your love's makin me crazy

 

 

 

 

They ride around the city for a decent forty-five minutes, listening to the wind and the cars and the life inhabiting Busan, before Youngjae claims he’s been holding his bladder far too long. Although Daehyun is pretty reluctant to stop riding in fear that he will have to pedal, he gets off the handlebar and parks the bike behind a tiny gas station while Youngjae beelines for the nearest restroom.

 

His friend exits the building a few minutes later saying, “I don’t think I’ve ever had to piss that much in my life.”

 

Daehyun, with an amused smile, admits, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you run that fast in my life,” to which Youngjae shoves into him and calls him an . Before Daehyun can reply, Youngjae is on the bike and ready to roll.

 

“I’m getting kinda tired of riding, you?”

 

Daehyun tries to ignore the (unintentional) innuendo, he really does. But then the childish laughter bubbles in the back of his throat before he can stop it, and he and Youngjae look at each other, and then they’re both bowing their heads - giggling like little boys do at goofy cartoons.

 

“Shut up, Daehyun,” Youngjae blows out air, trying to calm himself enough to sound serious. But Daehyun can see the quiver of his lips and the way he wills himself to not laugh.

 

“You’re the one who said you were tired of 'riding!'” Daehyun exclaims, clearly trying to control himself from doubling over any further.

 

“You know what I meant, you ert!” The heat creeping up his neck seems to rise more as Daehyun nears, which makes Youngjae’s heart flutter.

 

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” Daehyun chuckles out the rest of his amusement, his breathy little "uhuhuhuh”s leaving Youngjae with a weird feeling in his stomach. He kicks the stand off the ground and balances the bike. Moments later Daehyun mounts the handlebar and adjusts himself so that Youngjae can see. He didn’t make me pedal this time, Daehyun thinks, relieved that the task is still in his best friend’s hands.

 

The younger boy pedals out of the parking lot of the gas station. “Do you wanna go to the park?”

 

“Sure, since you're tired of ‘riding,'" Daehyun jokes, turning to look at Youngjae from over his shoulder.

 

"Jesus," Youngjae groans aloud, craning his neck over Daehyun's shoulder. "I hate you."

 

"I love you, too, man." Daehyun chuckles. Youngjae wants to scream because the boy is so cute and the way his laughter vibrates against him is messing with his emotions and just - no.

 

Youngjae swallows back his feelings and instead forces all his weight onto the pedals to get them moving. Just as he does, Daehyun adjusts himself, placing his hands atop Youngjae's. When they reach an unexpected dip in the street, the boy grips his hands. A sharp inhale takes Youngjae by surprise, mostly because he doesn't expect it to come from his own mouth. But his best friend's hands are covering his and he's pretty sure Daehyun isn't doing it to just hold on to the handlebar - mostly because he hasn’t taken them away yet. Sure, they've held hands many times before, and this isn’t technically holding hands - but something is different about this occasion and Youngjae honestly wishes it could stay that way for the rest of their playdates.

The park is just up the road from the gas station, hidden behind tall trees and wrought-iron gates. The two practically float through the open gates, continuing down narrow, intertwining paths that all lead to the middle of the park. Youngjae weaves through these paths with ease, leaning left and right to match the curve of the concrete below them. The wind builds as they zoom past slower riders; it flows through Daehyun’s hair and smacks Youngjae in the face.

 

A wide walking trail, with its complimentary bike lane to remind everyone just how conscious the park administration is, lines the three-mile perimeter. As they break the first ring of the park, Daehyun takes note of the dog playground that lies just beyond it. Large but secluded, it currently holds a few little beasts who roll around wildly in the plush grass and fetch toy bones. “Did they have that the last time we came?” he asks even when they’re far behind it. Youngjae hums in thought. The last time they visited this area of town was months ago, but never have they noticed the presence of a dog park.

 

“I’m assuming it’s new,” Youngjae concludes a moment later but shrugs. “I’ve never noticed it until now.” Maybe the dog park has been forgotten so often because it’s been moved off to a corner of the park dedicated to loners.

 

However, the biggest section of the area, and the only attraction the boys care for at the moment, is waiting for them at the very center of the park. And, by the looks of it, it's pretty empty.

 

The boys sail down the path, their hearts beating faster with each foot travelled. They grew up playing at this playground, and - after they were allowed to go out alone during the day - designated this their impromptu hangout spot.

 

Youngjae stops pedaling, letting the wheels do the rest of the work when they come close, and before he knows it they’re slowing to a stop right in front of the slide.

 

The minute he’s steadied the bike, Daehyun’s off the handle bar running for the ladder on the other side of the equipment, shouting, “Last one to the tower pays for ice cream!” At first Youngjae’s doesn’t understand his unsteady voice, mostly because Daehyun’s accent is so thick and he’s speeding off. But when he sees Daehyun scrambling up the blue ladder on the opposite end, the bike is long forgotten on the ground, tipped over with wheels spinning slowly as Youngjae dashes up the slide.

