Laying on the bed, she recalled her past.

2008, it was Junsu.

2010, it was Leetuek.

None of the relationships worked out. 

Taeyeon puts on a cold laugh.

2009, Gdragon last minute withdrawal from WGM, and as a result, they got Jung Hyungdon to replace him. Getting "married" to Jung was one of the worst thing that can happen to Taeyeon, and it happened. To make things more complicated, Jung was made to drop out from the show because he got himself a real girlfriend during WGM terms. Insulting... that was way too insulting for Taeyeon, even though she didn't enjoy her time with Jung at all.

2012, G.O asked her out. Instead of the possibility of turning a friendship into something romantic, it turned out to be just a friendly catching-up dinner, i.e. nothing happened. This is embarassing, because everyone in the industry knows how good a player G.O is, and yet, he didn't lay his fingers on her (so that's how unattractive she is, Taeyeon thought to herself).

She is tired. Taeyeon is sick of being a loser in relationships. In fact, she has never been in a proper relationship ever. The only one she acknowledged was her first love - Kim Junsu, probably the man she loved the most in her 25 years of life. However, the huge fandom of TVQX back then was influential, and due to that, Taeyeon and Junsu could hardly date like a normal couple.

Taeyeon regretted. She regretted for not cherishing Junsu and allowed whatever was happening between SM and Junsu to affect their relationship. Taeyeon was prideful then. She thought she can find a better relationship, and she yearned for one with lesser issues and lesser stress than what she had with Junsu. And so, she gave him up too easily.

Then it came Leetuek whom she always looked at him as an oppa, especially since Junsu was best pal with Leetuek since trainee days. However, feelings grew between them when Leeteuk was supposed to take care of Taeyeon on behalf of Junsu. Tension grew between two brothers because of that. Taeyeon was under a lot of stress when the two of them fell out over her. She felt bad and uncertain. She still missed Junsu but she knew they were impossible. But Taeyeon just couldn't fully commit herself to Leetuek for a long while, and in the end, Leetuek decided to cheat on her.

2012, times got better when her attention was shifted to something new in her life. SM debuted a new boy group. 12 boys with fresh faces and lively personalities lightened up her life. Taeyeon became happier and she was commited to help those boys to promote. However, things changed when she heard this from one of the boys...

“Of course not!! Why would I be interested in someone older? Like hyung said, it's a "game"..... I'm just fooling around with her. Besides, she is popular, getting near her will help in increasing our exposure to media. Manager hyung always encourage us to move front and grab camera attention, right? That's what we need right now as a rookie. So don't spit nonsense and spoil my plan... (laughs)”

Taeyeon was disheartened. This conversation came from the boys whom she earnestly helped and care about, and those words came from the one whom she care the most. She used to think he is special, different, one of a kind... and she was wrong about it.

Taeyeon came to realize her hoping for true love and a committed relationship is nothing but a foolish thought. Her status as the leader of the national girl group can never allow her to date like a normal woman. Furthermore, she can never know what those guys are going after when they get close to her.

To gain fame and popularity?

To attract attention from media?

Or she is just one of those woman who can give them ?

She eventually gave up. Taeyeon gave up on her foolish hopes and naive fantasy of finding her wangjanim. She just want to be happy. It doesn't matter who the man is, and it no longer matters what a man is going after when he is with her. As long as they are happy, that's all it matters. Ever if it's just for a while, even if it's just for one night...

A beep came from her Galaxy S3.

Taeyeon sit up and check on the incoming text.

“Noona, it's Sehun. I'm alone in the dorm. Can you get me some food? (smirks)”

A cold grin flashed across Taeyeon's face.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Getting off the van...
 

Kyungsoo: The concert was disappointing..

Suho: It's a pity, I didn't expect them to call it off due to technical problems.

Chanyeol: And they kept the audiences waiting for like more than 45 mins before telling us the concert is called off. 

Kai: (smile) Luckily, Sehun didn't join us.

Baekhyun: Yeah, otherwise the media might caught him rolling his eyes with frustration again. (laughs)

Kai: (laugh) Not the media. Usually are the fans who captured those unsightly pics of us.

