A/N: I whipped this up a few hours ago so i'm so sorry for any errors or if doesn't make sense.. haha.. but please do review and enjoy ^^

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“Next up, Korea’s number one idol, Kim Taeyeon will be joining us. So stay tuned!” The announcer on the television excitedly exclaims. Who wouldn’t be excited? The most wanted, most popular, most talented, most beautiful, and most perfect everything person in Korea, maybe the whole world will be a guest in your show. Right? I mean c’mon. I bet people in Korea are on the edge of their seats right now, stopping whatever they are doing just to watch that show.

 

Well, I’m not one of them.

 

I switched off the television, earning a shock from my family who are currently hanging around the living room and dining area. Our house is small so you could see what everybody’s doing.

 

“Why did you turn it off? I want to see Taeyeonie~!” says my sister who seizes the remote in my hands violently. She turns on the TV again just in time to see the start of the supposed Taeyeon interview but the star isn’t on screen yet.

 

My mom throws a worried look at me. “What happened to you and Taeyeon? I thought you were friends?” The question shocks me and I turn pale immediately. I stay rooted in my spot trying to stop the flooding memories trying to escape my own Pandora’s box inside my head. Or Taeyeon’s box as I would like to call it.

 

And then I hear it, the voice that haunted my memories, the key to my Pandora’s box. “Annyeonhaseyo Kim Taeyeon-imnida” resounds from the television. I close my eyes tightly, willing out the sound but it’s too much.

 

“I’m going out.” I hurriedly say and my mom and sister do nothing to stop me.

 

---

 

My breath is labored from all the quick movements I did to run out of my own house but I honestly think it’s from my fast heartbeats after hearing Taeyeon’s voice after 4 years of avoiding it like a plague. It made everything real again. Like it did happen. When I wasted 4 years of my life trying to convince myself that it was all a dream. I did it to help me cope. To ease the pain. It seemed to work but it all came crashing down just like that.

 

Pretending helps me tons. It only takes a few minutes of meditation and years of acting to pull it off. Good thing I was able to master that back in high school.

 

Oh . No. I thought about something that I’m not supposed to think about. High school is one of the taboo words I locked inside my box. I shake my head to erase the thought but the desired effect doesn’t come.

 

Just when I thought it won’t get worse. It did.

 

This is what happens when I walk mindlessly. I always somehow end up here in our special place. It’s like my body wants to deal with the problem I expertly try to deny myself of ever resolving.

 

I wait for the tears to flow just like many times before but it doesn’t come. There’s only a dull ache on my chest that reminds me that I’m still supposed to feel things.

 

I still do. But barely.

 

---

 

“Say something about yourself.”

 

“I’m Choi Sooyoung. 21 years old. Third year university student taking Performing Arts.” I say robotically because I really hate being asked this question. I usually don’t know the answer so I stick with the basics.

 

“And you’re here because?” The slightly scary guy interviewing me asks with a stern expression. He’s kind of big, fat, and intimidating but I keep my cool.

 

“I’m applying for dance instructor.” I simply say and I swear he almost laughs at me. I need a part time job to help out my family and I need money for personal expenses. Life is not easy for me.

 

“Kid, do you think that this is a joke?” He says a little bit insulted but the amused expression is still there.

 

“No sir.” I respond seriously. Do I look like I’m here to fool around? I thought but I can’t say that to my maybe future employer. “I’m serious. I brought my own material and some videos. If you want a live audition then—”

 

“Let me stop you right there miss. I’m not going to employ you. You’re too young.” The guy stands up leaving me sitting there with my mouth hanging open. “I’m not a babysitter.”

 

I am about to argue when a distressed looking girl appears in the office’s doorway. “Sir, we have a slight problem.” She says breathlessly and I think she’s lying when she said the problem was slight.

 

“What is it?” The boss clearly has a temper and he’s not very good at hiding it. Or he doesn’t care that there’s a guest in his office. You know, the typical boss type.

 

 

“Our choreographer got injured badly and we can’t find a replacement.” The woman whispers in a hushed voice but I still heard her.

 

The man doesn’t seem to be fazed by the news. “So? We have lots of choreographers! Just go find somebody else.”