 

“Who said we’re getting ice cream?” he shouts back, gripping onto the handle at the top of the slide to pull himself up. He has to bend back in order to get under the covering and onto the platform, and Youngjae’s reminded by the sting in his back that he’s not seven anymore and he’s outgrown this playpen.

 

But Daehyun’s already halfway up the ramp and quickly closing in on the tower, which for Youngjae is only a few platforms and a stair climb away, so the pain is also forgotten as he speeds down the path to victory. “Um, me?” He can hear Daehyun’s full-blown laughter as they scurry for the center of the attraction, “You’re so determined! But is that gonna be enough?” Youngjae pushes himself to go harder when he realizes just how close he and Daehyun both are to the tower.

 

His legs max out and his chest burns as he reaches the stairs, but Daehyun is at the top of the ramp as well. While he can’t crawl through nooks and crannies like he used to when he played here, Youngjae can easily jump and reach his destination because he’s big enough. With that in mind, he doesn’t even bother climbing the stairs because they’ll only slow him down. With a leap, the boy shoots right past them and runs straight to the edge of the tower to his left. Daehyun, right on his tail, lashes out with a desperate but amused cry. His fingers graze against Youngjae’s beanie and he yanks, but it’s not enough to slow the boy down.

 

The beanie flies off, revealing a mess of sandy brown locks flopping gently as the younger claims the victory. Youngjae releases a triumphant howl, stopping right before he reaches the rail to jump and cheer. But what he doesn’t realize is Daehyun, who was right behind him, is still right behind him. Within a split second of stopping himself and turning around, Youngjae sees and feels the force of one hundred forty pounds flying straight into him. The impact sends the wind right out of his chest and the victory yell snipped short.

 

Daehyun grips the rails to soften the crash but greatly regrets having run so fast behind him. His body still from the collision and it’s not a particularly pleasant feeling to be quite honest. With a grip on the rail, he releases a sharp breath. It takes a minute for him to gather his bearings but when he does, the realization that he’s pressed against Youngjae’s body hits him like a freight train.

 

Youngjae is now wedged between him and the rails, back bent awkwardly out of sheer force. He looks uncomfortable. From his spot against the boy’s chest, Daehyun can feel his heart thumping wildly against his cheek. Holy . “I’m - ” the younger struggles for breath and holy he sounds so hot “ - really glad this rail exists.” When Youngjae doesn’t hear a response from Daehyun, Youngjae grows worried and looks down at the boy, who seems stuck in place.

 

He’s so warm, Daehyun thinks as though he’s stuck in a spell cast only by his best friend. For a second he rests his head there, basking silently while Youngjae’s breaths even out. He doesn’t even notice that he’s clinging to the younger until he hears - “Dae?”

 

And like that - he pulls away from Youngjae’s and stutters out an apology. “Y-Yeah, same, by the way. No railing right there woulda meant - ” and, with a click of the tongue, Daehyun motions the act of being decapitated.

 

“Maybe for you, definitely not for me!” Youngjae exclaims. “Your fat would’ve cushioned my fall.”

 

“Oh ho ho!” Daehyun chuckles heartily, completely aware that he is not back to his usual snarky self because the idea of Youngjae’s body against his body with heat and racing heartbeats to complement the picture has him almost whining out of whatever emotion he’s feeling right now and it’s too much to -

 

You know what, nevermind.

 

“Who says you would top me?” Daehyun bellows. “Last I checked I ran into you, and I’m the one who did better in physics so that also means I would be the one landing on top of you!” He can’t help the snicker that slips when Youngjae’s eyes nearly bulge out of his head.

 

The younger boy stutters helplessly, astonished by such a response. “Excuse me,” he musters up seconds later, “All it takes is a simple twist for me to flip us over and crush! Besides, I would clearly top you any day!”

 

“No way you could top!” Daehyun protests, and suddenly he can’t tell if this conversation is about falling off a platform or something a lot more adult-friendly. When did things escalate to such a level? What the hell happened to his slightly-less-indecent-than-now nature?

 

“I just did!” Youngjae stomps like a child whose toy’s been taken away. His eyes search Daehyun’s face for a response before they flick downward to examine his fallen beanie. He swoops down to snatch it from the platform, silent and seemingly angry in his actions, but when he returns his gaze to Daehyun’s poor Youngjae can’t even last a few seconds with a serious expression.

 

One look at each other and each boy’s laughing.

 

“Look, damn it,” Youngjae grows serious when the commotion quiets. He raises an accusatory finger toward Daehyun even while masking a smile. “I still won the race fair and square, okay? You have to buy the ice cream. That was the deal.”

 

Daehyun snorts like he knows something Youngjae doesn’t. And, truth be told, he does know something. “Dude, you do realize I don’t even have my wallet?” . When he doesn’t receive a response from the younger brunet, Daehyun laughs again. “You were gonna have to pay anyway!” Triumphant. Rubbing it all in his face. “You ran all the way up here for nothing!” He points, mouth wide as he cackles.

