Sehun walked to the bridge out of the Manor bounds towards the school itself. Something he liked to do back in the day when he found himself in need of fresh air to clear his mind. It’s with the full moon lighting his way that he is guided through memory. He somehow remembers a faint creak on the old wood that used to cry when he stepped on certain planks. They were no longer there. Just like everything that is the Manor and his old friends, EXO, everything had seemed to have moved forward leaving him behind a hundred years back.

    There was a sudden howling of the wind waking him to stead and he realized that at the very least there is one thing unchanged in this new world. The wind. There it is, still swaying chilled and refreshing and pronounced as he walks in the crisp of the night.  He closes his eyes to relish the only thing that seemed familiar. The wind that clung to him whipping as alive as it had always been, as he still remembers. Until he looks up and opens his eyes to see nothing but tall, white-walled cement buildings standing in rows of each other right in front of him. To Sehun, it might’ve just been last week since he walked the same bridge with Kai and Lu Han and now he swallows in fear that he didn’t have the two to hold onto to set him grounded this time around. He is brought  back to reality, the reality of a new and unknown world. He was scared to say the least.

    It was just once a small building, an extension of the lab on the foot of the mountain where they rested after the grueling days they spent on the laboratory and in search parties. It was a haven close enough to house them when they’re tired equipped with the basic necessities to sustain them. But more than anything, it was built alongside the site of the portal for easier connection.

    They needed something close to both the portal and the laboratory that they chose to build something to house all of them for the mean time. That’s what it had been once. Now, Sehun couldn’t even recognize what had happened with the actual building itself. He knows it should be about 100 feet from him. But all he saw was a lone lit pathway that weaved through the towering buildings. The sight had been disorienting, it dizzied the boy. It’s almost like walking in to another time and space which he literally did and was just too spoiled in the unexpected familiarities back in the Manor that the rest of EXO had been trying to uphold.

    He gasped, taking a step back to stop and look else where because this had all become too much for him. Sehun had to turn to the railing to steady himself when he caught sight of something else that hadn’t changed at all. The lake and the mountains that surrounded it. Sehun basked in the trickle of familiar delight and the memories that came along with it. He grabbed hold of the memory to the point of obsession. In dire need of something to ground him, something to make him feel alive breaking him in to this new reality.

    And that’s when a smile slowly crept on his face and the once whitened cheeks started to heat again as he remembered swimming in the water with Lu Han a long time ago. He had lost a bet or rather he was dared to jump in the cold water in the middle of the stark of winter in the very dead of the night with nothing else but his birthday suit. It took a lot of teasing and taunting from Lu Han at the time for him to obliged and he could still remember the feeling he had. He was embarrassed to say the least as he slowly walked into the water turning his body away from the other and hiding his face behind his palms avoiding the judging looks that might have come from Lu Han. But he was suddenly stopped when the laughing and teasing halted. He slowly looks up at his friend, sliding his own hands down his face and he finds him with an awkward yet serene look of awe. He gasped to himself when suddenly Lu Han caught his eyes and without breaking contact, he slipped off of his own clothes and walked slowly towards Sehun. 

    That was the night he finally learned everything about his beloved. As he caressed every dip and curve of Lu Han’s body with his hands and lips memorizing and learning the little things that made the other blush, smile, and even moan. He never knew Lu Han could be any more perfect until he was engulfed fully in to everything that is Lu Han. The satisfaction in the other’s face, the want and need it contracted to every sway and , kiss and tug between each other, everything that is Sehun and Lu Han had finally been laid out displayed for nobody else but the moon, the wind, and the lake. It was as if the world had stopped spinning and time had halted just for the two to share their sweet love for one another.

    Sehun stares into the slow dancing of the ripples and he is grounded with that memory. Nothing, not even a new world or a different time can change that once upon a beautiful night.

“It’s been a hundred years since you had left for the vortex.” He started to remember Suho’s soothing voice. There was a crack in there somewhere but the leader hid his nervousness and anxiety and tried so hard to be strong for the other. He could only do the same to return the favor.

