Hey Zelo

Title: [3/5]

Comments: It should be Hey, Zelo. Not Hey Zelo. But other than that, I thought is was simple yet affective.

Story Layout: [10/10]

Comments: Having a one-shot doesn't mean you have to have a poster, but you should always have something. I thought it was perfect that you had a GIF instead of a plain picture.

Forward and Description: [4/10]

Comments: I thought the grammar mistakes really distracted me from it and also the random bolded letters make it seem unprofessional.

Plot: [20/20]

Comments: There aren't real plots in most one-shots. But this reflects on your originality.

Characterization: [5/5]

Originality: [10/10]

Comments: You never see a lot of mystery one-shots or even stories. Props to you for stepping outside the box.

Flow: [9/10]

Comments: Just a couple places here and there were off but nothing that affected my reading.

Grammar/Spelling: [5/10]

Comments: There were a lot of grammar and spelling mistakes a couple examples are...

Hey Zelo - should be "Hey, Zelo"

Is he will cry...- should be "Will he be crying?"

Also there were many spelling mistakes, just go back through and carefully re-read it.

Overall Enjoyment: [9/15]

Comments: You set the story up for a scary horror type story but I felt it was mundane and was let down.

Bonus Points: [5/5]

Total Points: [80/100]

Comments: I noticed you entered it into a writing contest, and I wish you good luck author-nim! Zelo is a fun character to write with and you used him well. I don't know how enjoyable it would have been with a different member. Thank you for letting me review your story and I hope you continue to write more one-shots in the near future!