I’m so dumb.
Natural selection should hurry up and get rid of me, it’d do the world a huge favor because next to being as articulate as an eggplant I’m also in possession of a sieve-like brain. Which is responsible for the creepy grin Luna is flashing me right now.
Maybe I should have informed her that “don’t tell anyone” included our very own little ice princess, also known as the girl who is currently sitting next to me on the couch, miraculously unaware of the thumbs-up the vocalist is sending our way.

I’m lucky that Victoria is sitting next to Luna at the kitchen table, reading a magazine and unknowingly keeping the other girl from downright congratulating us on our relationship.

Sulli is sitting to Krystal’s left, keeping her occupied for the moment.
I tear my gaze away from Luna and make eye contact with our groups visual. She looks back at me curiously, her line of vision shifts for a second before it settles on me again, a questioning expression on her face.  
Crap, I forgot to tell her that Luna knows.
If I don’t act quickly someone is going to start asking questions and we all know that that is going to end in a disaster.
To no one’s surprise life chooses exactly this moment to be a huge because Krystal realizes that something else has captured Sulli’s attention and turns around, staring me down.
When did living become such a pain? What am I doing wrong? Why are pomegranates so hard to peal?
I return her death-glare with a forced smile but her face remains stoic.

“You look constipated.”

She tilts her head to the side with a raised eyebrow, unimpressed with me interrupting their previous conversation. The girl behind her just shakes her head in amusement.
But Krystal just gave me a pretty good idea…

“Actually I’m not feeling so good. We had some pretty weird stuff for breakfast, right Sulli?”

I put a hand over my stomach, let out a groan and contort my features as if I were in pain, squeezing my eyes shut. I risk a quick glance at her, praying that this ridiculous act will pay off.
Please say yes, please say yes, please say-

“Err… yeah, I feel kind of nauseous.”

Holy , she said yes. I’m a freaking genius.
I resist the urge to high-five myself, because that would be simultaneously the most pathetic action of my life and look all sorts of suspicious.
To my surprise a hand comes into contact with my forehead and I open my eyes to find Krystal’s staring right back at me. One moment later she leans back again, her expression showing a tad of concern.

“Go and get some medicine, I don’t want your germs all over me.”

Isn’t she the sweetest girlfriend ever?

I smile tersely at her and nod, trying to keep my act up for as long as necessary. Sulli doesn’t seem to have the same concerns as me because she’s trying her hardest to hold back a laugh, not looking “nauseous” at all.
After I’m upright I grab her hand, applying pressure on it until she at least fakes a cough. I doubt that it’s one of the symptoms of food poisoning but… there was an attempt.
Luna is regarding the scene in front of her with interest as I walk over to her and pull her up, making my way straight to the bathroom. On the way there I can hear the distinct sound of a body part colliding with furniture and look back to see Luna rubbing her elbow.
I shove the two girls into the tiny space and close the door behind me, breathing a sigh of relief.

“Guys, we need to talk.”

Sulli props herself up on the sink whereas Luna is still tending to her elbow, returning my serious expression with a glare. I flinch at the sight, knowing quite well that hitting your “funny bone” isn’t a laughing matter.

“If this is some kind of intervention it better be about how horrible you looked with semi-long hair or I’m never going to forgive you.”

I reach for my hair in defense and grimace at the unkind reminder of my previous hairstyle. I had to cut some of it off two weeks ago after our management noticed how I started to resemble Chewbacca. They contemplated to try out a more feminine look but the image didn’t work for me and it was quickly decided to let me return to normal. I feel more at ease this way and Krystal told me that she prefers it kept short, so it’s a win-win situation.
But to return to the problem at hand.

“No, it’s not about past fashion choices, however bad they might have been.”

Luna slaps me on the arm for the obvious statement, a grin replacing her frown from before.

“I gathered as much. So please, enlighten me.”

This is not one of my most dignified moments, I tell you that.
My hands intervene with each other repeatedly as I fidget with them, gosh, this is embarrassing.

“I forgot to tell you that… err, Krystal doesn’t want anyone to know about our relationship.”

Sulli looks at me like I’ve grown another head.

“Wait, wait, wait! You told her about Soojung?”

I nod reluctantly, feeling my cheeks getting hotter.

“I don’t know if I should laugh or cry.”

Kids, never lie to your parents about being sick because it’s going to come back to bite you right in the . My ingenious acting from earlier has led me to be stuck in the same room with the two most obnoxious people in the whole world.
Like the good natured girl that she is, Krystal decided to tell our leader about the apparent “terminal-illness” we had suddenly caught. And because Vic likes to mother us she pushed us all in the same room and disappeared into the kitchen to try out her mom’s hot and sour soup recipe. 
Usually I’d find that heartwarming but today her kindness has guided me directly towards hell.
Admittedly, it is my fault that the tree of us are stuck in here but that isn’t an invite to pester me with insufferable questions.
At first it was innocent stuff like how long we’ve been dating (“A while.”) or what our first date was like (“Not bad.”). They didn’t seem to mind my curt answers because they kept on chatting animatedly, giggling and making up ridiculous theories about how I asked Krystal out for the first time. But soon their interrogation took on a more… risqué tone.