    After he walked out of dinner, he was soon followed by the leader who had much to say to him. He replayed every single detail he was told in his little meeting with Suho. The leader started with the fact that a hundred years had already passed. Current events was more his thing and he quickly updated him about the war and all the most recent updates about plans, advancements and momentous parts and such. Sehun tried to wrap his head around the whole scenario but all that lingered in his brain is that so much time had passed. It was merely minutes to him, an hour at the very most as he had deduced since he perused the idea he came across with in the vortex, to quantify it by replaying the memories of his friends, the only thing he knew well. 

    But as much as he trusted the leader, he still couldn’t believe it’s been that long since he left. He stopped to look at the moon, the landscape in front of him, the lake, mountains and tree line that is scattered with no end. And he tries to find that ground again. He somehow had lost grip of it and he’s back to feeling anxious and disoriented. He settled his elbows on the railing and leaned over to watch the only thing that is still familiar to him hoping it comes back. Hoping that Suho and everybody else don’t see how lost and flustered he is without anything to hold him up. Yet he can’t pull himself off the whole new world that he had seen at the very end of the bridge. The vision of the lone pathway and the tall buildings, even the Manor and everyone else that looks the same but seems to have changed, he can’t grasped anything at the moment.

    He shook his head and willed himself to walk away and maybe try again tomorrow but a movement from the corner of his eyes caught his attention. Like a blurry vision or ghostly apparition, he caught sight of a boy practicing in the far end of the training field that borders the lake and new set of building.

Wielding his sword gracefully in the air and moving with precision,  it was the honey golden hair that seemed to reflect the moon’s light, that caught his attention the most. He went back to settling his elbow on the rail once again and this time watched as he tried so hard to make something of the mirage in front of him. He pressed his lips tight as he followed the boy with golden locks and unmistakable stature as he danced with his sword left and right grunting with force as he tried his hardest to fight off whatever apparition he had of his own. Sehun willed himself to stay put and just relish the moment. He tried not to blink in the fear that the image might disappear into thin air and he will never see him again. So he settled on his the very spot unmoved. Everything about this ghostly figure reminded him of Lu Han. No. To Sehun, this boy could be Lu Han. It is Lu Han. It didn’t matter what it was, a delusion, hallucination, mirage, a dream, or a ghost, it could only be his Lu Han.

“It’s been a hundred years since you had left for the vortex.” Suho’s voice rings in his ears like loud shouts of plea for him to finally stop. Stuttered steps and heavy legs, he found himself unable to move because Sehun is not insane. He hasn’t lost his mind. He remembers the bit about a hundred years passing since he left. Sneaking a peek to remember the tall building that still stood on the end of the bridge.  He sighs, because he knows better.  

“It’s not real. He’s not Lu Han.” He chants to himself like a mantra. He stares narrowing his eyes on the golden blond hair and the small built. “That is not Lu Han.” He says to himself again and this time sees an obvious contradiction of his beloved. Sehun watched as the boy continued to dance with his sword gracefully unlike anybody he had ever seen before. Not even Tao or Lay had been pristine with their movements as fluid as the boy continued.

    He settles again training his eyes on the boy who is still dancing with his sword. Sehun settled with the idea that it wasn’t a ghost or a mirage but maybe another boy similar to Lu Han. 

    Minutes passed and still the boy wielded his sword with no tire. Sehun thought how odd it is for someone training in the middle of the night by himself. And more so he found his mind wandering to thoughts of Lu Han after he left, of a family he might’ve had and even of an elder Lu Han who would’ve been grey-haired and hunched back. Because Lu Han was human. He had more life and love in him than anything and anyone Sehun had ever known. And that was partly why he loved the man. He taught Sehun everything about life and love that Sehun wished he had been able to grow old grey-haired and hunched back with Lu Han as well. 

    He watched there for a couple more hours, glad that the boy hadn’t noticed him at all and he was free to just watch. He couldn’t stop his heart pounding fighting to jump through his chest as excitement enveloped him. It was like watching a video, Lu Han’s video. The boy in the field just continued to move with no tire and he just enjoyed the show. He might’ve been there for two hours or so but Sehun never realized it. He didn’t want the vision to end and he barely even blinked or look away. He didn’t dare. Sehun didn’t push it either when the boy finally stopped and he packed up to walk away. It was sad to see the boy fleeting and there was a pricking emptiness that dug into his depression once again as the boy inched towards the tree line away from the field. Sehun had to swallow hard and just accept the fact that the dream or hallucination was all over. He was lucky enough to even have a short glimpse of his beloved and he was satisfied or so he says to himself.

