The moon.

 It’s full moon tonight. I almost forgot, and I didn’t take the potion. I should better- 

~

The pain. It’s excruciating. And it’s too much. I think it’s due to the pain that I can’t think too clearly. Or maybe it’s some other reason.  I can’t really tell. One thing’s weird though. I feel…I feel as if I live another life too, something different than what I am now, something not so wild and violent; something under control. Something is tugging at the back of my brain. I’m trying to remember, really I am.  I really focus but, somehow, I can’t remember anything.  There is just this lingering feeling that there’s something. What, I can’t figure it out.

After some time, I get used to the pain. It just fades into the background and I start feeling good about myself. I’m strong, really strong. And fast. I can outrun any creature, I’m sure. My four legs are lean and full of muscles. When I gallop, my feet hit the ground hard, and the dirt goes flying in the air, and I thunder across to anywhere my heart pleases. Adrenaline pumps through my veins all the times, I can do anything I want. I can go anywhere I like. I can make anyone I want, beg for mercy.

I feel infinite.

My teeth are sharp, and my appetite large. And tonight, I can almost feel my razor sharp teeth itching to bury themselves in soft, sweet smelling flesh. But, I won’t just bite yet. I am hungry and craving, yes, but tonight, I am in mood for a special treat. I will roam the area, until I find a scent, which captivates me.

Captivation.

That is what I have been searching for desperately, since forever. Sure, I do bite, but that is just to satisfy my appetite. I have not yet found what I am looking for. No scent has me mesmerized as of yet. I want to bite such a person, whose scent hypnotizes me; I want that person to make me stop and think before I bite him.  I want to regret biting him, before and after both. I want that when I attack him, and ready him for sinking my teeth into him, I want  to hesitate, I want him to realize that I don’t want to do this but simultaneously I’ve been waiting for this moment all my life.

I want all this.

But I haven’t found it yet. And tonight, I won’t rest until I do.

I start running. My feet thunder against the ground, yet I still move as stealthily as a zephyr. This is handy when it comes to catching prey. I just sneak up on them, and they don’t get to know, until it’s too late. But however, with this special prey of mine, I plan to make a grand entrance. I’ll want him to know that I’m coming for him. I want him to feel the fear.

It’s cold, yet I don’t care. Wind is blowing through the hair all over my body. It feels good, in fact. If anything, it makes me get more hyped up for tonight. I really-

Sehun.

I just remembered this. This is what I am called. I think. Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe not. I don’t really know. This single word just sprung up in my mind, telling me it’s my name. I think it has something to do with that alternate life thing I feel sometimes. Maybe. I can’t be too sure.

I run for a long time. My steps are in sync to my heartbeat, it’ almost like I’m running to a rhythm.

Thud(bam)- thud(bam)- thud(bam).

I avoid the bright lights. They mean danger. I hide myself whenever I see bright lights. Because whenever I’ve been near them, men with long shiny tubes in their hands come after me.

These tubes are curious things. Every minute or so, the tubes would move a little in the men’s arms, then I would hear a loud sound and then something small would hit the ground around me. It once hit me too. It hurt a lot. I started to bleed. I had wanted to snap back at the one who had hurt me, but I thought better, picked up pace and vanished.

How these tubes hurt me, just by making a sound, I haven’t been able to understand ever since. But then again, maybe I’m not meant to understand everything.

I am cautious today. Instead of staying in the general area of the lights, and hiding, I play it safe and go to the forest. It is my big night tonight. I need to be completely ready for it, unharmed and fresh.

I see a stream running by. I stop for a drink as I am thirsty. I bend over and start drinking the water. When I’ve drank to my full, I pull my head back a little and wait for the water to calm down, so that I can look at my reflection. Once it becomes serene, I stare for a while at myself.

Big brown eyes stare back at me. They are the only things clearly visible on my hair covered face, other than my sharp canines. I stare and the eyes stare back at me. I feel something heavy in my heart. I wonder what it is. Soon, a drop of liquid appears in my eyes and drops down into the stream, disrupting the peaceful surface of the water.

I pull back and sit down in surprise. How did that liquid appear in my eye? This has never happened to me before so I am curious. I put my front paw into the stream to search for that drop that fell from my eye. I can’t find it. The flowing stream must have swept it away. I am disappointed though, because it was my possession, it was the first time I had seen it, yet I lost it.