 

“Sir, the thing is… Hyoyeon is the one who got injured.” Panic strikes the man’s face as he process what the woman said. He returns to his desk and fumbles through the messy papers lying on top of it.

 

“Yuri? What about Yuri?” The man asks, still looking through the pile.

 

The assistant (or so I think) comes forward trying to stay calm because her boss definitely isn’t. “Sir, Yuri and Yoona are abroad to coach for that dance competition remember? Taemin is also unavailable because he’s currently working with KY entertainment as well as Kai. There’s no one left sir.”

 

The two persons in the room don’t seem to notice me so I stand up wordlessly so I can get the heck out of there before a fit starts. Just as I am about to cross the threshold, the man calls me. “You! Come here!”

 

I gulp and turn around to meet his scary eyes scrutinizing me. The woman eyes me up and down not in an offending kind of way. She seems nice but still sporting a horror stricken face. Clearly, that job is very big for them. I wonder why.

 

“Are you sure you’re a dancer? You’re very thin.” The boss asks me and I nod immediately. “You said you brought videos right?” I nod again. “Give it here.” He holds out his beefy hand and I pass the flash drive on my pocket to him. He plugs it on the laptop and starts to go through my performances. The lady beside him also joins in and from the look on her face I think she’s impressed on what she’s seeing.

 

“You’re pretty good!” She says not taking her eyes off the screen. The boss just grunts in response. That jerk. I bet he’s impressed too but doesn’t want to admit it.

 

I hear the final beats of the song I was dancing to on the computer screen end and they both stare at me judgingly.

 

“How fast can you learn a song?”

 

I pause to feign that I’m thinking because I don’t want them to think I’m cocky. To be honest, I can learn a dance just by looking at it twice. That’s how good I am. So I tell them that.

 

“Twice huh?” The boss says, trying to control the excitement and relief he currently feels. “Let’s see about that.” He turns his laptop around and shows me a video. “Watch this and dance it here right now.” And again, I did just that without breaking a sweat (well, not really.)

 

The man doesn’t bother to hide his enthusiasm anymore. He stands up from his chair, walks towards me, grabs my hands and shakes it. “You’re hired.”

 

---

 

The boss’ secretary, who I came to know as Bomi, leads me to a private dance studio just blocks away from our office building.

 

“So you know that dance the boss showed you earlier?”

 

“Uhuh.”

 

“That’s the piece you’re going to teach. Can you do it?” She asks at me wearily. She had a rough day. I understand that.

 

“Yes, it seems easy.” I confidently say.

 

“Have you had teaching experience before?” She asks as we get inside the dressing rooms so I can change my clothes. I keep answering her questions as I am getting out of my jeans and into my sweats.

 

“Yes, all the time. Whenever we have a production number in school, I always did the choreography and as you know, not everyone can dance but I am able to make them look good.” I elaborate and Bomi seems to be relieved.

 

“What about patience? Do you get irritated easily?”

 

“Hmm.. no, not really.” I say. It’s half true. But it really depends on who I’m teaching but seeing as I applied to this job, I have to be patient to all my students whatever happens.

 

“Okay good. You have no idea how thankful I am that you decided to apply to our company today.” Bomi still looks stressed but she’s more pleasant to look at now. She’s pretty cute.

 

Now is not the time to let my gay rainbow out. I have to concentrate and replay the steps in my head so I won’t mess up. But I doubt that. Even though it’s my first day of work, it’s not my first time teaching dance. So I’m confident that I’ll go through this without a hitch.

 

Or that’s what I thought.

 

---

 

“I have to go now but I trust that you won’t shame our company’s name and jeopardize your employment.” Bomi warns me and I reassure her. “Don’t worry ma’am I will give my 100 percent.” She smiles, pleased at my answer. “Just call me Bomi. I’m sorry I didn’t catch your name. So what is it?”

 

I smile at her and say, “My name is—“

 

“Sooyoung??” Someone beats me to it and the smile on my face falters.

 

I turn to the direction of the voice to find the person I’m not least bit pleased to meet or see ever again.

