I opened my door, not really surprised that there’s another teddy bear lying on my door mat. This is the second time today and the numerable time this year. I don’t even care at all. I mean, I’m beautiful, I know that. Never mind.

I grabbed the teddy bear before closing the door. I threw the toy on the couch in front of the television before jumping on it. I grabbed the teddy bear and looked at it.

“Why won’t I accept you anyway? You’re cute, nice and gentleman.” Clearly, I was talking about the guy not the teddy bear.

Actually, the gifts and teddy bears (plus the flowers) came from the same guy.

We met once in a bar. He came right at me and told me tons of compliments, telling me I’m beautiful all those cliché things. I knew that. Cocky bastard I am. Then, after that, he asked for my number and I gladly gave it to him. I was drunk that time so I don’t even care who the hell he is. He introduced himself, something like Jong, and all I understand was the Jong since I was drunk, right? He’s the one who brought me home too, that’s why he found out where I live. ! !

After that, he kept bringing me these ty stuffs.

Do you wonder why I’m in a bar that time? I guess you wondered. Uhm, it’s because the same day my boyfriend broke up with me. Its ! He’s my second boyfriend and we lasted two years. And, those two years were the best years of my life. He’s really sweet and gentleman. And that same day, he came up to me and told he don’t love me anymore. He had enough of me. And he left. That’s it! There’s no proper reason, I guess that’s counted as I reason. But, those words had hurt me a lot. And because of that, I don’t want any guy get in my heart anymore.

That was two months ago and I’m still not over it. And between those two months, I had dated more than ten guys and after weeks, I broke up with them. Why? That same reason that my ex-real boyfriend told me. I can play the same guy as he is. I can play with guys like they are my Ken doll.

After what he did, I started dating random guys. Never really love them, just time wasting.

It either they like me or I like them. I never had trouble getting what I want anyway.

But, this particular guy (this JONG guy) had seen me dating these random guys and never stopped wooing me. I mean, even though I am dating a guy, he kept sending me this stuffs. Weird, isn’t it? And it’s giving a lot of Goosebumps.

I’m starting to feel a little nervous every time I received a message from him, a call and a visit. We never really went to a real date before. He just comes here and brings me some breakfast or lunch or even dinner.

He asked me several times if we can go out sometime but I kept refusing him. He really looks different from other guys. He looks fragile, like I was afraid to hurt him. Not like the other guys’. I’ve seen them hurt and it doesn’t affect me but this JONG guy is very different.

Ashtrays and Heart breaks, Ashtrays and Heart breaks ~

That was my phone; I picked it up and got greeted by a very husky voice.

“Hi Key,” He greeted, that was Jong.

“Hi,” I greeted back. But, now, I feel a lot more nervous.

“You know, this is the last time I’m going to ask you this, all you have to do is answer me yes or no, if you’ll no I’ll leave you and never bother you again,” He paused. I’m getting so nervous. I hate this feeling. The feeling of being in love again. I hated this. I don’t want to fall in love again, it hurts a lot.

His voice, I love it.

He once sings for me before going to sleep. And, I loved it.

I don’t know about this. But, every time he comes visit me here, I always clean my whole house (even though he’ll just be staying on the door). I always prepare something nice to wear. Was that a sign that I am falling for this guy?

Sigh. I never wanted this. After what that guy did to me, I never wanted to fall in love again.

But I keep covering up the signs that I’m falling in love with him.

He makes me glow; he makes me like I’m different person. He’s using his stupid charm.

I tried putting my defenses up but I kept falling down, I’m trying to get up from this feeling but I can’t help it.

“Can you please go out with me?” He asked over the phone. He said please. That freaking please again. He’s a polite bastard.

I quiet down, don’t know what to answer. Should I say no? or yes? Argh! I really don’t know what to say. If I say yes, he might just break my heart like what the did to me. If I say no, he’ll leave my alone. I might miss him. Here’s comes the feeling again. This is !

“Yes,” I breathed out. It took me 1 minute to make this decision.

He shouted, “YES! Thank you so much, Key. I will never let you down! We’ll meet tomorrow; I’ll pick you up at 8 am. Thank you Key! I love you.”

Those three words that I’m looking for. I wish this relationship work out because I don’t want another Heart attack.

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Annyeong ♥



- HyoKey29 outtttt ~