 

By now, and with the addition of said news, Youngjae’s face has suffused to the wonderful shade of a beet. He mutters a “shut up,” embarrassed, then adjusts his beanie.

 

“D’aw,” Daehyun grins, “It’s okay, you don’t have to get me ice cream if you don’t wanna.”

 

Good, he thinks, I’ll just order the best kind and you won’t get any -

 

“Youngjae, stop plotting against me.”

 

“I am not!”

 

“Youngjae, stop lying, I can see those rusty gears turning in your peanut-sized brain - you’re plotting revenge.”

 

“Did you just - ?!”

 

“Yes,” he groans.

 

Youngjae opens his mouth to spit fire with his comeback, but he gives up and seals his lips shut instead. If Daehyun wanted to be a smartass, let him be.

 

Without responding, the boy turns on his heels and heads for the slide, face void of emotion. Daehyun watches in from his spot, confused, before he realizes the brunet is leaving. “Y-Yah! Where’re you going?” he stumbles on the way down from the tower. Youngjae remains silent.

 

Youngjae takes the ladder down instead of confiding in the slide, maybe because it provides a quicker route to the swings, maybe because he wants Daehyun to catch up with him and bug him because he’s totally weird like that.

 

Either way, Daehyun wastes no time in following him, calling his name multiple times over to elicit a response.

 

The younger refuses to speak, those he does enjoy hearing his best friend’s groans of annoyance whenever he can’t get an answer. “Yoooooouuuuungjaee-yaaaahhhhhhhh” comes the lazy half-whine half-moan groaning thing that he does when he desperately wants attention. Youngjae doesn’t give in. He finds it funny to hear Daehyun beg anyway. He’s always been persistent; once he went so far as to serenade Youngjae from their last class to soccer practice on the field - a plea for him to stay the night so they could carpool to a Pokemon tournament the next morning.

 

A few paces from the swings and suddenly the boy is blocking his view, smile so large it looks like it hurts his face. Youngjae stops, looking him right in the eye, before he rolls his own eyes and steps to the side. Daehyun scoffs, astonished that his eye-contact trick didn’t work. Usually Youngjae can’t resist his face, not like he can’t resist Youngjae’s but in the way that he always laughs when he’s forced to look at Daehyun’s. Well, , that came out wrong, too.

 

“Jesus,” Daehyun sighs when he sees Youngjae place his bottom on the swing. “Did I really hurt your ego that bad?” Youngjae purses his lips, letting his eyes slide over his figure for a split second before he releases a breath. “I mean, you can’t get mad at me for pointing out what I saw.” Daehyun jokes when he manages to step in front of his best friend again, “Even worse, you can’t get mad at me for speaking the truth.”

 

Youngjae snorts at that and his heart picks up. Daehyun snuggles his hands into his pockets, watching Youngjae’s skinny knees bounce as he pushes himself ever so slightly.

 

They sit like that for a few moments, Youngjae ing his legs out to push himself back and forth, Daehyun frozen in his spot with hands in his pockets. It’s not awkward, because silence between them is never awkward, but Daehyun doesn’t like that Youngjae’s so suddenly reverted to the silent treatment that he most commonly uses with his brother or his other friends. Daehyun nibbles on his lip absently as the thought of Youngjae always speaking his mind to Daehyun crosses his brain.

 

Obviously the boy is just playing with him. The way he snorted at Daehyun’s humor attempt and how he rolled his eyes when Daehyun blocked his path are both clear signs that this was just a little game of Let’s See How Long Daehyun Can Go Before He’s on His Knees in Front of Youngjae Begging to be Acknowledged. (Which was, in his opinion, a very stupid game.)

 

But, like every time Youngjae has Daehyun (almost) at his mercy, Daehyun - who believes he’s strong enough to deny his urge to please his best friend - throws in his towel. Youngjae’s always held this small bit of power of him to get what he wants. But! That’s only when Daehyun is at a disadvantage against him.

 

This is not one of those moments, obviously, because before long - Daehyun’s stomping forward and squeaking, “Stop with the silent bull, would ya?” His voice is but a whine at this point, a whine covered in honey and satoori, a whine Youngjae almost keels over into the abyss of feels. At the last minute Youngjae uses his feet to stop them from colliding, but this time he can’t hide his amusement. Daehyun’s so cute when he’s frustrated. Eyes narrowed, brow wrinkled, nose scrunched, pillow lips pressed together and twisted into a purse (and just totally kissable because why the hell not). Youngjae bends forward in his seat to hide the deep blush he knows is apparent, but Daehyun takes his embarrassment as amusement and breaks out into hearty laughter.

 

“Haha! I gotcha!” Daehyun grins.

 

“Fine,” Youngjae grumbles, nose scrunched and arms folded to display his annoyance. He looks ridiculous in this damn swing, behind barely touching the ground because it’s made accomodate tiny children. “But I’m definitely not getting you any cream of ice. Nor am I playing your stupid Final Fantasy. Nor am I sleeping over!”

