It was the day we were shooting the episode about voting best appa and Jjong was being stupid again.  Right to the camera he said "I like Lee Minjung!"  I felt like a knife has sliced through me heart.  I kept talking and drawing and playing around with the others and Yoogeun-ah like nothing was happening.  Because I mean, how much of the heart break could I show on camera?  It was really hard though.  I could barely think of anything to say.

So later after shooting was done I went straight to our bedroom and sat down on the futon and stared into space.  I kept thinking of that time that he said that meeting me was the luckiest day of his life and hearing his voice and seeing his smile and his embarrassed laugh when he said it.  And then all these other flirtations flitted through my head making me heart squeeze tight in my chest.

"Ugh!"  I said, flopping down, face buried in the pillows.  "He is such a frustrating hyung."  All of a sudden there was a weight pressing on top of me, squishing my face into the pillows.

"Key~!"  cried Jjong's voice voice in my ear. 

"Yah!"  I shouted, muffled into the pillows, squirming and laughing, "Get off!!"  He pressed down even harder, making it impossible to move.  

"Not unless you say the magic words."  he said teasingly.

"You know I really don't like you sometimes!!"  I teased back, albeit muffledly.  I managed to turn my head enough so that I could breathe.  He laughed and rolled off of me.  I turned over, laughing as I took giant breaths.  He snuggled up against me.

"You know you love me."  he said.  I turned my head to look at him.  His lips were so close to mine, and looked so damn kissable.  I restrained myself.

"I must not have gotten the memo on that."  I teased, rolling out of his arms and scrambling away.  He scrambled after me and grabbed my foot and pulled so that I fell.  I struggled laughing my head.  "Hyung!! I shouted kicking at him, as he tickled my feet.  I was struggling so much I felt like a fish out of water, I could barely breath.  "You make me so ticklish!! Its so unfair!!"  He let go suddenly.  And, just as suddenly, his face was just over mine.  He hovered there, a strange look in his eyes.

Then the door opened and Taemin came in Jjong scurried away from me.  Taemin was apparently too tired to have noticed anything strange, because he changed abstractedly and lay down, falling asleep immediately.  I lay there for a moment, catching my breath, the image of Jjong's face so close to mine scrambling any other thought.  What was that look?  As I drifted to sleep all I could think was, what if he'd kissed me right then?  What would we be doing now?