 

My eyes widens in surprise. She hasn’t changed one bit. She’s still so beautiful and unbelievably short. However, her beauty seemed to enhance because well, she’s a celebrity now. A top star at that.

 

Bomi clears and breaks our not so subtle staring contest. “You guys know each other?” Taeyeon is about to answer the question but I decide that it’s my turn to beat her to it. “Barely.” I say as coldly as I can.

 

I think I see sadness in Taeyeon’s expression but I think nothing of it. Meanwhile, Bomi is oblivious of the awkwardness that’s slowly filling the dance room. “Then this would be a lot easier for you.” Bomi says as she drags me in front of the shortest person in the room. I doubt it.

 

“Miss Kim, she will replace Hyoyeon as your dance instructor because as you know, Hyoyeon has been injured, I hope that you will find this arrangement suitable.” Bomi says straight forwardly. She’s good at this.

 

“Yes sure, no problem I understand.” Taeyeon replies.

 

“Should you encounter any problems, you can always call our office.” Bomi continues. Taeyeon nods and says. “I don’t think it’ll be necessary.”

 

“Alright, I’ll leave the both of you alone.” Bomi bows and Taeyeon does it back and before I know it, I am alone in a room with my ex-girlfriend.

 

This is so not going to end well.

 

“Hi.” Is the first thing that comes out of .

 

“Yeah. Hi.” Is what I reply without looking at her.

 

“So…uhhh…” She starts again and in my head I just want this to session to end. I really don’t know what to say to her and I’m not prepared for this. Although, I have practiced what I’m going to say to her in my mind hundreds of times if I ever see her again but I can’t remember any of those pretend scenarios I’ve conjured. My mind went blank the moment I saw her and all I can think about is the fact that she grew even more beautiful and flawless than she already was before.

 

I clear my throat for I realized that we’ve been standing there and wasting our time instead of actually doing some work so I decided to take control. “Which part did Miss Hyoyeon left you?” I professionally ask. I’m surprised how well I’m holding myself. This is really not what I expect our first meeting would be like.

 

“Uhm… We haven’t really done a lot because she always goofs around. But she managed to teach me some of the first parts of the dance.” Taeyeon says in a small voice.

 

“Oh.” I say. Damn it. If they haven’t progressed at all, this will take a lot longer than I expected. I try my best not to show any kind of emotions as possible. This is just a job and it’ll be over soon. I keep repeating those words in my head and it kind of calms me a bit. All I need to do now is try to think straight when looking at Taeyeon’s gorgeous face. Okay, no, I did not just think that. Concentrate Sooyoung!

 

“Just do some warm ups first alright? You know how to do that don’t you?” I ask and she nods. “Okay great.” I leave her alone to get the tablet Bomi lent me. It contains the video of the dance in case I need to refresh my memory of the dance steps. I didn’t really need to look at it but I want to look at other things rather than watch Taeyeon stretch in front of me. That’s not really the ideal thing to do.

 

I decide to do warm ups as well because watching the dance video is not doing anything for me. I turn my back at her but I am faced at the mirror and still can see her reflection. I notice her eyes haven’t left me and I avoid blushing under her gaze. Now is not the time to think of that. So I continue stretching and ignore her completely.

 

After 10 minutes both of us finished doing our warm up exercises. It’s time to do this.

 

“You ready?” I ask her not avoiding her eyes this time. She returns my stare with an intense one and I shiver a bit. My Taeyeon’s box suddenly gives me a flashback of how she does that when she’s incredibly and we’re about to…

 

“Sooyoung?” She calls out. Oh snap! I just lost myself for a moment there. Damn it… This is more dangerous than I thought. I need to be careful.

 

We ran through a series of steps and she keeps messing up a lot. I forgot that she’s not really good at dancing. Maybe that’s why she needs this private lesson in the first place.

 

“Okay I think you need to take a break.” I say and she huffs in relief.

 

“Thanks, I thought you’re going to kill me of exhaustion.” She quips and I’m not sure if it’s a real joke or a sarcastic joke. But I shrug it off. “I don’t understand why I need to be in this musical play. I’m not good at dancing.” She says as goes directly to where her duffel bag is to grab a towel and a bottle of water. In my case I forgot to buy water. Crap.

