CHAPTER FIFTEEN: Conversations of Truth

The sun kissed his cheek; the warmth stung in the coldness of his skin and his eyes opened as soon as the light reached his face.

There was pain all over his body.  

He sat up, muscles throbbing with every move as thoughts filled his head. It was morning, what time, he was unsure. The sun is up though, even with the chill inside the room. The fire had died down and his coat was his only source of warmth. His nose was itchy and he was sure to catch a cold soon, once again. 

 Unfortunately, the pain of his body and the coldness on his skin could not compare to the fear and disappointment slashing inside his chest. 

 Sungmin sat up, heart heavy in the emptiness of the room. He scanned the place one more time but there was no proof of Kyuhyun being there. He sighed, willing his mind not to think about any possibility. Kyuhyun was never untruthful to their meetings. Kyuhyun would always appear even uninvited, as long as Sungmin is there.

 He sniffed, noticing that he was crying. He was frightened, he did not like the emptiness he had woken up to, the barren room that had become so familiar for him.

 The place was just starting to redeem itself for him. And now, there was nothing but disappointment.

 Straightening up, he fixed his clothes and slowly, he started walking out of the room. He left the place once drowning in  pain. Now he's leaving it with fear and sadness.  His boots clacked on the wooden floor, and the echoes on the floor made him wince. It was painfully quiet.

 The questions started to rut his mind the moment he was out of the house.

 Where was Kyuhyun?

Why did he not show up?

Did something happen?

Sungmin could not think of an excuse but he was worried. He was worried that something had occur that he was unaware. Kyuhyun would not disappear all of a sudden, not with everything they both had been to. 

Going to the Cho Villa had been his option. But everyone would be looking for him and he did not want any more commotion. Hyori had always been exaggerating when it comes to him and Sungmin had enough of her lectures. He would just go straight to his room and lock up. 

He was supposed to look for Kyuhyun but he did not push the idea any further. 

What if Kyuhyun just did not want to come?

What if he had forgotten? No.  He knew him. And Sungmin trusts Kyuhyun more than anyone.

Shaking his head, he finally straightened up and finally walked away from the lonely house. It was never good news in there. It had always been disappointment.

*

Nothing. 

Sungmin was numb at the pain as he walked away from Midnight street. He walked pass the row of houses, forcing himself not to curse the tiny neighbourhood. He had admired the place, but unfortunately, it brings him nothing but resentment and abandonment.

The last turn away from the village caught him off guard. Three forms were rushing towards him in the early sun and Sungmin halted his steps. Fear pooled in his stomach.

Sungmin was familiar with the uniforms, and he was familiar with the lone man with them. His eyes were frustrated as they met Sungmin's . And right there and then, he had an idea why Kyuhyun did not come the night prior.

The young maestro looked drastic. His clothes were a mess, the buttons were out of place. His hair, even with its natural softness was sticking out in every direction there is. Sungmin hated how the panic rose inside his chest. The man clasped his shoulder painfully as soon as they were in contact. Sungmin flinched in pain.

"What happened?" Was his automatic query.

The maestro's next action surprised him. Heechul enveloped him in a bone-crushing embrace. The man was patting his crown, relief evident in his breath. Unfortunately though, this did nothing to appease Sungmin's raging heart. Instead, the fear he was feeling intensified as the two officers halted their steps and looked at him.

"You are frightening me." He muffled through his shoulder, staring at uniformed men. "What is happening, Heechul ssi?"

Heechul pushed him lightly, his eyes deep in worry  as one of the policemen stepped forward and spoke: "Young Master Sungmin Lee, a report of fraud has been raised about you. We are to accompany you to your home to discuss matters with  your family." Sungmin's heart stopped.

Heechul grunted in irritation. It was obvious that Sungmin was suddenly panicking of what was happening. He tried to deny anything but the truth was in front of everyone. They know. Everyone probably knows and the Cho family would have him arrested or fined. 

To say that he was scared was an understatement.

"Heechul ssi," He stared helplessly at the man and Heechul's squeeze on his shoulder became a little bit of an assurance.

The officers led the way and the young maestro, bless him, did not leave him alone. He walked with him, right shoulder bumping onto Sungmin's left. And despite his knees feeling like jelly, he tried his best to maintain composure.

