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Yujungpov/

” See that man? He was a farmer in the countryside and he fell in love with a calf that he delivered. He brought it into his room and took care of it like it was his life. His villagers thought he was a freak and sent him down here. “

I heard a voice tell me but I wasn’t sure who.
Somehow I could not turn my head to the direction from where that voice came from.
I was sure though that it was the voice of the person who was pushing the wheelchair I was sitting on.
She pushed me some more and stopped in the middle of the walkway.

” That guy was said to be very handsome before all this happened to him. He got in the military and he was traumatized. He burnt his own face with cigarette butts and sewed his shut. “

She told me all these.
Stories of everyone in the same place as us but I just couldn’t bother.
Maybe she was trying to be kind by introducing everyone but really, I don’t have any interest.
I don’t want to know. I want my Khun.
Now. I don’t need to know anyone. I just need Khun with me here.

” Sulmi! You shouldn’t bring patients everywhere like this! It’s dangerous! “

I heard another voice yell.
This time it was demanding and scary.
I sensed the woman who pushed me ran away from both me and the owner of the scary voice.
The reason was unknown to me though. Honestly though, I don’t even know why I’m here or where I am.
I’m supposed to be in the church now, I’m supposed to be marrying Khun right now.
He must be waiting for me.
What am I doing here?

” Don’t listen to what she said, it was all lies. Let’s go back to your bed, okay. “

The voice said whom I was sure was a doctor. I didn’t even nod but she pushed me into a room and left me on the wheelchair beside the bed. I tried standing up and when I did I walked out to what looked like an information counter. Maybe the people there can help me get out of here and get me to my wedding in time.

” Excuse me, I need to get to St.Joseph Church now. It’s urgent. I’m supposed to get married, you see. “

I tried to explain to them and they looked at me suprised that I asked.
Then one of ten people wearing white coats came towards me.
He held my hand and assisted me to a seat not far from where we were.

” The wedding is postponed. “

He told me with a smile.
Postponed? How could I, as the bride, not know?
He told me it was true and I trusted him.
Why hadn’t Khun called me to say anything?
Wait, why is it cancelled in the first place?

” The church had to go through some renovations suddenly. ”

He said with a face that contradicts.

I nod anyway and looked around my surroundings.
There was a guy rolling on the floor to move.
A woman who’s talking to a handheld mirror.
Another man reciting somekind of mantras.
Where in the world am I?

” Do you know your name? ”

The person asked me. I read his name tag.
It says that his name is Daniel Chae.
Why is he asking me such a question anyway.
Why wouldn’t I know my own name?

” Ofcourse I do. It’s Jung Yujung. ”

I defensively replied.
He made me felt like I was stupid or something.
He replied to me with a smile and motioned me back to the bed I was assigned to.

” Where am I? ”

I asked him before he head out to leave me.

” Why am I here? ”

I asked him again, not giving him a chance to reply to my first question.

” Where’s Khun? ”

I asked the last question.
The one that’s been playing in my mind, way too long.

” You’re in the hospital. You’re not feeling well. Nichkhun-sshi went back because the visiting hours ended. ”

He patiently answered me and I was convinced by his answer.
He tucked me in my bed and suggested for me to sleep since I looked tired.
Honestly, I am.

” Sleep well, Yujung-sshi. ”

I heard his assuring voice said and I fell asleep almost instantly.

Danielpov/

After putting her to bed, I went back to my job and assorted the papers.
I am a doctor, in a mental institute.
And Yujung is one of my patients.
She’s been here for quite some time though and she never seemed to get over what happened to her.

It’s always like this.
Day after day, it’s the same thing repeating.
It was like a sickening cycle.
She wake up lifeless till late at night.
Then she’ll come up to the doctors in duty and ask if we could send her to St.Joseph Church.
I’ll tuck her to bed every night and the next day when she wakes up, it’s the same thing all over again.
She’ll wake up lifeless and do the same thing as the day before.
It was as though she was proggramed to behave this way.