“So, how was your first…?”

My mind completely shuts down. 
Luna lets out a high-pitched squeal at the question, her big eyes looking at me expectantly.
Sulli has the decency to at least blush, but still looks more composed than my poor self. I’m reduced to a stuttering mess, heat radiating off my cheeks. Nope, this is so not happening right now! Aren’t friends supposed to not be interested in other’s life? I’d definitely be repulsed if I knew who some of my label-mates have banged in their past. Ew, the mental imagine alone of some of them… stop it, Amber!
They notice my discomfort and knit their eyebrows together, confused by my reaction. Wait, what? They didn’t seriously expect me to just start blurting out every last detail of what is clearly my own business, right?

“Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Why are you all flushed?”

Luna points at my face which is still colored a nice red shade, as if it’s abnormal for me to be embarrassed by the fact that they want me to recite the story of my first time.

“I saw the house-sized hickey she left on you, Amber. It’s not exactly a secret that you guys kiss each other.”

I just sit there, dumbfounded with my mouth hanging wide open.
Kiss..?
This is about kissing?
Holy this is about kissing, , , . Quick, find a way to cover up your mistake!

“I just don’t think it’s a story worth telling. It was kind of awkward on my part.”

Not exactly a lie. While I did nearly knock out her teeth on accident the story on its own is very entertaining. Gosh, I was so jittery that day.

“Really? Don’t know why but I always thought you’d be a good kisser.”

Hey, I am! Not that Krystal ever told me that straight out but if her wobbly knees are any indication I must be pretty fantastic. Breath-taking even, like a cool glass of water on a hot summer’s day or opening your first present on Christmas and okay I’m exaggerating but at least she never complained!

Of course the door has to open before I have the opportunity to defend myself and Victoria steps inside with a tray of food.

“Hey, why aren’t you in bed like I told you?”

Not fair! I for my part am sitting on my bed while Luna and Sulli are infiltrating my space. I scoot away from them and send Vic a pleading look.

“You two should leave her alone. She looks like she’s running a fever.”

Did I ever mention that she’s my favorite member? You go girl, tell them!
I wink at them as they’re being scolded but my celebration comes to a halt as the two are ushered out of the room by Vic, leaving me here to rot in silence with a bowl of soup as my only companion.

“Get well soon, Amber.”

And just like that she closes the door behind her and leaves with the other girls.
Damn, what am I supposed to do now? I can’t just go out to Vic and Krystal, they’d get suspicious at my swift recovery. And what if they decide to check up on me?
I sigh and lie flat on my stomach, horribly annoyed with myself and hoping that I will fall asleep so that the next hours will pass quickly.

Something is applying soft pressure on my shoulders and I can feel the weight on my back, not heavy enough to be uncomfortable but none the less there. The soothing touches continue, working their way down my spine and travelling up again, massaging my temple. I let out a muffled groan, making the person on top of me halt in their movements.

“How are you feeling?”

I smile and turn my head to the left, allowing myself to breathe more freely after being pressed face down on my pillow for so long. My girlfriend’s fingers find their way back to my hair, brushing some of it out of my eyes, allowing me to have a clearer view of her. She looks as stunning as ever, porcelain-like skin framed perfectly by silky locks. But it’s the knowing glint in her eyes and the captivating curve of her lips that make my heart beat out of my chest every time I see her.

“A lot better.”

She returns my smile and I could swear I’m standing still on top of a roller coaster, the familiar fluttering feeling in my belly before it drives over the edge and cascades downwards. I’d spend the rest of the day staring at her if it weren’t for the awkward position, straining my neck badly.
I interlock my fingers on top of the pillow and rest my head on them, sighing as I feel Krystal shifting on top of me until the length of her body is pressed against mine. Her arms hold me around my midriff, making my shirt ride up as she presses her hands flat against my exposed flesh. 

“Is that so?”

She breathes the words in the most sinful way imaginable and brushes her lips alongside my jaw. Good thing she can’t see my face clearly, I must resemble a tomato.
Her fingers glide over the planes of my stomach, higher and higher, until they reach the hem of my sports bra. She scrapes her fingernails over the rubber band, the sensation still distinct on my skin. A second later her wandering hands are on their path down once more, dipping even lower than before. The blood in my vessels is boiling as I bite down on my knuckles, stifling any moans that may escape my mouth. Her fingertips reach my waistband and disappear under them, letting her hands rest on the fabric of my boxer shorts.

“You’re temperature is still pretty high, babe.”

In a matter of seconds she has regained her original posture and has removed her hand from anywhere “inappropriate”. She’s back to just sitting on top of me, probably with a sly grin adorning her features.  Playing these little games is some kind of hobby to her, teasing me until I’m on the verge of tears. I don’t literally cry but, hell, do I feel like it sometimes. She often does it when she’s mad at me, like the last time after she found me in Sulli’s room, but more often than not she just enjoys me getting worked up about it.

“Krystal.”
“Yes?”
“You’re the worst.”