Baekhyun: (laugh) Yeah, you are right.

Kyungsoo: (widen his eyes) Opps..

Suho: What's wrong??

Kyungsoo: We forgot to call Sehun. He said we have to call him before we return.

Chanyeol: Call him for what??

Baekhyun: For food?

Kyungsoo: (shrug) I don't know. He just want to make sure we call. He even threatened me if we didn't call, he will take my pics when I'm asleep.

The rest: (frown) Then that's your own problem!! (laughs)

Opening the door, they heard noises coming from the kitchen. Thinking his territory was invaded by Sehun who never know how to manage a ladle and pot, Kyungsoo ran first into the dorm. While the rest just casually join behind. Stepping his foot into the kitchen, welcoming Kyungsoo is a sight he probably never expect to see in his kitchen, or rather.....  in his entire life.

Kyungsoo: (eyes widened) What are you two doing in my kitchen??

Noticing the audiences, Sehun quickly pull himself away from the kiss,

and trying to hide the woman behind him.

Chanyeol: (jaw dropped) WTF IS GOING ON HERE??

Kai/Suho: (stunned in silence) 

Baekhyun: (last to join and caught in shock)

Sehun: hyungs...erh.. (stuttering)

What further surprised the rest is,
when the woman run her fingers through her hair, revealing her face.

Chanyeol: (mouth wide open) Tae..taeyeon noona?

Suho/Kai: (eyeballs stuck out) Sunbaenim?!

Baekhyun: ......

Kyungsoo: You two in my kitchen??
 

Taeyeon bit her lips with a weak smile,

while her hands busy buttoning up the first two buttons on her blouse.

The rest just stood there watching in silence as Taeyeon fix her clothes and bed hair.
 

Taeyeon: (get down from the dining table and turned over to the boys) Hey, erm.... actually I brought some food for all of you.

Suho: (eyes still widened) .....eh, food?

Taeyeon: (quickly bend down to pull out the bags of food which Sehun placed under when they were using the dining table).

Chanyeol: (mouth still opened, turning his head towards his room-mate, Baekhyun)

Baekhyun: (freezed in silence as he tries to decipher what exactly he is witnessing right now)

Taeyeon: (noticed the awkwardness) Look guys, I gotta go... Erm, enjoy the snacks. (signalling to Sehun)

Sehun: (running his finger through his hair, got the hint) I... I see you out.

Sehun walked Taeyeon to the doorstep before she puts on a cap and leaves the dorm.

Returning to the dorm, Sehun felt the air in the area becomes stale.

Kyungsoo is eating him up with his stares, while Suho angrily sat on one of the chairs.

Kai and Chanyeol still stucked with the shock and as for Baekhyun, he is nowhere to be seen.

Suho: You broke the rules. No woman allowed, remember?

Sehun: (avoided the glare) It's not like she's any random woman. Besides, it's not her first time here.

Kai: She usually just bring us food, not.....

Chanyeol: Were you two trying to have ? Here in our dorm??

Kyungsoo: (fiery eyes) in my kitchen???

Sehun: (casually sat down) If you guys didn't appear suddenly... we might have got there.

Suho: Are you crazy?? That's a sunbaenim you were making out with!

Sehun: What's wrong with making out with a sunbae?

Chanyeol: You desperate bastard. Of all people, why her? Spare a thought for Baekhyun.

Sehun: What has this gotta do with Baekhyun hyung??

Chanyeol: Are you trying to act oblivious, or are you suffering from memory lost? Can't you be more sensitive? If you want to f**k her, at least go somewhere else!

Sehun: (laugh) C'mon, don't put it as if I snatched her away from him! Whatever between them is in the past. Besides, nothing happened. He said he's not interested, remember?

Chanyeol: (sigh)

Kai: (looking behind Chanyeol) Baek... hyung.

Chanyeol looked behind his shoulders and the rest looked up.

And they found Baekhyun standing right there.

Sehun: He's here. Just ask him. (walk over to Baek)

Baekhyun: ...