 

Daehyun’s eyes bulge out of his head at the last one. He can’t be serious. “What the crap, man! I totally spent a whole week waiting for you to get back just to hang out and now you’re gonna leave me for dead because of ice cream?”

 

“No…,” he trails, pursing his lips. Like Daehyun should know this isn’t the true reason.

 

“So what is the truth?”

 

“The truth is, Oprah, you insulted me,” the younger states matter-of-factly. “You know I don’t like when you insult me. And since I’m buying the ice cream, I’ll buy your favorite kind in the largest size and you can’t have any.”

 

“That’s rude.”

 

“You’re rude,” Youngjae scrunches his nose. It’s starting to become a habit of sorts. “Now, quit standin’ there like a gnome and sit down or something, so we can watch the stars like lovers on a picnic.”

 

“Dude,” Daehyun chuckles, “It’s frickin’ four o’clock, there aren’t any stars, what’re you talking about.” He wastes no time following orders. He sits on the ground near to the empty swing adjacent to Youngjae and lies back. Youngjae, seeing that his friend has successfully placed himself, takes the pause in their conversation as a cue to kick himself into motion.

 

The brunet works his way in the air with ease, swinging his legs with every fall back from the sky. He smiles the whole time he swings, probably one of those absent smiles that appears on his (beautiful) face whenever he’s occupied. Daehyun watches with intense curiosity as the curls falling from his beanie flop about his face.

 

“You look creepy like that,” Youngjae comments, breathless it seems, but Daehyun thinks it’s just because he’s swinging fast. The smile is gone from his face within seconds, though, and is rather replaced by the sight of his lower lip caught between his teeth. Then Youngjae’s attention is set on the teal braces glued to them. He adds, kinda like an afterthought, “I can’t believe you got braces, though. Like, it’s a thing now. Daehyun...with braces.”

 

Daehyun can feel the heat rushing to his face as he stares down at the ground and covers his mouth. Suddenly the pressure becomes all too there and the hooks are digging into his lips and pain. “Y-Yeah,” he grinds out, “It’s a thing now. And the thing hurts...like hell. Junhong said they’d feel uncomfortable for the first few days, but ‘uncomfortable’ is the understatement of the century, to be honest. I wanna rip my teeth out.”

 

“That bad?” Youngjae asks, genuinely incredulous. “Junhong must be a trooper then.”

 

Daehyun gapes in mock indignation, “Then what does that make me?!”

 

Youngjae chuckles as he swings back and forth, but he never answers the question. “What is it like for you?”

 

“Weird.”

 

“Okay, well, aside from the obvious - what is it like?”

 

“Damn it, I was gonna say, ‘something you’ll probably never have to experience in your life.’”

 

“Oh my God, Dae!”

 

“Okay, I’m sorry, I’ll stop,” he chuckles from the ground. When things simmer down a bit, he goes on seriously, “To be honest, I can’t really describe it. Having braces is almost like putting on glasses. That’s something you’re familiar with.” Thankfully Youngjae doesn’t take it as an insult. “It’s just...foreign...so it feels weird. Like I’ve come to terms with the fact that I was getting braces - that I have braces. But it’s like my body hasn’t and it’s actually really funny.

 

“Like, my tongue keeps running over the braces and wants to explore, like, every inch of them, but I have to constantly remind myself to stop because it’s becoming a habit I really don’t want.” Youngjae hums. “And then there’s the little rubber band hooks, oh my God is it hell on earth - ”

 

“Like, worse than fifteen-laps-around-the-field-after-suicide-drills-as-a-means-of-conditioning ‘hell on earth’ or...?” Daehyun tries to remember the pain he experienced from conditioning as a freshman just learning soccer, but then there’s a spike in his gums and he whimpers out:

 

“Oh God, worse. Much, much worse.”

 

“Jesus,” Youngjae physically shivers and it’s actually the cutest thing ever. “How?”

 

“Because after a while you get used to conditioning, and the pain wears off quickly after every practice. But braces? The pain’s continuous. It’s literally hell - like, Satan is clawing at my gums, and I can feel it everywhere.”

 

“Daehyun, it can’t be that bad. Maybe it’s just gonna be for today.”

 

“No!” he exclaims in reply. Youngjae doesn’t know what he’s talking about, and it’s hard trying to explain to someone who’s never experienced having braces the pain that’s included in the package. He forces himself into a sitting position, pointing at Youngjae as though he’s making an accusation. “You remember when Junhong lost five pounds in a week? That was because of his braces! He said his mouth ached from the minute he got home from the orthodontist’s all the way into the next week. He literally reduced himself to a soup-and-noodle-only diet because he could not chew without crying. I’m telling you - it’s bad.”

 

“But you’re taking it very well if you’re supposed to be feeling all this pain right now.”

 

He has a point. The pain had almost been placed on the backburner ever since after he bit into Youngjae’s burger. Part of him believes it’s because Youngjae was right and he really was overreacting, but the rest of him knows it’s because he’s with Youngjae, his best friend, the one who could easily give Ibuprofen a run for its money.

