This is going to be Jaemin's POV and my POV (author's POV). Enjoy :)

Where's more easy to live in? In dreams or  reality? Obviously, in dreams. But I'm currently living in reality. I was forced to live there, its where humans were born....should be born. I don't like it there, its such a dump. Its unmagical & ordinary. If ever there was something magical and extraordinary to happen its only meant for a moment, a day, an hour, a second.


I wish reality was like my dreams. Just like in my stories. Yes, you've guessed it. I'm a writer. But what's a writer like me, writing about reality in a bad way? Is it because I'm living in reality? That I should write things that makes sense? Hey, don't you judge me...


By the way, I'm Ahn Jaemin, but my co-workers call me Angel (idk, greasy ain't it?). As young as I am, I own a cafe. Well, not really that young, I'm 17. I was suppose to be working as a novelist but insteasd, I'm the one running this branch.  My parents own a lot of cafes and restuarants around Korea. School? Been there, done that. I finished studying early. Dont call me a nerd. I just want to get out of that hell hole. Fast.


I dont like my life. Its not magical, its not normal either. I dont know...its boring? Lifeless? I'm not able to 'pilot' my own life. My notebooks are the places that's magical, that's because I'm running it. If only I'll literally fit in my notebook. I guess, I'm only able to scribble words :/


"Manager, shouldn't you be heading home now?"


A hand suddenly settled on my shoulder. I followed the hand to its owner.


"Oh, Howon-ssi."


Lee Howon, my barista. I've been running this cafe for 3 years, Howon here is my first employee.


"I thought I closed the shop early. Why are you still here?"


He raised a brow at me.


"Shouldn't that question be directed to you, Manager?"


"Well, I..uhh...I wanted to stay longer."


"What for? You always go home after closing the shop."


What is wrong with this guy? Can't I stay in my own cafe? I don't recall being it a law.


Howon caught sight of my notebook and took a peek at it. I slowly closed it.


"What are you doing?"


"What's that, Manager?"


"Its a notebook." I sheepishly smiled.


He chuckled.


"Manager."


"What? Its a notebook. Can't you see?"


"Ha, okay okay. What's in the notebook?"


I was about to answer him, but he knew what I was going to say.


"Its words, I get it. I meant to say, what are you writing about?"


"And why do you wanna know that?"


He took a chair and sat across me. Placing his elbow on the table and his chin in his palm.


"Manager, the shop's close. We wont be working until the New Year. People are busy shopping. So can't a guy, like me, get to know a girl, like you?"


A small patch of pink color appeared on my cheek. I haven't been asked this way, ever.


"Howon-ssi.."


He raised hand, indicating me to stop.


"Please, call me Hoya. Let's be friends today. Arasso, Angel?"


The patch of pink color soon turned into deep red and spread all over my face.

"Wha-what the...Would you all please stop calling me Angel?"


"Ah, arasso arasso, Jaemin-ah. But don't forget, uri neun chinguya"

I hung my head low and started to play with my fingers. Seriously, what's wrong with him? What's wrong with me?


I just simply nodded.


Howon-- I mean, Hoya chatted with me until 7 in the evening. I didnt even noticed it was already dark. He walked me home. I refused because it was already night time and his parents might be looking for him. He said girls shouldn't go home by themselves at night. Oh well..

"So this me."

He eyed it from top to bottom.

"Cozy.  Oh, is that your room?"


He was pointing at the window. I giggled, he was so cute. He's like a little kid.


"No, Hoya. That's not my room."


He nodded and made a :O face. I smiled and shook my head.


"Well, its late. You should go now."


I was about to walk away when somebody pulled my wrist.


"Hoya...?"


His expression was straight. He started to inch closer and closer to me until my back already touched the wall. I gulped, scared of what he's about to do.


"Jaemin-ah, didnt you know....that you look really pretty under the moonlight?"


I blushed at what he said.


Badump..badump..badump..

O-oh, too close..

"W-wha-what are y-you doing?"


He lowered down, leveling with my face. He cocked to the side and he suddenly pecked my cheek. My eyes widened. He released my wrist and inched back.


"Good night, Jaemin. I'll text you, if that's okay. Oh, and don't ask where I got your number."


He winked before walking away and leaving me dumbfounded.


What was that about?






