“Sometimes I fall in love with a beautiful flower, and I wish to own it, closer to my heart. So, I pluck that flower. By that, I’m already killing what I love.”

Tiffany woke up to the sound of a heated conversation. She rubbed her eyes and grumbled, looking at the clock.

Two o’clock.

Her two housemates were talking outside of her closed door, arguing perhaps. She cupped the pillow around her head, closing her ears but that did not help. Their chatter grew louder and louder, penetrating effortlessly through the fluffy material.

What was going on?

She got to her feet and left her room.

“You can’t do this, Jessica! You’re being irrational!”

“Yuri, please, you have to listen to me.”

“No! Are you even listening to yourself?! You’re bat insane!”

“You have to believe me!”

“You can’t ask me to do that. What are you expecting me to base my belief on!?”

“Faith. In me. You must!”

“Girls!” Tiffany interrupted the two, stepping into Jessica’s room, “Jesus Christ. It’s two in the morning. What the hell is the problem? You’re making a heck of a racket in the middle of the night.”

“You can’t go to Italy. We gotta cancel the trip.”

Yuri grumbled and scoffed just as when Jessica blurted it out.

“Why?” Tiffany probed.

“This is where it goes straight pure insanity,” Yuri shook her head.

Jessica hesitated, and cupped her face in frustration.

“It’s okay,” Tiffany said, “Say what you have to say.”

“If we go… I- uh, I had… something. I don’t know. A- a vision, if you may. A premeditation.”

“You saw the future?”

“I- I don’t know, Tiffany. It’s… it’s something I can’t explain. It doesn’t even make sense… but I know, deep in my gut, something will happen. I don’t know what, nor do I know when.”

“You can’t do this! You said it yourself; it doesn’t make sense! We have planned for this, the three of us!” Yuri nagged, her disappointment could be sensed in her voice.

“Yuri,” Tiffany came to her and patted her back, “Let me speak to Jessica. Alone. Go make yourself a hot chocolate or something. Please.”

“Fine. I’m not needed here anyway,” Yuri got up and left the room swiftly, without uttering another word, shutting the door behind her.

Jessica sighed and sulked.

“You know that Yuri went through a lot of trouble to get this trip together,” Tiffany said, sitting on Jessica’s bed with her eyes straight to Jessica’s, “If you think that this trip would be premeditatedly a disaster, you have to tell me what. You have to tell me how you know. You have to justify why you’re breaking Yuri’s heart.”

Jessica leaned back and covered her face. Tears rolled down her hand.

“Jessica…”

“If we go to Italy, something bad will happen. Something… horrible; something that had scarred me.”

“What do you mean?”

“I saw our trip. I lived through it,” Jessica’s voice shivered, “We had a good time, until the next day. Everyone disappeared, including you two. What I saw… It won’t ever leave me.”

“Jessica have you ever thought that it might be just a bad dream? It doesn’t have to signify anything.”

“It was real. I felt it. Dreams are different.”

Jessica stopped and burst to tears again.

“I don’t want anything to happen to you two,” she said between her sad cries, “I- I don’t want this either… I really don’t…”

Tiffany hugged her, trying to calm her down. Jessica was shivering all over. Her skin felt so cold against Tiffany’s.

“It’s okay. It’s okay. We’re fine, see? We’re all here.”

“I… I think I’m losing my mind, Tiffany. I’m having trouble gripping on reality… I don’t even know if this is real.”

“No, Jessica. This is real. You can feel me, can’t you? I’m solid; I’m right here.”

Jessica continued sobbing quietly.

“Alright, alright. We’ll cancel the trip. We’ll cancel the trip.”

“Thank you. Thank you, Tiffany. I know this is crazy but…”

“Shhh,” Tiffany hushed her, “Don’t worry about it. Okay? We’ll get this sorted out in the morning. Now, try to get some rest.”

Jessica nodded. Tiffany brushed Jessica’s hair neatly behind her head and planted a kiss on her forehead. She tucked her into bed and quietly walked out of the room.

“Tiffany,” Jessica called out just before the latter closed the door.

“Yeah?”

“What hotel are we staying at in Italy?”

“I don’t know, Jessica. Yuri was handling that. She wanted to keep it a surprise.”

“In… in my vision, we stayed at the Relais Santa Croce. I- I don’t know…”

“Alright,” Tiffany nodded, “Rest, Jessica.”

“I’m sorry, Tiffany. I really am. I’m sorry…”

Tiffany closed the door behind her.

Jessica insisted that the lights to be left on first.

Yuri was standing at the hallway, looking at Tiffany. Her gaze was angry, hurt and confused, longing for an answer for a remedy to her pain.

“I think we should cancel it, Yuri. Jessica needs help; she’s confused. Disorientated. I think it’s the blackouts she has been having. It’s taking a toll on her. I’m taking her to the clinic to see a psychiatrist tomorrow. We’ll see what’s wrong with her.”

“…okay,” she said softly.

Tiffany saw how pained Yuri’s expression was, and judging by how well she knew her, she thought that she should say something.

“There will be another chance, Yuri,” Tiffany petted her shoulder, trying to ease the rough tides sprouting from her friend’s heart, “We’re all young. We have our entire lives ahead of us. Right now, we deal with what is most important in our hands: Jessica.”

Yuri nodded grimly. Tiffany understood that she really couldn’t be blamed for it. It was too sudden at too last a minute. She glanced at the clock and it was already near one in the morning.