No time to think about lost possessions. I have my captivation to search for. I continue my journey. Somehow, I know I have tonight’s time to find it. Because something in the back of my mind tells me that once this night ends, I won’t be able to search for it anymore.

I start running again.

The moon is following me. It is like this big white orb, suspended in the sky, and it follows me everywhere. When I hunt, or rest, or sleep, or just sit somewhere, it’s always there, looking at me. I’m glad it is, because it would be too dark without it, to see my path.

I’m thinking about the world, and what a curious place it, that I finally smell it.

The scent I have been searching for my entire life.

It’s impossible to explain it. Because it is too beautiful for words. It is faint yet I smell it. I keep sniffing because I’m afraid that if I stop smelling it even for a second, I will lose it. And I can’t afford to do that.

I follow the scent. As I move closer to the owner, it becomes stronger and I become more excited. I wonder whether the owner knows what’s about to happen to him.  I wonder whether he knew in the morning that I will come for him. I wonder if he knows how his scent captivates me.

When I was close enough to him, I had to stop to compose myself. I inhaled deeply and nearly passed out from the sheer beauty of the scent. I just stood there, staring at the direction of my captivation, the owner of that hypnotizing scent. I still haven’t seen who it is, but I think that hardly matters.

Enough rest. Enough pulling myself together. I have waited my entire life for this moment; I think I deserve to be a little unhinged. Ok, maybe I’m quite a bit more than a ‘little unhinged’ but I think it’s my right.

I finally arrive to its owner.

Lots of humans are sitting there, with a huge fire in their centre. They are singing, and are holding sticks with something white attached to their ends, which they hold over the fire for some time and then eat it. There are also some huge clothes, propped up on sticks. I think that is where the humans are staying. They are singing songs and clapping their hands.

This is just too perfect.

The owner of the scent, my victim, he has his back to the cluster of trees I’m hidden in and is sitting very close to where I am. I can easily take him without gaining the attention of the other humans, but where is the fun in that? I promised myself a grand entrance, and a grand entrance it shall be.

I don’t reveal myself just yet, I just softly start growling. The humans sitting nearest to my hiding place stop singing. They look at each other nervously but don’t dare look back in fear of what they might see. I see them informing the other people who are further away. Soon everyone stops singing. The only sounds in the air are the soft growls coming from deep within my throat. I can almost taste their fear. But they are confused, I can see that. They are wondering why nothing is attacking them yet.

Well, I guess it’s time to finish their confusion.

I stop growling and snarl as loudly as I can, before jumping out the trees and right in the mid of their circle. That is when utter chaos happens. The humans jump over and start running in the opposite direction as me. I howl once or twice for good measure, just so they are sure what I am.

I think they understand, because they start shouting to each other once I finish howling for the second time.

‘JESUS CHRIST! IT’S A ING WEREWOLF!! I THOUGHT THEY DIDN’T EXIST!’

‘JUST RUN! IT’S NO TIME TO PONDER OVER THE EXISTANCE OF MYTHICAL CREATURES!!’

I don’t understand what these strange sounding sounds mean, but I was satisfied by the panic in their voices and I thought I should quote them, just to let you know what they were talking about.

When I was done with my ‘grand entrance’, I went for my victim. He had managed to cover quite some distance while I was scaring the others. I was impressed. But he still couldn’t outrun me, the fastest creature ever created.

When I caught up with him, he was already starting to tire. He saw me and tried to pick up his pace. I considered letting him run for some more time, but then decided otherwise. I need his strength for the struggle against me. What fun is a biting, without a struggle?

I jumped on him. He fell down, trapped under my heavy body. I could feel him squirming under me, trying to free himself bit of course, that is impossible. Then he started screaming. I let him. I just breathed into his wonderful scent. At such a small distance, it was overwhelming. My mind was reeling and it was hard for me to think straight.

After a moment, I pulled myself together. 

Someone will find me, sooner or later, due to his continuous screams, and then they will hurt me with the silver tubes and I won’t be able to enjoy my reward. I need to take him someplace, where no one will find me. Or him. I need to enjoy every moment of tonight.