 

“I dunno, maybe it’s just because I’m too busy doing other things to focus on how much it really hurts,” Daehyun settles with a murmur. Youngjae doesn’t argue with it, so they sit and bask in the sound of nature.

 

It’s definitely nice day, Youngjae thinks when he looks up at the sky and acknowledges the wind caressing his bare skin. Hot but tolerable. Maybe because he’s moving and it’s creating a little gust with each swing. Youngjae wonders how Daehyun’s doing, roasting on the cushioned surface below and gazing into the sky. Sometimes Youngjae’s eyes like to play tricks on him - make him think Daehyun’s watching him swing blissfully.

 

Birds chirp in the mass of the trees, the distant sound of cars cruising through the city can be heard even from this deep in the park. Everything’s nice and they’re together and Daehyun can’t help but feel happy with his circumstances. “Y’know,” he says absently. Youngjae hums, eyes landing on him for the nth time since he started swinging. “I’m really glad we chose to do something different.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Like, I’m glad we didn’t just do the usual video game bonanza or whatever the crap we do when we get together for our play dates.”

 

Youngjae snickers, “‘Play dates?’ Is that what these are?”

 

Daehyun shrugs, “Seriously, what else would they be?”

 

He doesn’t answer and he’s actually kinda happy about that.

 

Youngjae grows tired of swinging and Daehyun’s stomach is ready for ice cream. When he skids to a stop, Daehyun takes the opportunity to confirm what he feels has been lingering on his mind:

 

“Ice cream?”

 

“Yep.” And that’s what carries them out of the park toward the city once more. This time, because Youngjae’s a mean person or maybe Daehyun’s just lazy, the older boy is forced to push them down the roads and guide the bicycle to the parlor.

 

The sun is due to set within the next few hours, Daehyun notices. They should be getting home soon, just to beat the night. Plus, if he’s correct in his assumptions, they’re going to need a lot of time to play video games.

 

The ice cream parlor isn’t too far away, thank Jesus. Daehyun can feel the pulse of soreness in his gums and wants nothing more than some coolness to soothe the pain.

 

“Jesus, my teeth hurt!” he cries as they bring the bike to an empty stand adjacent to the door. Youngjae does him the honor of hooking it to the metal rack, and they venture through the door.

 

Inside it’s quiet and cool. There’s a faint smell of milk in the air, and the sound of machines buzzing. Youngjae leads the way to the counter, already scanning the menu for something that’ll last them the trip home. They’re greeted by a pretty cashier, who offers them the “ultimate couple’s deal,” which is a pint of chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry with any topping for the price of a cup.

 

“But…,” Youngjae chuckles nervously, flicking his gaze between Daehyun and the girl, “W-We’re not…a couple.” Oh, but he wishes they were.

 

“Y-Yeah,” Daehyun adds, like it really helps convince the girl behind the register. Just to prove his point, he steps away from Youngjae.

 

“Ah, sorry,” she blushes deep. “You two seem really close.”

 

“Yeah, he’s my best friend.” Youngjae smiles at the girl, Daehyun watches him do it, like he’s serious. His teeth ache, but he isn’t sure whether or not it’s being caused by the pain he feels emotionally or physically.

 

They aren’t a couple but he’d really like for it to be that way. Even the girl thinks they are. That says a lot about their friendship, how close they are - how easy it would be to pass as boyfriends. If Daehyun can just oust his feelings, and if Youngjae can feel the same, then they can actually make it happen.

 

But if Youngjae’s all smiles and laughs about something as serious as the future of their relationship, then he isn’t sure how effective his confession would be in taking them a level higher.

 

“We’ll take it,” he says, on impulse, but maybe not completely because of that. He likes the idea of purchasing something couples usually get, just to be able to share it with Youngjae. And for a lower price than a usual pint?

 

The cashier nods and she and her coworkers set to preparing their order. Daehyun inhales slowly, eye closed. His teeth really hurt. “Hey, if it makes you feel any better,” Youngjae’s consoling voice feels his ears. “I can’t feel my tongue from the fry burn.”

 

Daehyun opens his eyes. “‘Fry burn?’”

 

“Yeah, like, when I burned my tongue. From that one fry I ate.” Daehyun purses his lips. “Like, the only fry I got to eat thanks to you.”

 

“Okay, but, like, what the hell.”

 

“Whaddaya mean, ‘what the hell’ - you totally scarfed down all my fries,” Youngjae shoves him playfully.

 

“You said you’d share with me, though,” Daehyun’s voice sounds small.

 

“Yeah, that doesn’t invite you to inhale the entire box.”

 

“Oops.” Daehyun figures it’s behind them now, so there’s not much they can do. They share a grin. When the cashier comes back, she calls Youngjae forth to ring up his order.

 

“Are we gonna eat here or on the road?”

