I highly recommend listening to “Disturbance” while/before/after you read. It’ll help set the mood

(edit by: heartjiyong)

~~

“Jiyong-ah,” came the baritone voice from the answering machine.

The man in question froze where he stood alone in the living room, a glass of water and book in hand. His heart slammed wildly against his chest, unable to move or breathe as his ears trained to listen, everything so painfully soundless in the moments that he waited.

The silence stretched out a little longer than necessary, betraying the voice’s hesitation, and Jiyong began to doubt that it would ever continue, ever give a reason for a call he was never expecting to get in the first place.

Finally, the voice spoke again. “I… miss you.”

The glass fell to the floor with a crash, the tremor of it making contact with the tile sending water and shards all over the room. The book followed soon after because now Jiyong’s thin fingers were twisting into his hair, tears threatening to fall from his eyes as he waited.

“I was wrong to leave you,” it continued, “I was wrong for making you feel guilty.”

Why? Jiyong asked in his head, unable to tear his eyes away from the shattered glass on the floor. He dared not move in fear of cutting the pale skin of his bare feet, but mostly because he was paralyzed in place, unable to believe what he was hearing. Why now?

“I did not realize what I had lost. It was like I couldn’t breathe, Ji,” the voice broke a little, so unhappy, so damn miserable, and it broke Jiyong’s heart along with it. It was not supposed to be like this—he was supposed to be happy after he left, supposed to find someone else, someone wholesome, unsoiled. “I couldn’t breathe without you there and it hurt so much, waking up every morning without you lying there beside me, without your perfect smile and eyes and hair and body, oh god… what am I even saying?”

Jiyong crouched where he stood, biting his lip; he rests his head between his knees and hugged himself, the tears spilling onto his white denim-clad legs.

He suddenly recalled those long nights when he woke up gasping for air, searching for something,someone, beside him that was not there. He tried to replace him, had tried so hard, had fallen into countless arms in search for comfort, but… none of them were him—none of them were Choi Seunghyun.

“I love you, Ji,” Seunghyun whispered into the phone, voice so wrought with emotion, it ripped a wretched sob from Jiyong as he cried inaudibly where he crouched. “Are you even listening? I don’t deserve for you to listen, but… I love you and I can’t say it enough. I love you, I love you, I love you.”

Unable to speak any longer, Seunghyun shut the phone, letting his arm fall slack at his side as he stared at Jiyong’s door, so familiar yet so different at the same time. He felt like a stranger, standing so close and hesitant at the doorstep. He wanted to knock and say something, anything, and pull Jiyong into his arms, kissing the younger man until they both could not breathe. Not like he was able to do it now anyway, not with his breath caught in his throat and constricting his airways like this.

He raised a tentative fist to the door, but unable to go through with his initial plan, he let it fall against the wood with a muted thud. His fingers clenched the phone in his other hand, shoving it harshly into his pocket as he cursed at himself.

“You stupid, stupid moron!” Seunghyun growled in frustration to himself, and with his eyes clamped so tightly shut, the only memory he could recall at the moment was the heartbroken expression on Jiyong’s face when he turned around and left. He must have been a real fool, thinking that he could live without the love of his life, the man who made his heart whole with just a glance.

And now, thinking back to how he tore Jiyong’s heart so easily, he could not imagine knocking on the door now. He already made the pathetic phone call—who knows if Jiyong would ever hear it?

Suddenly, his phone began ringing, vibrating loudly in his pocket. Slowly, he pulled it out, the familiar ringtone he had set for Jiyong making his heart throb painfully in his chest. He made to open it but the ringing stopped just as suddenly as it started, washing him once again in dead silence, the only audible thing the early morning traffic and the wind blowing, threatening rainfall.

It was then Seunghyun heard the sound of stumbling inside Jiyong’s apartment, and he moved away slightly from the door, eyes wide in shock. The door burst open, and Seunghyun let his eyes gaze at the man he had not seen in the months following their separation.

Jiyong looked thin, well, thinner, face a little hollowed compared to how he used to be. His eyes were lined darkly with khol, smudged from the tears that ran down his cheeks. His hair was still bright pink, the roots darkened with time. His skin was paler, trembling rosy lips standing out next to the flushed cheeks.

He was perfect.

“S-Seunghyun,” breathed the man in front of him with a small gasp, his expression a mix between relief and hurt. The older man gave no more room for thought, pulling the other for a bone-crushing hug, compressing Jiyong tightly against his chest.

“Ji,” Seunghyun whispered, deeply breathing in the sweet, smoky smell of his lover. “Ji, Ji, Ji… please, take me back. Please.” He would never beg, not for anyone, not ever, but Jiyong was different, always had been, always will be.

When Jiyong’s long, shaky fingers trail up Seunghyun’s back to return the vise-like hug, the couple knew they were home again.

I love you.

Those three simple words meant so much.

~~

In this AU,  Jiyong works at a department store in Seoul, but he had a past of ion when he was younger. Right out of high school had was kicked out of his home for being homoual and needed the money, so when he came to the big city, he got caught up in the red-light district. Eventually he was able to quit his job and settle down. A couple years later he meets Seunghyun, who is the rich heir to a travel company in Korea. He takes a liking to Jiyong and romances him; of course Jiyong plays hard to get, but eventually gives in. When they’ve been together long enough and are deeply invested emotionally, Jiyong reveals his past. Seunghyun’s first reaction is revulsion and anger, and after much contemplation, he decides he cannot accept this side of Jiyong because he’d been raised in a pristine society and cannot digest why Jiyong would do such things.

Which leads us to this drabble.

I will probably never write this one shot, or maybe one day I will, we’ll see. I am, however, open to requests if people want drabbles of certain moments of their lives (I have the whole thing planned out in my head, you see). Just request a Disturbance!AU fic in my request box.