"It was Sunmi." Heechul spoke low. They kept a safe distance from the two men as they walked. The snow on the side walks were melting and people were starting to wake up from their slumber. The line of stone houses started opening, and voices of "good morning's" could be heard. Sungmin smiled bitterly, some people are duly lucky, no complications, not much worries. 

Heechul cleared his throat and continued. "She let it slip amongst the servants about your gender and why you were forced to do so. And well, your little usher suitor learned and he told Jongwoon, and...." He sighed. "Lady Sooyoung was there and it was her who heard the truth."

 "Sooyoung."

Heechul nodded significantly.  "Donghae and Sunmi knows about you and Kyuhyun and Jongwoon too, so... the news spread fast and Princess Sooyoung was infuriated that her future husband, the gentleman of them all, swing both ways." There was a proud smirk on Heechul's face as he related the story.

Sungmin swallowed a painful lump. This was too much. This was getting harder than expected. Everyone would feel betrayed. The trust and care he had established all those years would dwindle, and it wouldn't be long that everyone would despise him. 

"And... Kyuhyun?"

He dreaded it. He did not want to ask but he had to. He wanted to know what happened to Kyuhyun. The young master was powerful but there were always those who would hold a leash around him. Kyuhyun would be able to counter his family. They would coerce him.

There was no response. He wanted to shake the answer out of Heechul but he can't and suddenly, Sungmin lost all hope.

They were at the gates of the Lee Mansion when Heechul cleared his throat and spoke: "I don't know. I haven't seen him since the commotion. Lady Hana asked for his presence in the study room and he had not left since... I'm sorry, Sungmin."

He shook his head.

It was all  he could do.

*

As expected, Hyori was furious when the officers came knocking at the Lee's doors announcing an audience with the heads of the household.

Hyori was already made up for the day but her beautiful face had turned stony as she stared at her brother.

Disappointment, anger and resentment - Sungmin saw all of it in his sister's eyes and he knew that he would never found someone to lean on inside this mansion. There was no one on his side.

The taller of the two officers cleared his thorat as soon as the audience was granted. "Please, mi lady, we would like to relate to you the message of the Cho household."

There was not choice. They need to learn what the Cho's demand and how they learned of the truth. Heechul bowed as soon as Hyori entered the receiving area. Sungmin asked for Ryeowook to accompany the maestro for a while. He wanted Heechul to be there. It was funny how he suddenly felt so attached to the lord. Heechul had always intimidated Sungmin, he figured his secret and bullied him a little. But Sungmin realise why Kyuhyun had found friendship towards the maestro.

Heechul was a good person. The mask hid more and Sungmin was grateful that there was at least one person he was certain who's on his and Kyuhyun's side.

Sunyoung appeared in the room five minutes later and Sungmin did not know if he would feel ashamed or angry at him. 

"Mi lords, mi lady," The other officer started as soon as they were seated. He nodded courteously to all of them before continuing. "It has come to our attention that you had subject fraud towards a deal you made with the head of the Cho household, Cho Younsaeng, regarding a debt."

"The debt has been paid, I reclaimed the extras consumed." Sunyoung answered dryly. Sungmin's chest tightened. He was being addressed as a payment, a thing, not a person. 

"Yes, sire. Master Younsaeng had told us that, unfortunately, you did not come to the correct terms of the payment. As you promised a chambermaid."

"And my father gave them one! Sungmin served their family for a decade!"

The taller officer nodded in agreement. "But Master Sungmin, forgive me, is a boy and has been pretending to be a woman for ten years. He was waiting Lady Ahra... we can not not remove the lascivious accusation in that."

So it has come to that terms. Sungmin swallowed a painful lump, waiting for more.

"They wanted your statement and apology. Lady Ahra denied anything bad from Master Sungmin. This is an issue of court lords and we are going to wait for the Cho's to give their conditions, which, you have to give." Sungmin was thankful that court lords do not usually demand criminal punishment. He was, for once, thankful to the selfish and loathe-worthy image protocols of elites.

"NO!"

Hyori stood up. She was furious. Her fists were balled and her eyes were blazing in anger. "We are not giving in to them. We had been submitting to their demands and we're not gonna do it again. I..."

