“I told you I don’t love you! It’s hopeless! Leave me alone! I never want to see your stupid face ever again!”

Hyukjae sat motionless on the ground, silent tears streamed down his cheeks and neck as Donghae hurriedly walked away. It had all happened so fast. One moment he and Donghae were madly in love with each other, and the next, the one person he cared about the most was throwing him on the ground.

“I don’t love you!”

The words shattered Hyukjae from the inside out. His chest felt tight, and it was difficult to breathe. The world around him started spinning and eventually went black.

But he wasn’t the only person crying in the empty park. Tears fell in unstoppable trails from two brown eyes hiding behind a nearby tree and aching sobs were muffled from the brunette’s mouth as he bit into the sleeve of his jacket.

Hyukjae woke up the next morning on the couch in the living room of his shared apartment…or formerly shared apartment. It all came rushing back to him at once.

Donghae had left him.

He didn’t know how he got back to the apartment, but he immediately got up and began to search for Donghae inside the rooms.

He wasn’t anywhere and his belongings were gone.

Donghae truly didn’t love him anymore.

Somehow, Hyukjae found himself back at the park that morning, clutching the ring given to him by Donghae when they were teenagers. There was a deep pond near the back of the park. Hyukjae considered jumping in. He thought about drowning himself. Why not? He had nothing more to live for.

Hyukjae squeezed the ring in his hand so tight, that it cut into his palm. Being so greatly confused in the moment, Hyukjae couldn’t stop himself before he heard the soft splash.

The ring was sinking to the bottom of the pond.

The redhead panicked. Without thinking about the possible consequences, he ran into the frigid water. He had to find that ring. It was the only thing he had left of Donghae.

It only took a few steps for Hyukjae to lose his footing and slip under the freezing liquid. He struggled to get back to the surface, but his body quickly became numb. He could no longer feel his arms or legs, and his strength was gone.

Maybe this was for the best. If he died, then he wouldn’t have to live a life without Donghae.

He loved him that much.

When Hyukjae could no longer hold his breath, and he was too tired from trying to swim in the chilly pond, he stopped fighting. He couldn’t hold his breath any longer. As oxygen created bubbles from below the surface, water rushed into Hyukjae’s lungs and he truly believed that he was going to die. Any resolve he had to live disappeared the night before.

Donghae…I…  

Suddenly, Hyukjae felt warm. He knew that he was dead. He had to be. This kind of warmth was so familiar. He believed that the only way he would feel that warmth again was if he died because attaining it in reality was now impossible.

Something brushed against his lips and air entered his lungs. He coughed up the water and squinted into the bright sunlight of the morning sky.

Before he could see who had saved him, the person ran off. Hyukjae caught a glimpse of chocolate hair, but that was all.

Some passersby saw him lying on the ground and called for an ambulance. It would turn out to be one of many hospital visits to take place over the next two years.

And he never found the ring.

*~*~*

Hyukjae quickly snapped back to reality. He tried to clear his head of that memory. Why would he be remembering something like that now? Being brought back to his senses by Kyuhyun’s protective hug, Hyukjae glanced at the younger man holding him in a way that made a certain fishy in the room very unhappy.

“I said to let him go,” Donghae growled again.

The redhead, still in slight shock from hearing that childish yet mature voice again, turned to meet its owner.

Donghae was angrily pointing at Kyuhyun who still hadn’t removed his arms from around Hyukjae’s waist. The wavy-haired brunette smirked and tightened his grip on Hyukjae just to see the newcomer’s reaction.

“Why you… Do I have to – mmph!”

Heechul covered Donghae’s mouth with his hand and whacked the boy on the top of his head with the other.

“Aish~ Remember where you are,” he told the brunette darkly. He gestured with his head toward the staring customers.

Hankyung mentally face palmed. He wished that Donghae hadn’t started acting so impulsive as soon as he got back.

“But, but, hyung…”

“I didn’t call you here to make a scene, Donghae. Wait until the place closes. Stop making an idiot out of yourself.” Heechul leaned in closer. “You think he’ll want to accept you again if you act like a spoiled child?”

Donghae knew Heechul was right and shook his head. Just stay calm, right? Donghae slumped into the chair across from Heechul and bounced one leg up and down impatiently. He was pouting and shooting a deadly look at Kyuhyun who hadfinally removed his arms from around Hyukjae’s waist and was sitting down at the counter where Hyukjae was working. Donghae strained to listen in on Hyukjae and Kyuhyun’s conversation.

But seconds later, Donghae wished he hadn’t.

“Who is that guy, Hyukkie hyung?” Kyuhyun asked, glancing sideways at Donghae.

Hyukjae was silent for a moment, trying to come up with the answer to that question. He shrugged and sent Donghae a disapproving look before answering, “I don’t know. I’ve never met him before in my life.”

Donghae bit his lip to keep from gasping. Never before had he seen Hyukjae look at him so coldly. He figured he deserved such a remark, but that didn’t change the fact that those words still stabbed at Donghae’s heart.

“Well that’s odd,” Kyuhyun went on, placing his chin on his palm and gazing up at Hyukjae. “Is he your stalker?”

More like heartbreaker, Hyukjae thought. He wondered why God hated him so much. As soon as his heart was one step away from healing completely and forgetting the painful past, it all came flying back at him. Why was Donghae here now? But more importantly, Why did he say ‘my Hyukkie’?

“Don’t worry, hyung. I’ll protect you.” Kyuhyun winked, causing a blush to appear on Hyukjae’s pale features.