I picked him up in my mouth, careful not to bite him. My teeth barely touched him, just enough to hold him in place, to prevent him from slipping. He quietened down, when I picked him up, and I could feel him trembling. I guess he had resigned to his fate.

I took him to the most beautiful place I know. To a cavern I’ve been going to as long as I can remember. The cavern had holes in its roof so moonlight would pass through. The entire place was dark except the moonlight, shining like spotlights. Somehow, whenever I came here, it was always full moon. In fact, it is always full moon whenever I wake. Curious.

I ran all the way to the cavern, impatient to get there. Once there, I lay my victim down under one of the many holes of the cavern roof, so that he was under the moonlight. He made no attempt to get up or run. He just lay there, looking at me with extreme fear in his eyes. I looked at him properly for the first time.

He had brown hair, brushed over his forehead, a little messy due to the air when I was running. He had big eyes, a button nose and pink lips. His skin was the softest I had ever seen and I couldn’t wait to bite.

I do not know what humans consider beauty, yet I found my victim mesmerizingly beautiful.

He kept looking at me, with his doe eyes, blinking his large eyelashes, wondering why I hadn’t torn him to pieces yet. Somehow, he reminded me of the occasional deers I hunt, with his huge eyes and hesitating manner.

I lay him down, and made my way into the shadows of the cave, so that I could watch him properly without freaking him out. He watched me retreat. As soon as I had settled in the darkness, he sat up and pulled out a small box from his pocket. He touched his finger to the box a few times and then put it to his ear. He started talking and then the strangest thing happened.

I could understand what he was saying.

I can’t understand what the humans mean when they make those weird sounding noises, but I understood my victim perfectly. He was talking into the box, ‘Yeah, it’s me Luhan. It has brought me to some weird place, it’s sort of a cave, with holes. No, it didn’t bite me, I don’t know why. It just brought me here and now I don’t know where he has gone. I think he’s hiding in the shadows. I’M SERIOUS DAMMIT!!’ he suddenly shouted and I got surprised. Then he took a deep breathe and continued, ‘Please Duizhang, find me before he bites me…or worse. I can’t really tell where I am, he ran too fast. P-please I beg you.’ And then drops of liquids started falling from his eyes, and I remembered how that had happened to me too at the stream. Except, that his drops were more in quantity than mine.

He put the box on the ground near him, and wrapped his arms around his legs, and slowly rocked back and forth.

Regret.

I feel regret. But that’s good, because that means, my fantasy is being fulfilled. I wanted to regret biting him.

I watched him for a long time. He kept looking at the box repeatedly, but I think he wasn’t seeing what he wanted to, because he would just look away disappointed, and then look in the shadows, in the general area of my position apprehensively.

After some time, he looked at the box again. Then he stood up. I got ready too, incase he tried to run away. He threw the box at the wall of the cave and shouted, ‘ YOU, KRIS! I AM ABOUT TO DIE HERE AND YOU DON’T GIVE A RAT’S LOAD ABOUT WHAT HAPPENS TO ME!! YOU’RE PROBABLY SITTING WITH THOSE AND LAUGHING ABOUT HOW I MAKE UP WILD STORIES!! IT’S TRUE YOU BASTARD, ITS TRUE! A WOLF IS GOING TO BITE ME AND IF HE DOES, I WON’T REST UNTIL I HUNT YOU DOWN, AND PUT YOU THROUGH WHAT I’M GOING!!’ then those drops started falling again. He walked to the cave wall and punched it, and then doubled over in pain. He examined his hand, it was covered in blood. Then he sat down, and cradled the broken box he threw earlier, in his hand.

All the time, the drops continued falling from his eyes.

Finally, he curled and fell asleep.

Finally.

I know I had originally planned to bite him while watching the fear in his eyes, but I just didn’t find it in myself to do so. So I had decided to bite him when he’ s asleep. And now, he finally was.

I walked up to him slowly. I bent down near his face. The hair on my face touched his face and he moved a little, so I backed off.

I have to do it quick, because if I don’t I might not do it at all.

‘I’m sorry,’ I said. I don’t know whether he understood me, or even heard me.

Then I held his arm between my teeth.

And I closed my jaw.

I think I heard screaming.

Please comment. I need encouragement and critisism. ^^