"Hyori... calm down." Sunyoung spoke. "The most they could demand is a fine. We could pay them for any.... emotional damage we may have caused or whatsoever. We did not expect Sungmin to be a boy, and I promised them a girl. It... it was a mistake."

Sungmin was a mistake? Why was he being blamed for this? Why did he become the venom in this bite? He was being accused of something he never had a choice ever since. He balled his fist to prevent himself from acting up impulsively.

The Cho Family, particularly Younsaeng and Hana had been wronged by none other than his own father. Aside from taking Sungmin immediately, the lies he had caused the Cho's was not something that can be let slip. 

Maybe this was the reason why Hyori was forcing them out of the country. Maybe her intention was really to save Sungmin, and void him of any more pain. But it was too late. And Sungmin was too stupid and proud to deny help from his own sister. He did not want Hyori controlling him, but now,  his life is out of control. Younsaeng and Hana were angry at the Lee's for throwing a huge lie for years, and to Sunmi for conspiring with them. The head maid would be in trouble and she might be in for questioning.

 "Mi lords and mi lady," The officers stood up, nodding politely as they did so.We'll head back to the Cho Villa. We would clarify to them whatever is needed and relate them to you."

"As of now, your family is forbidden to leave the city until the matters are settled. You could call on a lawyer, but we assure you that we would not result into any more criminal cases in this issue."

They headed to the door and finally left. Their shoes echoed along the hallway and finally they were gone. And Sungmin was once again alone with his sister and father. None of them spoke as soon as the doors were closed. Their eyes avoide each other as they did so.

Sungmin's sigh was the only thing that broke the silence and when he started heading out of the room, Hyori grabbed his arm and pulled him back inside.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"They know." He stated, unable to think of something to say.

"Obviously." Hyori crossed her arms on her chest. "We should've left earlier. We could've avoided anything if you left earlier than expected. And where have you been? We did not hear from you lsat night and now you go home accompanied by officers."

He shook his head, avoided his sister's accusatory stare.  

Hyori walked around the room, obviously pissed about what's happening. Sunyoung stood up and eyed his daughter. "We need to ask them what they need. The most they could do is ask for a fine. I know Younsaeng, he wouldn't send a kid to gaol. He wouldn't."

"Are we giving in to their demands once again?"

"This would be the last time. And we could go start anew overseas."

Sungmin caught her glance and she glared. Just like that, Hyori fumed. "This is Cho Kyuhyun's fault. I told you, I told you stop seeing him and now what? He told his family about it! About you! What do you expect Sungmin? That he would just accept you, that just because he ignored both your status he could ignore your gender. This is not a fairytale, Sungmin, wake up!"

The silence that followed was defeaning. It hurt Sungmin's ears and despite his willingness to break it, he couldn't. Hyori was wrong.

She never knew Kyuhyun. She does not know anyone in the Cho Villa. Not even the servants. She was always always wrong. 

*

His room was vacant as he could remember. There was no warmth in it. After Hyori's small speech at the receiving area, Sunyoung sent them both to retire. They needed rest. 

Ryeowook knocked softly, Heechul following him as he did. It was funny how Hyori and Sunyoung completely ignored the presence of the young maestro. It was actually good, at least Sungmin didn't feel left out.

"I'll try to go back to the villa. Find Kyuhyun and see if he's doing okay or whatsoever."

Sungmin nodded. "Heechul ssi..." Heechul turned to him. "Please, please tell him I want to see him."

The maestro smiled, giving him the thumb. "You two would be fine. Kyuhyun is no quitter and he wouldn't allow anything to happen to you. Trust me."

Sungmin was in utter fear when Heechul left. There was nothing but painful drumbeats inside his chest and despite Ryeowook assuring him that it would be fine, Sungmin did not feel certain.

A knock came when he was about to doze off. Startled, he sat up straight as Ryeowook headed to the door to answer it.

Much to his surprise, it was Sunyoung who immediately wave his hand to the usher. Ryeowook bowed automatically and left the room. Sunyoung was the kind of master that did not want servants to linger in with conversations. He prefer them waiting outside the door rather than standing behind him. It was otherwise for Younsaeng.

Sungmin did not feel the need to acknowledge his father’s presence. He just stared at him and waited. He was too exhausted to talk, to fight and to reason with him. He knew he wouldn’t get his way.

