L'inizio di una Vita
< The Beginning of a Life >

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It doesn’t come to her as a surprise when she opened her eyes to find herself inside an empty bed. She was used to it by now, a cold chill enveloping her soul every morning at six when she opened her eyes to the world again. How long has it been? She sat up slowly, glancing at the clock hanging above her on a wall and opposite her bed.

Today makes it five years…Im Yoona sighed, touching the soft material of her deep purple satin sheets with her fingertips. She leaned her head back against the headboard, letting her thoughts run away with her.

As per usual, today’s thoughts drifted to her past – five years to be exact – when her whole life changed in a single moment. She had just turned 17; a young woman born and raised from a respectable (albeit, slowly diminishing) family line, beautiful, obedient and most of all, patient. She was the only child of her ailing father and the heir to a sugar plantation she knew so little about. She was a sheltered lady, on the brink of finally seeing the world with adult eyes and yet, still in a lot of ways, a child. Yoona wasn’t ready to carry on such a heavy responsibility, much less stand alone when her father’s health finally failed him.

“I can learn quickly – I promise you, I can.”

“… I believe you, Yoona… but not as quickly, at least. Not as quickly.”

“But—”

“I don’t have much time left, my dear… I am fading…”

Her father worried, it was only natural after all. She was his only light – his memory of his late wife and everything he held dear in the world. No matter how brave or intelligent his beautiful daughter grew up to be… he could not bear to think of her alone in the world and with no one to defend her. She needed family, one who would love her as much as their family (when they were plentiful and strong and alive) always did.

And so in his deathbed, he wished for her to do one thing:

He wished to see her marry. Not just to anyone, of course… but to the son of a good friend of her father; the son of the most prestigious and powerful clan in all of the lesser Japanese-occupied land of Korea.

Yoona had only met the son of the Shim family once in her youth, and even then the impression was not pleasant. Shim Changmin was a serious man, quiet and calculating – a scholar and an accomplished aristocrat. He had a knack of saying nothing and yet speaking with his eyes in volumes at the same time.

She remembered the cold shiver that ran through her spine when she saw him again, the quiet, lanky child turned into a towering, brooding man at 20. They had shook hands in greeting, his hand calloused beneath her soft skin and she remembered wondering how his hands could have gotten that way so quickly. He was certainly a very handsome man too: broad shoulders, deep penetrating eyes, soft lips and perfect skin. It was surreal just looking at him beneath her lashes, during the dinner where their families announced to the whole of their land in Korea that they were to be wed in a month’s time. He had chewed silently, not once catching her gaze – not even when her chopsticks dropped in surprise to the news and clattered onto the floor, where he retrieved the utensils and motioned for a new pair to be brought for her. It was as if he had expected it – the decision for them to be married at such an age – and had already accepted it from the moment it was revealed. His reaction was so unlike hers, she who had clutched her heart and refused vehemently in her head, but never voiced her rejection in worry for her sick father.

“I am against this, sir, if you must know.”

“I do know. Actually, I expected as much. However, ultimately, it is not our decision.”

“Yes… I will be your wife by the end of the month.”

“And I will be your husband.”

Their wedding was a spectacle, a magnificent event, while their marriage was simply a contract between two families. It was not the most ideal circumstances she had hoped for herself – she had hoped for love and being swept off her feet, like how her mother had felt – but she had accepted her fate nonetheless. If only for her father’s happiness… if only… to keep his smile on his graying face a little while longer.

The vows were exchanged and a brief, yet enticing, kiss was shared. And voila, she was the daughter-in-law of the Shim family clan – the wife of the respectable son and the future bearer of heirs to an impressive family line. She was beautiful and patient, Im Yoona, aged 17 and Shim Changmin’s wife.

She brushed a hand over her stomach and sighed, bringing herself to the present and to her reality. Five years hand gone by and Yoona had no children, not one – not since… she shook her and head pulled herself out of bed, her feet touching the cold marble floor in almost silent trepidation as she padded towards her vanity table to get ready for the day. She inspected her face, touching her cheek gingerly before letting her eyes flit towards a frame.

“Mistress?” said the young maid in a quiet voice and hovering at her slightly opened door, “Madam Shim has inquired if you were to be joining them for breakfast today. Would you like some assistance in getting ready?”

Yoona shook her head, taking the frame into her hand and not bothering to look back. “I’ll be alright, Minyoung. You can go back to your original duties… Please tell Mother that I’ll be down in a few moments.”

The door closed shut after a light shuffle, and she was once again left inside her thoughts. With tired eyes, Yoona lifted her gaze to her reflection and blinked back unshed tears. She had stopped crying a long time ago, but there were still remnants somehow, at mornings like these when the sun was just bright enough to enter across their – her – room and warm the surroundings. She was the same person, somewhat, still the same beautiful and patient young woman from all those years ago. And today was nothing special just like the other days… there was no need to dally. No need to worry.

She looked back down at the frame she held and pursed her lips slightly.

“Five years and counting…” she whispered ruefully to herself, brushing a thumb past her cheek (there were no tears, as expected but it had become a habit).

Yoona set the frame back onto the table after a moment’s thought and sighed. Then she stood up and dressed – willing herself ready for another day—

“Happy anniversary…” Changmin.

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To those who have loved, lost, found, given up or are still waiting...
Time, like love, is eternity.

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!i IMPORTANT NOTE i!
All italicized conversations are FLASHBACKS.
Some scenes are rated PG-15 to M. They will be indicated.

Disclaimer: Story and graphics by aoza/nikatsu 2011. All rights reserved. Distribution of any kind is prohibited without the written consent of nikatsu/aoza. The following is a work of fiction. The events and characters are fictional and the celebrity names/images merely borrowed and do not represent who the celebrity is in real life. No offence is intended towards them, their families or friends. Poster Credit to Angela from Tokki Berry.

Notes: This fanfic was supposed to be a contest entry for AFF's Summer Writing Contest, but unfortunately - due to time constraints and my own miscalculations with time, I decided to not submit the fic because I just knew I wouldn't reach the deadline. However, this is something I'm actually proud of writing because I researched the timeline (it kind of actually mirrors my own country's time during the mid-1940's) and did the very best I can do make it sound as authentic as I possibly can. I do not in anyway believe that I have captured the very essence of the timeline, but this is a new genre/feel for me. I think I did a good job considering, hehe. Hopefully, it doesn't come off as too pretentious or cheesy but just right. Enjoy!

Prompt: “But I remember you, and my peace is lost.” - Christina Aguilera ‘Pero Me Acuerdo De Ti’