 

Daehyun looks around. The parlor’s mostly empty, save for that one couple in the corner of the room - also sharing what they’re about to get. It’ll be much harder to feed Youngjae ice cream, assuming he’s the one pedaling whenever they leave. He returns his gaze to Youngjae and nods. Wait, stupid, that wasn’t a yes or no question. “ - I mean, here. We can eat here.”

 

Youngjae turns to the girl, who’s already setting out straws and spoons and napkins for them. A second later, the pint comes. Daehyun literally groans when he lays eyes on the dairy goodness.

 

He doesn’t even let Youngjae get to touch it until they’re seated at the booth in the booth by the entrance. He also gets first bites, because - “y’know, braces.”

 

“Mhm, sure,” Youngjae purses his lips, looking all but convinced. “Now don’t be stingy, loser. I paid for this ice cream.”

 

Daehyun snickers as he lets the melting liquid coat his burning gums. It’s a glorious feeling, like taking a piss after holding it in for two hours, or something less weird that he’ll think of at a later moment. “But I won the race,” he smacks his lips. Youngjae only smiles at him, digging into for more. At least a dozen sprinkles land on his tongue. Daehyun watches him swallow it down with a scrunch in his nose.

 

For God knows how long it takes for them to get to the halfway point of the bin, they sit in silence. Occasionally their roaming eyes will lang on each other and one of them will laugh, probably Daehyun because he can never resist Youngjae’s precious face.

 

The boys decide to pack it up and head home. There’s a whole slew of games waiting for them, so they need to get a move on. Youngjae forces Daehyun onto the seat, commanding in the sweetest voice, “You’re pedaling, okay?” Daehyun, only mildly offended that he’s being forced into the dreaded seat again, feigns an expression of indignation but does as he’s told with the smallest of mutters. “You know why I’m doing this,” Youngjae responds with a gentle laugh. Daehyun does in fact know - it’s so he won’t eat up all the ice cream, to ensure that Youngjae will still get his share when it comes time to pry out some more ice cream later.

 

“Okay, just for that - I got dibs on the controller,” Daehyun huffs, forcing all of his weight onto the pedal to get them going.

 

-

 

“What game do you wanna play first?” Youngjae asks when they settle down in front of their options. There’s Final Fantasy XIII-2 and Portal 2. “Maybe we should start with XIII-2. I’ve been waiting to play that one forever.”

 

“Sure,” he smiled, thus beginning their quest.

 

Final Fantasy XIII-2 is an emotional rollercoaster ride for Youngjae, to say the least. He and Daehyun take turns getting through levels and timelines as smoothly as possible. Oftentimes, when it’s Youngjae’s shift and Daehyun’s preoccupied with his phone, he’ll end up hollering at the television out of frustration from the plot or from not being able to beat “that damn Aloeidai!” More often than not, because nighttime falls quickly and they need to settle down, Daehyun will have to hush him. “Just - ” Youngjae sighs like he’s defeated. “ - take this away from me.”

 

“So soon?” Daehyun sits up in his spot by the headboard. His phone has to charge, forcing him to relocated. He crawls over to Youngjae, sitting comfortably in his black papasan chair, and retrieves the controller. “I just had my turn, like, fifteen minutes ago.”

 

When the controller is out of his hands, Youngjae yawns, practically deflating into the chair. It’s a relief to have let go of the damned thing, he thinks. It probably would’ve landed out on the lawn had he not relinquished it to Daehyun. With a tired stretch, he mumbles, “I give up trying to defeat this thing. None of the paradigms are working.”

 

“Well,” Daehyun hums, clicking through menus and checking out the settings. “You’ve got all the right ones, and the monsters are good. Maybe you’re just using the right paradigms at the wrong time?” Youngjae shrugs. He listens as Daehyun sits lotus position at the foot of the bed, clearing his throat.

 

The thought to lie next to him crosses his mind. Youngjae swallows. This is the only time they really get close, and each time it happens he learns to savor the moments.

 

Daehyun guides the characters to the boss once more, and he gently slides out of the seat and onto the bed next to the boy. “I just can’t seem to get him staggered,” he says as he settles. Daehyun hums in response. He skips the cutscene and jumps right into battle.

 

The younger boy watches in mild fascination as he clicks away at the buttons, selecting which moves to perform and shifting paradigms when needed. Occasionally he’ll look up and find Daehyun scowling at the screen, working his way up to a much needed stagger. Seeing the boy deeply concentrated makes Youngjae heat up. He’s so hot, he thinks, biting at his lower lip.

“Have you been using RAV/RAV/RAV?” he says all of a sudden. Youngjae nearly jumps out of his skin from surprise and returns his focus to the television. The boss is only halfway staggered.

 

“A mix of that and COM/RAV/COM,” he admits, squinting to find the bar that shows the team’s states. “Staggering is damn near impossible if you don’t switch up. Plus its attacks knock out a decent chunk of HP. Sometimes I’ll get stuck with all Medics.”

 

Daehyun purses his lips, viciously tapping the Attack option. The ATB charger runs low as his character jumps high in the sky, slashing at the beast like the world’s ending. Though, in retrospect to the game, it kinda is.