“How are you?” Sungmin shrugged. “I suppose you are not well. You just recovered from a fever and now this.”

He glared at him. Sunyoung was talking as if everything was fine. Sunyoung had been very good hiding his emotions, he was so firm and composed that Sungmin never felt any connection towards him.

The master sat on the empty chair at the end of the room. He stared at the window and spoke:

“The day that I gave you away...” They were really going to speak about it? “I did not just lose a son. I also lost a friend.”

When he did not speak, his father continued, “Younsaeng and I were very good friends back in our days in the academy. Even when the drafting started, we enlisted together. It was a random selection but we were placed on the same platoon. War changes men, Sungmin. It does things to you that no one could ever imagine. When we were sent back, we lost almost all our friends. We returned to the University and entered court councils. It was the only way we could occupy ourselves with.”

Sungmin found himself listening. It was not every day that his father would relate to him something personal. Sunyoung had been distant to almost everyone. Maybe, maybe all these years, the shame of what befell him had sunk too deep that it can not be burned to be forgone.

“It was the good years and despite the war taking its toll everywhere we managed to land positions in the court, high positions.” Sunyoung sighed. “We started establishing our families and just when everything was fine, well, it was the so-called peer pressure.”

“Younsaeng was engaged to Hana then and I had just married your mother. With our new priorities, we drifted apart. And we cannot be the best of buds like we used to. Younsaeng entered the advisory and legal councils while I was promoted to the higher jury. The men I was with, they are used to merrymakings.”

“And you lost everything.” Sungmin fill in. “You lost everything... gambling.”

Sunyoung nodded. “Younsaeng loaned me, so much that he only had enough for his own budding family.”

Sunyoung smiled sadly towards Sungmin. “I thought that the debt has been forgotten, that Younsaeng would let it slip. But of course, he was establishing himself and his family in court. It was no easy task and he needed whatever he had given me back.”

“You should have. You cannot assume that people would just give and give. Sometimes, you must learn to work for yourself.” Sungmin answered, surprised at how he was taking the conversation seriously.

“Hyori was all I have, and I can’t hand her. Younsaeng asked for a waiting maid for his eldest daughter, it was all he asked but I can’t, I can’t hand her. Hyori was growing up so well and I knew back then that she would be my hope.”

“And I wasn’t?”

“Sungmin, I did not have a choice. Let me reiterate what I told you yesterday, it was not easy for me to use you as a form of currency. I knew Younsaeng would not hurt an innocent child and I planned on taking you back.”

“AFTER ten years! Oh, wait, you left me with an aunt who barely knew me and taught me how to be a girl.” Sungmin snapped. “I was forced into something I don’t know, into something... I...”

He was crying. He was crying and god how Sungmin hated that. He hated how he had become so vulnerable in front of his father. He hated how the feelings flooded inside him and escaped through his chest. The pain was unbearable.

“I never wanted! I was told that the lies had become so deep that if I try to escape I’ll end up in misery and I believed it. And despite how I try to hide it, I still end up in despair.” Sungmin was not even sure if he was making any more sense but he could not stop. He won’t. “And now... I can’t even love someone without getting in trouble.”

And that was it.

Sunyoung looked at him, eyes wide. It was insufferable. Even with Sungmin’s sobs, the walls echoed inside the room. Hyori was probably listening, or even the whole household. But he didn’t care. HIs father's eyes immediately softened, as if finally understanding. And to confirm, he said:

“You love him.”

Sungmin looked at him, cheeks soaked in his own tears.

“Cho Kyuhyun. You love the young master.”

There were no words that followed and Sungmin just watched his father walk out of his room

*

The panicked movement from the halls startled him. Sungmin sat up from his chair, hs mind was flying elsewhere, but even his thoughts did not make sense. He was suprised to see that hours had passed. He must be very exhausted, physically and emotionally.

He walked cautiously towards the door and leaned against it, allowing his ears to listen to the commotion outside.

“You cannot consent to this, father.” As expected, it was Hyori. Sungmin could clearly hear her complaints. “He started this. And, he’s one of them.”

“This maybe a chance, Hyori. Let’s just see. If not, then we’ll take Sungmin.”

“As if he wouldn’t rebel against us. He had done this thousands of time already.”

