, you're so thin now, it makes me worry about your health.  Please let be here for you, oppa, like you had for me for a lifetime."

Minseok nodded slowly,"......So you didn't answer the rest of my questions, are you staying or leaving?"

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

You had practiced this answer.  You wanted it to sound perfect.  "Minseok-ah, I'm staying.  I can't imagine life without you.  I want you to have my heart because I trust you.  You don't have to accept but I just wanted you to know that I have your answer five months later.  I'm ready to be yours, just like how you were ready to be mine.  I want to be yours."

You opened your mouth but your breath hitched again.  "I........ What I mean to say is that....."  Your heart pounded furiously and you could barely make out the ticks coming out of the clock on the right.  You took a deep breath, but it came out shakily, just as your words, "Minseok-ah...."  another deep breath.... "I--".  You glanced back down at your coffee cup, trying to focus on the steam.  Looking straight into his eyes, you were going to recite your speech perfectly but his stillness caught you off- guard.  He looked so innocent right now.  

"I love you."