A week passed ever since Hoya started texting me and Christmas was fast approaching. He told me more about a lot of things about him. Like, he has no siblings. He didnt knew his parents and is living with his grandmother. He's currently in the province with his grandmother he'll be spending his Christmas and New Year there. He's 17 like me, he's not studying though. He worked for his sick grandmother. Poor guy...


We just talked and talked about ourselves, nothing in particular. He did tell me a lot of weird things like...


From: Hoya~
To: Jaemin~


Jaemin-ah, for a single moment I want to feel like the universe isnt about to crush me and my heart isnt about to explode. I would kiss you and tell you 'I love you' and ask you to please stay with me...


Cute, right? Should I GM that? ^^ (GM. group message)



From: Hoya~

To: Jaemin~


You know what, Jaemin? I should really put the other girls in another planet...


They're becoming really ugly. I dont want you to catch the disease *pouts*


From: Hoya~
To: Jaemin~


Jaemin-ah, you should sleep now. Dont worry about me, every moment spent with you even if we're just texting is like a dream come true. I dont need sleep. Goognight~ ^^


This guy is crazy. Was he always a fool at speech? I haven't actually talked to him. If we did, it would only be about work. I dont usually talk to people. My diary is my only chatmate. But having someone to talk to has a different feeling from when I'm writing my diary. I began to feel all sorts of emotions. One time, my stomach began churning when Hoya's caller ID was on my phone. I thought I had a bad lunch. Then my maids told me that my face was pink. I wasnt sick, though.


Is this the effect of radiation? Because I've been using my phone for a while.


Or...is this the feeling of having...a friend? Maybe, I guess. But why now?. Why would he talk and be friends with me just now? What could be the reason for befriending me?


Is he the one to change my life? What could he do anyway? He's just a guy. I'd be really suprise if he was paranormal or something, but reality is reality. Duh.

Another thing, can I trust him? Trust....something worth than expensive. Its not cheap either. It is within the person if he/she gives his/her trust to a person that she/he is worthy, so I've been told. I havent given anyone my whole trust. Not even my parents. Heck, I barely even talk to them...and they're my parents. If they do talk to me, it wouldnt be pleasant to hear.


Speaking of which, they just got invited to an exclusive Christmas party by the CEO and owner of a really big company. Luck wasnt on my side because my snotty parents dragged me along. I dont wanna go. I hate parties. I would just be outside or stay in the balcony. Which is where I am right now.


I read Hoya's message from 10 minutes ago. He said he'd come back to Seoul after the New Year. I cant text him because I might disturb his Christmas eve. Well, this . THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR MAKING ME AN ONLY DAUGHTER.


"Jaemin-ah."


I turned around and saw my mother standing be the door. She looked pissed. Obviously because I wasnt mingling.


I hate parties, remember? Well, I doubt she knows that.


"Ne, Umma?"


"I want you to meet someone. Seodulleo."


WHAT NOW? Another business chat? Puh-lease, I dont wanna hear another topic about marketing sales and such. Its so booooring. I lazily dragged my feet to our table. Someone was sitting on my seat. A man in his 20's looked at me and smiled. He stood up and gave me his hand.


"Annyeonghaseyo, nan Nam Woohyun imnida."


I shook his hand and gave him a little smile.


"Oh, Woohyun-ssi, Annyeonghaseyo. Nan Ahn Jaemin imnida."


"I know. Please, call me Woohyun. Your parents told me so much about you."


I looked at my parents who were smilling oh-so wide when another man, but in his 40's, came to our table.


"Jaemin, this is Nam Dongsun. CEO and owner of Nam Foods. The one who invited us."


My mother pulled me to her side to make me face the old man. I'm guessing this is Woohyun's father?


"Our Jaemin here, just agreed to the arranged marriage plan with your son. Isnt that great?"


WAIT. Whoa, back up. Me? Arranged marriage plan?! What is going on here? DID I MISS SOMETHING? How could they agree to this without my concern? HOW DARE THEY?!!


My blood was boiling. I wanted to scream at them. I want to punch them. I dont wanna get married. I'm still goddamn seventeen! Its not that I dont like Woohyun. He's quite good-looking. Still, no.


Suddenly someone nudged my shoulder. It was Woohyun handing me a glass of wine. I dont do well with alcohol. I easily get drunk.


"Uhm, Woohyun, I dont really-"


My mother squeezed my wrist and whispered to my ear..


"Accept it. Dont be rude."