“Because we’ve been curtailing him the chance to express himself.” Sungmin’s eyes widened. Was Sunyoung reasoning out for him? “We’ve been nothing but damn dictators to him and... I’ve been the cause of Sungmin’s suffering; let me make it up to him.”

“By doing this?” The voices started to drift away, and Sungmin could hear no more. They were probably descending down the stairs.

But Sungmin couldn’t believe what he just heard. Sunyoung sided with him. For once, Sunyoung admitted his fault and Sungmin was not prepared for that. He did not know how to react and the overwhelming warmth in chest left him speechless. He was too consumed in his thoughts that he did not notice the knock on his door.

Ryeowook came in, a sad smile painted on his face as he did so.

“Young master, someone’s here to see you.” He said softly before opening the door wider, revealing an equally distraught Kyuhyun.

At the sight of the young master, Sungmin felt the overwhelming weight lift from his chest. He did not even notice the loud sigh he let out when he stood up.  Sungmin had never been too relieved in his life.

“Kyuhyun!”

His arms were around the young master’s neck as soon as the doors of his room closed. Ryeowook had escorted Kyuhyun back to him, and Kyuhyun came back. He did not leave, and Sungmin’s doubts were erased.

“Oh god, Sungmin.” Kyuhyun murmured on his crown. He could feel his hair dampen in a moment. Kyuhyun was crying. Oh dear, he was frightened as much as Sungmin was and if the firm hold he had around Sungmin’s waist was any indication, he did not know.

Sungmin held on. He just stilled in Kyuhyun’s arms, the safest place he could think of.

It seemed like an eternity, like forever had gotten better hold of their time that they did not notice how long they remained like that.

It never bothered them. It was the greatest comfort they could find in each other. Everyone had been ridding them of the assurance, and one another were their only escape.

When Kyuhyun caught his eye as they pulled apart, Sungmin was certain that he did not want to be separated from. It might have been just months, weeks, but he knew it was not about the length of time they were together, it was what was in between those times. From the first time he met Kyuhyun as a boy, to the small teasings and playful persuasions, up until the secret meetings and confessions. They were all real. What was inside him, that warmth, that familiarity, that wonderful flutter, it was real.

“I love you.” He said and it was the truest of all the words he had spoken in his life.

Kyuhyun halted and for a moment Sungmin thought he would deny it but what he got was a quick peck and a firm hug. “I do, too. I love you”

*

Apparently, Kyuhyun managed to sneak out of their home. Defending Sungmin from his parents and most especially to Sooyoung fell naught. No one believed that the young man had been an unfortunate victim of his own fate.

Ahra had been shocked but she negated anything accused of Sungmin, especially those of lascivous assault. Ahra had been on Kyuhyun’s side. Despite her own self feeling betrayed, she had always been that sweet sister to Kyuhyun, and to Sungmin.

“I... I don’t know.” Was what Sungmin answered as soon as Kyuhyun had calmed down. They were seated on the couch, hands together not willing to let go.

“They were shocked. I guess, I observe the best in the Villa.” He winked, lightening up the conversation. “The nurse maid mentioned that she suspected as well. She is a doctor after all but she also believed that you had your reasons.”

“But it’s better not to see them.... for now.”

Sungmin nodded. He looked at Kyuhyun, still not believing that he was finally there with him.

“How did you manage to go here? And who let you in?”

“Heechul helped me, as usual. I don’t know how to explain this to you, but Jongwoon and Victoria drugged them.”

“WHAT?”

Kyuhyun laughed, his voice was still low and warm; and Sungmin felt the flutter once again. The young master cannot stop him from feeling such every time.

“Kidding. Ahra was worried. Despite the betrayal, she asked me to see if you were doing fine. In fact, she didn’t want you gaoled or punished. She’s in the process of convincing the lord and lady to just fine your family.” Kyuhyun sighed. “Sooyoung is another news. And well, looks like our wedding is pushing through this weekend.”

After all this time. After all the commotion that was happening, the Cho’s were still convinced to pursue the wedding. Sungmin fisted his hands.

“I’m stalling.” Kyuhyun assured him, “I agreed to the marriage if they won’t have you gaoled and leave you be. They can’t force me into it, and well, let’s just say, them thinking about it helped me to escape.”