Sehun: Remember that SMTown concert last year, we asked you if you are interested in her. You said you are not right? I remember that clearly...

| FLASHBACK: One year ago |

It was SMT Seoul. Baekhyun was having the best of his life time enjoying the stage, enjoying his performances with all his peers and sunbaes whom he respect and admires. And most importantly, she was there. The woman who catches his breath away each time he sees her in person. Pretty, cute, gorgeous, talented and y at the same time. She has been kind to his group and him personally since they debuted earlier the year. He knew. He realized it wasn't merely admiration that keeps his eyes on her. He is certain that admiration has grew into affection when she first whispered into his ears.....

"Good job, Baekhyun!"

Those words and the feel of her breath tickling his ears stays with him for the rest of the night. He knew very well it's risky to stay near her. Both of them are idols. It's a public concert. Everywhere are fans with HD cameras. The concert will get broadcasted. But he just couldn't help it. He knew he hardly has chance to get close to her like this again. It's going to be another few months of seperation before they meet again in the next event like this. So he took his chance. He followed her around, staying his foot at close proximity from her, constantly looking out for her....trying to be as discreet as possible at the same time. 

When the concert comes to an end... 

Lay: (smiling evily at Baek who just entered the waiting room)

Baekhyun: What's with that smile?

Xiumin: We saw what you were doing out there.

Baekhyun: (acting oblivious) ...what?

Xiumin: You were all over her!! Your eyes didn't leave her for more than 2 secs. I swear!! 

Lay: (wrap his arms over Baek shoulders) I know she's hot. But you were too obvious. You should have just calm your soul down and be cool about it. That will appear more manly. 

Chen: (scoffs) You should see how he sang during the opening. Baek, it was meant to be a group song, not a duet okay!

Baekhyun: (blink his eyes) W--What are you all talking about? Stop spitting nonsense.

Baekhyun tried to escape the attacks from his fellow EXO-M mates, and walked towards his EXO-K members.

Chanyeol: Uh-uhhh, don't try to come here for help. We saw it too.

Suho: (judging face) What are you up to now? First, failing to hide your affection for SNSD sunbaenims on purpose. And now trying to get close to their leader? What sort of game is this?

Kai: Yeah, and you intend to play this game alone? Without us??

Sehun: (smile) Guys, I don't think noona will fall into his silly game. She prefers tall guys like me (bit his lips naughtily). She just smiled at me with so much affection....did you guys see it?

Kyungsoo: (roll his eyes with disgust) Shut up Sehun. The topic is not on you now.

Baekhyun: (avoid the glazes and start removing his makeup) I seriously don't get you guys.

Lay: (serious face) If it's not a game, don't tell me you really fall for our sunbae??

Chen: And that's against our rule, you know.

Suho: And you think our manager is blind. I believe very soon we'll get to see the fan-cams and fan-made mvs. Good luck!

Chanyeol: (seriously tap on Baek's arm) Eh, you really fell for her? (laughs)

Hearing what his group mates had said, Baekhyun realized things might probably gets out of hand. If s noticed it, the fans might have noticed it too. What if the fan-cams captured all those moments? What if their manager knows about it? He will probably get another round of preaching from manager hyung. First thing first, he needs to shove off his group mates before these stories travel to other labelmates. It'd be so embarassing and awkward. He needs to think of some excuses. Baekhyun knew he's always good with his words, and he can make people believe in them.

“Of course not!! Why would I be interested in someone older? Like hyung said, it's a "game".... I'm just fooling around with her. Besides, she is popular, getting near her will help in increasing our exposure to media. Manager hyung always encourage us to move front and grab camera attention, right? That's what we need right now as a rookie. So don't spit nonsense and spoil my plan... (laughs)”

| FLASHBACK: ends |
 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

|SMent Building |

Baekhyun making his way to the recording studio. He is here today to do some touch up on his vocals in one of EXO-K latest tracks. Passing by the stretch of recording studios, he heard laughing noises from one of the rooms. Out of curiousity, he casually peep into the room. 

It's her. And a man.

He doesn't know who that man is. He doesn't seem to be a staff here. He looks abit too mature for a trainee. Or maybe he is some record producers or one of the dancers. Whatever... he knows it's none of his business. As Baekhyun was about to look away, he saw her placing a quick peck on that man's cheek. Baekhyun freezed again. This time, his peep was caught by her who happened to look over his direction.