"But, Umma...I dont drink. You know I easily get tipsy-Oww!"


She squeezed my wrist hard. Well, that was comforting. I slowly grabbed the wine glass and thanked him. I went to my seat and stared at my wine glass. The strong smell of the wine hit me. I wanted to gag. I sipped the wine, more like just making it touch my lips so it seems like I'm drinking. But I can still taste its bitterness.


"Ahem.."


My mother stood up from her seat and raised her glass.


"...I would like to make a toast. To my Jaemin and my soon-to-be son-in-law, Woohyun. May you both have a happy marriage and may our merged companies be successful."


My? Wow, Umma. You're being nice now? I silently scoffed to myself.


My phone vibrated. Hoya's caller ID came out. Phew, saved by the bell. I was about to excuse myself when Woohyun tapped my shoulder. I quickly hid my phone and looked at him.


"Ne?"


"Jaemin-ah, can I talk to you in private?"


I was about to reject but he interupted me. He pulled me up and excused us from our parents.


"Mr. and Mrs. Ahn, Appa. Can we excuse ourselves?"


"OH! Of course, of course. Have fun."


My mother's voice heightened. She seems to be having fun with me suffering. I wanted to make them happy, but not like this. I dont want this, but they do. Its impossible to make both sides happy. 


Woohyun pulled me to the same balcony. He gestured me to walk in first. I went to a small stool table and placed my drink. Then I heard something click. I looked at Woohyun who was facing the sliding doors. He gave a sideways glanced and smirked. I have a weird feeling about this, trust me, its not that weird feeling Hoya gave me. Speaking of which, my phone has been vibrating for a while. I reached for it in my bag but Woohyun quickly swatted it away.


"What the hell?!"


"Hey, hey. Calm down. No need to shout. We dont need any disturbances to do this..."


He grabbed me from the shoulders and pushed me to the wall. I wanted to shout but this glass is bullet-proof and sound-proof. Nice, just what this ing hotel needed. I tried to push him off but he was too strong. He laughed at my weakness. He swiftly grabbed both of my wrists and pinned them above my head.


"Jaemin...So it was true that you were called Angel. How I admired you when you first walked in. I knew I had to make a move..."


He placed a finger on my chest and started to slide down to the middle of my .


"Say, Angel. What cup size are you? Oh, wait. I'll just find that out myself."


He slowly started ping my dress. The zipper was just under my left arm.


"Please take care of me, Mrs. Nam. You know, you were suppose to be married to my older brother but good thing I volunteered..."

I shivered at his cold hands. I was too scared to scream. Tears were already streaming down my face. I tried to pry off him but his hands still wont budge. He's too strong.


Some reality this is. my life...



I need help..



I looked over to my phone that was still vibrating.



Hoya...I need you..


I closed my eyes. Seeing Hoya's happy face and replaying the sound of his voice. I suddenly had the strength to fight. I had determination. I opened my eyes and kicked Woohyun's manhood. Good thing his legs were apart. He doubled onto the floor and curled up. I quickly grabbed my phone and dashed out. I walked fast to the main door when a hand pulled me back.


"Where are you going? And where's Woohyun?"


I pulled off my wrist from my mother's grip. I stared at her with my wet eyes.


"Umma...Aren't you gonna ask me what happened? Did you know that he almost me?"


"What? Woohyun? Thats preposterous. Stop saying nonsense. You want him to marry you, right? Right, Angel?"


I was confused at my mother's cooing voice. Then I looked around to see that everyone was looking at our direction. I shook my head and started to sob.


"Umma...I dont want to!"


She slapped my cheek and her eyes grew big. I slowly turned to her.


"Ya, I know what is best for your future. Now, you do what I say-"


"YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT ME! You dont care about me, Umma. Appa cares a little but its still not enough. You dont even know my likes and dislikes. One time you forgot how old I was! Preposterous? I think thats what you are now, Umma. I'm leaving."


I turned and went my way. She was countlessly calling my name. Cursing at the same time. When I got out, I ran to the nearest park and sat down on a bench. To my luck, it started to rain.


What did I do in my seventeen years of living to deserve this? I've already suffered enough. Everyday, when I get out of the house or even wake up in the morning, I can feel that the world is always giving me the bad finger. Saying, that I'll be trap here forever, that my thoughts are things just to kill time.


Suddenly my phone started to vibrate again. I was a bit happy when Hoya's caller ID came out again, and that my phone was water-proof.