That only makes her giggle and I roll my eyes at myself, already feeling my resolve crumble. She carefully gets up and removes herself from my back. I sit up as well and turn around, this time being able to stop her before she can flee the room like two days before. I hold onto her forearm, and pull her close again until she’s sitting in my lap. She slings her arms around my neck and gives me a warning glare.

“I’m gonna end you if you get your germs on me.”

I let out a chuckle and lean in, seeing her do the same. Her eyelids flutter close as she tightens her grip on me, tugging me closer. I part her lips with my thumb, fascinated by the shaky breath she exhales. Now it’s my fingers that explore her, tracing her jawline and bottom lip. I let my eyes fall shut and interlock or mouths in a first gentle kiss. There’s no urgency in it, just her soft lips melting into mine as she threads her fingers through my hair. I tilt my head to the side and she kisses me back with slow and lazy of her tongue, sending the last bit of my sanity reeling away.
She loosens the hold on my neck and breaks our kiss by yanking me back by the collar of my shirt. Her cheeks are slightly flushed as she tries her hardest to remain in control over the situation.

“You better pray to God that I don’t get sick!”

She climbs off of me, bites her lip and looks me up and down. I can practically see the wheels in her head turn, desperately wanting to come up with some snarky remark. After a frustrated sigh she gives me one last peck on the cheeck and leaves the room hurriedly.
What a cute, little princess.

I decide to go and check up on the others but to my surprise only spot Victoria, who’s busy browsing some stuff on her laptop. I decide to join her on the couch and we watch numerous dancing competitions, singing along at random songs that we recognize. Vic and Luna are the liveliest people in our group and you can talk and joke with them almost anytime. They keep the atmosphere up on the hardest of weeks and also endure complains from other members.
Our leader is like a big sister to us and sometimes acts as the mother figure of the household. She always knows what is going to make you feel better, be it a warm meal or just a random dance off. Her cooking skills are admirable and I’ll always love her for preparing an extra dish for me whenever the meal was heavy on rice. Seriously, how can these people shove that much rice down their throat without getting sick of it?
I poke her on the shoulder, remembering that the other girls are missing.

“Hey Vic, have you by chance seen Luna and Sulli?”

She pauses the YouTube video and smiles brightly at me. That mischievous smile usually means that she did something she’s especially proud of or that she just made fun of Luna’s height. Or both.

“I told them to get lost for a while. I know that they’ve been getting on your nerves.”

Yeah, another thing about her: Sometimes she does something for you and you don’t even have to ask her for help. She just knows.
I put an arm over her shoulder, grateful just for noticing. Now I didn’t have to endure their awkward questions about me and Krystal any- hold the up!
Did she just really say that?
There’s no way she’d know!
I take a quick glimpse at her.
Victoria remains calm, unsuspecting of the inner turmoil she’s caused. Her sly smile hasn’t wavered a bit.
I don’t think she even understands what she just said. Maybe she doesn’t know and I’m going to screw things up all on my own again. Maybe she thought that Luna and Sulli were just being overly-attached and that I needed my rest to recover completely. Yeah, that’s it.

“O, so you know why I was annoyed by them?”

Yeah, I just have to keep the questions casual.
Our leader scratches the back of her ear, like she’s assuming that she didn’t hear me right. I just raise my eyebrow, signaling that I was expecting an answer.
She furrows her eyebrows and looks baffled at my suspicious behavior.

“Of course I know, they’ve been teasing you about Soojung.”
“About what specifically have they been teasing me about?”

Wow, so much about keeping the questions casual.
Third mental note: stop speaking forever.

“Obviously about the fact that you’re together.”

I groan and burry my head in my hands.
She did know.
I breathe in deeply, mentally preparing myself for the standard procedure: Informing them of the fact that Krys will kill me if they tell anyone including the ice princess herself about the "secret".
When did my life become the plot of a bad teen movie?
I peek at her from behind my fingers but to my surprise she’s already back to clicking links on YouTube, moving her head to the beat. What the hell?

“Hey, Vic?”

She doesn’t even look away from the screen as she nods, showing me that I got acknowledged.

“Don’t you want to, like, say something?”

At that she actually looks up and flashes me an apologetic smile. Well, now it begins.

“Congratulations!”

…And that was it? No lecture, no pain inducing screams or obnoxious giggling?
What is wrong with this chick? How long did she know about us?

“… did you tell anyone about it?”
“No. I’m sure Krystal doesn’t want anyone to know.”

This is impossible.
There’s no way in hell that she came up with that on her own.

“I’m basically like your mother, Amber. I’ve known for years that you like each other.”

She takes my hand in hers and squeezes it softly, the back of my palm with her thumb.
I sigh and wonder how this is going to end.
All uninvolved f(x) members are aware of my deepest secret and could cause the end of my days with one slip of their tongue… What a great time to be alive!

Let’s stay positive, at least I got to make out with my girlfriend today.

Hi everyone :)
I'd like to apologize for the long wait... I wanted to upload this chapter much sooner but my first draft was so bad that I had to rewrite all of it^^°
Hopefully you like this one better and thank you all for commenting and subscribing :D (keep it up   ;D)
I'm always open to suggestions and critical judgement. 

The next chapter will take a bit longer to write because of school and exams. I'd say expect an update in the next seven to twelve days^^