Noticing he was caught,

Baekhyun quickly look away and continue his walk to his record studio.

"Stop right there..."

A voice calling from behind asking him to stop.

Baekhyun stopped and turn around.

Taeyeon: Didn't you know it's rude to peep like that? (walking over to baek)

Baekhyun: (blinking his eyes without knowing what to say)

Taeyeon: What did you see?

Baekhyun: (look away) Nothing.

Taeyeon: You saw that, didn't you?

Baekhyun: (sigh) Kind of, but since it's none of my business, I'll just take it as I saw nothing.

Taeyeon: (laughs) This is headache. To get caught by the same person twice in a roll within three days.

Baekhyun: (muttering) as if I will go around telling others...

Taeyeon: (cannot hear him clearly) Say that again.

Baekhyun: (clear his throat) Nothing. Erm, were you....were you cheating on Sehun just now?

Taeyeon: (widen his eyes with surprise) Ch--cheating?? 

Baekhhyun: Aren't you and Sehun an item? Why did you do that behind his back?

Taeyeon: ...... (laughs)

Baekhyun: This is not funny. Sehun is my good brother. I don't want him to get hurt.

Taeyeon: Wait, then did your good brother tell you there's nothing between us?

Baekhyun: How can it be nothing?? We saw the two of you in our dorm....
 

Taeyeon: (cuts his words) Okay, let me get this clear first. Just now that man you saw was the producer of a new OST which I'm working on right now. And that kiss on his cheek was just a friendly gesture, okay. As for Sehun...

Baekhyun: .....

Taeyeon: You are a grown up man. You should know there isn't neccessary to have any commitments when two person hang out and have fun. Get what I mean?

Baekhyun: (shook his head) 

Taeyeon: (bit her lips and tilt her head) ... kind of like hanging around together with no strings attached.

Baekhyun: You mean you are just taking Sehun as a fling?? You are just playing with his feelings?!

Taeyeon:  SHhhhh!!!!

Before he can confront further, Baekhyun felt a grip on his wrist and he was dragged into a room.

It's like being into a vacuum. 

The studio is empty. The door is locked. And the lights weren't on.

There is no slightest noise. Only their breathing can be heard.

Baekhyun raised his head and looked at her.

Taeyeon: Why raise your voice like that? Do you want the whole SM to know about it?!

Baekhyun: (clenched his teeth and sigh)

Taeyeon: Both of us just wanted to have fun and we agreed on that. Please don't put it like I'm cheating on him or toying with his feelings.

Baekhyun: (filled with anger) This is absurd! Sehun is still young. Of course he is naive on such things. How could you... as a sunbae, as a noona play along with him!!

Taeyeon: (blood start to boil) Wae, who are you to judge me? (point her index finger on his chest)

Baekhyun: I'm not judging. I just don't want my group mate to get hurt in any sort of ways.

Taeyeon: (look away and mutter) So that's all you care about? Your maknae. Your group member. Great!

Baekhyun: What did you say?

Taeyeon: FYI, your maknae is 20 years old. He is an adult. He is old enough to judge what he wants. Stop trying to be a Saint here! Act all you want in front of your fans, but you know you aren't an angel yourself!!

Baekhyun: what??

Taeyeon: (step closer) You knew very well what you did! 

As Taeyeon stepped closer, their faces bacame just inches apart. Though they are in some form of arguments, that close distance didn't fail to make his heart beat faster. He could smell her scent and almost felt her breath on his face. He scanned through her delicate features. She looks cute even when she's angry. Looking down from her eyes, to her nose until his eyes set on her lips.

A few moments of silence.

Taeyeon: What are you looking at?

Baekhyun: (look up into her eyes) 

Taeyeon: You were staring at my lips, aren't you? 

Baekhyun: (bit his lips and quickly look away)

Taeyeon: You were thinking of kissing me, were you?

Baekhyun: (starts to pant a little)

Taeyeon: Kiss me then.

Baekhyun: (look back into her eyes in surprise)

Taeyeon: Why? Are you scared?