"Y-yeobsaeyo?"


"Jaemin, thank goodness. I thought you'd never pick up. So, how's the party?"


I sighed softly. I tried to hold back my tears and to sound normal.


"I-its fun. Y-you should've seen the b-ballroom."


"Yeah, but I'm stuck here. Don't worry, I'll be back soon."


It was silent for a while. I grabbed the opportunity to let my tears slip.


"Jaemin-ah...its raining here. Is it also raining there in Seoul?"


"Y-yeah. It is."


"Do you like the rain?"


"Yes....because its like pouring out the bad memories. When your mind clears up like when the dark clouds disappear, it means everything is now better.."


"Oh. I dont really like the rain.....because its soaking your beautiful dress..."


"What?"


"Dwidolabwa.."


My eyes widened when I turned and saw Hoya standing behind me holding an umbrella.

Purple. His favorite color..


"Hey there.."


I stood up hugged him, soaking his shirt. I was so happy to see him. He wrapped his arms around my wet body and placed his chin on my head.


"When did you get here?"


"You didnt pick up. I thought something happened."


"You came all the way, just because I didnt pick up? Such an idiot. But I'm glad you did. Thank you, Hoya."


"I'd do anything for the girl I love."


I raised my head to look at him. My heart pounded at his sudden confession. He meekly smiled.


"Ever since I started working in the cafe, I started to have feelings for you. Don't get me wrong, I dont believe in love at first sight. You're really a nice person. The things...the cute things you do makes my heart waver. Plus, you're very pretty. I thought you're going to be the death of me. What guy would never fall in love with you?"


My heart felt warm under the cold pouring rain. He kissed my forehead and smiled at me.


"I dont know what to say. I didnt know I could make you feel that way. Are you sure you confessed the right person?"


"You dont choose who you love...it just happens. I didnt want these feeling at first because I know we came from two different worlds, but once you have these feelings, they will always be there. I accepted them and admit to myself that....I really love you. Now, I dont expect you to answer me right away. Don't worry, I'll wait."


"Hoya, my heart and mind is still confused right now. I'm glad you know that I still need time to think. Its really funny though, both of them were hurt, played, cheated, ripped and torn. Somehow they still work."


I just chuckled at my sudden realization. I was smilling again. The rain stopped and just as the dark clouds disappeared, I calmed down. What happened a while ago in the hotel was all a blur to me. I dont care about it anymore.






Two months have passed ever sinced I ran away from home. I'm currently living in Hoya's apartment. I didnt want to disturb his home but he insisted. It was a good idea all along. My life has been better with him. Last month, I finally answered him.


I was in the kitchen happily cooking breakfast for the both of us. Suddenly a pair of arms s around my waist.



"M~y A~ngel. Mwohaneungeoya?"


"I'm cooking, obviously. Go and wash up already. You stink"


He chuckled and pecked my head.


"Ne~"


He released his arms and started walking to the bathroom. I was setting up the table when I heard a knock at the door.


"Chakkaman..."


I opened the door and saw two huge men in black.


"Are you Ahn Jaemin?"


"Y-yes. May I help you?"


Suddenly, two people came behind the men in black. My eyes widened who I saw. My heart started to beat really fast. Blood started to boil. My fists were clenching, ready to punch the two bastards who suddenly came back into my life.


"Umma...Appa..."


"Yes, Jaemin. Now that we've found you, lets go home. Pack your things and we'll be in the car."


"What makes you think I'll come home with the two of you. I'm staying."


My mother approached me and was about to give me a slap. I held her wrist and threw it back to her.


"No, no more. I dont wanna see you both. I want you out of this apartment, out of this building and out of my life."


"How dare you speak to me like that? I will disown you. You hear me?!"


"Go ahead I dont care. I've been waiting for you to disown me anyway."


"YOU INSOLENT GIRL!"


She started pulling me out. My father didnt do anything but just standing and watching us. He was expressionless. I'm guessing he's hating this kind of reality too. Being under my mother's command although he was the owner and CEO of our company. But all things must be approved by mother dearest.


"Let go! STOP!"


I was pulling my wrist out of her grip until I felt pain in my chest. Oxygen was slowly fading. My heart hurt. My head was spinning. My body was weakening. I couldnt breath anymore. I saw Hoya coming out of the bathroom, shocked.