Sungmin smiled. It seemed to be Kyuhyun’s talent to lighten up harsh events. He always had the knack to stall, to tease, and yes, Sungmin remembered the first days he had met him. Kyuhyun was always persistent.

“And your father was kind enough to let me in.”

“What?”

The last time he understood, Sunyoung asked Sungmin to end everything with Kyuhyun. He had accused Kyuhyun of leaving him if ever the young master learned about his lies. Surely, Sunyoung had softened up to him, but that does not mean he would consent on everything, and it was just hours ago. What caused the change of heart?

“He did?”

Kyuhyun nodded. “Your sister was not very kind though. She keeps on accusing me, but I told her that it wasn’t me who forced you into this mess.”

Sungmin smiled.

“I still am not certain what to do.” Kyuhyun said quietly. “I won’t go with the wedding, but I’m running out of ways to stall.”

It was not a surprise. Kyuhyun was not someone to run away from his family, and most especially from his sister. They needed another way. And the only way was for Sungmin and his family to pay for the lies. Sooyoung would shut up with the wedding if she knew that Kyuhyun was not going anywhere.

But if Sungmin surrendered, then he would be surrendering Kyuhyun and all his feelings for him.

Surely, relationships between two men are not welcomed in society, but Sungmin had disobeyed rules that he could not even give a damn anymore. He was tired of running, or hiding, and all he wanted was to be able to be himself.

“There’s still time. I’m thinking of ways to get over this. One by one, we’ll handle this.”

“I don’t want you to marry her.” Sungmin croaked. “There must be another way.”

Kyuhyun looked at him, smiling. “Of course I wont. Don’t worry about it.”

“SUNGMIN!”

Hyori came barging in the room and both young masters stood up in alarm. Sungmin hated the fact that his sister could just go in and out of his room whenever she wishes to. The small moment he had with Kyuhyun had been curtailed once again. He frowned at her.

“Lord Younsaeng. He wanted to see you.” He gasped.

He felt the hold on his hand tightened, this time, Sungmin is with Kyuhyun. “Is he alone?” The young master interjected and Sungmin did not miss the glare she gave him.

“He came with just an usher. No ladies or officers.” Hyori sighed. “He wanted to speak with father and... with you.”

“I assume he also knows Kyuhyun is here?”

“Yes, but he does not seemed alarmed. He said he wanted to talk. But...” Hyori spoke, “I don’t trust him. Father though, asked me not to join the conversation.”

Now that was another new thing. Sungmin did not except for Hyori to be disregard in such an important conversation. His sister seemed pissed as how Sunyoung was acting towards her lately. He nodded cautiously to his sister and turned to Kyuhyun.

“Let’s go downstairs. I want to know what really is going on.”

Kyuhyun stared at him, his eyes wary but finally nodded. They both weren’t pleased with the glare Hyori threw them. She stepped out of their way, feeling betrayed and defeated with their father’s actions. But before Sungmin could walk out the door, she grabbed his arm and spoke:

“They were friends. We could expect something good but we should never disregard anything worse. If they would take you into consideration, please, just go with our initial plan.”

It was for Sungmin to leave. Hyori had asked him to go with her family. He would study in the West, and learn the art of their business and trade. Sungmin was the son of the family, he should at least inherit a position.

“The kids and Dongwoon would have permission to go to the Southern villa. I don’t want them getting caught up in whatever is happening in here. They await my pronouncement of plans.”

Sungmin shrugged, not entirely listening to her. How many times must he point out that he was tired of Hyori dictating his life? He pulled out his arm and walked away.

They were at the top of the stairs when Kyuhyun pulled him, turning him to face the young master so he could envelope him in a warm embrace.

“She wanted you to leave, doesn’t she?”

“She had proposed that before. She said that I should run away from the lies.”

“And you disapproved.”

“I didn’t want to leave. I feel like I betrayed everyone, and I still am.”

Kyuhyun held his shoulders, a firm grasp giving him assurance of something. He smiled.

“If it was me, would say yes?”

Sungmin furrowed his brows, not understanding Kyuhyun’s words. He tilted his head innocently, waiting for the young master to continue. 

His eyes widened. Kyuhyun could not be thinking about it.

“If I ask you to run away, would you say yes?”

To be continued...