Have you ever once craved to live in a world that’s different, unique and just plain new? To be able to do things that others could not and just stand out in your own little way?

To be different from others and yet they have no clue on what or who you really are?

I wished I was like you.

Normality may seem a little dull to the eyes but sometimes I wished my eyes were a little bit more sensitive and covered up.

Ever since I could remember, weird clocks had been appearing at the top of people’s heads; its’ color white and contrasting with the black border around it. Sometimes, it’ll turn red and then… nothing.

I learn the hard way that one time when my pet cat died.

I should have seen it coming. She had been sick and she had lazed around in her own basket all day, doing nothing. I remember seeing the 5 hour time limit on her and yet I couldn’t understand a thing.

But I do now.

That was how long she had left to live.

It pained me that day to know that I could have saved her and so I spent a few years of my young life trying to stop the deaths of others from happening.

Let’s just say, where there is a will, there is a way. That had been my motto in life; my mantra that I chant each single day in hopes to save an innocent person from dying.

But deaths were meant to happen naturally. It’s bound to happen. There’s no way that you can stop it.

You could never stop a man from ageing nor could you stop him from eating his favorite dish; something that might be his cause of death.

There’s just no way you can stop a natural occurrence like that. God wouldn’t allow it.

And so I stopped caring.

I saw how people withered each day into nothing. They’re smiling as they went for work but little did they realised that they only have a day left to be with whom they loved.

I’m honestly used to it.

I mean, what could I possibly say?

Excuse me sir, you only have an hour left to live. Please spend your time wisely?

Pretty sure I’ll be placed into a mental institute faster than you can say “mental”.

“Lost in your daily inner struggles again?” I heard Jongdae talking to me and I reluctantly forced myself to listen to his mumbles.

“Don’t you have better things to do, Jongdae?” Honestly, a man needed his privacy.

“Yes. It’s called studying, not lazing around with a skateboard in your hand and getting lost in your own thoughts.”

I sighed as I heard him giving me a lecture on school. Honestly, school wasn’t in my list of priorities but it sure was in Jongdae’s.

Sometimes I wondered why we were friends.

Jongdae was definitely an opposite of me. He’s smart, studious and always on the right side of the company. Me? Not so much. I mean, he’s pretty much one of the kids who thinks that skateboarders were people who did in discreet.

Please.

I may be a little stupid in terms of my studies but I am in no way a drug addict.

“Wow. Thank you for listening to me.” He gave a quick glare in my direction but I only nodded my head absent-mindedly.

Ahh.

Sweet sarcasm. Maybe that’s what brought us together; our taste in having the same ability to bring out the inner best in people.

Or it could be due to the fact that I could not in any way find a clock attached to his head.

The first time I met Jongdae in school, he had captured my attention almost immediately. Sure, he had those high cheekbones and a handsome face to go along with it but that wasn’t why I was attracted to him. Seeing him so empty with no timer had me intrigued on what the guy could possibly be.

My first guess was a vampire but then I realised he wasn’t. He was just a normal human being and yet I couldn’t figure out on when he’ll die.

Maybe it was because I was more than attracted to him; I was in love.

I mean, what’s not to love about the guy? Sure, he’s a tad annoying but he understood me like no other. I admit that I blushed whenever his face was close to mine, always checking if I had any injuries prior to skateboarding.

Yes, I was in love with Kim Jongdae and maybe that’s why God had thought it’s funny to disable me from seeing when he’ll die, just because I was afraid of losing him.

“Come on, Minseok.” Jongdae sighed deliberately. “Stop being so lost in your own dreamland.”

“I’m not lost.” I reassured the young man. “I’m just, wondering…”

“About what?”

“About you.”

Silence ensued for a moment and feeling the need to break it, I put my hands up in defeat.

“Fine, fine.” I declared. “I was thinking of… well, you know.”

“My time of death.” He whispered so softly unlike himself and I felt bad almost immediately.

Jongdae was the only person who knew, apart from my mum, that I could see such depressing things. He too knew that I wasn’t able to see his but he always reminded me to never once talk about it.