"JAEMIN!"


Was the last thing I heard from him when I passed out.







Beep...beep....beep...beep


Where am I? Why is everything so dark? Why can't I move?



"...She's in a state of comma right now."
 

Who said that?


"Its been weeks. How long will she stay like that?"


Hoya, that's Hoya's voice. Why cant I see him? I cant speak. My lips wont move. Why do hear beeping sounds? Could somebody tell me where I am?


"Jaemin-ah.."


Hoya! Hoya, help. Where are you?


"The doctor said you'll be fine. I dont think you can go home tomorrow. You'll be staying here for a while. But dont worry, I'll always be here. I have to work though but, I'll immediately come here."


Doctor? Staying?


"...Jaemin. You have cancer....in the heart.."


What?


I have cancer. I'll die...


This is unfair. See? Whenever good things happen, bad things just pop out of nowhere and ruin it all. My life is pathetic. This ..


The following days were painful. Everynow and then, my heart would hurt and my BP started to rise. My body grew weaker and weaker. I feel bad for Hoya worrying and attending to me. He hasnt been getting enough sleep because of me. I might not see it, but I know he's getting really tired. I'm trying my best to stay alive so that he'll stay alive too.


Just then my heart started to hurt again. My body jumped and squirmed around. Hoya was shouting, calling the nurses and doctors. I can hear the electrocardiogram beeping slowly. I couldnt take it anymore. My body hurts. I want it to stop. I want....to go now. Then the beeping sounded longer. I had to go...
 

----


They saw that the electrocardiogram was making a flatline. Jaemin was gone.


"JAEMIN! No...no...NO!!"


He ran towards Jaemin shaking her to wake up.


"Jaemin, wake up. WAKE UP! Dont leave me! Jaemin! Doctor, do something."


The doctor started giving pumps into her chest. Sadly, her lifeless body was still lifeless. The doctor stopped and sadly looked at Hoya who was sobbing and holding onto Jaemin's hand.


"Time of death, 7:28 PM. Hoya-ssi, stop. She's gone..."


"NO! She's not!...JAEMIN! Angel....Kajima."


The doctor and nurses left Hoya with Jaemin. He was still shaking her. After a few minutes he calmed down. He was sitting on the floor, resting his back beside the bed still holding her hand.


"Jaemin-ah...do you remember my text message? The one where I asked you to please stay? I wasnt joking...."


Hoya held his knees to his chest and started to sob again.

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-


"What the heck are you talking about...?"


Beep...beep...beep...beep...


"I'm hearing things. She's dead now...Get over it, Hoya"


Something seems to move in between Hoya's hand.


"Who's dead?"


Hoya shot up and saw Jaemin staring at him, smiling. He checked the heart monitor to see if it was real.


"Missed me?"


He stood up and immediately hugged her. He never knew miracles could happen. He couldnt believe it.


"Jaemin...Angel...Yes, I missed you. I'm so glad....so glad.."


He said in between his sobs



---


I thought I was a goner. Actually, I wanted to go. Thats what I thought when two people walked towards me. I couldnt clearly see their faces.


"Ahn Jaemin,"


A lady spoke.



"...its not your time yet. You still have unfinished business. Our son...needs you."


"Son? Mr. and Mrs. Lee? You're already dead?"


"Sadly, yes. We died in a car accident, Hoya was still a baby back then. We were driving back to the house when the break got broken and we crashed into a parked car. My wife protected Hoya so that she'll be the one to get crushed by the car door. The car had much of an impact that we were suddenly taken away. We felt sorry leaving our son. We hoped that someone might find him and take care of him. An old lady did, she took her as her own grandson. We were grateful for her. We're also grateful for you, since you're the person who will truly take care of him until the end of time...So please, you have to go back.."

They were right. I have to go back. I need to....want to take care of Hoya. I love him and I couldnt just leave him. Life has been controlling me all my life, this time its my turn. I opened my eyes and saw a blob of black hair






My life was magical all along. I was just thinking that it wasnt. It was my fault.

 I realize that life is like a plain paper at first, if you want put color in it, dont wait for the crayon to tap you on the shoulder. Reality isnt a bad place to live in after all. Just get a piece of your dreams and mix it. Let the magic work..


"Jaemin...what are you thinking of, my Angel?"


"Its just that the things in my head are much cooler. What I didnt know is that you could also make them happen here....you can make it real."

:)