“Seonsaengnim! What is the world?”

The man contemplated for a moment, pursing his lips as he ran a hand through his thinning hair. “Well… the world is Science – Physics and Chemistry and Biology – and Math, and languages, and Geography.”

==

And because Kim Taeyeon was once told, in the first year of elementary school, that the world was Science and Math and Geography and languages, here she sat, six years later, in the high school library, flipping through a textbook on Biology that was meant for students at least five years older than her.

Kid genius – that was what the teachers called her. The girl who scored straight As for every graded assignment, test and exam ever issued by the school, and yet looked no older than a ten year old.

“Taeyeon? Why do you study so hard?” A classmate once asked when she saw Taeyeon curled up among a heap of cushions in the corner of the library, reading some complicated English Literature book by Shakespeare that even their teacher didn’t seem to be able to understand.

The small girl looked up, staring at the classmate for a moment. “Sooyoung ah, what is the world?”

“What?”

“A teacher once told me that the world was Math and Science and Geography and languages, but I still don’t know what it is. So… I guess I’ll just study until I find out.” The small girl grinned, revealing a chin dimple.

And Sooyoung was left there standing and staring in awe as the girl once again buried her nose in that thick book of hers once again.

==

Three years later, Kim Taeyeon found herself sitting on a chair next to the hospital bed, head rested on the mattress, eyes closed as she held her mother’s hand.

“Umma, do you think… do you think you’ll know what the world is?” Taeyeon asked, sounding slightly strangled with the sobs that wanted to force their way up . She felt her mother’s other hand comb through her hair – it calmed her down and brought her back to her childhood, the days when her best friends were her crayons and her colouring book and of course, the endless cones of ice cream.

“Oh Taetae, death won’t give you an answer to the world. Life does – it always does.”

“But Umma… what is the world?”

“The world? Love. And hope, and happiness and dreams. Oh, I don’t know, Taetae, the world is what you think it is and what you want it to be. I can’t tell you what the world is; you can only find that out yourself.”

“But… how? I don’t understand, Umma.”

“You will one day, my dear, trust me. It might be difficult and painful and exhausting, but you will know one day; and when you do know, Taetae, don’t ever let go. Promise me, Taetae.”

For once in her life, Taeyeon didn’t understand. She was lost and confused and possibly a little frustrated, but the gentle seriousness in her mother’s voice had made her look up.

“I promise,” she whispered, feeling as if she had just taken a huge step into the unknown.

She had woken up the next morning to find the hand in hers cold and motionless. The sense of loss was overwhelming, and she cried for days and nights afterwards. But, when she finally saw the coffin being lowered into the huge rectangular hole in the ground, she had ran out of tears to cry and instead, stood in front waving, trying to give her mother one last smile before she would never see her again.

“I promise, Umma,” she whispered, letting the wind take her words to her mother’s grave before she finally turned around.

==

Taeyeon had never once forgotten her promise to her mother, but couldn’t seem to figure out what her mother meant.

Her mother said love; Taeyeon started to visit the orphanage every Saturday instead of spending her time at the library or cooped up at home reading another one of those thick books.

Her mother said hope; she tried to donate to charity as much as possible, or buy a meal for that little girl hiding from the cold in the alley in winter.

Her mother said happiness and she was pretty darn sure that she was happy right now.

Her mother said dreams, and that was what she found the most confusing. What was she to do now, when her dream was to find out what the world was?

A year later, she decided that she was going to simply go with the flow and see where it took her. After all, she reasoned, things always appear only when we stop trying to look for them.

==

By the end of her first year in college, Taeyeon had made quite the name for herself. The girl had taken all three pure sciences, economics and statistics, along with geography and English literature. The kid genius label stuck, but that was not the only thing that drew attention to her like a magnet.

The boys and girls alike stared when she walked past, for the unexplainable aura around her was too strong to ignore. Sooyoung, who had followed Taeyeon to the same college, snorted every time she heard someone call the girl pretty or adorable or even in some cases, perfection.

It was cheesy and completely unnecessary, she reasoned, only to get a pen thrown in her direction in the middle of class. When she looked back however, Taeyeon was still diligently listening in class, seemingly oblivious to whatever was going on.

That kid, Sooyoung muttered, she should’ve taken theatre too.

==

It was in her second year in college that she got chosen to be the head of the peer support group and prefect council.

She was at her usual corner in the library, half hidden in the hill of cushions, reading, when the principal approached her along with another girl.

The kid genius looked up, bringing a cushion up to cover half her face as she saw the girl staring at her.

“Ah, Taeyeon! This is Hwang Tiffany. She’s an international student from America so I hope you could bring her around. Please also inform the PSG and PC board about the new international students coming next week.” The principal briefed the still-hidden girl, who nodded without a word.

“Taeyeon ah, say something. Sometimes I wonder how you got the whole kid genius label thing going on when you look like that.” The principal chuckled.

“That’s why there’s the kid in there, Mr Park. Or else it’ll just be the pretty genius.” Taeyeon finally brought the cushion down to her torso, hugging it as she grinned.

“Whatever you say, then. Remember to inform the leadership boards by Friday!”

Taeyeon faked a salute as the man turned around to leave the girls alone.

Once Mr Park was gone, however, the girl started to withdraw to her usual quiet self when she was around people she didn’t know.

“Hello, my name is Tiffany!” The new girl cheerfully introduced herself, stretching out a hand.

“I’m Taeyeon, as you’ve heard.” The girl reached her hand up to shake Tiffany’s outstretched palm, taking the opportunity to pull the girl to sit next to her.