Baekhyun: (swallow a lump in his throat)

Taeyeon: (stepped closer and placed her arms around Baek's neck)

"Just kiss me.."

Baekhyun can feel her chest touching his. He starts to pant harder as his body starts to react to her skinship. He closed his eyes and swallow another lump in his throat, while Taeyeon tiptoed to leave a small bite on his neck. Reacting to that little sore on his sensitive neck, Baekhyun opened his eyes....... looking at Taeyeon while biting his own lips.

Slowly releasing his bite on his own lips, Baekhyun gently lower his head and lean his face forward....

Taeyeon: (pushed him away before his lips touches hers)

Baekhyun: (stunned by the push)

Taeyeon: See, just a little work from me, you couldn't resist. (laughs) All man are the same afterall, and you are not an exception.

Baekhyun: (brows furrowed) You were trying me? 

Taeyeon: (smile) In return for what you did to me a year ago.

Baekhyun: ....eh?

Taeyeon: (smile coldly) I thought you aren't interested in older woman. Why did you still try to kiss me then?

Baekhyun: (surprised) how did you.....?

Taeyeon: How did I know? I heard your conversation with your members. (shaking her head) You are such a letdown. I was nice to you and in return, you used me to invest on your popularity and worst, saying that behind my back. And now, you are trying to be a nice man and ask me not to fool around with your friend? (scoffs) Byun Baekhyun, what are you?  A chameleon?? 

Taeyeon turned away and reached her hands to unlock the door... wanting to leave.

But a grab on the hands stopped her.

Baekhyun: Is that why you decided to ignore me after since?

Taeyeon: (look away in disgust)

Baekhyun: But it wasn't like what you heard. It was a misunderstanding. I can explain.

Taeyeon: I know you are good at words. But don't try to find excuses. I won't buy that. 

Baekhyun: (held her hands tighter) No, I said all that because...

Taeyeon: Because what?

Baekhyun: I... Because I was afraid they will start spreading nonsense about both of us.

Taeyeon: ....what nonsense??

Baekhyun explained. He explained his intention for saying those ungrateful words behind Taeyeon's back. He wanted to convince s. He had to convince them so they wouldn't spread those rumors around and ending up, making the both of them feeling awkward and embarassed. That would be the last thing he wants to happen between them. Worst, if those rumors reached the media and fans, SM would probably made them to break ties with each other. He knew he should have came out with something better, but at that time, he could only think of that excuse within seconds.

Taeyeon: (look at him doubtfully) 

Baekhyun: I swear. If any of these things I said is untrue. I will lose my voice forever!

Taeyeon: (cuts his words with her finger) Don't! Your voice is too precious for you to swear like that.

Baekhyun: (hold onto her hand and removed it from his lips) There are things I find more precious than my voice actually. (clears his throat) I didn't know what's the reason you ignored me all these while and that left me devastated. Why didn't you confront me earlier? Then I can explain myself to you and this misunderstanding will end earlier.

Taeyeon: you were devestated because I ignored you?

Baekhyun: Of course I do. You mean a lot to me. I mean..... not just as a sunbae...not just as a noona...

Taeyeon: ... not a sunbae, not a noona. Then what?

Baekhyun: You are the one thing that is more precious than my voice.

Taeyeon:  (mouth slighlty open in surprise)

Baekhyun: (look down) Since day one we met. I thought it was mere admiration, but I realized it's more than that when you first leaned close to me that day at SMT Seoul. It was also the first time my heart skipped a beat over a girl.

Taeyeon: (still doubtful) ...really?

Lifting his head, Baekhyun looked at Taeyeon with a firm nod.

Gently, Taeyeon stepped closer and raised her arms, placing them on his chest. 

Taeyeon: Prove it to me then.

Baekhyun: (watching her as she closed her eyes)

Slowly, he leaned in and about to press his lips onto hers. 

Taeyeon: (gently whisper) Aren't you scared Sehun knew about this, and blame you for double-crossing him?

Baekhyun: (smile) Who cares, I'm not a Saint afterall.

Baekhyun held her waist closer to him, and Taeyeon smile at it.

He then leaned in again..... placing a deep passionate kiss onto those lips of hers.

- STORY END -