 

It takes another three minutes for the stagger meter to reach its end, and by then Youngjae’s eyes are getting heavy. When he looks to the clock, it’s almost nine. He’s a little confused that he could be so tired so early, but then the slew of things they did today kinda explains his fatigue. He rests his head on palm-down hands, staring tiredly at the screen as Daehyun kicks .

 

It takes one more stagger and a crap ton of Attacks for the boss to finally be defeated, but when Daehyun finally gets around to it, he actually cheers aloud. “Youngjae, I did it!” But when he looks down to see if the quiet boy saw him complete the task, he sees that Youngjae’s already sinking down into the unconscious.

 

His beanie’s sliding, so he does him a favor and just slips it off. The brown locks underneath bounce out freely, falling all across his face. Daehyun wipes at the stray hairs, pushing them away to get a look at his sleeping visage. He looks so cute when he’s unconscious, maybe a little more than when he’s not. Either way, Daehyun can say that Youngjae is just all around cute.

 

As his fingers cart through soft strands of the boy’s luscious hair, Daehyun’s lips start to tingle. It’s the familiar buzz from earlier, the one he found surprisingly pleasant. His tongue darts across his lower lip. The thought to kiss him crosses his mind, but he immediately has to lock it away, because he’s unsure how Youngjae would react.

 

Still.

 

He looks to the TV. It’s still on the same image, showcasing all the battle’s statistics. Daehyun lands his gaze back on Youngjae.

 

The boy’s asleep.

 

He wouldn’t know, would he? If gravity suddenly got too strong and forced Daehyun down. If Daehyun kissed him, he wouldn’t know, right? There were so many questions and so little answers, but he’s certain that this lip-tingling thing is happening for a reason.

 

He sighs, setting the controller aside. “What if,” he mumbles as he runs a finger down Youngjae’s cheek, soft and harmless. “What if I kissed you?”

 

Youngjae doesn’t respond, as expected. He’s glad for his sake that the boy can’t hear him. Youngjae instead continues to dream whatever his subconscious provides, and Daehyun sits there wondering if he should just let it go. He probably should, just so that he doesn’t feel awkward in the morning or something.

 

A certain unmistakable wave of fatigue washes over him just as he concludes to not kiss Youngjae. Daehyun assumes this is what the boy must’ve just gone through a few minutes ago while he was busy killing off monsters and beasts. He choose to lie down as well, right next to Youngjae, so close that he can feel the heat radiating from the boy’s body.

 

Daehyun feels heat spiking at his nape at the very thought of being so close. They’ve slept like this maybe once or twice in the past, so it’s nothing new. But Daehyun still finds his whole body reacting at something as simple as lying next to his crush. He finds it silly and highly unlike him but he supposes it’s because this is love.

 

Nevertheless, Daehyun rubs at his eyes and rests his head mere inches from Youngjae’s face. He looks like an angel in close proximity, especially with the light casting over his face the way it does. The awake boy’s heart begins to speed up inside his chest.

 

He finds himself more often than not looking down at Youngjae’s rosy button lips. He could kiss him quickly, so quickly it would only be just a peck, and Youngjae probably wouldn’t know. But it wouldn’t be the same because Youngjae wouldn’t know. Daehyun wants Youngjae to know he’s being kissed. He wants to see the reactions, both immediate and long-term, to the joining of their mouths. This isn’t the way to go about achieving that, and it seems that Daehyun’s going to have to drill that into his mind.

 

He knows he’s going to fail.

 

He plans to fail.

 

Seemingly with a mind of its own, his thumb drags across the boy’s lip and digs in ever so slightly. Youngjae doesn’t budge, not now, surprisingly. Daehyun doesn’t even seem to realize what he’s doing, even as his hand finds its way around the younger’s chin. He does know what he’s thinking has about a ninety-nine point nine percent chance of occuring, now that he knows his mind and knows that he can’t deny himself the one thing he’s always wanted.

 

Daehyun’s eyes flick between the boy’s soft looking lips and back to his closed eyes. What on earth, he thinks because, yes, what on earth is he doing? Youngjae obviously doesn’t know, and Daehyun doesn’t either. All he knows is that he wants to kiss Youngjae. Badly.

 

He runs the back of his palm against the boy’s cheek gently.

 

And Youngjae startles awake, eyes flying open, inhaling sharply at the contact. “Dae?”

 

Daehyun’s eyes shoot to the size of the earth when he meets Youngjae’s gaze. His hand flees back and he wheezes. “S-, Jae, I’m - ” he freezes for some reason “ - I’m sorry.”

 

Youngjae’s eyes search the room frantically, as if he unaware of where he is. Then their gazes return to being locked with one another and realization seems to hit. “Were you trying to - ”

 

Daehyun wastes no time ousting himself and his feelings. There’s no way to escape being that close to Youngjae’s face, not even to mess with him. “Yes,” he gasps.

 

Youngjae seems to frown, and Daehyun thinks it’s the end of their friendship - his worst night manifesting before his eyes. “Oh.”

