xuanmiin: There is a small section that I've put in the foreward, so read that first! ^^ 

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GA IN 

End 1997

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The form teacher, Ms. Kim, places a strange pile of white envelopes on the table. She starts calling classmates up to the front to give them a white envelope. I don’t think everyone will get one. There aren’t enough envelopes. Is there one for me? Do I even want to receive one? I don’t know. It might be letters demanding school fees.

“Ga In,” Ms. Kim reads, and I hurry to the front.

“Thank you,” I quickly bow and head back to my seat.

I look around the classroom. Everyone seems to be looking at everyone else. No one has opened the envelope to check what’s inside yet. There is a strange feeling that settles in the room. An uncomfortable feeling.

“Bring it home, and show it to your parents, okay?” Ms. Kim instructs.

No further explanations were given. The atmosphere gets even more uncomfortable. People with envelopes are sneaking looks around at others, to see who else received the white envelope.

Gyuri pokes my elbow, “What do you think this is about?”

“I don’t know.”

“Do you think we can open it?”

“I don’t know.”

“But Ms. Kim said to bring it home and show it to our parents.”

“No one has opened it yet though,” I comment as I slip my white envelope into my file.

The class is suddenly split into two—the section with white envelopes and the section without. The section without wonders why they don’t have envelopes. The section with is eaten up with curiosity over what news the envelopes bring. I can’t help my hand sometimes drifting to touch the white envelope.

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The next day in class is even tenser. Those with white envelopes know what kind of news it entails. It is the second test for admission into the gifted programme. Only the top ten percent of students get to sit for the second test.

“What is inside the white envelope?” Hara questions while we walk to class.

“The second test for the gifted programme,” I decide to answer truthfully, since they will ultimately find out.

“No wonder only the smart people got it.”

“Um.” I don’t know what I’m supposed to be saying here, “but…”

“No need to be worried, Ga Innie. I didn’t expect to get in. I went there because my parents said so.”

“Oh,” Only when there are some real results, like having to take another test, do you feel that it is important.

“When is it?”

“Three Saturdays from now. If I remember correctly.”

“Do well. And good luck,” Hara smiles so sweetly as she says it.

“You’re too nice. Thank you.”

“And if you get in, Ga Innie, go.”

I shake my head, “If I get in at all.”  

“You might. You never know. But if you get in, go for it.”

“Why?”

“Why not?”

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I messed the test up. I was told that we might not have time to finish the exam, but I didn’t expect time to be so tight. With a quarter of the paper undone and five minutes left, I spent the last five minutes just randomly guessing answers after quickly reading through the questions. It was so bad that I had to rely on luck. I didn’t even do the first part of the paper properly. Anything that I could not do, I just guessed an answer and moved on.

Say bye bye to the gifted programme.

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