    But as he stared into his blank ceiling that night and he busied himself the next day, he couldn’t help but think of the boy in the training field. He played with the idea of a haunting ghost, or a mirage or hallucination. But in a way he could’ve also been just another student from the academy. Nonetheless, the moment he had out there the night before was addictive enough to want more. He contemplated long and hard if he should go back and try his luck again because there is a possibility the boy may come back if he is indeed real. And what a temptation it was for Sehun to succumb to a desire to see an apparition or a mere look-a-like.

    When the sun finally fell, he dropped everything instantly and ran as fast as he could to the very same spot the night before.  Not caring to look back or answer even Chen who questions at the door. He just bolted and left hoping and praying that his luck hadn’t run out yet. 

    Sehun stood leaning against the railing once again panting as he basically ran from the lab as if trying to race the rising moon and the darkness that fell. He wasn’t sure why he hurried so much with no hesitation, but he knew he just had to be there and see him one more time.  Minutes passed, then hours until he’s heard his own stomach grown in protest. He had missed lunch earlier trying so hard to finish up what he and Chen planned to do, now he wished he would’ve passed the kitchen for dinner or a snack at least. It’s already midnight and still the boy has not shown up.

    While along he thought of how stupid the situation is but ‘just a bit more’ he pleaded as if asking for permission from time, fate or luck. Bt still no sign of the honey-colored hair boy. Until the moon had started its descent and Sehun perked at an image of  a boy walking to the middle of the field. taking a stance and with force wielding his slender sword, the boy began to dance to the music of the deep night accompanied by it’s blinding spotlight, the moon. It had shown on him so bright it was unmistakable to Sehun for it to be anything less than ethereal.

With the darkness of the sky and the brightness of the moon, the boy danced perfectly fitting in it only familiar surrounding to Sehun.

“Lu Han…” The name breathless on his lips.

It is Lu Han. To Sehun, it can only be Lu Han.

“Lu Han…” He whispers again and the wind ghastly whistled in tension. The grip of his hand tightening on the rail, Sehun couldn’t help but shed tears of joy, drowning out the reality of pain he should be feeling now.

“If I can only have this… it’s enough.” He murmured to himself as he brushed away more tears glistening his cheeks. 

This is is enough. He thought.

    It was the high of seeing the boy again and again. That’s what he came back for. For nights on end, Sehun rushed to the bridge the same time every night when the moon was at its peak. He never bothered to disturb the boy practicing from a distance. Sehun was scared that his only grip on the memory of his beloved would be gone if he ran straight to scare it away. So he simply stood in the same spot in the middle of the bridge and settled in his favorite position watching for hours until the boy grew tired and he had to pack and leave for the dorm.

    There were nights when Sehun would stare at the boy practicing and he would cry at the sheer likeness of the figure. Eating away his only ground, he would sob to himself as he couldn't help but remember the pain and the desperation to touch his beloved once again. And then there were those nights where he pretended to talk to the boy, having their usual chit chat about life and science. He took the boy's movements as its own reply or way of communicating back to him. Laughing as he had agreed throughout the ease of his up and down maneuver and swiftly responding defensively as the boy wielded with speed. It was heart wrenching to watch for an outsider and Sehun knew this. And Sehun also knew EXO would’ve thought he was crazy if he informed them of his nightly visits stalking a random student of the academy. But there was nothing he could do. It was all he had.

    Until one day, he found the boy laying next to another male slightly larger than he. He had arrived a bit later that the usual due to news of another attack. Another city had been obliterated to pieces but Sehun’s mind is somewhere else. As soon as Suho had ended his brief, Sehun just about jumped up off his seat running as as he could to the bridge. 

    That’s when the sight of two boys laying on the hill halted his steps and made his heart drop.  The two propped the back of their heads against their arms and just looked at the starry sky. A moonless night made for the perfect star gazing, it had made every star beam brighter and he could tell from their relaxed positions that it had been a special night. The training halted and all they did, he assumed, was talk and watch the stars. The scene reminded him so much of Lu Han’s favorite pass time, star gazing. Although the human never really cared for the names of the constellations and such, they never seemed to have a dull moment as the boy tried to make his own constellation much like playing connect the dots.