 

I watch her gulp that water in envy, feeling the dryness of my throat. She notices and offers me some. “No it’s okay.” I decline even though I really need a drink right now. Not just water, a bottle of soju would be good too.

 

“You are still as stubborn as ever.” She grips my forearm and places the bottle in my hand forcibly. I feel fire spread through my chest the moment her hand touches my skin. It’s as if my dead heart jolted and awakened just by that gesture.

 

She must’ve realized she’s holding onto me without permission so she pulls away like she just got burned. Maybe the look on my face also made her unclench her hand from my arm. But it was me who got burned. I can still feel the lingering warmness her hand created on my skin. This is not good.

 

She clears and urges me to drink the water. “I still have some more left so drink it all. You need it.” And she disappears to go to the bathroom.

 

---

 

“Taeng… stop it…” Sooyoung whines while Taeyeon keeps on and kissing her neck. She only receives a ‘hmm’ as a reply while Taeyeon continues her actions. She can’t believe she got just by the sound of Taeyeon’s moan. Her body is currently on Taeyeon’s mercy and she can’t do anything about it.

 

Sooyoung gathers her last willpower and pushes the girl off of her. Taeyeon stares at her challengingly. “Do you really want me to stop Soo?” The taller girl bobs her head slowly, unsure of what she really wants to happen. She’s torn to be honest.

 

“Really?” Taeyeon whispers seductively in Sooyoung’s ear. The younger girl shivers when Taeyeon’s breath hit her and her head flies back when she feels Taeyeon’s hand between her legs. “I don’t believe you.” Taeyeon’s hand slowly enters Sooyoung’s shorts pushing past her underwear.

 

“Look how wet you are. You want this too.” Taeyeon evilly seduces her and Sooyoung is a goner. She let Taeyeon do whatever she wants because she doesn’t have enough self-control left. She hears Taeyeon’s laugh of triumph and her scream of pleasure as she feels the older girl’s tongue on her .

 

---

 

Why the hell am I thinking about that?! I catch myself digging deeper into my dreaded box of Taeyeon’s memories. I’m supposed to have forgotten all about that. But one single touch unleashes everything I kept hidden for the past 4 years. Just when I thought her voice was deadly.

 

Taeyeon comes back from the bathroom but there is a different look in her face than before. Her expressions are darker and quite y to be honest. I decide to ignore it and get back into business before I even combust in self-hatred. “Ready to try it again?” I ask. But this time she doesn’t reply. She stares at me with her eyebrows scrunched like she’s conflicted or something.

 

“Are you currently seeing anyone?” She asks out of the blue. That definitely surprised me.

 

“No.” I directly say and suddenly she becomes a blur. She pounces on me and we both ended up on the floor. The pain I feel is forgotten when I feel her lips in mine. I don’t kiss back because I’m still processing what happened plus my head is spinning. I give in and start to respond to her kisses but this can’t end up like before. I came into my senses as I push her away forcefully.

 

“What do you think you’re doing?!” I ask in anger and shock.

 

“I just thought—“ She begins but I think she doesn’t intend to finish that sentence. Why in the world would she think this is okay? I didn’t give her any signs of wanting to do this right?

 

“You think what?” I demand. “You’re insane if you think I would give in just like that. I’m not the same person I was before. You don’t have the right to do this to me anymore Taeyeon.” I say her name with venom on my voice and she visibly flinches.

 

“Are you still mad about that?” Did I hear her right? Did she just ask me that question?

 

I give her an are-you-ing-kidding-me look. “What do you think?!”  She stays quiet and I continue. This is it. This is my chance. Let my anger be unleashed.

 

“You think I’d be okay after what you did to me?! You left me after I begged you not to. You went away even if I told you I couldn’t live without you. You still left after you made me fall madly in love with you! So tell me, how could I forgive you Taeyeon? Tell me.” I shakingly say, fighting off the tears that are threatening to fall. Taeyeon doesn’t hide it though. She starts to cry silently in front of me.

 

“I needed to… You know that…” She says trying to defend herself. I scoff. “Do I?”

