Moving On

by Mahogany4

They said you know when you’ve already moved on when your heart is ready to be hurt again. While you keep the pain of the past…until you let go of the fear to fall…You are still holding on.

One of the hardest thing to do is wake up early in the morning.  On ordinary days, it’s like torture to pull yourself up. But nothing will get done by just lying on bed. It’s even harder when you are dreading the events of the day. And it’s not just the ordinary scare of facing the bulk of work for the day…Today’s event is scarier than that.

Sulli dragged herself up and prepared herself for the event. She looked at her bag to see if she has enough cash with her for the day and saw the invitation for the wedding.

It’s her best friend’s wedding. But that’s not the scary part…Sulli is more than happy that her closest friend is finally settling down. Her best friend will be a perfect bride…The scary part is…The groom.

It’s been 3 years since Sulli has seen the guy. And it would  have been nice if she doesn’t see him again. But here she is going to their wedding. She can’t be absent. Her best friend is too precious to ignore.

Sulli took an old shoe. She did not bother to buy a new one. She’s busy at work…and also…she wanted to wear the shoe one last time…It was a shoe given to her by the groom back in high school…So just for this wedding…she’ll wear it…and then she’s going to throw it away…like the memories flooding her mind now….she’ll dispose of them.

Sulli took a cab going to the church. She doesn’t know whether she’ll wish for time to stop so that she can calm herself first. Or should she wish for time to speed up so that the wedding is already over.

Sulli arrived at the church and saw the people waiting outside. There are a lot of them.  Sulli did not expect this number of people.  The wedding hasn’t started yet.

Anxiety covered Sulli’s mind. She decided to walk around the church while waiting. It’s not a big church…but it’s peaceful outside the hustle and bustle of the city.

Sulli heard someone whistling. She continued walking by the church garden.

And then she stopped. There’s a man standing at the back of the church leaning on the wall and looking up while whistling a tune. This tall…Elegant looking man is new to Sulli’s eyes. Ahh….maybe he’s the visitor from the groom’s side.

Sulli walked on.

“I wish I can escape.” Said the man

Suli turned to look at him.

“Huh? Oh..sorry…I thought you were talking to me.” Said Sulli.  Sulli turned to leave.

“I am.” Said the man

Huh?

“I am talking to you.” Said the man. The man looked around telling Sulli that there’s no one else there.  “Oh, do you think I was talking to myself?” said the guy a smirk on his lips.

Sulli shook her head. “I’m sorry. I just thought…”

“Do you do that? Talk to yourself?” asked the man

“Not often…except today….I guess.” Said Sulli

“Me too…I usually don’t talk to strangers…except today.” Said the man.

Sulli’s eyebrows raised questioning.

“This is a day when…I’d rather try something I haven’t done before than stand inside this church smiling awkwardly. “ said the man.

This man…said the words Sulli is feeling inside.

Sulli stood beside the man.

“Yeah…me too…”

A gentle wind blew on them. It felt so relaxing just standing there.

“Which side are you attending for?” asked the man

“The Bride. And you?” asked Sulli

“The groom.” Said the man.

“I’m Minho by the way.” Said Minho

“I’m Sulli.” Said Sulli

There was a moment of silence.

“I was close with the bride though.” Said Minho

“Really?” But Krystal never told her about a Minho guy

“Yeah…she…was someone special to me.”

Sulli’s eyes widen.

“Is the bride…your ex girlfriend or something?” asked Sulli

“She and I had a special friendship…almost became a couple…But we went to college…so we had to part ways…but she met my best friend …and now she’s marrying him.” Said Minho

Sulli felt something tremble inside her.

“Wow…that sounds familiar.” Said Sulli

“Huh?” asked Minho

“The Groom…was my ex boyfriend back in high school. He was my first love…But he went to college…and then one day he just broke up with me…and when he went back…he was already in a relationship…with my best friend.” Said Sulli

Minho looked at Sulli surprised.

“What an irritating couple…to have made us suffer like that.” Said Minho shaking his head in disbelief.

Sulli chuckled and nodded. “Yes they are.”

“So how much did it hurt?” asked Minho

“Like boiling water poured on unprotected skin…over and over…until I felt no more.” Said Sulli

“That’s really painful.” Said Minho

“Didn’t it hurt you?” asked Sulli

“Like hell it did. It was like I literally felt he ground shaking but there was no earthquake…I thought that’s the end of everything I ever wanted in life.” Said Minho

Sulli took a  deep breath…Her breakup with the Groom was ugly…and it felt exactly how Minho described it.

“How many bottles of soju did you drink?” asked Sulli

“Countless…I won’t even try counting.” said Minho

“Yeah?” Sulli laughed. “I only had 2. Each time…I got really drunk that I almost went to my best friend to stop their engagement.”

“You haven’t gotten over him?” asked Minho

“I thought I did…I really thought…Until the wedding invitation came…and then suddenly…all the pain came back.” Said Sulli

Minho nodded. “Seeing their names side by side on the invitation…was torture.”