“I’ll drop the formalities since we’re the same age and I presume you’re not too used to it since it’s not American culture?” Taeyeon asked, earning a surprised nod from Tiffany.

“So, Tiffany, what stream are you taking?”

“Lit! Wait… uhhh…” Tiffany muttered, trying to recall the Korean term for Literature.

“English Literature?” Taeyeon asked, cheekily grinning.

“Wa-wait. You can speak English?!”

“Or would thou rather I speak Shakespearean, my fair lady?” Taeyeon asked, once again smiling that cheeky grin of hers.

==

At the end of the second year in college, when they all had to move on to university, Taeyeon had finally, after so long, decided to drop the unnecessary subjects and focus on a major and a side, as normal people would.

Following Tiffany, who chose to take Literature and Theatre studies in university, Taeyeon chose to take Literature and Psychology.

Of course, Taeyeon still topped all her classes, with the exception of the few times Tiffany got a mark or two above her for Literature.

And even now, as she sat in the seminar room listening to the professor brief the psychology-literature students on their new project, she found the other students’ eyes all glued to her instead of the balding old man speaking in front.

“So, class, I would like you guys to complete a literary piece based on the different aspects of psychology. Kinesics, interpersonal relationships and so on. I expect it to be submitted by mid-term. Thank you.”

The first thing Taeyeon had done was to stare at the professor, furrowing her eyebrows, contemplating on how she was going to complete such an assignment. The second, however, was to phone Tiffany and ask her for help.

“Why don’t you do it on love? The different aspects of love, or love from the point of view of different parties.” Tiffany, being the absolute romantic she was, immediately suggested. And Taeyeon immediately accepted that idea.

Taeyeon had decided, after some discussion and a whole lot of contemplation, that she would attempt expressing a relationship between two people from both their perspectives, alternating between characters, bringing them through different obstacles along the way, showing their thought process and their observation of each other. Then, she would end off with a third party’s observation of the relationship. How she was going to make this poetry, she still hadn’t any idea.

The next few weeks were spent completing the assignment, with Taeyeon sitting on the bed, head resting on a cushion, notebook balanced atop her raised knees, scribbling furiously, then canceling, then scribbling again, and once in a while stopping to reach over for the cup of hot chocolate that Tiffany had set down on the bedside table for her. Of course, Tiffany was there too, sitting on Taeyeon’s left, head resting on Taeyeon’s shoulder, sometimes asleep, sometimes awake.

==

Everyone had breakdowns once in a while and even though not very often, that included Kim Taeyeon. The first time Tiffany witnessed one, she had gotten a shock, and later that night, ended up crying along with the girl as she tried to comfort her.

A month into the assignment, Taeyeon had finally gotten so frustrated and so close to giving up. Gripping the mechanical pencil so hard that her knuckles turned whiter than they already were, she ignored the sting coming to her eyes.

Tiffany was awoken by the sound of choked sobs and lifted up her head to see Taeyeon staring helplessly at the notebook, tears running down her messy face and sweaty bangs plastered on her forehead. Turning to look at the book, she saw the page filled with messy cancelations instead of the usual neat ones.

Keeping quiet, she observed as Taeyeon scribbled something into the book, handwriting bigger and more scrawl-like than usual due to her trembling hands. The girl than stared at it for a good five seconds, furrowing her eyebrows, than cancelled it away, effectively completely filling the page with black lead markings.

Tiffany wanted to say something, but didn’t know what to say, and so chose to stay quiet, feeling the ache in her heart grow as she watched the sobbing girl. “Taeyeon,” she finally called out when she couldn’t stand not saying anything.

Taeyeon had cried harder when she heard Tiffany’s voice, her tears staining the bottom of the page. Tiffany reached out, unwrapping Taeyeon’s fingers around the pen before taking it away, along with the book, and placing it on the bedside table. She turned off the lights, helped Taeyeon lie down, and then covered the girl with the blanket before crawling underneath.

“Sleep, you’ll be okay tomorrow.” She whispered, her voice cracking as she Taeyeon’s hair. She felt Taeyeon shift closer, then felt the arms wrap around her waist as Taeyeon buried her face in her chest. “Sleep,” she whispered again, wrapping her own arms around Taeyeon.

Feeling the small girl trembling and hearing her sobs, Tiffany finally felt her own tears fall as she hugged Taeyeon closer. “Don’t cry, Taeyeon, you’ll be fine.” She managed to choke out despite her own sobs.

After a while, Tiffany finally felt the trembling die down slightly, and then she heard, amidst the still ongoing sobs, a soft ‘thank you’ from the girl in her arms, and as she gasped and choked on the sudden breath, she felt the tears fall all over again.

==

Taeyeon had woken up the next morning, in the same position that they had fallen asleep in. Looking up, she saw the dried up tear streaks as the sun shone onto Tiffany’s face. And as she saw Tiffany’s eyes flutter open, her long eyelashes framing the deep brown orbs, she gasped at the sudden realization that came at her like that waves.

She didn’t know how long it lasted, but she remembered staring into Tiffany’s eyes for the longest time. She remembered how it felt like – like she could see Tiffany’s soul, and Tiffany could see hers, like everything was finally laid out in the open for her. And she remembered the erratic beating of her heart, and the feeling of her soul getting out of her.

In that moment, Taeyeon had finally realized what her mother meant, what love and hope and happiness and dreams felt like. And she remembered, afterward, as she reached up to kiss Tiffany, the feeling of finally, finally knowing what the world is. 

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[A/N] I did enjoy writing this and developing the characters, especially Taeyeon :) This must be the longest one shot I've ever written... I think. Anyways, I hope you guys liked it! ^^