 

She doesn’t reply. So I do all the talking. “These past four years I did all I can to forget you. To forget how much I loved you. To forget all the memories we had. It wasn’t easy you know? I saw you everywhere. Literally. My house, outside my house, in my room, on television, on magazines. . You are ing everywhere. It wasn’t easy but I was able to somehow numb myself so I will stop hurting.”

 

“My mom and my sister still thinks you are the most awesome person in the whole world, especially now that you are a celebrity. But I never told them that you aren’t.” Tears are freely falling from my eyes and I don’t bother to wipe them away. Meanwhile, Taeyeon is sobbing her heart out in front of me. Well, she deserves it.

 

“You played with me and my feelings. You hid me from everybody. You turned me ing gay. Then you left me and I didn’t know what to do with myself.” I chuckle sarcastically. “The worst part is, I had no one to talk to about it. Not only I was scared, I was scared for you.”

 

“That’s why I left you!” Taeyeon suddenly breaks out. “I’m scared for both of us.”

 

“For both of us? Really? Not only for yourself?” I ask feigning amusement and she knows that. “Do you want a thank you gift?” That is a bit harsh but all the pent up anger I felt all these years suddenly flows out like a dam and I can’t stop myself.  

 

“Fine! I left because I was scared that it would affect my image if they found out I’m seeing you! I didn’t want to ruin my career before it even began! Is that what you want to hear?!” Taeyeon’s outburst shocks me. I was goddamn right. She did leave because she only thought about herself.

 

“But you know what? There was never a day I didn’t regret doing it. I always thought of you and ask myself if it was worth it. If all of the fame, the money, the popularity worth throwing what we had. And I know the answer to that. But I’m scared. So scared.” She hugs herself with her own arms and I have the urge to replace her arms with mine. But I restrained myself.

 

“I always think of going back to you but I thought you might not want to see me again. And to be honest I don’t know what to do to get you back. So I started burying myself into my work that’s why I’m where I am. But I can’t rid myself of the loneliness… No matter what I do, no matter how many awards I achieve, I’m not really happy.” Serves you right is what I thought of first but then I get what she’s talking about.

 

“If you think you’re the only one who suffered, then you’re wrong.” Taeyeon buries her face on her hands and sobs violently while I stand there watching her, my anger vanishing suddenly and is replaced by weariness and longing.

 

I take a small step forward, my legs feeling heavy and unwilling. Still I force myself to reach her and wrap my arms around her. As Taeyeon feels my embrace, she shakes more violently and mumbles hundreds of ‘I’m sorrys’ on my chest. I rub her back with my arms and I place m chin on her head, a gesture we always do when we were in this position way back.

 

“Shhh… stop crying.” I whisper and I feel fresh tears pouring down my face. “I’m sorry too. I was just really angry.”

 

I hear a quiet “I know.” from her  and we stay like that for a while.

 

We detach ourselves from one another not sure of what to do next. But Taeyeon breaks the silence. “I know you’re not yet prepared to forgive me and I’m willing to give you time. But I will win you back Sooyoung. Now that I found you again, I’ll definitely do everything right this time. I was horrible to you back in high school and I hid you from my friends and my family. But I was stupid then. I know better now. If you would give me a chance, I want you to watch me earn you.”

 

“But what about your career?” I ask not convinced of what she’s telling me.

 

“What about it? It doesn’t matter.” She confidently says. “Getting you back is the most important thing I can think about right now.”

 

I’m not entirely sure if Taeyeon means all of these things she just told me. I’m not even sure if I trust her. But she says she wants to win me back. The thought gives me butterflies in my stomach.

 

“I love you Sooyoung.” She suddenly says and my eyes grow wide.

 

“Uhmm…” I really don’t know how to respond to that right now so I just say, “I think we need to get back to dancing.” I avoid her by going to the sound system but I hear her say, “You don’t have to say it back right now. But I will wait for the day you will say those words to me again.”

 

Then I made a bet to myself which will happen first, Taeyeon learning the dance steps or Taeyeon getting me back.

 

 

The End.

 

 

~geumanhaeyo