Donghae clenched his fist so tight that his nails bit into his palm. He even drew blood. Only he was allowed to make Hyukjae turn that shade of pink, only him. He would just have to wait his turn quietly, which was nearly impossible.

But he stayed silent anyway. After a couple of hours, afternoon turned into evening and the many customers began to leave. Leeteuk and Ryeowook took their leave as well, leaving Hankyung to lock up the café. Eventually, the only people left was Heechul, hankyung, Hyukjae, Kyuhyun, and a very pissed off Donghae.

Three hours of watching Kyuhyun flirt with his Hyukkie was getting on his nerves. He knew that he really had no right to just steal Hyukjae back and force him to get back together with him. Donghae regretted his decision two years ago, but he had to do it. Maybe, he just could have done it in a better way.

Lost in his thoughts, Donghae barely realized that Kyuhyun was leading Hyukjae outside so he could walk the redhead home. The brunette jumped up from his seat and caught Hyukjae wrist before he walked too far. He tugged gently at Hyukjae, his eyes pleading and full of guilt. Kyuhyun pulled on Hyukjae’s other hand.

It was like a tug of war, and Hyukjae hated being the rope.

“Yah! Would you let go of me?” Hyukjae yelled. It was directed at Donghae.

The brunette stubbornly shook his head. “Hyukkie, we need to talk.”

“What could you possibly have to say to me?” Hyukjae tried to sound angry, but his wrist felt all tingly from Donghae’s hand. The sensation distracted him.

Donghae made a whimpering sound, something like a kicked puppy. “Please, Hyukjae let me explain…”

“Don’t you think it’s a little too late for that? You could have explained a long time ago.”

“You have to let me tell you everything! I need you Hyukkie!”

Hyukjae rolled his eyes. “Why? So you can around with me again and throw me on the ground like trash? I don’t think so.”

“Please! Listen to me!”

Hyukjae wrenched his arm free from Donghae’s grasp. Not saying anything back to him, Hyukjae began to walk away, Kyuhyun still holding his left hand. Donghae chased after them, desperate to tell Hyukjae the truth.

They made their way to that park and Hyukjae had begun to cry. He wiped the tears away hastily. Suddenly, so much emotion had overwhelmed him. His mind was telling him that Donghae was no good for him, but his heart said otherwise. It was all so confusing.

“You obviously know him, Hyukjae,” Kyuhyun whispered seriously. “An ex-boyfriend?” Hyukjae let out a broken sob. He sat down on the bench and patted the seat next to him. Hyukjae sank down next to Kyuhyun and the younger boy wrapped his arms around Hyukjae. “I told you I’d protect you, hyung. I’ll do anything for you. Just stop crying, please.”

Hyukjae mumbled something into Kyuhyun’s jacket. Kyuhyun asked Hyukjae to repeat his sentence.

“Kiss me.” Hyukjae stared into Kyuhyun’s eyes. “Kiss me and make me forget.”

Yes, Hyukjae wanted to forget. He wanted to forget that Donghae had come back. He wanted to leave behind those feelings that had begun to reappear the second he heard the brunette’s voice. He wanted Kyuhyun to be the one to make him forget.

Kyuhyun blinked at the boldness of his hyung, but it quickly faded when his hidden desires emerged from within him and he leaned forward. “Anything for you.”

Hyukjae’s lips were like heaven. Kyuhyun bit back a moan almost as soon as their mouths touched. Hyukjae wound his arms around Kyuhyun’s neck and pulled the younger closer to him. The kiss was not gentle. It was hungry. Kyuhyun wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of his life kissing Hyukjae. What could he say? The guy was so addictive and innocent and y all at the same time.

Climbing onto Kyuhyun’s lap, Hyukjae felt his heart beating. It wasn’t the same kind of fast-paced beating that one gets from kissing the one they love passionately. His heart beat because it was screaming at Hyukjae to stop. But his body ignored the message, as though it knew that Kyuhyun was right for him.

Kyuhyun groaned at Hyukjae’s intimate gestures and movements. He gripped him tighter as his tongue explored Hyukjae’s sweet cavern, tasting everything that was the redhead.

Donghae witnessed it all. His heart felt as though it had exploded in his chest, shards tearing at his insides, causing him a slow and painful death. He dropped to the ground behind a tree and bit into his arm to keep from crying out loud. As he cried, he got a rush of nostalgia, like he had cried here before.

Donghae searched his pockets for it, the item he searched desperately for two years ago, and pulled out a small silver ring.

*~*~*

“This is a mess, hyung!” Donghae screamed at Heechul’s apartment later that night. Hyukjae hadn’t come home. “He won’t even let me explain!”

“Who would blame him?” Heechul stated, nuzzling Hankyung’s neck.

“Hyung! You aren’t helping me here!”

“You screwed up Donghae. There were different ways you could have handled the situation, you know.”

“But, it wasn’t my fault. He would have gotten in trouble if I hadn’t ended us the way I did. When I called him, I only wanted to warn him about the situation. How was I supposed to know that my parents were spying on me? I had no choice!”

“Coward,” Heechul muttered.

Donghae bowed his head in defeat. He admitted that he had acted cowardly back then instead of facing his parents directly over the matter. But it was solved now. Things should begin to look up right?

“Please,” Donghae begged. “Please get him to talk to me. I love him. I really love him a lot. I never stopped loving him.”

“We’ll try, Donghae,” Hankyung said, placing a hand on the saddened boy’s shoulder. “Just give him some time.”

Donghae thought about Kyuhyun. The image of that guy kissing Hyukjae would forever haunt him in his nightmares. “I don’t have time, hyung.”

11/6/10