To him, life is precious and one should live each day like it was his last; but he’ll never understand. I can’t lose him, never, and maybe that’s why I refused to confide in him on the recent visions I’ve been seeing.

Each night before I go to sleep, there’s always this scene that will play in my mind.

Somewhere down the street near school, a truck driving at high speed would run over a young man; leaving him dead and motionless.

I am definitely certain that the young man is Jongdae and it’s God’s way of telling me to prepare myself in the case that I ever lose him.

God will never have his way. I will never surrender Jongdae to him; ever.

I don’t really know how I’ll do it but when the time comes, I’ll make sure that Jongdae lives.

“C-Come on! It’s nothing okay!” I tried my hardest to change the subject. “Hey look! It’s evening already. Do you want to go home?”

As if by instinct, his eyes lit up and he turned to me, smiling while he was at it. Okay, he definitely shouldn’t have done that. Curse him and his ability to make my heart flutter.

“You’re blushing!” Jongdae teased but I shook my head insistently.

The more I shook, the more painful my head got; as if snakes were leeching on it and not letting go. It got to a point where I had to support my own head, the pain indescribable and my rapid breaths didn’t help either.

That split second where I shut my eyes to force the pain out had me winced at a familiar vision; taunting me in my moment of weakness. There it was again; Jongdae getting run over by a truck.

“Minseok?!” I felt a strong pair of hands massaging my shoulders. “Are you okay?”

Strangely, his touch seemed like a cure to my suffering for the pain went away as fast as it came just now.

What was that about?

“I-I’m okay.” I managed a grin. “Let’s go home, okay? I think I need my sleep.”

“Are you not going to do your homework again?” Jongdae was definitely judging but I was used to it by now. “I’m not lending you my papers to copy tomorrow, all right?”

“Fine, fine.”

Still surprised at the random moment of pain, I walked ahead; leaving Jongdae to tail behind me. He knew that I would need my own space when I turned quiet like this and I knew he needed his.

What was the vision trying to tell me?

Was Jongdae’s time of death soon? Is there nothing I could do? Or is it God’s way of telling me that I am powerless when it comes to death?

Perhaps God was telling me a warning but I can’t in anyway think of what it could possibly be.

“Minseok!”

Hearing a familiar shout, I turned around only to face a pale Jongdae staring back at me. It took me a second to realise that he was shouting probably for me to do something but I could not make out what it was.

Maybe it’s due to the overwhelming noise that seemed to suppress my hearing abilities.

Wait.

What?

Ever so slowly, I turned my head to the right.

There it was, coming at a high speed, not stopping nor was it showing signs of slowing down.

I scoffed a little, knowing that I had interpreted my vision wrong all these while.

How stupid could I be?

Hesitantly, I brought my head to meet Jongdae’s hurrying pace but there was nothing I could do. The truck’s not stopping down. Even if I run…

Even if I run away, I’ll still be dead.

God was evil.

He knew how determined I was to keep Jongdae safe. But deaths were meant to happen anyway.

Of course. It all made sense now. I couldn’t see Jongdae’s timer because he was dear to me. I only focused on his non-existent timing that I had failed to see that the clocks for the others were missing as well.

I was dying and I knew but yet I was too engrossed in my emotions. Human habits, I guess.

“Minseok!” I heard his screams again and panic flushed his through his beautiful, pale face.

To think that I had been so insistent and determined to save Jongdae that I failed to protect my very own life.

It saddened me to know that no one would be there to hear Jongdae’s daily rants and sarcastic jokes. It pained me to know that I wouldn’t be there with him anymore.

And it hurts me to know that I’ll lose him forever, trapped in my own vulnerability of an emotion called love.

But I’ll never be able to know that Jongdae had grieved that day, mourning over my dead body as he whispered how life was unfair; how he didn’t had the time to even tell me of his feelings.

Because at the end of the day, I was dead.

And I had lost Jongdae forever.

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a/n ergh. This is my first time with a first person POV and yes i know it ;; Still, comments and criticisms are welcomed! <3