“Let’s go to bed. It’s already late, Yuri. We may not be heading to Italy, but we sure are having a long day tomorrow.”

“Well, I don’t think I’m gonna get much sleep tonight,” Yuri complained while she proceeded back to her room, trying to hide her dissatisfaction.

Somewhere in her knew that what Tiffany said was right, but she was being torn apart by her other half, screaming like a little child whose most wanted wish, robbed. Be it be denied of its existence, or embraced of its animation, that singular child will emerge at times like these.

“Yuri,” Tiffany spoke quietly, interrupting her steps, “I have a question for you.”

“What is it, Tiffany?”

“Where did you plan for us to stay?”

“What, in Italy?”

“Yeah.”

“Does it matter anymore?”

“Well, let’s just say it’s out of curiosity.”

Yuri sighed.

“I booked the Relais Santa Croce.”

###

Jessica was fine, technically speaking. The doctors couldn’t identify disorders with her, or what was sparking her sudden black outs. One test after another, she went through a full screening and the results came out mint healthy. So, there wasn’t anything wrong with her, at least physically.

Psychologically, she had nothing major detected. No perks of insanity or craziness roaming around in her head. No hallucinating disorders. No spilt personalities. There wasn’t anything wrong with her to be really concerned about, but she did, however, fell into a state of depression. That was clearly diagnosed: depression and sudden confusions ever since that one night last week. She lost her appetite, her sleep, and her will to move forward. She was enveloped in her own-made bubble, impenetrable by any stimuli from the outside; like a baby in a mother’s womb. Something shook her up; now she was paranoid and numb to everything.

Tiffany stayed in the consultation room while Jessica was assisted out to the waiting halls with Yuri.

“How’s she, doctor?” Tiffany asked.

“There isn’t much to be so worried about, just that she is a little… weak, right now.”

“I see.”

“She needs the support from her friends the most. You three are housemates, right?”

“Yeah. We’re old friends. We know what to do. We’ll take care of her.”

“Good. Patients like this; they’re too weak, currently, to help themselves. They need a helping hand from someone close to them. Depression is a really nasty condition, but Jessica is still in an early stage.”

“What do you think may have triggered this, doctor? I mean, based on your experience.”

He sighed and leaned back on his chair, thinking.

“I can’t really pinpoint, Tiffany. Every individual is different; everyone is unique. No one’s ever the same.”

“Surely you have something? A hunch?”

“I can’t really base things on what I think, can I? What I do think, is that it’s a phase. You’re all young adults. Transition into the big world is not easy, so there will be hiccups along the way. But for Jessica, she will get through it. Just, in time.”

Tiffany nodded and got up, shook the doctor’s hand before leaving the room as well. When she stepped out into the waiting hall, she saw that Yuri had brought Jessica out of the suffocating claustrophobic locale and into the green external nature. It was probably better for her to be surrounded by nature’s beauty; at least it would help calm her down with the help of the swaying leaves blocking the sun and the chirps of the birds playing around in the thick manifestations of the foliage in the trees.

Tiffany quickly paid the nurse and made the next appointment, receiving Jessica’s drugs as well. She did it as swiftly as she could too; she never liked being in clinics too long. So many kinds of diseases lay dormant in these places, just waiting for the propitious moment of strike.

She then left the clinic and met up with Yuri. Questioned, Yuri pointed towards Jessica, sitting on a quaint little bench under a shady tree, bursting with the chirps of life. The air was much fresher in this part of Yume. Jessica was expressionless and sat, staring ahead into the luscious ambience; her mind wandering off. Maybe it was better to wander about than to harp on something unsolicited, but it was hard to say, wasn’t it? The mind was definitely a complicated place.

###

Jessica stared at the ceiling. She lay on her bed, with both her hands tucked behind her pillow, her legs wrapped with the blankets, and gazed at the walls. The windows were left open, and the curtains fluttered with the soft touch of the dying winter breeze. Winter had already played with its fun, now it was back to summer’s turn.

Some of the scarcely falling snow entered her room, by pure chance. It floated with the will of the wind, unable to deviate from the path already destined for it. Hence, it threaded as willed. After making a few circles in the air, it landed right next to Jessica’s pillow. Softly, it made it rest.

Jessica turned and faced the speck of snow. Thoughts flew through her mind. Thoughts flew about how things in her world were placed so strategically, and what scared her was that it was all so fragilely situated; it all came by chance. It was by pure luck that she met up with Yuri and Tiffany, many years ago. If she had just made a slightly different decision, she would never have met the two girls of her life.

Everything in her life occurred just by sheer probability. It was incalculable. It was unprecedented. It was unpredictable. Now, Jessica realized how thin a line every life rests upon; how vast the probabilities were; how her life would be so very different if she altered her decisions she made in the past, in any way.

All life clinged onto each, a thin string, concurrent with the flow of time.

Over time, the string will grow weary.

Then what? What will happen to that one life once its string had snapped?

Will it get a new string, and with that, a new set of fortuitous events waiting to happen? Will that life experience a brand new suite of adventures? A new set of friends? A new set of happiness? Or was it pure randomness; it may encounter a happy or a sad life, just from a play of cards?

What about the past life, when it was attached to the old filament? Would it be brought forward to the new string? Or, would it be forsaken? Would it be called a clean slate, by those who