“How about you? Did you have any girlfriend after the bride?” asked Sulli

“No.” said Minho “I guess my friends are right…Since that time…I have put a wall…every time I get too close with a woman…I tend to distance myself…I just…don’t want to fall hard again…it was…unbearable.” Said Minho

Sulli nodded. She knows how it is to be afraid.

Sulli lifted her face as she felt the wind.

“Do you think that after the wedding…we could finally move on since they are forever tied with their husband or wife already?” asked Minho

“I was hoping that will happen…but who knows.” Said Sulli

“I’d give my best friend a good beating for giving a pretty girl like you heartache in the past.” Said Minho

“Me too.” Said Sulli “I’ll make sure my best friend knows what she lost when she let you go.”

Minho chuckled.

The bell of the church started.

“Well…I enjoyed this, Sulli. I wish we can talk again next time.” Said Minho

“Yeah. Since you’re the groom’s best friend..I think we’ll still see each other.” Said Sulli

Minho nodded.

Sulli walked past Minho.

“Wait.” Said Minho

“Huh?”

“Once you have finally moved on…can you…let me know?” asked Minho

Sulli smiled. “Yeah…And I wish to know when You have moved on too.”

Minho grinned. “That’s a deal then.”

Sulli walked on. Minho behind her.

When they reached the door of the church both of them stopped.

Are their eyes tricking them?

There are two pairs to be wed?!

Sulli walked towards Krystal.

“Hey.” Said Sulli

“Sulli!” Krystal hugged Sulli “I’m so happy that you’re here.”

Sulli hugged Krystal back. “I’m happy for you Krystal” Sulli can’t believe it…the words she just said…are actually sincere. After all the anxiety the entire day…she actually really wish Krystal and her Husband real happiness!

Sulli looked on her right. Minho approached the other pair. He hugged the groom.

“Oh. Do you know them?” asked Krystal

“Huh? No.” said Sulli “Who are they?” asked Sulli

“Well…we also don’t know them that well. We met them here on the day we made church reservations. Since this is the only open time for the church…both of us couples decided that a double wedding is not a bad idea. We were all in a hurry to get married.” Said Krystal

“So…you don’t know them then…” said Sulli. Sulli felt something close to disappointment.

Minho looked back at Sulli. By the narrowing of his eyes and his slight smile, Sulli knows Minho has already realized it too.

They were not talking of the same couple! What a confusion!

They all entered the church and the ceremony started. The groom looked at Sulli and said something no one can hear. But Sulli knows what he said. “Thank you for coming.” And Sulli doesn’t regret it. She feels happy that she came. She’s happy that there will now be full closure of the past.

After the ceremony, Sulli walked out of the church. Sulli saw Minho from afar helping his best friend and his wife to their car.

“I better get going. See you in the reception.” Said Sulli

“You better be there. I am going to pass the flower to you.” said Krystal

Sulli chuckled. “Let’s see if it’s already my time to be next then.”

“Woah…you sound positive now. This is the first time in years that you sounded a bit positive about love life.” Said Krystal

“Hmm…I don’t know why…maybe because I have to leave all my hang ups behind. I have a Moving On report to give someone. So I better make sure I move-on fast.” said Sulli

“Huh?” Krystal looked confused.

“Nevermind.” Said Sulli

Sulli walked on after hugging Krystal.

She reached the gate of the church when she heard someone calling her name. When she looked back, she saw a familiar man running after her.

Minho?

Minho was still catching his breath when he caught up with Sulli.

“I’m glad I made it to you before you left.” Said Minho

“Why?” asked Sulli

“I…think that we did not close our conversation earlier properly.” said Minho

“Huh? I thought we did. We had a deal to tell each other if we’ve already moved on, right?” Said Sulli

“That was under the assumption that my best friend was marrying your best friend.” Said Minho “And that was also under the assumption that we’ll see each other again soon.”

“Hmm…ok…” Sulli didn’t get what Minho meant.

“What I’m trying to say is…since my best friend did not marry your best friend…it won’t be easy to see each other…so…the way we should have ended the conversation earlier is like this.” Said Minho

Minho took a  deep breath.

“Are you busy tomorrow night? If you’re not busy…Can I ask you out?” asked Minho

Sulli blinked a few times… opening automatically.

Minho chuckled. He found Sulli’s reaction cute.

“It’s been a long time since I last tried…but I want to try again…with someone who knows how it is to hang on…And eventually let go. ”  Said Minho “It won’t be easy…But I want to try it with someone who is also trying.”

Sulli smiled.

“You’re asking me for a date?” asked Sulli

“Yes.” Said Minho “I want to date you please.”

“Do you promise not to beat your best friend anymore?” asked Sulli

“Yes.” Said Minho “I won’t give him a good beating anymore.  He’s innocent.”

“Then let’s date.” Said Sulli

Minho reached for Sulli’s cheek and pinched it lightly. Sending pink blush up Sulli’s face.

Minho looked back at the couple in the car.

“I wish them a good life together.” Said Minho

Sulli looked at Krystal and her husband who are taking pictures by the church.

“Me too. I sincerely wish them well. ”

They said you know when you’ve already moved on when your heart is ready to be hurt again. When you let go of the pain of the past…and take the courage to fall again….that’s the only time when you’ve really moved on.