It was frustrating enough for me to see her like this.
To imagine how she feels is even scarier.
I don’t know what about her that made me like this.
This is really sincerely crazy, even from my opinion.
I fell for my own patient who is mentally challenged.
If I were to tell my mom who is proud I became a doctor, she would totally die of cardiac arrest.
And I don’t want her to die now.
I love her too much.

Don’t even ask me how this happened.
It’s as hard for me to even talk about this.
No, really.
For me to say that I’m in love with a woman who is definitely crazy is just out of the world.
I told one of my most trusted friend and even he laughed at me.
At first he thought I was kidding.
Then he panicked.
He was afraid I too was crazy or the similar.
Maybe I am. I don’t know.

I remembered the first time she came here all the way till now.
She was lifeless just as she is almost 3/4 of her whole day and she was carried into the premises in the arms of a man.
He looked so tired and as if he had enough of everything.
I believed he looked as if he would go jump down some random building after sending her here.
He looked that tired and helpless.

I was the doctor for her case.
I just took interest in her.
She looked almost dead.
Most of our patients come into the hospital in their way.
Some cartwheeling into the place.
Some jumping, some just stoically walking.
Honestly, this was the first that someone came in someone else’s arms.

After putting Yujung in her new room, I took a turn to speak to the man who brought her here.
He said his name was Jung Intae and that he was her older brother.
I asked him why he brought her in and he told me her story.

Yujung was supposed to get married to this guy named Nichkhun Horvejkul and that they’re so in love.
Had been dating for years, almost a whole decade and he had just popped the big question to her.
Both were so in love and so into each other.
On their wedding day itself, Yujung was still in her room getting ready, putting on makeup on her face.
When news was passed to her, Nichkhun was involved in an accident and he was pronounced dead at the scene.

Yujung was shocked.
She was astonished to say the least.
She kept quiet for a whole hour, not even a word from her.
Not even tears.
It was as if her souls just got out of her body and she just lost her sense of living.
It was almost as if she was the one who’s dead.

It’s been two months and this is how she acts, Jung Intae told me.
She always shuts and she suddenly wakes up from her daydreaming and asks about the wedding.
Jung Intae told me that he and his family too felt the lost and felt bad but Yujung’s condition was beyond control, they didn’t know how to help her out.
They brought her to doctors but none could help until one suggested a mental institute.

That’s how she ended here.

Her family still comes but she don’t react to them.
She looks at them as though they’re just the passing wind.
He family never gives up on the belief ghat she’ll be fine and get over Nichkhun someday.

I hope so too.

I must be crazy for falling in love with her.
But I’m glad I did.
I’m the only person who saw her as an angel.
She was perfect.
She’s so pretty.
Full lips, big eyes, she really looked like a total princess.
Only that she’s lovesick.

I know how hard it is to lost someone who you really truly love.
I saw many people suffering heartbreaks all my life.
Everywhere I see people pained because of love.
My mother was one.
My father left her for some other young woman and I saw how depressed my mother was.
I saw many others too.
But none is half as bad as what Yujung is experiencing.
It’s like she’s stuck with the worst kind of hertbreaks.
The one that makes you crazy.

Every night, when I don’t really sleep because I spent that time of the day thinking, I wonder alot.
I wonder how much did Nichkhun loved Yujung so much to make her this pained?
How much did he loved her that she could be in this state?
And while thinking of these, then I realized how insignificant my feelings for her was.
What was I thinking?

Sure, I do like her.
I believed I could love her so much, much more than she could ask for.
So much that women would swoon.
But I don’t even bother dreaming if I was able to compete to Nickhun.

Still, I do want to love her.
I want her to know that there is someone who could love her.
If she gave me a chance I would.
I think Nichkhun would be on my side if I were to really love her.
But that all doesn’t matter.
Why would it when I am such a coward?
I would never be able to tell her my feelings.
Even if I do, what could she do.
It’s not like she could love me in return.