❝chapter thirty-four;
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                                   "I'M JUST TIRED OF TRYING. THAT'S ALL."

She's back.

I heard the door open and Aunt May saying her name. That's when I knew. Suzy is back. Last night was a mistake. I know I shouldn't have left her there alone. I was wrong...but it's alright. I know she won't be angry. That's just how she is...she's Suzy. Even during those times that I yelled at her or when I told her nasty things, she never got mad. That's how I know she won't be furious now.

I went out to face her. I don't know why but I just want to see her. Maybe I just want to know if she's okay. Maybe yes...maybe not. Probably not.

The moment I stepped out of the room, is the moment she made her way towards the halls. I looked at her and she did the same. I looked at her from head to feet trying to search serious injuries she might have gotten but fortunately aside from her limping foot, I couldn't spot any more. She also had this bandage on her bad ankle so it seemed like she's been treated.

I was about to say something but then she just walked past me without even talking to me or saying hello. She just went past me. I don't know but it made me feel bad. Was she ignoring me? 

Even when I didn't respond whenever she called me, she never ignored me. Not even once. Yes it gets into my nerves but now that she's not talking...it feels cold.

"Ya Choi Suzy." I called her wanting her to look at me.

She stopped but she didn't turn around. I bit my lip. Why do I feel bad with her ignoring me? Isn't this what I had always wanted? Her not bothering me and leaving me alone? Then why do I feel as if I have done something so wrong that she's upset with me---no, wait. I actually HAVE done something that would upset her. B-but she couldn't be that upset right?

"Choi Suzy." I tried calling her again.

"Wae?" she blankly answered. I was at a loss for words. I don't know what to answer her. I just--I just want her to stop ignoring me. That's why I called her.

"Are you, ignoring me?" I asked her. Trying to maintain that dominant tone which I had always used when I'm talking to her. I crossed my arms and faced her but she still had her back on me. "Ya. I'm asking you if you're ignoring me right now?" I tried raising my voice a little bit.

I saw her inhale deeply.

"Eo. Maja [Yes. You're right]" she answered so emotionlessly that I furrowed my eyebrows. What did she just say? She's admitting that she's ignoring me? Waah. What does she think she's doing? I am the big sister here. She had always acknowledged my dominance. She had always respected me. SHe never talked back. So why is she acting this way now?

"Waah. So you're talking back now huh?" I said. "Is that how you'll get me to be your big sister again? Is this the method you're talking about? EO?!" I raised my voice.

Suzy calmly turned around and looked at me with those blank eyes. She looks tired that a surge of conscience went through me. Yeah. That's right. I still have a conscience.

"It's nice."

"Mwo?"

"Do you really think you have the right to say those words to me eo?" she calmy told me. Her eyes seem to be really tired and blank that it's scaring me.

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