 

…

 

‘Oh?’ Daehyun swallows. What does ‘oh’ mean? “Look,” he starts, trying to get himself out of the predicament, if that’s even possible. “I didn’t - ” But it’s hard “ - I’m sorry, I don’t know what - ”

 

He’s cut off by a pair of lips. Youngjae’s lips. Soft, soft, soft lips against his.

 

It only lasts a second or two before Youngjae’s pulling away, looking just as surprised as he clearly is. It’s Youngjae’s turn to start saying, but Daehyun’s having none of it. He already gets the message. Youngjae’s confused, he’s confused, but it’s okay - they can be confused together. He surges forward before Youngjae can get a syllable out, knocking both their worlds completely off kilter.

 

At first it’s a clash of lip and teeth and bated breaths, followed by groans of either pain or relief - maybe both, neither boy knows. But they’re both certain that it’s awkward when they finally meet.

 

Daehyun’s inexperienced, he hopes Youngjae is, too, else he’s got a lot of catching up to do. But somehow they make it work. When they finally catch tongues he feels goosebumps rise on every available inch of skin on his body. It’s foreign, letting Youngjae slide past his lips, but he thinks he can taste the faintest vanilla on the boy’s tongue. He doesn’t want that taste to ever go away.

 

Youngjae breaks from him for a split second, much to his dissatisfaction, but he does it with reason. Daehyun watches him, his own lips, as he grabs hold of his shoulders and throws and leg over his body.

 

And just like that they’re on each other again.

 

The younger boy makes noises when he kisses him right, into his mouth and nibbling on his lip like he’s some sort of pro. Honestly Daehyun has no clue what he’s doing, he’s just reciprocating whenever Youngjae presses harder at his lips and imitating what he sees in the movies. He thinks it’s beautiful, though, the tiny little mewling noises he makes or the way he squeezes Daehyun’s hips with his thighs, like he’s pleased every time they part and come back together.

 

Their liplock never seems to end, and for that Daehyun is eternally grateful. But eventually he needs air. Ironically enough he’s the one who initiated the kiss, yet he’s the one who feels like the wind’s been knocked out of him. And it’s amazing. Kissing Youngjae is mindblowing, and maybe he’s just saying that because he’s never kissed anyone on the lips like this before, but it doesn’t matter because he’s never wanted to do otherwise.

 

It’s glorious. It’s breathtaking.

 

It hurts.

 

They pull away and Daehyun whines almost instantly at the pain in below his teeth. His gums are flaring up again, irritated by the action but apparent only when his mouth isn’t moving. It’s annoying, he even says so aloud (and Youngjae pecks his lips as comfort), but the only remedy seems to be their mouths making motions against one another.

 

“What was that?” Youngjae finally asks, straddling him carefully. His breaths are ragged and he looks winded.

 

Daehyun shrugs, breath just as rapid as Youngjae’s. He’s as clueless as his best friend. “Did you...like it, though?”

 

Youngjae bites his lips, exchanging some type of telepathic information that Daehyun doesn’t understand. All he understands is the smirk on his face, which usually makes things a lot clearer. “I think so?”

 

“Okay,” Daehyun looking down his torso to pinpoint Youngjae’s hands. They’re resting gently on his lower abdomen, just above the line of his jeans. He knows he probably shouldn’t have to ask but - “Do you like me?”

 

The older boy looks up at him like a child looks at Santa when making his wish. Youngjae looks down at him with a frown, like this is the stupidest question to ever exit his mouth. “That is the stupidest question to ever exit your mouth,” he says, just to confirm his thoughts, because he knows Daehyun all too well.

 

Not really. Daehyun purses his lips. “I think it’s pretty legit. I mean - just because you kiss me doesn’t mean you like me. What if you just wanted to experiment, and I’m just a mouth?”

 

“That’s so stupid, Dae,” Youngjae purses his lips but there’s a bit of a smile on his face. He lips beautiful like that. “If I wanted to experiment I would’ve just done so with my pillow.”

 

“That’s actually really creepy.” He’s totally joking, because there have been plenty of nights he’s woken up with his mouth glued to his pillow. It’s not hard to imagine whose face the pillow represented.

 

“Okay, but, you like it,” Youngjae brings their faces close, their lips even closer - damn near connected!

 

Daehyun lets out a huff of amused air and does them both a favor, pushing himself to meet Youngjae. “I do,” he says when they pull apart. His gums are tingling, like his own body is satisfied with the contact. “I think I like you, too?”

Youngjae’s smile has never sparkled quite like it does right before he says the word’s Daehyun’s always wanted to hear: “I like you, too, dummy. Just never knew how to tell you.”

 

---

 

 

i am on a roll!!!! and i am also so very sorry that this is like 2 yrs late. pls let some of my subscribers be active on aff. i hate that i'm so slow. pls don't hate me. this has been on my to-do list for centuries and i finally got out of my list writer's block to finish it. hopefully the ending isn't too abrupt. comments make me the happiest, id love to know what you think? :/