“Sehun do you see the race car? How about the lollipop? Oooh Oooh I see an umbrella!” Sehun could only shake his head in amusement as they both knew there were no such constellations. It was merely for fun much like a little kid making figures out of fluffs of clouds in the sky.

    Sehun stood rooted to the bridge contemplating if he should continue to watch since he felt like he was intruding on the boys' moment together. But as hard as he tried, he couldn’t avert his eyes from the sight. Sehun could almost feel the jealousy boiling in the pit of his stomach. Someone interrupted their nightly rendezvous, their conversation albeit it being one-sided and it didn’t sit right with Sehun. It hurt him so much to see someone else taking up the boy’s time. As if he had owned the boy to begin with, as if he was betrayed by the one he loved, Sehun heaved in frustration as he couldn’t do anything more than just watch. 

    So, he darted away from the bridge and ran and ran with no sort of direction. The well lit path had dissolved behind him and now the moonless sky betrayed him. Running with not so much a thought as to where he was going, he just picked up his feet and trudged it one after the other, pushing harder to rid himself of pain. And now he was passed the tree line and he doesn’t know where he was. He panted holding tight at his aching knees and legs and he scans his surroundings to finally realize he is lost. 

    The run became came to a desperate halt as he barely could see anything in front of him. He trudged broken into the forest, pushing aside branches one after the other until he was reaching the thickest part of the forest. He was now away from the lined path deep lost and distraught. As his heart paced and fought to calm the sobs that were about to come out, so as his feet and its pace in no certain direction what so ever threatening to never stop. It was best to stop he thought but he didn’t want to be stuck there all night either so he kept on going.  The ascension he felt raised suspicions and he knew he was going the wrong direction. So he circled again and decided to go back to whence he came, but his foot got caught in a trunk laying on the ground and he completely tripped and toppled over it. His left leg banged against a rock beside it making him lose his balance with nothing visible to hold on to. Next thing he knew he was rolling down the hill with his body banging against the dirt and exposed roots, rocks scraping every part of him before he finally hit the ground. He felt his knee hit something hard and cold, and a new sensation came over him making him scream instantly from the pain.

"AHHHHHH!!!!!" A sharp stinging pain to his leg made him scream. The leg started throbbing and he ran his fingers on the injury. He screamed one more time as another wave of stinging pain radiated up his leg. The odd sensation on the hands that ran through the injury made him rub the pads of his fingers to confirm. Wet and oozing, he could only assume that it was blood. A sudden pang made him wince again as he felt dazed and dizzy unable to focus his sights. the darkness had betrayed him and it didn’t helot that he remembers his head hitting something uprooted form the ground as he rolled down the hill. No light, no sound of anything in the vicinity, Sehun knew he was done for. 

    The realization made him feel helpless. Accepting the fact that he was going to be stuck there all night even all day unless someone happened to get lost tomorrow morning and takes the forest path to the manor. It was unlikely really that somebody would or could find him at all. 

Kai where are you? Please find me. Please. Please. Sehun found himself chanting the name. There wasn’t any way he’d know or hear but it brought comfort to Sehun hat he had at least Kai to call to.

He tried to raise his arms up to grab hold of something but another pain struck him on his shoulder and his arm fell limp hitting something on the way down. A wall. He tried feeling his way around him and all he felt were walls that seemed to surround him. Fear had now caught up with him. Not only is he hurt and bleeding, he seemed to have fallen into a hole, a trap set up for wandering wild animals in the forest. 

"Help! I need help." He screamed this time with panic and fear because being enclosed in this state ‘again’ brought him back to the place he feared the most, the vortex. It was like closing in on him and the feeling of being stuck crept up and he began to shake panicking on his spot. 

"HELP! Please, please help! Anyone!" The urgency, desperation and fear lingered on every syllable he uttered and he doesn't know why the fear is taking over him much faster harder than it should.

    He tried to move his limbs but pain just took over him making him feel helpless. Sehun fell in a hole in the ground maybe 10-15 feet deep. He can’t really be sure since he couldn’t even stand up but he can see a clearing of some sort. He tried to grab onto something to stand himself up but his body failed with another shot of pain coming over him. He just looked up into the dark sky and cried helplessly because, once again, he felt alone. It was just like the vortex. He had nowhere to go. He had no one and for sure no one to come help him.